i am submissive, i am confusing, odd,quirky,eclectic,strange,and have a great sense of humor and i love to laugh.. heck i need to laugh with the full life i have. i have three kids and am happy where i am at ..thank you very much.. just because i am submissive does not mean i am a door mat and my kids come before anyone. i am not looking for anything in particular here..just friends... oh..and if you have something childish to say... or mean or nasty about me being a BBW. keep it to yourself.. grow up, this is not junior high and stupidity will not be tolerated..thanks!
8/31/2009 6:02:11 PM
i just have a quick gripe. i signed on today and on my page was the profile of a Dominant. ok ,,,cool, no biggie. but it is really odd to me to see a Dom who has all these "qualifications" on His page, a practical check list of things she must do, say, adhere to, and be physically, and she MUST provide a profile with a head shot. well this is odd to be because He, himself, did not have a head shot, just a body shot. like all a female submissive looks for is a body. like she does not want someone who is nice on the eyes, in her opinion, or she does not want someone intelligent to stimulate her mind, just a shot of a hairy chest. wouldn't it be great if on a submissive's page they only wanted responses from wealthy males who are six foot two inches, gave her an expense account, and who had a massive penis that would go ALL night long. (giggles)
some "Dominant" males are SO shallow and have no clue what LIVING this really is all about. they like the illusion of grandure. a REAL Dom is in it for the long haul, with patience and attention to details with lots of care. someone who is not pushy with your emotions, who only wants the best from you, nothing more. kinda funny how the GOOD ones are so hard to find. they are few and far between. now granted, the "bedroom only" situation works for MANY, due to situations in their lives, but in that case they should not parade around acting as if they do this 24/7 and every female should bow to their feet. this girl does NOT bend her knee to just anyone. that is EARNED, not handed out like a party favor. i now KNOW my worth and will not settle for second rate Dominance. that does not mean i am not friendly to all or most, and respectful of those who have shown me respect. i adore Doms with an easy going personality and who know how to laugh and have a good time. relaxing and joking around does not make one LESS Dominant, it makes them MORE Dominant in my eyes. they do not have to walk around with a puffed chest to elicit the behavior desired in those around Him..a mark of one of the rare good ones...in my humble opinion of course.
and for all the dorks who think that a submissive has NO right to voice an opinion or thought, ehhhh you have obviously read this far, you could have stopped at any time, so i do not need messages stating your ignorant ideals. keep the negatives to yourselves please. they crowd my emails and i do not have time to waste even opening them, my time is better spent serving the One who has worked so hard to open me up and bring so much good from me. thanks for your time anyways.
6/1/2009 9:12:36 PM
once again..mindless wanderings of my troubled mind. i am having trouble clearing my head of a silly thought.."i am about to be 30", now before everyone gives me a lecture on 30 not being "old" i KNOW that, it is just hard leaving one era of my life behind as a twenty-something, to become a thirty-something. perhaps i thought i would have accomplished more in my twenties, but i set aside my personal goals and dreams to devote my time to my most precious possessions, my children.
how my mind is right now, how troubled it is in so many aspects other than my upcoming birthday, that i cannot complete tasks asked of me by my Daddy. this pains me deeply, and thus making the problem worse! how in the HECK do you stop the cycle? how do you always be happy when all your planning for your birthday is going up in smoke? i doubt i will get tattooed for my birthday, partly cause one of my best friends was suppose to do it with me, and she is too sick with cancer to do it right now. and she and i are suppose to do it together and get matching ones. i probably won't get to get a new outfit for my night out..ughhh.. and i have to put off getting my hair done too.... i am so sick of always giving to everyone else and not ever getting anything back on my special day, the ONLY thing that i still get on my birthday so far is my husband being my Designated Driver so my and my friends can drink together and have a "girl's" night. i almost feel like canceling the whole dang night and ordering a double cheese pizza, a case of soda, and lots of movies that will make me cry, laugh, and get scared. i don't have to shave my legs or do my hair, i can drink all by myself and be just fine. i wanna get SO drunk that iut about pee myself and have NO clue the next day what i did the last 4 hours of celebrating...LOL!! ..
4/25/2009 7:21:47 PM
well, thanks to a stinkin hacker, i have to re-do everything from my old computer...grrr. even stuff on my profile is different..blehh. i think i got it fixed and stuff. i do want to restate about last weekend. i had a great time. i really did. it was crazy in more ways than one. i did break one rule of my own, and i am stressing a little about it, but..ehh i'll get over it. and NO ONE told me that bruises on a fat tush take TIME to fully come up?! what is up with that?! i mean, i was super proud of them to begin with, i really was, but as time has went by and the soreness gone, i looked again and was like..omggggggg! it looks like i was pushed off of a bridge and hit the concrete butt first! holy cow! but i get the warm fuzzies knowing i survived it, and for my FIRST spanking in like forever, AND my first ever with evil things like different paddles and crops and canes and stuff like that. at first i did not think i could take it, but i am stubborn and thankfully it went from "ouchhhhh holy..." to. .."omgggg moreee". but seeing as i was totally gagged, i am not sure if someone could tell. i could barely walk or sit for daysss afterwards. WOW. some people need a warning sign like "Evil Mastermind at work..BEWARE!" giggles!
OMG, i have to remember to get the magazine i got in the mail from my mom in law's it has DESIGNER DUCT TAPE!!! i want the paisley one!! i can't wait to post the link and check out how many designs they have! what a great stocking stuffer for the kinkster in your life!!! yayyyyy
4/14/2009 9:42:02 AM
ahhh! i am having a freakin fantastic day! i dunno exactly why, it is raining, i have a ton of crap to do to get ready for the weekend. i am still moving, i have work today and meetings in the evening, but i feel SO sexy and sassy and stinkin cute today! i keep running my hands over my butt and thighs*shrugs* i feel nice..LOL let's hope this feeling lasts for the next few days!! i am going away for the weekend to do some photography and maybe painting, i have not sat in a park for hours and just painted in a long long time! i might check out a club or two at night, cause i am NOT da MOMMA this weekend! let's slut it up! LMAO j/k
1/28/2009 7:25:41 PM
some new developments in my life are coming to light. these changes are for the better! i am finding a new happiness and finding my footing in a new chapter in my life. i am enjoying my new freedom and loving my new challenges as well. it is wonderful to find someone who challenges you and pushes you for all the right reasons, with no pressures to be perfect when we all know none of us are perfect. i am finding that i like who i am becoming, and with this new inspiration, i am writing more, and more openly. i am learning not to be embarrassed with where my thoughts and imagination take me. it is mine to have, and mine to share, and there is nothing wrong with being creative in life. thank you so much for shedding a light into my world and sweeping out some of the cobwebs that clouded it. it means more to me than you know.
1/18/2009 10:20:41 AM
wow, i have not updated this thing in a long time! i need to work on that i think. i was just pondering some stuff and thought i would fill in some blank space.
i really do not understand males at all. i really don't. they say that it is impossible to understand women, we are not all that complex, we just speak a different language, that's all. and gentlemen, a bit of advice, if a female says, nothing is wrong, sometimes that is not entirely the truth. SOMETIMES something is wrong or something is bothering them, but you do not speak the same language. sometimes we avoid talking about it to avoid looking weak, pathetic, or vulnerable. sometimes we avoid talking about it, cause it is not worth a fight or trying to explain WHY we feel a certain way. men want to know the problem so they can fix it, and sometimes there is NO fixing it, it just is. nothing can be done to rectify the situation, so she just may need time to find a way to cope with it. like.... if a man spits in the trash can or sink..omg! that bothers me to no end, but there is nothing i can do to change it. i am not going to ask him to NOT spit in the trash or sink anymore, if that is where he needs to put it, alrighty then, i will find a way to cope, i will get angry, and maybe hurt that he does not think i have to put my hands in it to clean it. all i can do, is look before i put dishes in the sink and run water, avoid looking at it as much as possible, keep a smiling face and watch what i say. true, he could NOT spit, but why change what he does to please me? it is not THAT much od a big deal. it IS just spit and if it is something that he has always done, then so be it, i have to accept it as part of him. i would feel sooo bad if he changed how he acted to make me happy. THAT in itself would not make me happy, knowing that he is always worried about if all his actions affect me. i am tolerant, i can just deal with it, make a few adjustments in my life, and TRY to keep my reactions to a minimum.
so see guys, sometimes it is best to just let it be, if she brings it to you, fine, if she avoids watching you spit, don't feel offended, just accept it. leave it at that, unless you see her practically puking at just the sound of it...LOL. just keep a vigilant eye on her, learn to read her, know when she does not want to talk, she just needs to be near you or held by you to reassure her of what she is in your life, if only for right now. you never know what tomorrow brings. she will always come around and not act like such a psycho. we are not all that complex, a simple hug heals many things, always remember that. the simple little things that you do, mean SO much to girls. we don't always need a dozen roses or diamonds or some expensive collar, just knowing you are there for us, no matter what, is all we need.
sometimes being TOO concerned and digging too much, can push some sensitive people away from you as well, and we all know you do not want that. that is especially true when you are dealing with a girl with "baggage" or who some consider "damaged property". just give her time, that is all she needs. don't over do it, it may backfire one day and she can regress as well. and no one wants to see that happen either. everyone involved wants the other person to blossom and grow. and with one that always feels that there is a black cloud blocking out her sun, it is you that becomes her new sunshine. and watch what strings you have on her heart, a girl will protect that at all costs. even if it means giving up the one thing that makes her happy, for fear of pain.
see, we are not all that hard to understand. all you have to do is listen, and watch. you will find all you need to know without even a word spoken. if you gentlemen need any more advice....lol..ask away, i could write a book on stuff like this. and i think i have quenched my writing itch now...thanks.. but this one will probably not be up for long, so feel lucky if you catch it. and i may be taking down my pics again, it depends on my mood, when i wanna hide from the prying eyes of everyone, i take them down. sometimes it bothers me to know people are staring at me...odd i know..lol
9/26/2008 7:54:01 AM
once again, i have been inspired to write, scarey huh?
i have read profiles and blogs of many Dominants(mostly male), and they all claim to want a submissive female, who is eager to serve, wants to fill His every need, blah blah blah. what ever happened to wanting a smart, independant, fulfilled, creative female? i mean, service is a high priority, but that is kind of a "duhh" thing. you are in this lifestyle, and are Dominant, so DUHHHH you want someone to serve you. Not all are of lowered intelligence that we need reminding what it is we, as submissives, love to do. and i have also seen others blogs and profiles that were SO overly detailed, as to what size she will be, he hair, how she eats, her shoe size, etc. OMG!! i feel like changing my profile to reflect how some fill theirs out, but being what i want in a Dominant. wake up people!!! we are not ALL perfect, but i am sure those certain Dominants who are basically custom ordering a submissives, feel that they themselves are the perfect specimine of manhood. and Dominant Men that demand to be called "Sir" or "Master"...well not from this lil girl it won't! that title has to be earned!!! and deserved!! a "Sir" is one who is owning you, discovering you, learning with you, loving you. a "Master" is just that... one who has MASTERED all that is YOU, every aspect of the ever evolving female mind and body. it is tough to get to that title..well in my book anyways!! and in my life..my book is all that matters..LOL. how impressive is it to Dominate a lamb? to see a lamb bend it's knee to you.. that is not a hard task to do at all. but having a wild lioness bow to you, WOW, what a feat! what an HONOR! i do not call ANY male "Sir" or "Master", even when it is in their online name, i try to avoid it and not look rude. but any Male that demands someone who is not his property to address him in that manner, to me, has serious ego issues, in my humble female opinion(lol). what joy and fullfillment would someone get when things in life were always made easy for them? challenges along the way make life interesting and memorable, enjoy life and grab a complex, imperfect girl to make your own, and ride that rollercoaster of life to it's fullest, you never know how long you have on this planet, so li!ve it up ...BIG
9/24/2008 10:04:28 PM
ahhhhhhhh i have to return a favor....and it might just brighten His day too! a DEAR friend of mine... my Froggie, has a big boo-boo on His knee, please send all your good energy His way and light a candle and send good thoughts His way too. hugzzz to my Froggie!!! Your princess will find you soon and slap a smooch on you that will light up your life!! i miss you greatly and i will send all my good "vibes" to you..umm if you start craving pickles or a cheese danish... ummm by pass that... it is just a residule thing...giggles!!
9/18/2008 6:41:41 PM
ahhh, what is new, what is rambling in the vastness that is my head(hehe). i dunno, but i like to free write. it does help with the flow of creative juices.
i have a question, can one find happiness in life? or are we, as humans, always looking for that new "high" of happiness. are we all truely content, or do we still lay at nights in our beds thinking about what could have been, what might be, and what has been? do we have a secret dream lover who does everything JUST right? a Man/woman with skilled hands and a dreamy voice, who "just knows"? are those just silly thoughts, or our souls yearning for something more? we all strive to be the best at something, no matter what it is. i DO think that is why so many relationships end, the person we are with, suits our needs for the place we are in our lives, then one day, we just "out grow" them. some stay in their marriages, or relationships, due to the fact that they truely love the person they are with, even though that person does not fullfill them in every aspect that they need. many stray from the one they are committed to, not for a lack of love, but lack of stimulation, wheather intellectually or physically. if people would only realize this, and try to learn to help seek out what the other person NEEDS, then many realationships would still be intact. i MY opinion, an open relationship is not a sign of failure, but a sign of true love and commitment. you are committed to give your partner what they need to be truely fullfilled. love is suppose to be unselfish and wonderful, and for the most part it is. but our human minds and needs, many times, tear apart our emotional selfs. a truely confliciting creature us humans, huh?
i am glad i have left the door open for my husband to look at other females as potential sexual partners. i feel NO shame, NO guilt, NO jealousy. i really don't. i KNOW being married does get boring. even though my husband claims he could NEVER sleep with someone else, i know he can. i KNOW how he was before he married and even before he "decided" on me. he was seeing another female the same time he was seeing me. although i did not know it until years later. i know in the short time between his first wife and me...there were more than 4 females, only 4 of which he will admit to(lol). he was, and still is deep inside, a man whore, and that is ok with me. i believe he thinks i will use any woman he decides to sleep with against him in some way, but the thought is actually a big turn on! we sat and talked one night..a long time, he still claims he cannot see himself doing that, but he is finally seeing all of the females that flirt with him with me sitting RIGHT THERE. they act like i am not sitting in the car waiting for him, or i am not at the table with him. they cannot help it. he is a BIG guy, and something about him draws females in, i dunno, it got me.
do i have an alterior motive for wanting him to be with other females...yup. i have to be honest. i want to explore with other males as well. i have not been with many men in ANY sexual way. i am a prude. i was working on that fact with hubby, but he does not have the time for that right now. would i like to have someone in my life to help me get "back on track" with my training..heck yeah!! but can i be patient? i have to, i have no choice. i think almost 4 years is a very long time to wait for any quality time, and play time. even though hubby HAS made a small effort to squeeze a few swats in recently, it still is not enough...yet. do i hope this is an effort to "get back in the swing of things" omg... yes. i have become self sufficient, able to make EVERY decision now. i don't like it. but i still show him respect every day. i ask permission even to buy a soda, or pack of gum. i ask to go to the bathroom when in public, and still serve him dinner and make sure his bath stuff is ready when he needs. i still help bathe him when asked. and some different hygeine things, like clipping toes, trimming facial hair, shaving private areas when he wants me to..things like that. i do my best to care for my man even though every day i feel neglected and taken for granted. what i DO do is never enough, and never good enough, never right. so i am in a bit of an emotional slump. but i will always be alright. when life closes one door in my life, it always flings open a window. i will be going down to the local community college to see about spring classes, i might even MAKE my hubby watch the kids and get a part time job for the holiday season that is coming up. i WILL get my degree. i WILL do my art. i WILL do what makes me happy. i do have a small adventure starting, i am TRYING to start up my own small business... sewing baby stuff, and hopfully expanding to custom embroidery as well. so wish me luck on that. i am even making a few ferrett clothes for a friend, they are half finished though, i HAVE to make more time in the evenings to finish those up and get to sewing my stuff.. i have put that stuff on hold LONG enough. i will NOT disappoint Smudge and Noodle, two cute lil fashionable ferrets..giggles!
so that is my ramble today..who knows what i might come up with next...my mind is scarey..huh???LOL
9/1/2008 7:00:16 PM
it has been a sad, sad, holiday weekend for me. one of my dear friends was in an accident over the weekend. they put her in a coma , due to the nature of her accident. they were afraid of brain trauma. after scanning, she had zero brain trauma. they got specialist to come see her, she had a stroke while driving and hit a parked car. by the time they figured out what all had happened, half of her brain was dead. the part that regulates your breathing and other body functions vital for life. her husband had to make the decision to take her off life support, as she would have wanted. he decided to wait till today to do it, so family had time to come and say their goodbyes. they were lifestylers,lovers, friends, and a happily married couple. her last act of love and mercy for her husband and Master, was, she died on her own, so He would not have to do the hardest task of turning off her machines. she died peacefully a little after midnight early this morning. what a great act of love she was able to do... to take that burden off of her Master's shoulders. a fantastic submissive to the end. i love you Faithy, i will miss you dearly, thank you for letting me be your friend. and i am greatful to have had you in my life, some were not as fortunate.
**please forgive any typos, i did this through tears**
8/27/2008 11:01:09 PM
well, i guess it was about time for me to say something different again. my profile looks old and stuff. i am hoping to add some new pics, ones where i am not wearing any makeup. i know!! daring huh?? we will see how fast i can get them up here...giggles!!
**just a lil side note, to see who read this, lol, i am really enjoying my Daddy**wink**
7/24/2008 9:29:09 AM
ahhhhhhhh the summer job is finally done... time to clean house!! gonna go gut all the closets,and crawers, and make our lives as simple as possible! i have rethought my decision to rant and give some people the satisfaction of getting under my skin. so i am cleaning house in more ways than one, and i like it. my house and family come first, and me in a happy state is the best way to give them what they need from me. i am hoping to get our business booming after hubby/Dom decided to take a break, that has now lasted almost 2 months! so i will kick it back into high gear and start preparing for winter. ( i do the whole canning thing..IF i have time now) i DO hope to plan a local "family reunion" type thing for those in the lifestyle that just want to get away and have a nice weekend. now...all i have to do is find a PLACE to do it. so this lil bee is busy busy busy..wish me LUCK!!
6/23/2008 8:29:35 AM
well.. things are slowly getting better. the only complaint i have is the fact that CHad thinks i should go swimming more. i do not swim anymore. i think he just either wants to embarrass me..or see me in a swim suit. either way..it ain't happening.lol. AND he told a coworker who is retiring, that i am a "panty dropper" when it somes to certain cars.. his buddy has an old mustang..that he spent 20 years restoring!! omg..it is a convertable toooooo.i do admit that old mustangs "do" something to me... so, i now have a joy ride with his buddy from work who i have never met..LMAO! he also told him how i lit up like the forth of july when i heard i can go for a ride in it!! omg..how embarrassing! but there is jsut something about an old mustang..anything before 73 or so..does it for me..depends on the paint job if the ones in med 70's hits the right spot. is that sick? lol. does that make me a gold digger, who is only out to find a sexy car? well since i am married.. i do not think it is a gold diggin situation, i just wanna ride in it..perhaps stop at a drive in eatery...and get an old fashioned root beer float and a hamburger!! the ones where they hang your food on the window..we have one here..and maybe a drive in movie...ahhhhh how perfect! my hair in a pony tail... blowing in the wind...sexy!!! gotta love a sleek machine with the top down*smiles*
6/20/2008 6:42:36 AM
wellllllllllllll, look like i have had a couple of people checking out my profile a few times...giggles!! they just look and look and do not say anything. maybe they should at least drop a little note in the box once in a while. and ONE in particular should know i like things stuffed in my box..LMAOa!!
6/12/2008 7:46:29 PM
i just got back from the double viewing, and thank goodness i did not have to see a baby casket! they put them together in the same one.... it was their "mommy/daughter" weekend, and they died together, on the little girl's FIRST airplane ride. she loved airplanes since she was a baby... she could spot one before anyone else could. this was obviously the way she was meant to leave us. the scouts have been asked to do a proper color guard ceremony for her tomorrow, and to escort her from the church. i just can't be there to watch them put them in the ground. i am so glad they decided to put them together.... side by side. everyone put little stickers on the coffin to decorate it in many different shiney and puffy stickers. there was well over a thousand people who came through the doors of the church...it was wall to wall pictures and video tributes. the one thing that broke my heart, was a piece of butcher paper that they did an art project with, it said "The Gerwins" and has all their hand prints.. someone framed it for them. there was a school project that the son had to do..and he wrote about his baby sister.... four pages! there was tons of pictures of the brother holding the sister..beaming with joy. oh God i can't talk about it any more or i will be a mess. please, who ever reads this, please light a candle and remember to hug those around you, no matter how seldom you see them, one day, when they are gone, you will realize how BIG a hole it leaves in your life.
6/8/2008 6:14:51 PM
well, i just got more bad news. i got a call a couple hours ago, a plane went down either going from or coming to the airport off of 53, in fremont, and it crashed... i believe they said there were five people on board. two of those were dear friends of ours. Danielle age 31, and her daughter age 4 were among the victims. she is survived by her husband and son, who is close to my son's age. she owned a small pizza shop as well. they made such yummy pizzas!! we are all in shock at this moment, and we are all sure it will be on the news to night as well. we will all miss her dearly and our hearts are breaking for the husband who lost his wife, and his baby girl..and for the son who will not wake to smell his mommy making pancakes. please light a candle and pray that somehow, some way, the pain of this will subside and they can remember the good times. *cries*
3/6/2008 7:30:43 PM
at times i wish i were a switch... i could SOOO wash someone's dirty mouth out and flog a dirty tongue till someone learned to keep their comments to themselves. for anyone wanting to know what i am talking about..just ask..it is NOTHING to do with my friends i converse with at the present time.. just a jerk who felt like farting in my cereal.
3/5/2008 9:21:17 PM
yall should shoot me with a pea shooter when i do journal entries like that one!! sheesh! but i made myself a promise... i have to leave that up for at lease one more day..dang it..then i can take it down. MAN! i wish i could crawl under a rock till tomorrow.
3/5/2008 2:20:17 AM
well, it was another sleepless night for me. i was up thinking. just could not turn my mind off, especially when i hear..or read..or see something that gets it going or peaks a curiosity.
i was reading something, and it mentioned "forced orgasms"(omg i must be insane typing this..must be lack of sleep, i may delete it..who knows). and it also mentioned "orgasm denial". and there was a link.. i stupidly clicked it..thinking it lead to more information..wrong! the info i got was just explaining WHAT it was....not the reasons behind doing it.and the link..well it was to a porn site..great. not what i was wanting to pop across my screen. it made my running mind worse. how can someone do some of those activities in a spot light situation...woth so many people around? is it a "being watched" thing? a humiliation thing? i don't think i will ever "get it".
omggg and the sound that blasted over my speakers was sooooooo embarrassing for me.!!! and i was not even saying it!! hell, i could not say that kind of stuff no matter how much some one else wanted me to. my throat closes up and if pushed too hard... i almost have a panic attack. am i a brat?? a spoiled lil girl who just wants her way? why do i have so many lil "rules" that surround how i do things?? well... it is a comfort thing.. it is very hard for me to let go enough to do some things...and if a lil night gown and socks makes me more comfortable to be able to do that.. then what is the harm?? i really need those things..especially if i know i may be pushed in an area... i need my few comfort things to get through the mental aspects of the environment. for me, it is so much more mental than anything else. and since it has been sooo long since me and my husDom have been able to scene, or train, or play, i have sadly regressed some... seems all my efforts and hard work just went out the window, and now i have to start all over again. i did not realize how far i regressed until someone asked me something tonight... and i could not and would not answer it. *sighs* so looks like back to square one for me.
i am so glad i still have the ability to write my feelings out and vent here..at least it is somewhere . i have sadly went back to not being able to fully enjoy my "private" intimate time.i won't let myself have an orgasm, no matter how hard i try or how long i keep with it. so now i am frustrated..stressed... mad... sad.... overwhelmed, and exhausted. what fun am i to be around now..dang it!!!
3/4/2008 10:40:40 PM
omggggg !! **screams and pulls my hair out**
what is with people these days?? just for the record... i am married.. have kids.. no i am not looking for another "Dom". don't need one.. nor want one... i am finished looking for someon to be shared with.. i am just looking for friends..if this is too much for anyone to understand... sorry
OH..and i am a BBW..if a fat ass is not what you are looking for... please keep your nasty comments to yourself.. it is childish to call names... you are not in grammer school anymore, so upgrade your maturity level . thanks!!
2/24/2008 1:56:29 AM
that is IT!! i am soooo going on a diet. i did this picture analysis thing that showed which celebrities you look like and by what percentage.. well.. i got angelina jolie at 89%!!! woohhooo. now to lose the three pregnancy belly flabby flop thing.. the jiggly arms that keep waving when you are done.. a boob job...cause i breast fed two kids and currently a third..and contrary to what some think.. breast feeding does NOT make your boobs bigger...bigger means engorged and pain.. not full and fun..LOL..and the thighs..gotta slim the inside and out side of those puppies.. looks like iam smuggling sacks of quarters between my legs for goodness sakes. but i DO have pretty ankles..**bats my eyes**. and small hands..teeheeee. ahhhhh after all that.. i will look like angelina jolie.... perhaps..... 95 percent then...lol. if only pffttttt!
2/18/2008 6:17:57 PM
**squeels** i can't believe it.. i actually bought a new purse!! yeahhh. Daddy said it was sooo cute! it has tinkerbell on it..giggles!! i needed one that had more room for all the planners i have for all the crap i do.. and i found it by accident..and ON SALE...woohoooo( done homer simpson style baby!)
2/3/2008 8:05:03 PM
hmmmmm..what makes a submissive a submissive? does she HAVE to beg, be on her knees?does she HAVE to say "Sir" or "Master"?does she HAVE to divulge all her secret fantasies? does she have to always look at the floor? does she have to always be meek and mild??
i would think it much more interesting to have a submissive who can stand up for herself and be able to take care of business, who is an extention of you and one who represents the time and training you have done. and wouldn't knowing that a lil mystery is very intruiging?
this life style is not all about whips and chains and spankings..it is taking pride in something bigger than yourself. watching another blossom and thrive in Your care. remembernot to drag them down while youare trying to build thm up.. that is my rant for the day..thanks
1/26/2008 10:44:52 PM
i decided to make a new journal...lol.. the old one looked boring.. ok..here is the low down. i am married.. no i am not leaving my hubby.. yes we have our troubles like everyone else.. we are working on it.. i have kids... i do NOT look like a model.. i am fat..and i do NOT mean 5 or 10 pounds of extra to love.. i DO mean fat.. i am to the point and do not lie about it.. i AM a BBW.. and i always will be.. some of what i have now is fading back to MY normal size, not cindy crawford's size.. i DID just have a baby.. i do not cyber.. no i am not sending you pictures.. i have one on the site.. that is the best it is going to be for a while.
have fun and enjoy yourselves. live your own life .. not mine
