I had one of those nights where my dream were haunted and restless.
I thought about you a lot, and prayed even more for you and I.
Last evening, I was spent nearly a hour on the Phone with my stepdaughter
It been a very long time since we talked and laughed so much so hard. We
revisited some old memories. But after I hung up a thought occurred to me.
I was at one time Sir Galahad, with a suit of armor. I did slay dragons and
Chase monsters from underneath her bed. I realized that fathers get but
one opportunity to be the knight in shining armor. Unless they are lucky enough
to have more than one daughter.
While I am in no way old enough to be your Dad, you are at least 10 years younger
Than I. you shared your pains, both past and present. I still cry at times, but not for a very long time. I cried when you told me about your biting, and how you endure pain,
And can control the tears. You will think me a wuss or wimp, I am willing to risk that
To tell you, how sorry I am your childhood was stolen from you. I am sorry that you
May or may not be able to share those memories with your dad like I did with my step daughter. I cried because his one shot at being a hero was squandered. And that his Armor is now a cloak of shame.
I am sorry that he cannot see, what I see when I look at you, the longing for a happy ending, the reassurance that all will be ok. The assurance that you will always have a safe harbor, and refuge from life’s storms.
While you have sent me private pics of yourself, I cannot and will not discard my armor.
I will not be in the line of 100 men who want to fuck you and fuck over you. Because
I still have my armor, and my honor and a 32 Year old Daughter of still thinks her step-dad is a hero. And I am the measure by which she will measure all men that come into her life!
I want to be your friend, that will visit when you are sick, or when you need to talk.
I love to talk to you. But it needs to be different, I want you to feel safe with me. I want you to know he who you have yet to meet is still on the way. I want you to measure him
Who ever he may be, by the way I treat you!