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I have made 2 male employees cry in the last 2 weeks.....I think I may have to find a quick outlet before I ream another one for their shoddy work. |
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In a recent email exchange with another CM member about looking for lasting connections I wrote the following, I think it sums up my current head space:
I think it's more of a matter of looking for connections without bringing a list of wants/desires first. I know for myself if someone has interests different than mine I usually will not spend the time meeting etc. More because in my experience it becomes an expectation of what they want (granted this applies more to the bsdm community).
I believe if I met someone and a deep loving relationship developed I would be more likely to engage in bdsm venues that normally wouldn't interested me.
Of course this is just me opinion and why I have been dating more in the "vanilla" arena of late. I grew tired of meeting people who only thoughts were of play and what I would do to them. I wasn't meeting any one of substance (or at least they weren't allowing me to see their true nature) and while a good session would satisfy me short term, I would quickly bore of the person knowing it wouldn't go any father as they only were interested in me for my Dominant abilities. |
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Finally a dreadfully dramatic summer of family fun and angst is drawing to a close. I am regaining my self. I have not had much meet up/dating goodness in our community and found more entertaining interactions in the "vanilla" arena. I still believe that I can meet similar minded sickos who also enjoy life as well rounded individuals. |
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I am a sadist. If you are contacting me about "play" and have no other interest in other interactions, my use of you will be limited to by sadistic desires. I will not have any sexual play or use with you, I do not waste time on anal, queening etc for limited relationships.
I will objectify you, beat you silly and then leave. If you are attached, your partner must be aware of your activities. |
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As I am interested in a BDSM based relationship and to partake in casual play, please when messaging be clear in your interest. Make sure you introduce yourself, explain you interest and have read my full profile. |
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I have been dating a fair amount and am stymied by the lack of manners people have. If we have plans to meet and you decide for whatever reason not to go through with the meet. Please drop me a note/text/call and tell me so. I will extend the courtesy as well. |
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My father passed on June 11th, therefore do not expect me to be the most responsive on CM this summer. I will pop in occasionally to communicate with known persons and if your message intrigues than perhaps new ones. |
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A week before Shibaricon my father fell ill and off to Alabama I went. I was able to return and make it to Shibaricon Saturday morning. I am a bit burnt out between family stress and the intense Shibaricon work load. Once I have re-charged I will try and respond to the messages I have received. |
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I am in full Shibaricon craziness. Therefore I will answer messages but do not expect to meet or have an in depth exchange until June. |
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Pleasantly surprised my the initial meet up I had yesterday with a sub interested in service. Attractive well mannered fit male, must be a fluke;P |
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Have re-connected with some old playmates and friends which has been good, also spoken to some potential new subjects. CM has redeemed its self to me. |
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I've been back on CM for 24 hours and already stunned by how pushy self proclaimed "submissies/slaves" can be |
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Been a crazy year but am finally catching my breath and making time for the important past times such as BDSM. I will be attending shibaricon sunday/monday.
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I am confident my profile does list a need for a 24/7 live in slave. While I have had live ins in the past I am currently not looking for one.
I am also not looking for the ONE, a submissive to enter into a long term D/s romantic catch all relationship. I am looking for well rounded individuals who are secure and comfortable with themselves and their lives.
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I need a service orientated sub who can handle public interaction in a business vanilla setting. Gender is irrelevant:
you must own business appropriate clothing and possibly evening/cocktail wear.
Duties would include:
being my escort
fetching my drinks
carrying items
my coat and wrap
our transportation
conversing intelligently
looking good
etc...
Dependent upon pre discussed terms this may or may not develop into other D/s dynamics. I will be discreet as we will both be publicly and professionally exposed. It is laos a great opportunity to network your business.
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It is the well dressed submissive that draws my eye. when a person takes care of their appearance it reflects outward and draws me in. I belive then they will take care of my needs even more diligently. I also view any one under my reign a direct refelction of myself, therefore they should exude taste and refinement.
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It has been one of the most busy weeks business wise in a long time. I easily put in 70 this week and am feeling a bit brain dead. if I was in communication with you but have been long in my response of follow up, I expect to get caught up with my correspondance by mid next week.
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I just realized that this Friday 11/7 is the First Free Friday at Sins Center. I may attend is any other locals going?
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I am looking for an occasional play partner and other local kinky folk who like to have real conversations about other topics besides BDSM. For the play partner (s) gender and orientation is irrelevant intelligence and humor a must.
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My travles have been fantastic. I recently have had some personal turmoil and have been trying to pinpoint what I want. I will be redefining my profile searching for a more committed D/s relationship. I have had live in 24/7 situations and I missed the daily adoration and service. This is what I crave daily to be waited upon to see that person intent on my happiness and pleasure, to know they are deicated to my whims and maintenance.
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Summer is starting. I will be in NZ for most of June 2008. I will return to Chicago in July. I will be in SF in Sept for a wedding and Boston in Oct for business. Other travel plans will be updated as they happen. I am usually open to meeting like minded indiviuals for chat or more when traveling. Those local I am looking for some bondage sluts and WOMAN/GIRLS for role play games.
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Have been in the OC and just returned. I am currently not taking any applications for any playe mates.
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I hope as spring slowly awakens from the slumber, I to shall breathe a great sigh and fall back into my wicked ways.
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Work exploded into mega overtime and no life, but is calming down. I am working my way back through my emails and will be responding again.
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It seems my email traffic has picked up tenfold this last week. If you are waiting upon notice from me you may have been buried in my inbox.....and I know a few of you would love to be buried in my box........
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I am contemplating hitting a Burlesque show Saturday night and possibly going to GD.
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It's like deja vu back in Chicago and it's cold.......Fl was uneventful, the slave I had use of our time slots didn't mesh. I did have a very sucessfull business trip though. I have possible trips to the following areas throughout the year. Anahiem, Berkley, SF, boston, Colorado, possible NYC, Portland, Seattle and I can't remember where else. The only definites for now are Anahiem in March and New Zealand in June.
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Back in Chicago and it is COLD!!!!!! But I am off to FL for Tuesday and Wed and have the use of a slave there, so at least I again will balance business with pleasure:). I have been dealing with an ex slave who I am on good terms with. She had moved across country and entered in a contract (against my advice) and great drama has followed. We all have been in that place of wanting that ideal situation but, we must temper it with reality. If it is right, there should be no rush. Time is the most inportant investment in any relationship, especially D/s.
I had advised moving there as a trial for 6 months, upon the completion of she would either sign the contract or move on. She chose to move out there and sign the contract and be collared immediately. Not even a month later she is in a situation where she has given her owner control of her considerable finances (half of which have been withdrawn) along with her identification etc.
Please if you believ you have found the one or household of your fantasies, is it so difficult to take the time to know them? Better to open a joint account and deposit you living expenses for the trial period. I f I chose I could of take advatage of many people both o/l and r/t, but I don't.
It just frustrates me to see someone I know who has great potential in the right situation to be exploited.
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San Diego has gone vey well both with business and pleasure. The weather has been wonderful. I will be back in Chicago on Wed evening and then of to FL next week,
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I will be on the road 12-16th of Jan. I am unsure how much o/l time I will be investing. I will be in San Diego and I will be in Jacksonville, FL 22-23.
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Why is't there sailing on the checklist? Its a sport and can be a hobby. They have fishing but no sailing WTF!!!
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The coffee went well. It was nice to meet some new faces. I am hoping to attend a scotch and food paring dinner this week and maybe one or two nights of the boxing championships.
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ClubFEM is a support and social group for submissive men and Dominant Woman. I will be hosting the Coffee Night this month. Coffee Night is a chance for those who are new or a bit shy to come out to a public place and have coffee and chat. if oyu are not a memeber please join at:
Chicago-ClubFEM<at>yahoogroups<dot>com
ClubFEM-Chicago Chapter Coffee
Night
Tuesday, October 16. 2007 at the
Starbuck's on Kedzie & Wilson from around 6:30.
RSVP to the group list if you are coming.
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I have redone my profile look for it in the next few days
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If you desire to contact me; read through the entire profile/ journal and take the time to write me a proper introduction and letter. If not you will be ignored and banned from further communication.
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I am considerign putting the service guild on hold. I have not been able to dedicate the time needed. I do have the domain name and the website is slowly working, but haven't had many other dominants willing to step in help with the building and orginization. I will redo a profile for it solely in the next few weeks and one for my personal use. I did come upon an interesting idea this week.
-Submissive/slave foster Dom/mes. If you were in between situations but didn't want to lose your edge would you serve any household as long as there were references and a short term written agreement? Dominants would you take n a sincere slave/submissive who was in between households and assist with thier training and growth?
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Isn't is amazin how quickly the summer can fly by. I have been increasingly frustrated with the length of projected recovery time for my injury. Looks like 4-6 months until I am 100%. So no sailing, biking, horseback etc.. I have to be very conscous of my body mechanics when engaged in any physical activity. I am currently in Physical therapy twice a week and with a Personal trainer twice a week. Whew!! Needless to say I am in search of a few subs/slaves who can assist 2-4 times per month, with either cleaning or errands.
On plus side I will be hosting a podcast show for alesbianslife.com The show is called Forbidden and is interviews of woman who challenge conventional views with thier lifestyle, profession, art or convictions. If anyone is interested in being interviewed or knows someone please feel free to contact me.
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I haven't had much time of late to answer e-mails, but I will. If you respond with a well written genuine note, I will write back.
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Yesterday my street was flooded up to the bottom porch step. It was a bit surreal, but I did spend the evening thinking of rowers and small boats, nude and sweating rowing to the tempo I set.....
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I realized that I never announced that I had collared one of my boys. I also have my pup in NZ coming at the end of July for 4 weeks so it will be a busy summer. For the Chicagoland folks who go to events, I hope to run across you at all the various events this summer. I will be doing a few workshops at lagarou.org/campout_2007.htm - 6k
there will be ponies there so far 5 have signed up. The website doesn't list ponies but there will be a small group of ponies in thier own grove. The workshops i will be doign will be BDSM safety and Rituals of Blood and Blades.
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I had an interesting conversation today over Lattes about
the motivation of what we do. My input to the conversation went along these
lines.
-I think in part that when I am consciously in Domme mode a part me is
projecting all my self perceived failures upon the person I am focusing upon.
Similar in part to when a submissive needs the time to let go and give control
to someone else. That they need to punished for their own failures and
shortcomings.
This has lead to many interesting discussions today with others I have encountered
that are in the lifestyle. I am curios to what my collarme people’s thoughts/opinions
on the motivations behind what we do/crave.
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Been a rough month, had a rough fall on some rough waters and injured my pelvis been very slow going. The healing is till a month away so my activities are limited. Moved into a wonderful victorian larger place and will be having soem private events over the summer. Had a waonderful priate themed bbq this past weekend. We had pirates a plenty along with a lovely serving wench. I am looking for a regular house person or two. Minimum of twice monthly cleaning probably on Sunday afternoon. Lots of woodwork to polished and dusted. If interested please contact me with experience and any local references you may have.
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The weather has been beautiful and the sailing as well. My dreams of having galley full of slaves grow with each sailing season. I was pleasantly surpised to run into a slave of past recently at a local event. She an I have maintained contact and looking forwad to utilizing her to her full potential. I also have had some nibbles for the July leather event that will have some pony as well. Very excited at the prospect of ponies in the woods this summer. Sounds like I will be packing lots of sunscreen and bug repellent.
I will be moving residences at the end of the month and attending Shibaricon as well. Shibaricon.com is a Japanese rope convention, I am the volunteer wrangler and will b on hand if anyone wishes to meet up there. Since the remainder of may will be busy, I may be a bit curt in my responses, give me time and I will respond more completly at another time.
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Will be attending a camping event end of July. This is a leather event geared towarg transgender, but the space outside is fantastic and they are welcoming PONIES!!! so anyone into pony play who has been itching to go outside, let me know
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Life is crazy as usual, but stability lurks in chaos. Will be moving at the end of May to larger space and will be looking for a house boy/girl. Once a week on either Wed pm or Sunday afternoon. Service orientated sub who is open to service training. Gender orientation, age etc..is irrelevant.
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Due to some family illness I will be unable to conduct any interviews or training until further notice. I am only available right now on Sunday afternoons. I will be contacting the interested parties I have communicated with. I will be referring them to another local Domme who worked with me in training and utilizing service subs. Feel free to e-mail me with any sincere inquires. Random solicitations with out bios and contact info will be deleted and blocked.
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We are conducting the next round of interviews this coming Sunday evening. If you are unable to make it, then I have sometime Wed the 2nd open. If I gave you my personal e-mail address and you have not responded, you will loose you window of opportunity after this week. If you did respond and did not recive an e-mail from me. Please do so again, so as to be interviewed this weeeknd.
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The applicants we have chosen, have done well thus far. They have been hard working, grateful and appreciative of our attentions. They have seemed to enjoy having a variety of households to switch between. I am interviewing an addistional 3 today and once I have dealt with all applicants up to today, I will be closing the process until August. If we gain more dominants who are committed to protocol and houseboys, we will -reopen the pool. Do not apply if you are inexperiened, are not prepared to fill out an application, have a formal meeting, provide your name, a phone number and in some cases references. I have been told that meetings etc.. are not what the lifestyle is about. If you wish access to my home and personal life be prepared to give me your personal info. If you wish to hide behind your alias, then stay in the chat rooms or go to any of the various clubs and/or fetish parties in this city.
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I hope that everyone else had a pleasant holiday weekend. I continued my education of the boy from the previous weekend. This weekend was lessons in following directions, House chores, public presence, slapping, hair pulling, biting and gauging Domme response. I was very enjoyable. It is a pity he lives in St. Louis, guess I'll have to find a local playtoy, that I find amusing. Tonight is the meeting of the dominants and a few interviews as well. I am still reciving mail from applicants who felt no need to hurry and respond. If you are not hearing back from me, it means you will have to wait for the next round. I went to 2 kinky BBQ's this weekend and could of gone to the third but choose family over playtime. I also had the pleasure of having a lesbian couple perform live sex acts on my living room floor for my viewing. It was HOT!!!!
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I am looking forward to the next few days. Hopefully will be holding a few more interviews on Sunday. There are so many kinky get togethers where do I start. It seems the boy from Saturday is returning this weekend for round two, should be interesting what new torments I can devise. I wish all a plesant holiday weekend. I will be holding off on any new applicants for now, so we can focus on the ones we have.
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Interviewed a few more canidates last evening. Find is so enjoyable the differences each one has. Not only in age, appearance and professions, but in thier demeanors. All have been well behaved and prompt. I did have a work related dinner which turned into a druken crawl. Only a few hours of sleep and still feelign all that scotch, sakle and beer I ingested. Scotch and sushi prehaps not my best combo. I am out at work as far as my inclinations and a former intern who is in his early 20's seemed very facinated by the house boy concept. I found his gaze on me often with a half smile. He asked for my number and said we had to get together in the near future for a drink. I just can't seem to resist corrupting the young.......
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The households in question reside on the Northside of Chicago. If you wish to be considered, make sure your intro is articulate and detailed, you follow directions and have patience.
I have been deleting mail w/ no reponse due to the following:
Do not send numerous e-mails to follow up on your app, 2 lines of what you want or pics of your nude body. Unless you live near enough to travel her on our schedule do not bother applying. I realize many can relocate but if you are interested in relocating to a large city then do.
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Plese be patient I have mnay requests and it will take time to wade through them all. I enjoyed a yummy boy last night. I had met him at a BDSM event last summer and he had e-mailed he was going to be in town. We hung out and then I called over a few friends and then the fun began. He ddin't have much experience but wanted to try it all and I did my best. between 7pm -9am (of course I had a little nap in betwwen) the boy experienced the following from myself and 2 others. OTK, paddles, flogging, caning, face slapping, bondage, blindfolds, tickling, biting, licking, suxing, hair pulling, orgasm restriction, orgasm on demand, punching, puppy play, wax, knives, fear play, ice, foot worship, begging, scratching, sensation play, etc.... what a night:). He had to catch a plane and now I am looking for more tonight
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I have returned to Chicago late last evening. Thank you to the numerous people who have responded to my ad for a house boy etc.. I will continue to take applications until the Dominants have fulfilled thier household needs. I currently have a group of 4 women who are in need of in home services. THESE ARE NOT SEXUAL SERVICES. If you are a Dominant who is in need of in home service please feel free to e-mail me. Please write a minimum of a paragraph in letter form when applying. treat the process and myself as a lifestyle Human Resources. Thank you. |
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If you are from a distsnce that would require relocation. This is not a full time position. I currently do not have the time to respond to each applicant from a far distance. I will respond but it will be at a later date.
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I will be out of town until the 23rd of June. I will respond to any e-mails when I do. If you are submitting an application for the house posiition please include your availabilty and a brief bio. There will be interviews scheduled for late June early July. These will be in a public place if you are selected for a face to face meeting you will recieve another e-mail addy for further instructions. You will then recieve a form to be filled out and brought with to the date and time slot you choose. We look forward to meeting each of you. There will be multiple positions to fill.
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