CASCAsflame

well this is our first christmas without Masters mum its been a hard year but our love has grown

slave and Master are both dealing with the loss of a love one we respectfully ask that all give us both time to grieve

This slave is assisting Master through a family crisis and difficult time at the moment

Please at this time reaspect that neither of us will be online much and be patient if we do not answer mail immediately

Tomorrow is Masters birthday slave hopes that over the weekend she made it special and that tomorrow is a special special day for Master filled with everything He desires

CAN SOMEONE ANY ONE TELL ME WHERE ON MY PROFILE IT SAYS IM A DOMME JUST HAD SOMEONE ABUSSING ME AS APPARANTLY ALL WOMAN ARE SUBS

AND IM CRAZY FOR CLAIMING TO BE A DOMME

I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW WHERE THAT IS

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr finally get my temp below 38oC only to develop gastro

is not a well girl

Has been the absolute day from hell if it could go wrong today it has and then some

One more thing goes ass up and i dont think my behaviour will be very slave like think i will loose it and just scream

This slave is so very very very proud of her wonderful Master.

Some may ask why slave is beaming and so proud so she will answer.

Her Master was recogniced as a member of the leather community and was presented with a badge on behalf of MAst

This is a true honour to be recognized as a Master by acclaimed member of the community and lifestyle and as such slave is proud to be owned by such a wonderful man

In tune with your submissive? The dominant is the one calling the shots. What does the dominant care about the submissive?

Believe it or not, the dynamics of a BDSM relationship are often driven by the submissive, not by the dominant. The submissive sets the limits; the submissive decides what places can and can not be explored; the submissive has the ability to call a halt to the scene. The dominant, in many ways, is simply a facilitator. It's the dominant's job to create a setting where the people involved can explore the submissive's fantasies.

(As an aside, it's important to note that these limits can change over time. It may be that something that used to sound like it wouldn't be fun or interesting might in the future tickle your fancy; and that things you enjoy now, you may not necessarily enjoy in the future. People change over time. It's important, when you explore BDSM, to remember that, and to make a habit of talking to your partner about things you like and don't like as those things change.)

Dominating your partners does not mean that you don't want to please them. It is not always, or even usually, true that a dominant is interested in his own gratification rather than his submissive's. In fact, many dominants are driven as much by their desire to please their partner as by anything else; the psychology of a healthy BDSM relationship is driven by the submissive as well as by the dominant, and a dominant can take pleasure from gratifying the needs of the submissive just as easily as the submissive can take pleasure from gratifying the needs of the dominant. This kind of thing is not one-directional.

BDSM isn't what you see in porn flicks.

 The image of BDSM that is portrayed in many materials of this sort has about as much to do with BDSM as the child's tale "Jack and the Magic Beanstalk" has to do with agriculture. These materials show little more than women being used in various unoriginal ways for men's enjoyment, often by force. The reality is that there are at least as many, and perhaps more, male submissives than female submissives; and that BDSM is a mutual activity that is driven as much by the needs of the submissive than by the needs of the dominant.

IN PARTICULAR ,BDSM IS NOT ABUSE

People who are practicing BDSM in any of its trillions of forms are doing it voluntarily, for fun. It's a way to explore. Everything that happens in a BDSM relationship is consensual; and believe it or not, it's not just about the dominant getting what he or she wants--it's more about the submissive getting what he or she wants.

An abuser has no regard for the feelings, needs, or limits of the victim. A BDSM dominant is concerned above all else with the needs and desires of the submissive. Pretty straightforward, reallyIN PARTICULAR BDSM, IS NOT ABUSE

BDSM is as varied as the people who do it.

I've met many people who engage in BDSM activities, such as bondage or spanking, but who insist they are "not into that BDSM stuff." Usually, it's because they have an idea in their heads about what BDSM is, like "BDSM means wearing a leather mask and being chaned to a wall and whipped, and I don't like that, so I'm not into BDSM." But BDSM desn't necessarily mean wearing a hood and being chaned to the wall. If you like being lightly spanked, or light bondage excites you, then you're into BDSM.

Some people, myself included, love the aesthetic of an elaborate rope harness, or an elaborate form of bondage; others simply aren't interested in the bondage elements at all. The key to all these different forms of BDSM, though, is the exchange of power or sensation. One person (the "bottom" or "submissive") is choosing to allow the other person (the "top" or "dominant") to have control over him or her in some way, or to inflict sensation in some way. Perhaps it means allowing the other person to tie him up, perhaps it means allowing the other person to spank her, whatever.

BDSM doesn't have to involve all of these.

There are many people involved in BDSM who enjoy tying others up, or being tied up themselves, but who do not enjoy S&M--that is, they aren't interested in inflicting or receiving pain. Sometimes, one partner just ties up the other, as a form of foreplay. Similarly, there are many people who may like the psychological control they get from ordering their lovers to do things, but do not care for being physically restrained or tied, or for tying up their lovers

All right, so what is "BDSM"?

"BDSM" is an acronym of "B&D" (Bondage & Discipline), "D&S" (Dominance & Submission), and "S&M" (sadomasochism). "BDSM" refers to any or all of these things, and a lot of stuff besides.

Tying up your lover is BDSM; so is flogging that person, or bossing that person around, or any of a thousand other things. BDSM is highly erotic, usually (though not always) involves sex or sexual tension; and is highly psychologically charged. One person (the "submissive") agrees to submit to another person (the "dominant"); or, alternately, one person agrees to receive some sort of sensation, such as spanking, from another.

Some people like to be submissive all the time, some people like to be dominant all the time; some people like to switch, being submissive one day and dominant the next.

Many people practice some element of BDSM in their sexual lives without even being aware of it. They may think of "S&M" as "That sick stuff that people do with whips and cattle prods and stuff," yet still blindfold one another from time to time, or tie one another down and break out the whipped cream...

All of these things are "BDSM." BDSM is not necessarily hardcore sadomasochism; it can be remarkably subtle and sensual and soft. Pinning your partner to the bed and running silk or ice cubes or rabbit fur over your lover's body qualifies as "BDSM" (specifically, of a variety called "sensation play").

Nonsense--that just PROVES you aren't REALLY dominant or submissive!

And if you like both Cantonese and Thai cooking, it proves you don't REALLY have a taste for foreign cuisine, right?

The idea that if you are "really" dominant you can't also be submissive, or vice-versa, rests on the fallacy that these two things are opposed to one another, rather than two facets of the same thing. It also denies the basic and observable fact that human beings--or rather, some human beings--are complex, multi-dimensional creatures capable of a startling array of different emotional and philosophical responses.

Of course, I can't speak for everyone here; I've met some people so astonishingly shallow that a walk through the ocean of their souls would barely get your feet wet. But not everyone is like that.

There are people who are not shallow but who nevertheless do not have a submissive element or a masochistic element or a dominant element or whatever to their personalities, just as there are people  who are entirely straight, or people who are entirely gay, and do not have an element of bisexuality in their sexual orientation.

But often, the people I have seen most vocally decry the idea of switches are not these people; rather, the most vocal of the "one true way" contingent in the BDSM community is made up of the people who are most insecure.

For some people, their ego and their sense of self are tied up in their identity as a dominant or a submissive. This is particularly true of many dominants, who may use their dominance to shield a weak sense of self or a fragile ego. Suggesting to such a person that he or she may have elements of both dominance and submission, or even that other people can be both dominant and submissive, is very threatening. When your ego is protected by your sense that you are dominant and there is a clear, distinct difference between dominants and submissives, the notion of someone who switches is as threatening as the notion of bisexuality is to a person unsure of his sexual orientation.

But at the end of the day, the fact still remains that not everyone has an identity or a role which is so cut and dried. Many people (I suspect most people) who practice BDSM are capable of doing so from more than one direction. And that's a feature, not a bug.

SO HOW DOES IT WORK-YOU JUST FLIP FLOP ON COMMAND

I'm sure some people can do this; for me, it's much more complex than that.

I can't flip from being submissive to being dominant at the drop of a hat. I personally find that I tend to be highly submissive by nature, and that I derive great satisfaction from submitting to my lovers most of the time.

However, sometimes a need to be dominant will grow over a period of time, until I find myself deeply craving this domination and wanting to control to my partners. When this happens, it becomes very easy for me to dominate on an extremely deep level, and that this side of my personality is, during these times, at least as strong as my submissive side.

It tends not to happen overnight; generally speaking, I would say that I'm about 90% submissive and about 10% dominant. There may be a period of many months during which I am completely submissive, followed by hours of being entirely dominant. Were I to be entirely submissive all the time or entirely dominant all the time, I would unquestionably feel that something was missing from my life.

Yeah, but people who switch don't really understand true D/s.

Nonsense. In fact, one can easily argue that by exploring both roles, and being familiar with the headspace and psychological experience of both dominance and submission, a person can get a better grasp of the dynamic of power exchange--better, in fact, than the person who is familiar only with one part of it.

Of course, every human being has a unique experience, and the experience of one person never maps directly onto the experience of another. Nevertheless, we all share many psychological traits in common, and while I may not feel exactly what you feel when we are both submissive, my understanding of what it's like to be submissive--what the state of surrendering one's will to another feels like--can certainly help me to identify with you if I am dominating you--which in turn can help me to create an environment where I can put you in the state I want.

Well, it makes sense to me--after all, you can't be both dominant AND submissive!

Why not?

It's been my experience that there is no contradiction in the idea that you can gain satisfaction from taking both a dominant role and from a submissive role in a relationship, any more than there is a contradiction in the idea you can enjoy both cooking food and eating food.

A small but vocal minority of people in the BDSM community maintain--often at great and tiresome length--that anyone who can switch roles is not "really" into BDSM at all, that they're just "playing" at it and don't truly understand dominance or submission, and so forth.

Not only does this commit the fallacy of "one true wayism"--the mistaken belief that there is only one correct way to practice BDSM or engage in a D/s relationship--it also ignores the fact that human beings are capable of a very wide range of experiences and responses, and that many people for whom BDSM is more than mere bedroom tittilation do, in fact, have the capacity to experience BDSM from more than one perspective.

In fact, it's tempting to argue that a person who can experience a thing from many different perspectives--a person who can, for example, experience what it's like to be both deeply submissive and extremely dominant--probably has a better understanding of that thing than someone who can experience it only from one direction.

BDSM is not necessarily just about dominance and submission, either. Many folks are "bottoms," people who prefer to be given pain or other stimulation, but who do not give up psychologocal power or control; or "tops," people who take pleasure from inflicting pain orother sensation on their partners, but who are not interested in psychological control.

For me, being a switch encompasses both of these things as well. I am a sadist; that is, I take pleasure from inflicting consensual pain on my partners, provided they take pleasure from it as well. I am also a masochist; that is, I take pleasure from having consensual pain administered to me by a partner. Again, there is no contradiction here, any more than there is a contradiction between, say, taking pleasure from giving a massage and taking pleasure from receiving a massage.

Dominance, submission, masochism, and sadism are not bipolar opposites. A person can be both a masochist and a sadist, and can have both dominant and submissive personality traits. And none of these things is necessarily directly related to any other; you can be a sadist but not dominant, or a masochist but not submissive, or dominant but not sadistic, and so on

So what's a switch? What's with this whole switching thing?

 

What that means, in the simplest terms, is that the person is neither 100% dominant nor 100% submissive. Rather, they have a dominant side, and a submissive side, and at different times they explore different aspects of dominance and submission.

In some parts of the BDSM community, this is greeted with the same derision that might greet someone who says he or she is bisexual in certain corners of the gay and lesbian community--and, I think, for similar erroneous reasons.

The term "switch," like the term "bisexual," has a simple, functional definition: You are a switch if you engage at different times in BDSM practices from both a "top" or "dominant" role and from a "bottom" or "submissive" role, just as you are bisexual if you have lovers of both sexes.

Of course, a functional definition can't tell the whole truth, and a question of sexual identity may not be as straightforward as all that.

Be that as it may, there are people in the BDSM community who will make the preposterous statement that there aren't "really" any switches, just as there are people in the gay and lesbian communities who make the equally preposterous claim that there aren't "really" any bisexuals.

"How singular is the thing called pleasure, and how curiously
related to pain, which might be thought to be the opposite of
it; For they are never present to a man at the same instant, and
yet he who pursues either is generally compelled to take the other." --Plato

BDSM PEOPLE THAT I CAN LIVE WITHOUT

The "7th Level Antler-Headed Yak Boy (fourth house, nineteenth tax district)" types.

These are the guys (and they're almost always men) who form elaborate societies with intricate rules and protocols, and give themselves incredibly flowery titles (which they insist on using to refer to themselves, and may insist that others use as well) to boot.

There's nothing wrong with any of that. The problem comes from the idea that once you've mastered someone's list of rules, probably yanked from some old pulp science-fiction novel, that you've mastered all the intricities of domination and submission, and you're now fit to rule the world or some damn thing. You haven't; you've just memorized someone else's rules. D/s is arguably one of the most complex forms of all human relationships, and it's different for everyone--something that works for one person doesn't apply to another. Mastering one set of protocols no more makes you an expert than mastering macaroni and cheese makes you a five-star chef.

The pathologically insecure.

These people often refer to themselves exclusively as "Master (or Mistress) Thus-and Such," and are more than happy to describe you exactly, in great deal, how and why they've mastered the fine art of BDSM, and why you should be grateful to sit at their feet and pick up such crumbs of arcane knowledge they see fit to provide.

Disagree with them, even about something minor, and the entire elaborate facade built to protect their insecurities comes crashing down. You have not seen histronics until you've suggested to such a person that perhaps there's some element of D/s he hasn't considered.

Hint: Being a master is like being enlightened. If you have to tell people that you are--you aren't.

The Domly Doms.

These guys--and again, they're almost always guys--self-identify as alpha males; they strut, they preen, they impress one another with the size of their stables of submissives. Their submissives never stick around for long; the stables rotate, because at the end of the day, interspecies dating never works. It's just too damn hard for a human submissive to maintain a romance with a peacock.

A closely related subspecies to the Domly Dom:

The Misogynist Dom

These ones are usually pretty easy to spot. They treat all women as "natural" submissives, sometimes with a lengthy and elaborate rationalization from pop evolutionary psychology. They fancy the notion of seeing two women getting it on, as long as there are no other guys involved (because as we all know, sex between women doesn't "really" count). And, just as the cherry of lame on the top of the sundae of general misogyny, they sometimes claim that they do what they do from a sense of obligation to "protect" women, the poor frail dears.

Some of these guys wrap themselves up into a coccoon of creepy and metamorphose, Kafka-like, into the next species:

The Downright Dangerous

These guys (invariably guys, in my experience) fancy themselves the Movers and the Shakers of the BDSM community. They often try to gravitate toward positions of leadership or respect, seeking the validation of others for their status.

Whereas the more garden-variety misogynist doms tend to play the same note again and again, these guys strike a full chord of poor behavior, often including ignoring the limits and boundaries of those luckless to play with them...because, you see, they know better than the women they play with. They often have experience that's broad but not deep...because a lot of submissives won't play with them a second time.

The completely unsocialized.

These are the ones who can make a convention of stereotypical computer nerds point and say "Damn, those people have poor social skills!" (And yes, I know that the stereotypes of computer nerds are quite often wrong.)

Many of these guys lead one to suspect that they're part of the community because no other community'll have them.

Hint: I understand foot fetishes as much as the next guy, but do not walk up to me and, without introduction, ask me to take off my shoes. Especially if you don't know my sexual orientation and you're a guy. What's that, you say? There's nothing sexual about feet? Well, guess what--anything that arouses you or gets you off is an intimate act, even if, in a different context, it might be completely benign.

The One True Wayers.

These are usually the people in "TPE" (total power exchange) relationships--people who live acting out a full-time master/slave relationship, who sneer at the "players"--namely, those who don't live their entire lives in their roles--and especially those who (oh, dear God) switch roles.

Hint: If you predicate the whole of your romantic relationship, and indeed the whole of your life, along a single axis, don't think even for half a second that you have a deeper understanding of D/s than those whose experience is broader and whose palettes are wider. You want to live in a master/slave relationship? Hey, that's cool, whatever turns you on. You want to think that gives you a better understanding of the right way to do it? Go sit in the back of the bus with the Baptists, the fundamentalist Muslims, and all the other yahoos who think there's only one right way to live.

The You-Don't-Existers.

These folks are a peculiar subspecies of One True Wayers. Like the One True Wayers, they believe there is a single "correct" way to "do" BDSM; unlike the One True Wayers, they feel that those who do things otherwise aren't just doing it wrong...they dont actually exist at all.

For example, many you-don't-existers will say things like "People can not be both dominant and submissive. Switches may top or bottom, but switches are not both dominant and submissive." If confronted by someone wo says "I am both dominant and submissive," the you-don't-existers will often merely dismiss such a person as deluded, or a liar, or undecided, or lacking self-knowledge.

The Wannabe Doms.

You can find these people all over the Internet--and, for a change, they're not mostly men. These people appear to be equal-opportunity offenders, and I've encountered about as many women as men who fall into this role.

These are the ones who believe that because they consider themselves dominant, the rest of the world should too. Many of them are often poorly socialized as well, which is quite a double-whammy.

You can spot 'em right away. They're the ones who, upon learning that someone is a submissive, immediately demand that that person be submissive to them. They're the ones who open a conversation with a submissive they've only just met with "You will call me Master and you will learn to worship me." They seem to see submissives as commodities, not as people, and begin every encounter with the idea that every submissive in the world will submit to them because, hey, they're Doms, right?

Hint: Respect is earned, not automatic. If you want a submissive to respect you, first prove that you deserve it. The people you see in the community, the people you see at play parties, who command widespread respect? They earned it. And by the way, just because someone is a submissive, that does not automatically mean he or she should submit to you. If you don't even know this person's name and have not yet established any kind of relationship whatsoever with this person, assuming you deserve this person's submission is a bit premature, wanker. Submissives exist for more than your own fantasy fulfillment!

The Desperate Subbies.

These are the flip side of the wannabe doms--the people who're so desperate to find a dominant that they'll stick anyone into that slot. Upon learning that someone is a dom, the Desperate Subbiess immediately assume that this person will automatically want to dominate them, and will run up to anyone they see who even remotely looks the least little bit dominant with "Oh, Master, I'm desperate to serve you!"

In some extreme cases, these people cross the line from annoying to outright self-destructive, as they'll sometimes abandon even basic concerns for safety and self-preservation in their attempts to find someone, anyone, to dominate them. Fortunately, Desperate Subbies are rare, and can be spotted from a mile away. Unfortunately, Desperate Subbies occasionally become statistics.

Hint: The relationship between a dominant and a submissive is a partnership. Even when it's a transient partnership, like at a play party, it's still a partnership. Don't go pledging your submission to someone until after you've determined that he or she is interested in you, and for God's sake, don't go pledging your submission to someone you don't even know, or to everyone you meet who seems the least bit interested in you. Dominants are people, not fantasy fulfillment objects...and every now and then, a person who calls himself a dominant isn't actually a dominant at all, but a predator who sees you as the prey, you know? Getting to know someone before you submit to him or her is a very good strategy to avoid becoming a statistic.

Bondage and restraint

Note: This is not intended as a "safe-sex" site. There are plenty of those available elsewhere on the Web. The focus of this page is narrower; it's intended as a general, common-sense safety guide for newcomers to BDSM.

Is very curious as to why many have added me to there admirers list yet have never uttered a word to me and most likely will never meet me as they live in another country

IS A VERY HAPPY SLAVE

MASTERS HOME AND ME GETS LOTS AND LOTS OF CUDDLES

This slave is feeling really down tonight

Saw Master of on a plane to LA today, I know its only been a few hours but miss Him so very very very much already.

This week is going to be a real struggle being so far apart.

MASTER SLAVE IS COUNTING THE SECONDS TILL YOU RETURN

HAS JUST REALISED THE WORD OK LOOKS LIKE A KIDS STICK FIGURE DRAWING IF YOU TILT YOUR HEAD TO THE SIDE

~ Common Mistakes New People Make ~
Unknown Author
The number one mistake I see made by those new to D/s is thinking there is a right and a wrong way to go about playing. While there are some safety rules that should be followed, the only people who make the rules are the ones involved in the scene or relationship. If anyone else tells you that you are doing this wrong, tell them to mind their own business.

Another common mistake is rushing into things. I know that after years and years of suppressing this desire it is very hard to take it slow when you finally find out you aren't the only one that gets turned on by bondage. But rushing to dominate or submit to another without taking the time to get to know some skills, and each other, is a recipe for pain... that is the bad kind, not the good. When you first get started, take the time to read the literature, join a local organization, and get to know the person you will be playing with.

A mistake I often see new subs make is submitting to anyone and everyone who calls themselves a dominant. Just because someone sticks "Master", "Mistress", "Dom" or "Domme" in their screen name doesn't mean you have to call them "sir" or "ma'am" or submit to their demands. For the most part, a reputable, experienced dominant knows this and will not demand unearned respect. New dominants are sometimes guilty of this. If someone hasn't earned your respect, why would you act like they have?

Another mistake inexperienced subs often make is in setting limits. Some make too many limits, and this will sometimes frustrate or scare off the dominant. Much more common is a new sub setting too few limits. They feel they will not be desirable or "sub" enough if they have limits. Take some time to think about what truly squicks you... what you do not under any circumstances want to experience at present, and make this act a limit. If a potential Dom/me won't agree to a certain limit, walk away. Of course, your limits will change as you become more experienced. What you won't submit to this year, you may crave the next.

Something else I have seen is the "Dom/me is always right" syndrome. The joke is there are two rules in D/s:

The Dom/me is always right
If the Dom/me is wrong, refer to Rule #1
That's what it is, too... just a joke. Dom/mes are human and are sometimes wrong. It isn't a sin against the D/s gods to respectfully suggest to your Dom/me that s/he may be wrong... especially if it involves a safety issue. Just because you are a sub doesn't mean you check your brain at the door. If you are the dominant and make a mistake, don't be afraid to admit it and apologize. It won't make you any less "domly".

Finally, many newbies think that the Dom/me's pleasure is the only thing that matters. Sure, as a sub it is your job to please your Dom/me, but it should please you as a sub, also. We play these games to make everyone happy. While there may be times you do something to please your Dom/me that you don't enjoy, if you find yourself doing this consistently you are probably with the wrong partners.

Characteristics of a Slave



A slave is strong, not strong like a man, but strong inside. Her character is that of wanting to please. She serves because it is pleasure to her. She has the inner strength to go places inside herself that her Master guides her. She cannot be weak emotionally, or these places could push her over the edge.

A slave is respectful. The first portion of respect is SELF-respect. If a slave does not respect herself, then no one else will either. Self-respect most probably includes self-esteem, taking care of herself mentally emotionally as well as physically. Self-respect could include such things as getting enough sleep, eating right, etc. A slave shows respect to her Master by carrying out His orders as he wishes. She shows respect to her Master and others by being polite, mannerly,
and pleasant.

A slave is loyal to her Master's wishes. She is also loyal to herself.
A slave should never do anything that is against her own moral standings. She also will never allow another to touch her in ways that would be displeasing to her Master. She knows who owns her and thrives in his ownership.

A slave is open and honest. She holds nothing back, revealing all
that she is to her Master. Openness and honesty lead to better communication, allowing her Master to do the job he should, and to know what responsibilities he takes on. Her openness allows Him also to be more open, thus building trust between them and a deeper submission of the slave.

Spirit is difficult to describe. A slave must have spirit. I don't speak of spiritedness, as that is different. Spiritedness is feisty and bratty. Spirit refers more to a brightness emanating from within. It is a light in her eyes, visible to a few...those who understand her slaveheart.

A slave needs to be intelligent. Serving includes the mind as well as the body. She needs to be able to challenge her Master mentally. To please Him and with her thoughts, ideas, and input on things he wishes. She needs to be able to understand His instructions and to carry on a conversation on a multitude of topics, as they cannot
always be 'in scene'

Being a slave is not always easy. Keeping a sense of humor
when things seem insurmountable is paramount to focusing on
her submission. It also helps to balance the darkness of her desires
at times.

A slave finds peace and contentment in serving her Master. She is a reflection of Him. She is his property, his possession, his responsibility. A slave shows focus, always keeping her Master in the forefront of her mind. As she goes about her day, she uses her own intelligence and strength to do things in ways that are pleasing to her Master.

I am a slave because it is in my soul to be. I find pleasure in the pleasing of another. I thrive on another's direction, control, and presence in my life, and soul. Being a slave is not something I choose to be, it is simply who and what I am. It is my desire to serve a Master, to find the strength, courage, openness, honesty, etc that it takes to be a good slave.

Submission

To Submit: ...to overcome resistance to direction and yield one(self) to the will of another




Submission is an action of personal strength. To overcome internal resistance the submissive must control their desire or need to maintain personal control in the creation and delivery of all personal decisions. They must overcome the need to express or deliver their personal judgment as the basis for creating, directing and taking self action. They must overcome their desire to ACT defensively through CHALLENGE and directed conflict when exposed to the direction of another. As part of this process they must also submerge their ego to allow them to follow or accept direction from another without fear of loss of face, status or worth.

To yield is to 'reward' through the offering of the inner self to the direction or will of another. This 'gift' is the non-resistance or need of conflict TO direction and external control.

Resistance is usually based on FEAR of loss. That loss may be the perception of ego or self, loss of control, loss of independence, loss of status and loss of perceived personal value or worth.

There are some 'new' submissives who believe that they need a 'strong' Dominant to conquer or externally overcome their resistance to direction and control. This implies an action of external 'force' upon the submissive. A violent, compulsion or constraint exerted AGAINST a person. Such an action implies that the (self) of the submissive is not consenting to direction but in fact resisting or overtly acting in opposition to the acceptance of voluntary direction by another person. Non-consensual FORCE violates one of the primary tenants of the BDSM community and factually negates that the 'submissive' is voluntarily submitting at all.

The identification of 'strong' Dominant and the inability of a submissive to find one who meets these self-created unattainable standards allows the submissive to evade taking the internal actions necessary to control themselves in order to offer themselves truly in submission.

A person who actively RESISTS direction or control is NOT submitting. Acting out with resistance is a demonstration that the individual has NOT overcome their internal resistance to external direction and control.

Some submissives believe that by yielding or 'rewarding' access to their physical body that they are offering to the recipient of that 'reward' their submission. To reward access WITHOUT yielding your inner (self) or ego to the voluntary acceptance of the will of another is NOT submission. It is to role play submission on the surface without real meaning or depth in the exchange. Such an offering is shallow and quite limited. Again this is often an action of defense based on fear of loss of control or exposure of emotional or mental vulnerability by the submissive.

Part of overcoming the defensive structures inside the mind of the submissive is the absolute necessity of the submissive to overcome their FEAR of releasing control to another.

Some submissives do not wish to release or submerge their egos through voluntary submission instead desiring to shift responsibility for their submission to a forcible or non-voluntary IMPOSITION of submission upon them thereby allowing them to save 'face' and shift the BLAME of their submission to the person who had IMPOSED that condition or state upon them.

Submission CANNOT be imposed. Control CAN be imposed or FORCED. Often through tools of intimidation, fear, pain, guilt or shame. We call this IMPOSITION of FORCE - ABUSE! This is a non-consensual action.

A submissive cannot escape personal responsibility for their submission. They must overcome the societal implications of perceived weakness of character and perverse or corrupt moral standards on their own. A submissive must overcome their feelings of shame and guilt for taking direct voluntary actions against the 'accepted' role of the 'independent successful human adult' as defined by the standards of outer society. It is important to consider that shame and guilt are tools used by religions, governments and communities to impose censure and through that censure CONTROL members of the community who no longer believe or follow the often rigid and limiting acceptable path of an adult within that community.

You punish the unusual through shunning, disparagement and expressed direct shame or humiliation. Any individual who defies or is able to ignore societal rules or controls becomes dangerous and perceived to be potentially beyond the control of that society. Such defiance causes FEAR.

The acknowledgement and acceptance of TOTAL responsibility for the submission of the self within is the first TRUE step that a submissive takes toward total submission and the offering of the self to the will and direction of another.

Advice for the novice submissive



I'veve put together a list of what I consider to be essential thoughts. These are in no particular order and it's rather long.

1) The only rule is: Do Not Harm. This means mentally or physically. Any other rules you choose to accept you get to thoroughly own.

2) There is not a rule book that has been distributed to everyone else and missed you. Anybody who tells you how D/s is done is blowing smoke up your butt. There are as many variations to this lifestyle as there are people in this world. You do not have to accept someone else's version of this lifestyle.

3) Before you are contracted or collared to someone, you make your own decisions. It is perfectly okay to not do what a Dominant tells you to before you are collared or contracted to that Dominant. Matter of fact, I would recommend not obeying every schmuck that comes along calling himself a Dominant. Find out for yourself if he's a Dominant, and then obey if you are so inclined.

4) Before you contract to a Dominant or become collared by a Dominant: NEGOTIATE! This is your time to lay out your hard limits along with yours and his expectations about the relationship. If your expectation is that it will be a monogamous relationship and his expectation is for it to be an open or poly relationship it's best to find out before you commit. This is also a good time to ask questions like: A) What happens if I get pregnant? B) What happens if I move across the country for you, quit my job for you and you release me, abuse me, or make me so miserable I want to cut my heart out with a plastic spoon? C) Are we having unprotected sex and if so, may I see the certificate from the doctor regarding your HIV and STD tests? Put all this writing and both of you sign it. It won't mean squat in a court of law, but it will cover your butt in the case of arguments.

5) Safety, Safety, Safety. Dead subsmissives don't serve. Use your head. If a Dominant is about to do something to you that can cause you harm, speak up and possibly get out. There are a lot of inexperienced players out there that believe the Sleeping Beauty Books are real.

6) There will be a lot of people proclaiming that they are Dominants and Masters to you. Some of them are wonderful, incredible people, some are full of crap, some of them are looking for easy sex, and some of them are down right delusional. Understand that actions will always speak louder than words. I can proclaim myself the Queen of the United States and then demand that all of you send me your taxes so I can quit my job and build a 1600sf $5million house in Laguna Beach, but you're not going to do it, right? Be aware that there are people that search out novices because they know that they can take advantage of you.

7) There is always someone out there that will appreciate what you bring to the table. Don't change who you are to suit somebody else, simply because they say so. Men out number women in the scene 3 to 1. So, there are a lot of fish in the sea. Don't settle for someone that doesn't fit you.

There is a difference between domineering and Dominant. Webster's Dictionary says: Dominant - ruling or prevailing, Domineering - harsh, arrogant, tyrannizing, overbearing. Dominants shouldn't feel the need to be bullies. If someone does act that way...run away....fast.

9) Get yourself a mentor. Mentors DO NOT play or have sexual relations with the submissive they are mentoring. Mentors are there to teach protocol, to protect and to guide. This means you should get a mentor in your own community, not some online guy half way around the world. The reason is simple; if my Master were your mentor and you came to him and said, "I have been asked to play by Dom XXXX." Master would tell you no. Why? Because the guy has put at least 2 women in the hospital and was actually taken to court by an ex-submissive. We know this because we live in the same geographic area as Dom XXXX. Some guy in Chicago would not know this.

10) You do not have to call every Dominant "Sir" or "Master". If you want to call every Dominant "Sir" then do it. If you don't, then don't do it.

11) There are people that will tell you that you're not submissive. Many will do it in hopes that they can goad you into doing what they want in your effort to prove that you are submissive. Bottom line, until they've met you face to face...it's just cyberspace.

12) We're in this lifestyle because it makes us happy. If you take it too seriously, you will take all the fun out of it. Have a sense of humor.

When it comes to meeting Dominants:
1) Meet on your turf. Some place you're familiar with, in public with a well lit parking lot. I usually made it coffee at the local coffeehouse or drinks at a bar where conversations were possible. I would NEVER EVER meet somebody at a hotel or their home. I didn't do dinners because a) it's not easy extricate yourself if it's going miserably and sometimes people that buy dinner think they've bought you.

2) Never get into his car, even at the end of the evening. I also wouldn't recommend allowing him to walk you to your car. A string of rapes happened in the LA community where the "Dom" pushed the submissive into either his car or her car.

3) Get caller ID blocking on your phone and you call him. Preferably on his home phone number. I generally would not continue with anyone that refused to give me their home phone or lied about whether the number they gave me was their home phone. You can check to see if it's a cell phone by using Reverse Directory. It will tell you if a phone number is assigned to a cell phone company.

4) Wear whatever you want and are comfortable in. Until you are contracted or collared to that Dominant what you wear is your choice. I used to make a point of wearing either jeans or my business clothes to the first meeting. I did this because these pieces of clothing reflect who I am, if he can't accept that, then he's obviously not the person for me.

5) Be wary of people that start conversation off with: "Are you submissive?" " How large are your breasts?" "Do you like anal sex?" "What are your limits?" My general rule of thumb is that if the first thing they ask me is about sex or my submission, they're more interested in what I am, versus who I am. Anybody who focuses purely on the sexual part of your life will most likely only be there for the sex. If this is all you're looking for, fantastic. But, if you're looking for long term, this most likely is not the person for you.

6) I always made it perfectly clear that there would be no sex or S&M on the first meeting. In fact, there probably wouldn't be sex or S&M for the 3 to 5 dates. This is the stage where I'm still determining if I even like them, never mind trust them with my life. If a Dominant was unwilling to wait until I was comfortable, I wouldn't meet them. After all, I like to think I'm worth the wait.

7) Have a safe call. But, I do it differently than most. I usually told my meetings that I had an hour or so to meet them, and then I had plans with friends. After an hour was up, I would call a friend that I had made arrangements with. At that point, I would either tell her that I was on my way or was running a little late and would call when I left. The deal was that "a little late" was 30 minutes. If she did not hear from me 30 minutes later she was to call my cell phone. If I was in trouble I answered with a pre-arranged sentence.

Use common sense. The same idiosyncrasies exist in the D/s BDSM realm as the vanilla realm. This means that if you act like a one night stand, you probably will be a one night stand. If you cry to everyone about how he used you and never called again....some subs will try to comfort you, some subs will wonder what the hell you expected and some Doms will send you tons of email because you,re obviously easy.

9) I really don't recommend quitting your job and moving across the country to become someone's live in 24/7 slave/submissive without a concrete plan on how to extricate yourself in case it doesn't work out. Think about how difficult it would be to get out of that situation with no money and no support network.

10) I believe that the absolute best way to meet people is to be active in your local BDSM D/s group. Attend munches, volunteer as help for fetish events, be involved. This serves two purposes. It gives you a local support network and allows you to get a better idea of the reputations of the people out there. Unfortunately, asking for references can be faked in this day and age. Knowing the community is the best way to learn if someone is safe.

11) If they've lied about age, height, weight, or whether they have ubmissives or a wife, I would just drop it right there. Lying about the first three shows me that they're willing to lie about something insubstantial, which makes me worry about how easy it would for them to lie about the big stuff. The second two shows me that they're willing to lie to the most important people in their lives, and they would not hesitate to lie to me too. This is a lifestyle based on trust and if I'm going to put my life your hands, goddammit I have to be able to trust you.

This is all that I can think of at the moment. I'm sure others will have additions to the list. I'm sure some will feel the need to flame me. Please understand these are my thoughts and practices that have come about through my experiences. You mileage may vary.

Thoughts on Submission



While there is no "generic submissive", submissives seem to share
some traits. Among them are a desire to please and the strength to
release control to another. Some do not understand this need and
desire and feel they are different. Some feel there is something wrong with having these feelings. They watch others around them and wonder why they don't seem to share or understand the desires they feel. For some, this desire to please and release control is hidden because feeling different is uncomfortable. If they discover that there is a lifestyle that embraces their desires, they will find an understanding that can soothe them. Many do not find that understanding until they are encumbered with relationships or family. They find the understanding of their desires, but find themselves unable to live them. Finding that one isn't alone in feeling these desires is comforting. Being unable to live them becomes very confining. Some find an outlet, some do not.


For those fortunate enough to discover that they aren't alone and have the freedom to explore their desires, other challenges await them. They feel they have something special to offer in a relationship, but whom should they offer it to. Will they be safe? Who should they trust?



Meeting other submissives with similar needs and desires creates
another problem. They discover that others are living their desires and dreams and the discussions between them create a deep need to experience the same sensations that their newfound friend is enjoying. This stage can create a frenzy so intense, that core values and common sense are forgotten, just to feel what has been racing through their mind. It is the most dangerous time a submissive will ever face. It is a time for friends to step forward and offer advice and caution.



Once a submissive has safely passed through the frenzy of discovery and exploration, it becomes time to begin the search for a partner that can understand their needs and desires and meet them. This is not an easy task. There will be errors in judgment, bad decisions, and even the possibility of mental and/or physical harm. If a submissive will take responsibility for their own safety, the potential harm can be minimized or eliminated. Often, this is simply a function of refusing to rush into meetings and encounters until a level of rapport and trust has been established. Setting forth their core values, as well as their needs, desires, and fantasies, adds a balance to early meetings. If the values and desires are consistent between the potential partners there is a possibility that both will find happiness.



Once a submissive finds a Master, a new set of challenges appears.
Both must be prepared to accept these new challenges and work
together to conquer them. They will discover that a submissive's life is filled with questions and doubts followed by moments of crystal clarity of purpose. The times of questions and doubts will return often, with clarity returning as questions and doubts are resolved. A wise and responsible Master will quickly answer questions and move to resolve doubts. As trust builds, the times of questions and doubts will lessen as the times of crystal clarity lengthen. There will always be questions and doubts, but building trust through continuing openness and communication, combined with honesty and patience, can diminish the negative impact on the relationship. It just takes work… every day... but for those willing to make the effort, the rewards ARE your dreams come true.

The Healthy Submissive


"Discipline gives total freedom;
it allows you to go beyond your limitations, to break through boundaries and reach the highest goal. The path to discipline will not only save a person's life, it will also give it meaning. How? By introducing him to deeper joys and deeper longings, by creating a silence in which the whisper of the heart can be heard. Truly, discipline is the road to liberation."
--Gurumayi Chidvilasananda


In this discussion, I will be talking primarily about the female heterosexual submissive, because I don't know enough about non-heterosexual female submissives and Dominants to know whether this analysis is completely applicable. This focus is not to suggest that lesbian female submissives and their challenges are less worthy of study, merely that I am not equipped at this time to do such a study. So often, women who are newly aware of their submissive needs endure a period of self doubt around the troubling question: am I sick? I've seen women read the psychiatric diagnostic manual (DSM-IV) and then ask, "do I have borderline personality disorder?"

I am writing here not ONLY about the sexual aspects: "am I sick because I get turned on by images of being taken, used, forced, swept away by masculine energy more powerful than my own?"; I am also writing about the nonsexual aspects of being submissive: "am I sick because I yearn to depend on, and follow the lead of, a man stronger than myself?"

I will attempt to address both aspects in this essay.

What precisely fuels this kind of question, "am I sick?" Why would a woman discovering the language of her nature think she has a mental disorder? Or at the very least, have something very wrong with her?

A submissive discovers, or more properly, realizes and acknowledges that she functions AT HER BEST in relation to another. And the more intimate, holding, containing that relationship, the better she feels and the better she performs in cardinal areas of adult life: work, friendships, and parenting. Realizing she is at her best in such relation makes her wonder why she can't do it for herself? Why does she need such a relationship to accomplish what she should be able to do for herself?

In thinking about this, I have come to question the cultural determinants of what is considered the highest good. Here in Western society, we place highest value on independence, on "pull yourself up by the bootstraps", on the lone pioneer, the trailblazer, the less needy and more self sufficient. We value competition over cooperation, tangible acheivement over acheivement in relationship. We pay big bucks to men (and the few women) who run big corporations, and less to the nursery school teachers, the nurses, the secretaries, the social workers, the caregivers rather than the producers.

There is something wrong with believing that such independence is the only good. It is especially wrong for the most relatedness-oriented among us, the submissive female.

Part of the newly aware submissive's task is to separate out the internalized voices of her culture: those voices that tell her she is too needy, too dependent, too focused on the others in her life. Once she can articulate what those voices tell her, she can begin to question not HERSELF, but the validity of those internalized values, using her own yardstick to measure her life, rather than our culture's standard.

We can see how perspective is critical in understanding a phenomenon. In a study of moral development in children, for example, Dr. Robert Coles, in a study of moral development in children, researched how children decide what is good and right. To do this, he presented several scenarios describing a moral or ethical dilemma, presented the scenario to school age children, and analyzed the results. The description of the study here is to illustrate the nature of cultural bias and it's impact on individuals.

One of Dr. Cole's scenarios was as follows:
A man has a very, very sick wife, so sick she could die if she doesn't get a particular, very expensive medicine. The man doesn't have the money for the medicine, so in desperation he steals it from a pharmacy.

The children are asked questions about this scenario. Coles found that boys tended to conclude that the man should be punished, because the law is the law, and nobody should break the law. Coles saw this as a higher order of moral reasoning, reflecting the statement, "a nation of laws, not of men." That is, that nobody is above the law, and the rule of law is not situationally defined. The boys applied an abstract universal principle to a singular instance. Coles understood this ability to transcend the personal as a "more evolved" form of moral development.

The girls were deeply troubled by the scenario, and most of them sought ways to solve the man's problem within the context of relatedness: they wondered if the man could ask the pharmacist for the medicine, and offer to work for him to pay for it, or pay him back later. They wondered if the man had friends who could help him pay for the medicine, and they believed he shouldn't be punished for his act of desperation. Their sense of right was situational, and defined within the context of relatedness. They did not come to articulate an abstract universal principle, but sought to solve the problem within the context presented. Coles saw this as a less logical, lower order of moral development because the girls could not emotionally distance themselves from the central human drama in the scenario.

After Coles' work was published a woman named Carol Gilligan reviewed the studies that Cole had done and reanalyzed them, in a book called, "In a Different Voice." Rather than seeing the boys' responses as evidence of "higher" development and the girls' as "lower" she redefined them as different. And she pointed out that the girls responses, so firmly rooted in human context and relatedness were dam I good or bad?) on factors outside herself. The female submissive defines herself based on what others tell her she is.

Parents have enormous responsibility with such an influenceable child. Nascent talents can either be nurtured or aborted with just a word. This child will likely live up, or down to, whatever is expected of her. Expect more than she can constitutionally do (like academic, athletic, or social success) and she will develop an intense sense of inferiority. Praise her out of proportion to her talents (this is the BEST drawing any child EVER did) and she will develop an inflated sense of self. Accurately and sensitively validate her real abilities and talents, and she will seek goals appropriate to her ability, and take pleasure in acheiving them.

When the environment is reality based, sensitive, and balanced, the child grows up embracing her special ability to be "related" to others, to be sensitive, and has a sense of self in reasonable tune with her true abilities and vulnerabilities, neither excessively self effacing or self aggrandizing.

But if development should go awry, as it too often does for this child, the personality traits she has develop in a distorted manner, and cause her difficulties.

In dysfunctional families, this child suffers more than others with tougher hides, less reactive temperments. She is often the one singled out for physical, sexual or emotional abuse. Her very nature makes her available for use: for the parent's angers, frustrations, sexual impulses, or narcissistic gratification.

When a submissive child is misused in this fashion, she is unable to utilize her interpersonal talents in a constructive way. She must either develop rigid defenses that constrain her ability to be flexible as an adult, or be blown about by the winds of other's emotions all her life, or become stuck in what are popularly called, "co-dependent relationships."

Women who emerge from childhood with these traits will be more or less consciously submissive in that they are STILL moldable, controllable by others. Those who don't consciously seek a Dominant partner will naturally gravitate to a man who influences, controls her in a benevolent manner. Who accepts her, loves her, nurtures her, and values her sensitivity.

Those who consciously seek a Dominant partner are those who are perhaps, so sensitive that they require not only benevolence, but someone who understands PRECISELY how moldable and influenceable they are, and is capable of using the power to mold her and influence her deliberately and consciously, for her good and the good of the relationship.

In that kind of relationship, the submissive is freed to be all of herself. She is safe enough to feel her exquisitely sensitive reactions to others, to play like a child, to give care and to take care, to be angry, to lose shame.

There is a strength beyond measure in self knowledge and acceptance. There is freedom in jettisoning shame, in letting go of "shoulds."

To know oneself as a submissive woman, to accept that it is neither the terrible thing that society tells us it is, nor the only right and true way to be for OTHERS, is to be free. What is, is.

There are two kinds of strengths: the strength to lead, and the strength to follow; the strength to control, and the strength to yield. There are two kinds of power: the power to strip another's soul bare, and the power to stand naked.

Do not mistake following for weakness, for it is not. Do not mistake yielding for weakness, for in yielding there is resilience. Do not mistake the submissive's need for relatedness for inability to be alone.

Submissive women are not weaklings. They are sensitive people who have a great deal of resilience in the face of their particular challenges.

Submissiveness is a strength seeking a proper context

The beginning

She settles making herself comfortable. A hot chocolate and a few biscuits on a small tray beside her, her dog curled up at her feet. The house is silent as everyone has retired for the night. The girl enjoys the quiet, and really enjoys this time where she gets to converse with her Master, and spend some special time before retiring to bed

She takes a sip off the hot chocolate and switches on her laptop, as she waits for it to load her mind wanders back over the years to where this all began. Back over time and space to a period perhaps 10 years or more earlier.

She was broken, damaged, scared and lonely, this woman yet still very much a girl had got out off a bad relationship, one that had almost killed her as she attempted to escape. Her therapist who was helping her had suggested joining an online support group. At first she was unsure but soon discovered talking with others who had been through this helped. It also helped her to pass the days as she had become almost house bound due to her injuries and trust issues.

One day she had logged onto her support group to find no one online so bored had decided to browse the other chat sites that had come up when she first logged on.

At first she stayed in the main chat rooms such as the Australian room or the just chat rooms, but soon became more adventourous and began to stroll the user created rooms stumbling one day quiet by acciddent on one named Master/slave. Her eyes widened as she saw things that she didnt understand, but at the same time intrigued her and held her spellbound unable to take her eyes off the screen in front off her. The woman became moist and quiet wet as she read posts of people being whipped, her heart would flutter and skip a beat as she read about kneeling and serving, yes it was all roleplay but for the first time in her life this girl felt she had found what was missing in her life, she wanted to be graceful and beautiful like these slaves before her. So she sat she observed she watched (but in her heart still believed she was nothing that none would ever want something broken and damaged). Her insecurities meant she would flee and log off if anyone spoke to her, but slowely over time as she couldnt stay away for long she began to chat with others and eventually took the coller of a Dominant (it felt safe as it was only roleplay and words on a screen).

The girl did this over a few years having quiet a few Dominants not knowing that a coller was for life but there was still something missing she just didnt know what.

Eventually one of the Dominants decided to take it further and she began to talk to Him over the phone and via web cam and He began to get the girl to do real time tasks for Him via webcam . But still there was something missing something that was not right, she began to question why she could only call at certain times, why the web cam would suddenly go black. Yes the girl was being used, she was the secret affair nothing more heartbroken she left Him and searched for another.

The girl had a few disasters but eventually found one she was comfortable with and they started a relationship, they spoke everyday both online and via phone( she racked up high phonebills as He was in America). The girl loved to serve Him and she served with love but still something was missing there was a hole in her life a emptyness.

The girl realised she needed to experience this lifestyle in real time and truely find out if it was for her. With trembling heart she told Him her needs, but there was a problem, her health meant she could not relocate to Him and He was a truck driver so didnt have the finances to relocate to her so they parted company.

A friend suggested the girl try collerme so eagely she created a profile but ddnt really expect anything as she believed she was to ugly to damaged. Naively she jumped at the first person who showed her any attention. A mistake she lives with everyday, and stupidly let Him come to her house in the middle off the night, only to discover He only wished to get ah her children.

Angry and disollusioned she kept looking meeting a few but never finding that connection or spark.

About to give up she was approached by a Dominant who said He would give her some real time experience, teaching and training they talked for quiet awhile many weeks before she agreed to meet.

The girl didnt expect a relationship to develop just something real to help her in her long term search.

Her heart skipped a beat as she saw He was online it was 2 years latter and she was His in total and forever never to be seperated not even by death

This slave got to try wax play last night for the first time.

It was scary as even though i had researched it still doesnt tell you what to expect personally, yet at the same time so excited.

The different sensations heat, dripping and then the contractions as the wax hardened bombarded my mind, so can't wait to try it again.

THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU MASTER

SLAVE KNOWS SHE IS VERY SPOILT

Today its two wonderful years since i met Master and my birthday going to be a fantastic day

sings happy birthday to myself

Am approaching two wonderful years since i first took the courage to step offline and meet my Master face to face. Its hard to believe how much has changed since I took those first tentative and very nervous steps into a world i had only read and dreamt about.

Im not going to lie there were difficult times where i questioned my worth and if i would ever be good enough  and where i had to  be taught things that i thought i knew.

As what i had experienced online was nothing like real time and was all role play and fantasy . I  also had to deal with some serious health issues and Master had to deal with issues with His mums health both a stressful time, but drawing me closer and closer to what a wonderful man Master truely is

THE ONE FLAW IN SUBMISSIVE WOMEN:

By the time the Lord made submissive woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"

And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart-and she will do everything with only two hands."

The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."

"But I won't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."

The angel moved closer and touched the submissive woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.

The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the submissive woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"

"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."

The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Submissive woman is truly amazing."

And she is! Submissive women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.

Submissive women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a submissive woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends.

Submissive women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN SUBMISSIVE WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH

DECEMBER 14

My dear darling John,
Who ever in the world would dream of getting a partridge and putting him in a pear tree? Thank you for such a sweet romantic gift.
Love always,
Janet


DECEMBER 15

Dearest John,
Today the postman brought your very sweet gift. The Two turtle doves are just adorable. I love them.
Loving you ,
Janet



DECEMBER 16

Dear John,
aren't you the extravagant one. Now I must protest. I don't deserve such generosity, three french hens. They are just darling. But I must insist. You've been too kind.
All my love,
Janet


DECEMBER 17

Dear John,
Today the postman delivered four calling birds. Now, they really are beautiful, but, don't you think enough is enough? You are being way too romantic.
Afectonately,
Janet

DECEMBER 18

Dearest John,

wow, what a surprise. Today the postman delievered five golden rings. one for every finger. You're just imposible. But I love it . Frankly all that bird squwking was getting on my nerves.
All my love and kisses
Janet


DECEMBER 19

Dear John
hmm, when I opened the door this morning there were 6 geese laying on my front step. So, your back to the birds again, huh? These geese are huge. I don't know where to put them. The neighbors are complaining and I can't sleep at night with all the racket.Please stop.
Cordially,
Janet

DECEMBER 20

John,
WTF is with you and all these birds. Seven swans a swimming!!!! Is this some kind of sick demented joke?? There is bird poop all over the house and they never and they never stop the racket. I no longer sleep at night. I'm a nervous wreck at work. This is not funny. So please stop with the birds.
Sincerely,
Janet

DECEMBER 21

OK Buster I think I rather have the birds. What do I do with eight maids that want to be milking. The birds were bad enough. But, all eight maids brought eight cows so they could milk. Now my lawn is covered in manure and I can't even move in my own house. Just lay off me, smart ass
Janet

DECEMBER 22

Hey Shithead,

What are you some kind of sadist. Now there is nine pipers playing. And lord, do they play. They have never stopped chasing the maids since they got here yesterday. The cows are getting upset and they are stepping all over those squwaking birds. What am I going to do? The neighbors have started a petition to evict me.
You'll get yours!
Janet

DECEMBER 23

You rotton jerk. Now there is Ten ladies dancing very suggestive dances. I don't know why I call those sluts ladies. They been doing those pipers all night. I have eight maids crying cause they think they are ugly. The cows have diarrhea since they haven't been
milked. My living room is a river of shit. The commissioner of buildings has subpoenaed me to give cause why the building shouldn't be condemned. I'm calling the police on you!
Janet

DECEMBER 24

LISTEN SHITHEAD!!!!!! What is with eleven lords leaping on those maids and the ladies? Some of them won't be able to walk for awhile. The pipers ran through the maids and have been committing sodomy with the cows. All twenty three of the birds are dead. They were trampled to death in the orgy. I had to sell the gold rings to buy new shoes. I hope you are satisfied, you rotoon, vicious, swine.
Your sworn enemy,
Janet


DECEMBER 25

Dear Sir,
This is to acknowledge your latest gift of twelve drummers drumming which you have seen fit to inflict on our client, Miss Janet Woodson. The destruction, of course, was total. All correspondence should come to our attention. If you should attempt to reach Miss Woodson in Happy Dale Sanitarium, the attendants have been instructed to shoot you on sight. With this letter please find attached a warrant for your arrest.
Cordially
The law office of
Bonds, Domms, Sads, and Mats

Am starting to seriously doubt if i will ever be the slave Master wants or needs. When ever i think things are going well and let down my guards revealling a little more off myself i fuck up and just end up hurting the ones i care about or doing something i shouldnt have.


Maybe it would be best for everyone if i stopped fooling myself and admitted im just a want to be and will never be the slave He wants.

well can finally say that Master and slave solved a problem that has been a nagging problem from day one.


Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy we have finally found a position that works for us both with little possibility of leg cramps

Master and slave had our special time together this weekend.

A time much needed by both of us to relieve some of the tension and to basically unwind and relax.

Attended the Titanic Artifacts Exhibition definetly recommend it though have to admit slave did get the giggles when Master realised the boarding pass He had been given was not a male as He first thought but a 17yr old married female passenger.

Slave did tease Him about this throughout the day.

Attended Chains Saturday Evening where slave got to try out the new toy we brought neither of us really knew what it was but found out during the evening that it was  a leather version of a old carpet beater.

Slave certainly is sore today in fact she is finding it quiet difficult to sit and even the light fabric of a pair of leggings against her skin is painful.

But slave did ask for a hard session and totally slipped into sub space during the session Master having to assist slave to a place where she could lie down when session was over.

Master Joe the owner of chains gave the new toy the perfect name which we have decided to keep

MEAN NASTY MOTHER FUCKER

Many who know slaves Master know that He is a full time carer for His mother. Slave was recently introduced to Masters mother though of course she doesnt know the details of our relationship but she does accept slave as His girl friend and apparantly likes slave.


Recently Masters mother has had to be hospitalized a quiet stressful time for us both that has only brought us closer together and made our bond all the stronger.


Today while on a visit in the hospital slave was made fully aware of Masters influence on slaves thoughts and way of thinking.

Slave found herself physically observing the nurses doctors etc and thinking to herself mmm she would make a good pony. Kinda embarrassing but that is the way slaves twisted little mind now thinks.

this is to all the so called Dominants who message to say im ugly and to remove myself from the site.

Maybe you should learn to be a Master/Mistress takes self control nasty messages like that show lack of control maybe you need to go back to school and learn BDSM 101

'Twas the Internet Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the Net,
There were hacker's a surfing. Nerds? Yeah, you bet.
The e-mails were stacked by the inbox with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.

The newbies were nestled all snug by their screens,
While visions of Java danced in their dreams.
My Master on the sofa and me with a snack,
We just settled down at my rig (it's a Mac).

When out in the Web there arose such a clatter,
I jumped to the site to see what was the matter.
To a new page my Mac flew like a flash,
Then made a slight gurgle. It started to crash!!

I gasped at the thought and started to grouse,
Then turned my head sideways and clicked on my mouse.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
My Mac jumped to a page that wasn't quite clear.

When the image resolved, so bright and so quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick!
More rapid than mainframes, more graphics they came,
Then Nick glanced toward my screen, my Mac called them by name;

"Now Compaq! Now Acer!", my speaker did reel;
"On Apple! On Gateway!" Santa started to squeal!
"Jump onto the circuits! And into the chip!
Now speed it up! Speed it up! Make this thing hip!"

The screen gave a flicker, he was into my "Ram",
Then into my room rose a full hologram!
He was dressed in all red, from his head to his shoes,
Which were black (the white socks he really should lose).

He pulled out some discs he had stored in his backpack.
Santa looked like a dude who was rarin' to hack!
His eyes, how they twinkled! His glasses, how techno!
This ain't the same Santa that I used to know!

With a wink of his eye and a nod of his head,
Santa soon let me know I had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, gave my Mac a quick poke,
And accessed my C drive with only a stroke.

He defragged my hard drive, and added a "Dimm",
Then threw in some cool games, just on a whim!
He worked without noise, his fingers they flew!
He distorted some pictures with Kai's Power Goo!

He updated Office, Excel and Quicken,
Then added a screensaver with a red clucking chicken!
My eyes widened a bit, my mouth stood agape,
As he added the latest version of Netscape.

The drive gave a whirl, as if it were pleased,
St. Nick coyly smiled, the computer appeased.
Then placing his finger on the bridge of his nose,
Santa turned into nothing but ones and zeros!

He flew back into my screen and through my uplink,
Back into the net with barely a blink.
But I heard his sweet voice as he flew from my sight,
"Happy surfing to all, and to all a good byte!"

A SPECIAL WORLD


A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
it wraps us up in its cocoon
and holds us fiercely in its womb.

Its fingers spread like fine spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last
And at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world where we belong.

Wonders if people on cm read profiles my profile clearly shows that im a slave and that i am owned.


Why is that i keep getting mail both to own me or for me to own them.

I have my Master the one i wish to serve im devoted to him.


NO IM NOT LEAVING MASTER FOR ANOTHER DONT ASK THE ANSWER WILL BE A FIRM NO

AND NO I DONT WISH TO DOMME YOU IM NOT A DOMME IM NOT A SWITCH




I AM SLAVE READ IT AND TAKE NOTE