Hi I believe that females are great creation of good, I s my desire to serve them with my soul

I am 31 but look like so younger , well educated , master degree in IT . I always like to be under control of female I feel this whe I was 7 , I like to be feminized by my desire woman . I am straight and I do not like to have any exp with man.i just only like to be under control in privet life , I am looking for long term relationship, I am so scared to start this life style , but if you help me it could be great