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ThatGuy918
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smash77
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| I was searching this site for the longest time, talking to people, and not really finding what I thought I needed. So I started dating in the vanilla world, and fell in love...and wound up outing a closeted Dominant.
We are in a full time D/s relationship, and seeking friends who have the same, want the same, or just want to be friends with a slightly dorky, blissfully happy couple.
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Still looking for friends out there, people who are like-minded and sociable...we like to go out for karaoke and bullshitting....would be nice to have more friends we can be totally open in front of....our group of kinky friends is slowly growing, but the more, the merrier! |
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Wow! Life got very busy and interesting, and I actually forgot about the site.
My Master and I are now living together, and sharing custody of his 3 year old identical twin daughters. Life is full, fun, interesting, sometimes stressful, but very good.
Going to poke around and see who we can meet, not so much for play, but just to hang out with. It's good to have friends who know, live, and understand the lifestyle. My vanilla friends don't quite get it. |
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Former Eagles Fan Seeking New NFL Team.
Must have fun playing the game, win a few here and there, make life exciting. Must NOT employ convicted animal abusers.
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Just a question...is there really a "typical" appearance that a Dom should have? What should a Dom look like? My Master was told recently that he did not look like a Dom, and it kind of bothered him. And it's bothering me more than it's bothered him. Do you really have to look a certain way to be able to dominate your submissive? Have a certain wardrobe in order to wield a flogger or use restraints?
For me, it's the tone in my Master's voice that lets me know I've crossed the line, the look in his eye. Those two things bring me back in line quicker than the cane.
It's not the size of the man who dominates me, it's the way he dominates me, completely, yet lovingly. As a boyfriend, Master, friend, lover. He's the complete package for me, though the packaging may not be "standard issue" for a Dom.
Has anyone else ever heard this? That they don't look like a Dominant, or look like a submissive? Why are there set ideas of what we should look like? Don't we have enough to deal with being judged from the "outside" world, that we need to judge others in the lifestyle?
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Obviously, I am not here much anymore. I will be making a better effort to pop in and see if I can find new friends. As one of my daily tasks is to send a detailed email to my Master, I'll be online daily. For the foreseeable future...don't know if it will continue once we're living together.
I am finding new security, new confidence, new feelings for another person I never knew existed. I have had scenes with another Dominant, but not one that I had anything more than a friendship with. I was submissive, he was Dominant, we got along, and we played. He taught me so much about the technical side of the Lifestyle.
Now my Dominant is rather new to the scene. He knows what he knows from reading a lot of books, talking to a select few people. His technical skills are improving with practice. (Oh, how I love the practice!) But the emotional connection we have is almost unnerving at times. We dated for a little while before I revealed my submissive side to him. He asked questions, I gave him books, and pointed him to people to talk to. Now, over a year later, this man holds my heart, soul, body...all are in his keeping. I trust him completely. And I've never had that before, in ANY relationship.
It's fun, but scary. And hard not to be able to talk about every aspect of my relationship with my friends. They may have picked up some of our "kinky" side, and know that he's the boss in our relationship, but I don't think they would know what to say if they knew the whole story.
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Disregard journal entry from July expounding on the joys of having found a man to stop my aimless wandering...he's apparantly fallen off the face of the earth, is not returning my calls...and is dumping me in the way of a true coward. Oh well. His loss, or so I keep telling myself. |
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It's better to be hated for who you are than loved for who you are not. |
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During a recent conversation with someone who was trying to "understand" me, and figure out what I'm looking for...I realized something...something that I've probably known for a long time now, but it surfaced and sort of slapped me upside the head.
I'm not an easy person to understand. I'm not a "typical" anything, in any form of the word.
I have a pierced nose, and I love Garth Brooks. I'm comfortable barefoot, in high heels, or in my Durango boots.
I have tattoos, and I sleep with a teddy bear.
One night I'll go out drinking, dancing and partying with my friends, the next morning I'm up early to take a litter of homeless kittens to an adoption day.
I listen to Enigma and Amy Winehouse, to Johnny Cash and Over the Rhine. To the Dixie Chicks, Pink, the Indigo Girls. Tanya Tucker and Rob Zombie.
So, no, I'm not an easy person to understand. And no, I may not know EXACTLY what I want, but I'll know it when I find it, I guess. I'm submissive, but that's only one part of who I am...and the rest of me is rather diverse, to put it nicely. You can know me for years, and I can still turn around and surprise the hell out of you.
Predictable? Nope. Fun? For the right person, yeah. |
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I know it says no criticism of others...so no names will be mentioned.
I just want to know what goes on in the head of someone who feels it necessary to message a total stranger and tell them that it looks like they got beat with an ugly stick. When I opened that message, I was shocked, and mostly annoyed.
I know my looks aren't for everyone, nor do I find EVERY person I meet to be handsome, gorgeous, or totally attractive, but I don't have the compulsion to tell someone that I think they're ugly...especially when they're total strangers to me.
And it annoys me that this jackass' comment is making me spend this much time, but LORD! |
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No longer aimless. i've actually managed to meet a man through vanilla channels who is at this time not my Dominant, but is totally understanding of my submissive side. We're dating, talking, and slowly falling in love. i'll still keep my profile active, as i like making new friends with similar interests, but i'm no longer wandering aimlessly. |
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i am the real thing. An honest to God submissive. Even if i don't want to be, it's something i cannot deny.
There are times, as a survivor of rape and domestic violence, that i wonder why and how i can still submit to a man. After the pain and horror i've been though, why give a man a position of power over me?
Through a lot of soul searching, i've realized it's because i'm TRULY submissive, it's natural and right to me, and i cannot be any other way.
i am not here to be used as a plaything. i am not here to be propositioned for sex. i'm looking for someone who can see beyond the scars, and help me grow despite them. i want someone who can appreciate all aspects of me, my brain, my heart, my soul, my whacked out sense of humor, my love of family and friends, and my desire to submit...and accept the gifts i have to give. They are not to be taken lightly, and i don't offer them easily or freely. |
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Through some play and experimentation, i have found that breath play is an extreme hard limit for me. i was exposed only visually, and i'm still experiencing the ramifications of the memories it triggered.
So, if you live for or love breath play, please remember it's TOTALLY off limits before you contact me. |
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just started my profile tonight...haven't loaded pictures...hoping that i can get some good ones taken that show all my ear piercings and tattoos. i have a feeling they'll scare some more conservative-types away, but so be it! i'll take that chance, since i won't change those for anyone. (well the tattoos aren't really negotiable, anyhow.) well, here i am, testing the waters and getting ready to jump in. Wish me luck! |
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| Age: 39 |
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Arkansas |
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