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i'm sad to say that i'm no longer seeing Anyone at this moment. i'm thoroughly heartbroken because i really thought i found a match. Truly be ready for someone that has spirit and a brain. i'm very submissive by nature, and although physically i can submit to Anyone, it will take someone special to get me to submit mentally and emotionally.
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i am appologizing to E/everyone i have not written back to. i have returned from a heavenly vacation and found myself in a very painful feud between people i care about. i am also in the thick of school and a new position at work where i am now the head stablemanager which means i am trying to organize that as well. i ask for patience and as long as you are female and/or polite you will be responded too. Thank you
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Greetings E/everyone
Just a note to let ya'll know im on vaca in beautiful Curacao!!! I'll return on Tuesday night so ill be responding sometime after then. Take care ^_^
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Trust...what is trust.
Trust...trust is giving someone the power of your soul and trusting them to take care of it. Trusting that they will Do whats in Your best interest or when matters come up, that they will think about you and your feelings.
Trust is not letting someone whip you and believing they will stop. That's called safe and sane. Or if they dont abide...abuse or homicide. But not trust.
Everyone wants to be the Dom/me but no one wants to earn the title. i had a man email me asking me if i was interested in "submitting to Him" well first off it was apparent that he Hadnt read my profile. But i was polite and responded back with a no thank You i can't have a man cause i'm married. Well wouldnt You know the asshole dares to write back accusing me of cheating on my husband even though it Clearly states in my profile that he knows. How ignorant is that?
It's like to claim to be a Master/Mistress...you have to be willing to do the dirty work. You have to be willing to take a brat and make him/her shine. Find that inner quality and bring it out. Instead all i find in life are people that want a stupid little shy girl to quietly obey their every command. How boring and unoriginal! Life should be about having fun, playfulness. Everyonce and a while "forgetting" where you put the whip just to keep them on their toes. Otherwise what good is the rewards if you didnt have to sow the seed (metaphorically speaking).
Well my thoughts for now. Ciao!
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Its almost scary how when meeting an actual safe, sane, caring person, how quickly one gives into the submission. So many on here are looking out for their Own interests. For someone to serve them, to have only their best interests served. While i know that should be a goal for a submissive, should it not be vice-versa? If i am trusting my life/feelings to someone should they not also have my best concerns in mind. Not just in training how to serve, but to help in life. Not the one i've found. She makes me Want to serve her better. She digs deep inside of me and brings out my deepest desires to submit. Yet she listens to me. i dont have to be silent for the entire day. She loves to hear what i say. How my days are. She gets me to think my problems through, not ignore them.
i try to keep cautious, and to not let myself go. Trust is so hard. Yet when in Her prescence, it's almost impossible not to feel the trusting submissive desires she stirs. i saw her on Tuesday and couldn't help but be in awe over her beauty and intelligence. She seems to already know my thoughts even before i do. She is able to read me.
When i don't talk to Her even for a day, i am so lonely. i know She is busy with her life outside, yet i yearn to hear her voice. Her text messages bring a smile to my face every time.
i know i am taking a chance by letting myself feel this way but i trust Her. She has already had chances to let me go, and has not. So i have faith in Her.
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i met my new Domme for the first time on tuesday *yes i realize its saturday but better late then never* She is more fabulous then i could hope for. Every person has this list that they keep in their head. Whether looking for a spouse or a partner. It has the qualities they need to have, and qualities they have to have. Amazingly enough She is All i am looking for. She is beautiful, and very nice. She is patient but has a stunning personality. And her eyes are to die for. i get so caught up in them i could just stare all day. She is so confident about herself and her prescence commands respect though i feel like i can be myself around her. When i was over her lap, i felt safe although it was the first time she had spanked me.
i look forward to seeing her very very soon. Just the thought of our next day together fills me with excitement. i'll admit my first posting did not convey this much because i was not certain. i mean can you blame me? How many claim to be something they are not? Not this one! She is true to form and i look forward to our journey begining together.
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i have met a Very wonderful Domme whom is very eager to start training me. She has everything that i have been searching for and i can't wait to start training with her!! i know she can take me places i have only dreamed of before. i look forward to posting as the relationship continues.
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Seriously, although i am looking to serve women and only women, if someone is genuinely looking for a friendship then please dont hesitate to message me. i am probabuly one of the least judgemental person in NJ. Gay, straight, bi, looking for male, looking for female. All are acceptable when looking for a friendship ^_^
In my mind to be judgemental is to limit ones mind to the limitless possibilities of the world. Life's short (and so am i)...LIVE LARGE!! ^_^
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i would like to thank Everyone for their emails. i just got back from a visit to family in mass/NH over the weekend. i dont get to go up often so i really enjoyed it.
Having said that i got back very late last night and had school tonight. i promise to respond to E/everyone that has written to me ASAP. i won't send any half-ass emails ^_^
PS to clarify, i am looking for women only. Thank you and best wishes to A/all!!
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