I logged on this week, which to my surprise has been exactly 3 years since I was last on. Mercy how time flies and how life changes and changes us.

Change is not always growth but yes its been a strange and busy few years. I've completed my master's degree (somehow I feel it should be a MISTRESS degree, ha!) gotten divorced, removed myself from the scene, changed jobs, purchased a house and those are all the big events that obscure the smaller ones that are no less significant, but somehow more personal and too personal to share.

I've changed my stripes to some degree, I love the evolution of me.

The brutality I felt before while I was claiming my power and myself has now learned patience and that's a beautifully wicked thing.

What I desire more than anything is the subtlety of  dominance and submission, the exchange that goes beyond and is in every look and gesture; The intelligent and  covert exchange of power. I want a strong male and a soft female and to play with the differences and what submission looks like in each.

It's good to be back.

In seeking congruence in our lives between the vanilla and the essence of ourselves in BDSM, how does it work for you submissives? I know how it works for me and in my life the more I engage my dominance the more it appears in my vanilla life. So those of you alphas in vanilla, who see to be submissive in the scene, whats necessary to the transition? I have found that alpha's can bottom but few can truly be submissive, regardless of what they think, the alpha permeates all they do.  Do you need to be broken?

Engaging in BDSM..."takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and yet know we cannot live within."  
 

“The most important things are the hardest to say, because words diminish them” – S. King

I can't tell you enough how much I've enjoyed joining the public scene.
The dynamic that others bring in watching is electric.

But lets be clear its more than a performance, more than a show. If you take the time to really engage your sub in public their surrender is magnified and your dominance the same.

It shocks me the number of folks afraid to come out and play...what can be better than meeting a lot of great NORMAL people who love what you love?

Come out and play at the local clubs, its both less frightening and more fun than you might imagine!