Imagine my surprise when a friend started talking to me about these things and not in the context of something ridiculous or sad but in terms of his happy marriage. I was very interested. As I read more and learned more I was very pleased to see myself, not as a victim or a weak person, but as a submissive person who had not ever been able to embrace that side of myself. Instead of seeking out a Dominant man that could provide a good balance to my submissive nature, I had, in the past, settled for a bully that took advantage of that nature. I was afraid, really. Afraid that I was so desperate for answers about why I stayed in an abusive marriage that I was willing to embrace anything that came along. I examined things from all sorts of points of view and kept coming up with a single thought. This is me. This is who I am. I need to learn to live in such a way as to not deny the basic fact that I am a submissive person. It is a great feeling to know myself at long last. I hope to find the right person to share the rest (and best) of my life with.