|
|
|
|
| Hello. Thanks for checking me out. Hopefully this means You are Female that is dominant or is interested in being dominant. i am a submissive male seeking a type of relationship and/or play partners, with a Woman who is dominant or interested in beoing dominant.
i have had submissive, masochistic desires and interest since my early teens and have perued FemDom relationships and play partners on and off all my adult life. i have had many "play" experiences but a Female Led Relationship has always aluded me. Part of my problem was my own tendency to waver on my willingness to commit on that leval. presumably giving up some or all of the quite active "regular" life that i was living.
About five years ago i had an epiphaney as aresult of the latest and hardest heartbreak i was handed by a lovely young Woman who i was head over heals for. i realized that most of my regular love life or attempts at having one have all followed basically the same patern. i fall hard, get rejected, find myself unable to except it, try again even harder pulling out all the stops and finally gerting shattered. i finally saw the truth of how pathetic i really am, leading me to realize that i am unworthy and usuitable for normal love and it really is only love expressed through submission and servitude that i am cut out for. It so happens that this is something i'm rather hardwired for anyway and is in need of addressing no matter what. So, far too late in life, i am once and for all committed to living a 24/7 Female Dominated life style in one or another and i am on the lookout for it everywhere.
i have come also to fully embrace the the identity of "sissy". It also comes naturally for me because i learned that i loved gender bending when i was in my 20s and would cross dress with any excuse. Now i have gotten to where i need no excuse and tend to go out sissied up frequently. Doing this is also one of the ways i am trying to send out signal that i am a submissive.
i am also a masochist and am able and willing to take pretty extreme pain. i have never begged for mercy nor have used a safe word because i believe in being under total control and in submitting 100%. This also goes for humiliation and degredation, for i believe that i both need and deserve all the suffering She wishes for me. Much more importantly though, may She find joy, empowerment, catharsis....by doing so and knowing that She need have no moral quams because i am greatful for it.
The ideal Female Led relationship in my mind and fantacies is one that comes as close to total as possible. It need not be a romantic or sexual relationship at all, at least not from Her perspective (i would want and need however to be in love with Her and highly arrowsed by Her, even if i cannot be Her lover or even sex slave). i want to be Her property, Her slave, for Her to use and abuse at will and without any imposed limit. While She would have every right to use me sexually, i suspect She would find it more fitting that i be denied normal sex entirely and that i be a cuckhold and kept in locked chastity most of the time.
|
|
|
|
