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I'm 30, recently single and looking for a play partner or better yet a friend with benefits. I am NOT looking for a LTR at this point, though I don't rule it out later. I'm also NOT looking for a one-time encounter. I tried that and it just wasn't satisfactory.
As the title implies I'm interested in BDSM, specifically dominating my partner. I've been lucky enough to have a lot of fun doing that with my last partner. I'm open to the idea of being topped though I don't believe that I'm at all submissive myself.
This leads into the whole discussion of dominant vs. top and submissive vs. bottom, which I've had with friends of mine several times. To my mind the reasons that I identify as a dominant are psychological more than anything else. However I'm very fair-minded and I believe that if I'm going to try it out on someone else then I ought to experience it myself (if physically possible and with exceptions *grins*). Therefore the willingness to bottom at least on a trial basis. And who knows? Maybe I'll find out that I enjoy it!
I really enjoy the tension, the giving of pleasure, and pain until the pain becomes pleasure. What really gets me going is to take my partner someplace she can't go by herself, to let her experience without worrying about conventions or labels and to make her feel good about what we did together.
I love the intensity of it, the feeling of power. And having had it once, I have a hard time seeing how I could be in a relationship again and not want it. So here I am.
I want to explore this side of myself. Also there's no two ways about it, I'm a horny bastard and I love sex :) I have a VERY strong appetite and while it hasn't been all THAT long I'd like to get out there.
It's an interesting conundrum, here are these things that I know I like to do, and I know there's people out there who like them too. At the same time sex with a stranger is bound to be a little awkward, and chances are it's not going to be the single greatest event of your experience (though its always possible).
And thats even more true with BDSM because there's such a trust component involved. You have to trust your partner not to hurt you...or to hurt you but only a certain amount. To tie you up, but let you go at the end of the scene. To take you to the point where you'll say anything, do anything just to get a little more, and to bring you back safely. Thats a lot to ask of a stranger.
I like to think that I can provide a safe place for someone who wants to explore that kind of trust. Honesty will be key for both parties.
So heres what I'm looking for: Single or polyamorous. I've no intention of butting into someone's marriage/relationship without the concern of parties involved. If you're a couple looking to share, we can talk. Female, either experienced submissive or curious, doesn't matter. For that matter if you're just a kinkster who knows what you enjoy and would like a regular partner that could be fun too.
I won't say body type isn't important because physical attractiveness is always important. However I've got a pretty wide-ranging taste. If you're interested in what I'm talking about, email me. I have plenty of pics and I'll be happy to trade. You should be between 21 and 35 years old...any younger and I'd feel like a child molester. Height, not important. Hair color, eyes, etc not important, though long or curly hair is a definite plus, as are redheads.
What is important is that you be serious. Don't do it for a joke, don't spam me with paysites that you host your pictures on. Anyone real and upfront I'll have an honest conversation with.
Where I see this going? It depends. If there's a physical connection I'd want to explore that. If there's an emotional connection too thats even better. I believe sex is at its best when your emotions are tied into it and I imagine thats even more true in BDSM than in vanilla sex.
What I wont do: As another poster said: no scat, children, permanent marking, or blood drawn. I don't go for humiliation. I'm not a sadist, so my appreciation of pain is limited to whatever amount makes you feel good. And number one on the list of things that I won't do, (or accept from a partner) is lie.
What I like: Oral, anal, bondage, fisting (I have fairly big hands), spanking, toys, roleplay, rough sex, gags. None of these are requirements, nor are they things I would necessarily want to do on a first ecounter. Slow is good in this sort of thing.
I have some toys, you're encouraged to bring along your own. If you have suggestions or requests, I promise not to dismiss em off the bat, and chances are I'll be enthusiastic. I'm a very equal opportunity sort of person, and I'm willing to try most things at least once. Safe sex only of course. Since I hope to make this a more than once event I will probably take it slow at first, to allow us to get to know each other.
Logistics: I have my own place, nothing fancy but the walls are thick and I don't have to share it with anyone else. If you're willing to travel, I can host. Or, if you can host I'm willing to travel a reasonable distance, an hour or so. I've got a pretty flexible schedule. If you're comfortable with playing in public then I'm a member of both Black Rose and BESS.
The way I see this working is, you respond to this ad, preferably with pictures. I'll reply back with additional pictures of myself. If you like what you see, you'll get my cell # and we can start arranging a meeting. Meet in a neutral setting, (coffee or something similarly lowkey) and see what develops. If things go well, I'd like to have it become a regular thing, because sex is SO much better once you know your partner a bit.
So...if you've read to the end of this then I must have at least sparked your interest...so why not write? If it doesn't work out then the worst that will happen is you've wasted a couple of hours of time and $5 for coffee. For that matter, I'll buy your coffee if you prefer :)
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