Writing in a journal is one of those things an organized writer usually does, so here is a start in what works for me in real life. I work in computers every day, but most of the work I do starts with an idea someplace. Usually, there is a need in the business end of things, and I, as a computer guy, have to find a solution to it. Some people would call it the role of business analyst...I don't go that far. What is it you want to be able to do with this database function, Mrs. Robinson, and how is it going to be used? I always learn to listen to what it is the person is trying to accomplish. Knowing from my experiences that there is a bag of tools that I possess, I can solve certain things using this set of tools. It is the same in real life. I was dating a girl that loved being helpless and vulnerable, so we constructed a playdate around her need to feel helpless and vulnerable, but safe.

So we started with what the boundaries were...and a safe word that would stop all when it felt unsafe. So, we proceeded to go to our local adult store that carried the accessories we thought we needed to start with...a spreader bar and some bondage cuffs to start. We could play anywhere, so it was conveniently packed in a bag, and we could play when we went someplace on vacation. She, of course, had a nice assortment of dildos and vibrating thingies...but she wanted to experience deeper sexual pleasure...she liked being cuffed and spread on the bed...and I used it to my advantage, I must confess...it was a nice feeling to learn new things and experiencing new sensations. Most of our play concentrated on her pleasure, even though she was bound, she was still the object of pleasure...she had recently discovered her g-spot, and we used the wiper method with the spreader bar to hit the right angles, and she rewarded me with a very fulfilling sight...it was incredible to see the entire thing as it happened...and yet reach the goal(multiple 0's). We actually achieved a squirty gushy stage(big turn-on)....but like all long term relationships I have ever been in, she got transferred to Omaha, Nebraska...which means I have had a taste of the bondage/Dom scene....but I want more. I am not a big pain giver...the only screaming I want is in the throws of passion...(big turn-on)...but I can't seem to find the right sub to explore this with. So I have started to build a set of skills, but I don't care to share these with just anyone...it has to be someone that is worthy and special. Does that mean monogomy? I think a person can experience more than one love at a time, but that is where the interesting questions start to come up...is a threesome with three friends going to be about jealousy or is it just an experience that adults just have to experience just to say they did it. I don't see being a serial monogamous...so I would rather have it out in the open...rather than dating one girl one week and breaking up with her the next week so she can date her ex who she still has "feelings for"..why not just be open about the whole thing...I'll be honest, my heart is open to love...but I don't mind sharing an experience with love interests with a close friend or two. Comments?