carmillaisabella

So I heard that 50 shades bullshit is being made into a movie... and here goes the further butchering of a lifestyle. People are going to run around reading and seeing that crap and think omg it's so great. Meanwhile the reality of what the lifestyle truly is will be lost and only older generations will know. This depresses me greatly. I think I have died a little bit inside. zero loves to read. I mean I love to read too but zero will read just about anything under the sun and is not so picky when it comes to the things she reads. She loves a wide variety of books but that crap yeah... she couldn't even stomach it. She got like half way through the second book and couldn't do it. She wanted to shoot herself. Upon asking her why she proceeds to explain and I was like ummm... yeah, no. So I figured I pick up the book and see and yeah I wanted to shoot myself. There are no words to describe my absolute rage and aversion to those books.

YAY!!!! 8 years together and Daddy married me. 8 years together, 7 years in the lifestyle, 5 years living together, 2 years with a slave and nearly 18 months with our precious little bundle of joy and smells.... Wow talk bout milestones. Our family is growing and bonding. I think zero was more excited about the marriage than me and Daddy combined lol. I love Oour family. It may be disfuctional at times and Wwe have our bad moment but at the end of the day there is love.

This is carmillaisabella's Owner, I'm posting a little note for everyone out there who happens to find her profile. I encourage My girls to make friends and talk to people, especially other subs/slaves, so they know they're not alone in the world of BDSM D/s M/s. Some of the messages recieved are great while others are disrespectfull and shameful, mostly of some so called dominants. Also invites and admirers will be blocked, unless either I or carmillaisabella know you and have been talking to you. So basically all uninvited invites, admirers and disrespectfull messages will be blocked. Thank you for Reading.

SirGabriel1st > collarme

Okay now here i go i think this is long over due for a rant of mine. Before i get messages blowing me up for my "disrespectful attitude to dominats" or "i'm not a real sub and an insult to all sub/slaves out there", know that my Master has read and fully agrees with everything i have said here. So if you don't like it i can tell you where to shove it, and, if you don't want me to tell you where to shove it He will be more than happy to tell you. I am going to rant about doms, dommes, and sub/slaves.

Here we go this is for all you wouldbe dommes out there, and yes would be doms i'm going to wack you in your balls just like this will be a kick in the ovaries to the wouldbe dommes. Running around saying you are a dominat and all must obey you DOES NOT make you dominat. It makes you an arrogant ignorant egotistical ass, but not a dominat. You have become an insult and big billboard of disrespect to all real true Dominats out there. Okay look for one if you can't take care of yourself financially what kind of dominate are you? Going around saying "I am a dominat and you will respect me" is bs period. Saying "I am a King/Lord or Queen/Princess and will be treated as such" is the most revulting thing i have ever seen in my life and all you people out there who show such disrepect not just for sub/slave but to other true dominats DOES NOT make you dominat in any way shape or form. All of you hold yourselves in a such a poor and inappropriate manner it's no wonder real people are harder and harder to find. What you should say is "Any sub/slave reading this should know that should you choose to accept my collar this is how things will be..." then proceed to list what you want. Go out and acting like your crap don't stink is disgraceful. A real Dominat should and would hold themselves in a more honorable, proper and appropiate manner. Don't know how you were even raised or if you even learned this but respect is earned not deserved. And another thing parading around demanding people address you as Master/Mistress. That unto itself does not make you a Master or Mistress. To be addressed as such you must earn that too. My Master earned the right to be addressed as such by me because for as long as Wwe have been together He knows me better than i know myself. I'm so predictable to Him that He can tell me He needs to tell me something but it's going to make me mad or it will upset me or i'll be happy. To be a Master or Mistress you have to master someone you have to know them fully and really be in their heads and just because you mastered that one person does not mean everyone must address you as such.

Now onto to next topic wouldbe sub/slaves. I am beyond sick and tired of hearing how well trained you are then you turn around saying how you DEMAND to be treated like this or that. It DOES NOT work that way. Learn your place. Yes you have a choice who you choose, yes you have the choice to walk away if things get bad. But to be honest you are no better than the wouldbe dommes and doms. Then you have the audacity to bitch moan and complain about the fake dominates. Ummm have you looked in a mirror lately. Look the idea is when things start out lay down ground rules, discuss and negotiate come to common ground. To sit there and proclaim you are a slave when you don't even know what it is to be a slave is disgusting, to claim you are submissive then demand you be treated like a princess and given all kinds of attention and nice things is disgusting. When i say i am the most precious thing to my Master it's not because i demand it of Him but because He told me i am. When push comes to shove in the end if there is anyone else involved He'd sooner see that other person go than risk losing me. Does that make him less of a Dom no.  To be of value or importance is in the eye of the beholder. To anyone else i am nothing, mean nothing, and they could probably care less. To demand to get this and that is not submissive in any way shape or form. To set up limits as to how far you will go is another story all together. When you make demands as a submissive or a slave you walk out of that barrier to have limits and refuse not for the sake of refusing but because it pushes those limits is submissive. Hence the use of SSC and safe words they are put in place for the safety of all parties involved be it sessions, scenes, or 24/7. All you are doing is topping from the bottom period that's not submissive or being a slave.

I believe i have said all i need to say whether someone reads it is another thing lol. Oh well if they don't no skin off of my back. I'm sure i'll add more later as i think of more. Now i'm very sleepy and i guess Master wants me to relax more being 6 months pregnant and all. This whole fatigue thing is really annoying but at least i'm not sick 24/7 like the first 3 months. I just sleep alot more and eat a little extra. Good night to A/all.

Well that was a little fail sauce... So much for thinking We got someone oh well off to look for a slave for another 3 years total.

Day 1

Got a slave

  So the more profiles i see the more it seems people just want fun. They say true slave and at the end it's like "oh send me a message for some fun" and it just really gets me down. Master seems unaffected by it. i suppose because He's been looking for so long it just doesn't phase Him anymore. He says it's good i'm so excited about looking but it's bad cause then i get too excite and hopeful. He says finding a true slave anymore is near impossible with how many fakes there are. And more just fake slaves but Masters/Mistress. Kids that are like oh what a cool kink i'm a Dom/me i want people to listen to me. Then demand a slave listen when he/she isn't even collar by them.  
  
  Master said to me He has always wanted a family, a wife and kids. But there is is other side that craves a slave. someone to break, beat, torture, use, ect, However He sees fit for His on amusement. So one day i asked Him why can't i be that why can't Wwe try to push my limits. He replied to me saying that i was not a slave at heart and assuming He forced it upon me and made me a true slave what kind of mother would that make for His children, what kind of wife would that be to present to His family, to "take out on the town". To be submissive is one thing to be a slave is different. His submissive will bare His children, take His name, be His wife, clean His home and care for the children. His slave will endure His tortures and wear His scars with pleasure and joy, be a maid in His home sharing in the domestic duties with His submissive yet serving her as well. A Slave of His will be what His submissive is not and His submissive will be what His slave is not. So He gave me the choice, told me to look into my heart, to meditate and decide who i am, will i enjoy being a lowly slave or a submissive. I thought the beatings sound wonderful being mindless depending on Him for every single tiny choice from food to clothes to were i sleep sounds beautiful but i had doubt. That doubt that led me to make the choice i made to be His submissive and in doing so realized i had a dominate side. Funny part is when i told Him about it He laughed at me because He already knew. He said not only would a slave fill His appetite but mine as well. My need for a companion, for a servant, to mentally degrade and break someone. I found where Master is sadist physically and mentally, i'm more sadistic mentally. 
 
  At first i hated the idea of another woman in Oour home. He told me to stop being jealous and focus, meditate and channel all that engery and jealousy. When i did i found i was no longer felt jealous. I had infact gotten more intouch with my Dominate side. I no longer thought a slave was going to take my Master away from me but rather how to help break her, train her, torture her. Now i wait and long for a slave to join Uus. Oh how i still count the days.
Day 3

Well no luck for today. Oh well there is always tomorrow and the day after and the day after that. i think i'm going to count the days untill Wwe find the slave meant for Uus so this will be.
day 2

Well first day and meh profile is up and running w00t. Time to start counting all the fakes the send me messages, along with all the male slaves who want to join my Master and i. Oh and we can't forget the Masters/Mistresses who will try to collar me, or the ts/tv too. And last but not least the Dom/mes who think just because i wear a collar i should do as they say. Sorry too many times it's happened yet i still remain hopeful to find the one true slave girl who will join my Master and i as a perminate 24/7 TPE slave.
Day1