To finally admit and submit to my desires is like sinking into water. i am told i can breath underwater and the water feels natural and supportive but it is such a foreign concept. i sometimes surface gasping for breath only to return to the depths, deeper then i went before.
My desire is to find someone who might be willing to explore my need to be tied up and beat, my need to submit. I am interested in shibari, the beauty and meditative state in induces thrills me.
I had my first experience recently, with a very skilled man.
It would please me if sex was not part of it, initially, nor as an expectation. I find the whole experience to be very arousing but i prefer to have sex with someone i am in "love" with, for lack of a better term.