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2/24/24 at 3:13 PM:

I'm always ok to Explore any ideas, everyone who contacts me  as long as your not to far-away.

The life Style for me has to work around my working week and private life.

This is a Secret part of my lifestyle and has to stay that way.


2/24/24 at 2:42 PM:

I don't have a photo on my profile because they are completely exposed, and can be viewed by people that do not have a CS account. I'm more than happy to share photos directly...


2/24/24 at 1:20 PM:

I don't want to grow up


i want to grow✨


in my Master's garden🪴🌱


i don't want to be independent


i want to be dependent


on the right one(s)


2/24/24 at 11:13 AM:

Lunar New Year Play Party


It was so fun going to SAKE (one of the Dungeons close to me) and get flogged & paddled on a St Andrews Cross in a Jail Cell! Perhaps a bit anachronistic, but hey, i'll take it!

 

my friend Grail did a great job. Although he is not new to attending events (play parties, munches, classes) he IS new at playing. Since our first practice session earlier this month, he has been practicing at home with his floggers and it showed. (He is the person i wrote about in my recent entry, "A Unique Opportunity To Give Back").

 

We got there early in order to be able to get a nice area to do our scene and avoid the crowd (noise and distractions). He did a great job and the few times he made slight mistakes, he noticed and corrected himself. He communicated with me a lot and, after a warm up, was confident enough to give me harder strikes in between the more mellow ones. He also used different floggers as well as a "sensation stick" i had gifted him (a long wooden back scratcher which is fun, stingy and versatile), my Bat-Crop and my leather paddle. 

 

He decided to end the scene after a while when he noticed his aim was getting a bit off. While in aftercare mode, i told him at that point, he could have repositioned me if that would have helped. (There was a bench/bed in the cell, too). He hadn't thought of that. 

 

Repositioning the bottom can be a useful thing during a scene for many reasons: the Top is able to have access to different areas of the body, as well as have different angles for striking. It can be fun to use different positions within a scene to create a more full, varied experience. But, overall, i am glad that he chose to end the scene when he was starting to feel "off"---this is part of a Top's responsibility to not play "over their level", in order to help mitigate risk of a mis-strike landing somewhere bad.

 

Later in the night, Grail also told me a bit about his perspective of the scene. How it is so different to have to be paying attention and focusing on what he is doing. How, when he went to choose a different implement, he likened it to choosing a different paint brush or color to apply to his "canvas". Creating art. Conducting a symphony. Leading an experience. All things that us bottoms and subs love our Tops and Dominants for! 

 

We were also able to meet up with a lovely young lady who had messaged me a few weeks ago on fetlife. She is brand new to BDSM and attending events and was so nervous to go to her first play party! But by the end of the night she was smiling, laughing, observing scenes, talking with all kinds of people, and hugging her new friends goodbye. 

 

It really is amazing how, for a group of people that like to hurt each other, we are generally pretty friendly and mellow.

 

Thank you Grail for the fun, relaxing, exciting and cathartic scene last night. i really needed it. i hope that you enjoyed the experience as much as i did. 


2/24/24 at 10:27 AM:

I have had to reject a fair number of people on this site.  I always try to be polite and gentle about it.  And there have been a couple of people who rejected me, though most folks seem to just ghost me when they lose interest.  


Today, I met a fellow on here who was intelligent, charming, and had most of the qualities I look for in a sub.  We moved our conversation over to fetlife and things seemed to be going quite well.  


And then, very suddenly, he said "I'm not interested" and blocked me on both sites.  It was a shock to the system and, honestly, hurt my self-esteem quite a bit.  To be so abruptly and completely rejected after a very positive conversation was jarring to say the least.  


I don't know if he got cold feet or if there was something about me that turned him off.  And I will likely never know.  


2/24/24 at 9:54 AM:

I like to compliment those who ask for humiliation


2/24/24 at 9:17 AM:

I am now with someone on a FLR basis

2024


2/24/24 at 7:20 AM:

Why is it everyone thinks that intrest and likes are set in stone.

Change is a building block of life. Trying something new is betyer than sitting around and wondering. People list likes thats what they are likes a manifestation of pleasure. But if a sub or slave is true to their heart and of place a Dom/Domme could instruct and teach them and like the end result. 

Life is taking uncomfrotable situations and making them either fun or terrifying. 

Just a thought. 


2/24/24 at 5:43 AM:

!IMPORTANT CLARIFICATION

I'm looking for someone initially to come in as a cleaner / domestic drudge for a few hours either weekly or fortnightly and then go away again. I have no intention of putting anyone up overnight, nor am I initially looking for any more than stated above although whoever is chosen will be subjected to strict oversight by myself and be suitably punished should they not perform to the required standard.

With that in mind, you MUST be based in South East UK, either in Kent or able to asily get to mid Kent from where you live, so SE London, Essex, Surrey or Kent itself.

I would have amended my profile to reflect this but as that then means my profile disappears for up to a week I've been compelled to add it here.

Goddess Abyssia


2/24/24 at 5:31 AM:

MY FLICKR FEED

https://flickr.com/photos/199887324@N08/


2/24/24 at 4:57 AM:

I'm really curious about some thing why do you think the submissives on this site claim to be interested in a total power exchange female lead relationship, and they put in their profile that they are willing to relocate and yet they are unwilling to make the effort to come to me to meet me to see if there's chemistry. I don't understand. From my perspective, I don't want to put a lot of time and energy into someone without having met them in person. Once I've met them in person, I can determined whether or not I I feel there is chemistry as well as other important nonverbal boxes that I need to check. I'm curious please share with me you're thinking around what it means to have in your profile that you're willing to relocate and what your expectations are of a dominant who is looking for a submissive to relocate to them. I am not an unreasonable person but if my expectations don't match up with your expectations, then we need to have a conversation about it and what I get instead is ghosted I'm just trying to navigate finding an honest to goodness submissive who really wants to live in this  Lifestyle, As a submissive to a very controlling, dominant. I just wanna have an honest, transparent dialogue with those of you who desire the opportunity to serve me and possibly be in relationship with me and so I need you to stop being so fragile and actually state what your expectations are around this process of meeting and figuring this all out.

 

I'm feeling super frustrated but I'm not gonna give up because I'm looking for love and I'm gonna find it

 

good day


2/24/24 at 1:17 AM:

On days like today as I cross the threshold of the door, I am greeted. stripped directly. No moments pass- the bath has been run. I am stepping into the hot water. Being cleansed of the day. Clean from disappointment,  and separated from those who rob me of tranquility. These unnamed robbers, I curse them and you demonize them in my favor. Tandem pursuits, aligned we are- until the moment all the demons are slayed. Restored once more, I am guided from the waters, dried and lead to bed- where you feast until peace prevails once more. 


2/23/24 at 10:51 PM:

Yes I am a lesbian. None of that matters when I am owned.  I need to obey. I m for lack of a better term very old fashioned.  Believe things should be a certain way. Regardless of my preferences.  


2/23/24 at 6:38 PM:

Blind Pride

 

In the realm of artistry, I once stood tall,

My pride was a shield, my downfall, a fall.

Blinded by past victories, I failed to see,

The flaws in my work, the missed melody.

 

As a martial artist, swift and strong,

My ego guided, my judgment wrong.

Fierce in form, yet gentle inside,

Arrogance clouded, humility denied.

 

Pride painted a canvas, bold and bright,

But truth lurked in shadows, out of sight.

I stumbled and fell, with no one to blame,

My ego shattered, a humbling flame.

 

Now I see clearly, lessons hard-learned,

Humbled and wiser, my pride adjourned.

As an artist, as a warrior, I stand anew,

Guided by truth, with a heart pure and true.


2/23/24 at 6:28 PM:

I reckon it's time that i update this thingy. I've been on here a lot of yrs. Im a brat. I playfully push buttons. Im also a slave. Both need structure and guidance. Both need attention. Both need to know they are protected and that their well-being is top of his mind. Im married to a vanilla. He's a good man, he just has no idea  what this lifestyle is bout. After many yrs together, he still thinks it's bout kinky sex and abuse. He just can't see the beauty that can be there. The bond... the trust. I'm not looking to leave him. Im not looking to be your play thingy on the side. Im looking for someone online to take me under his wing. Give me tasks... help me put a little bit more control in my life. I have the mindset of a little and a slave... and I'm the boss. That's just not right. I need help. If you only want to play, go away. Plz don't waste my time or yours. Let's see what kind of adventure we can start. 


2/23/24 at 6:24 PM:

Any daddy's out there into the diaper aspect of ab-dl. That can teach me about this kink.  Also open to medical play or who know hypnosis and can help with some fantasies. 


2/23/24 at 5:45 PM:

Heart Racing

Body Shaking


Overhwelming Sensations

A Tidalwave of Emotions


Tears Streaming

Sobs Racking her Body


Never Ending


2/23/24 at 5:19 PM:

i'm Sorry for Being 

i'm sorry for being Clingy. Emotional. Needy.

Annoying. A waste of space. Stressful. Wierd.

Quiet. Distant. Ugly. Imperfect. Strange. Different. 

Unlovable.  Useless. Worthless. Lonely. Depressed.

Boring. Sad. Helpless. A lost cause. Broken.

Defeated. me


 


2/23/24 at 3:27 PM:

🚛 🚚 🚛 🚚 🚛 🚚 🚛 🚚 🚛 🚚

1/14/24 🚚 🚛 Beautiful Snow in Kentucky. 🚛 🚚  to bad I don't like being cold.🥶
1/19/24 🚛 Dyersburg TN Beautiful sunny day roads are clear. Enjoying the day.
1/24/24 🚚 Santa Rose, New Mexico Beautiful. Little rain at the moment.
1/25/24 🚛  Kingman, AZ A nice morning..
1/29/24 🚚 🚚 Springfield, Ohio Chilly
1/30/24 🚛 🚛 Dyersburg, TN Trying to relax at the moment. 🙃
2/2/24 🚚 Zanesville, Ohio Enjoying a little break.
2/7/24 🚛 🚚 Portland, OR
2/14/24 Happy Valentine's Day.🌺 Have A Beautiful Day.
2/22/24 Dyersburg, Tennessee today.
2/23/24 Paulsboro, NJ Dinner and back on the road.



I drive long hours. I'm a OTR truck driver. Can't handle that more on.
With that said. My internet goes in and out all the time on what area I am in. Get over it. May take Me a bit to get back to you.

Just driving along 🚚 🚛

 


2/23/24 at 7:18 AM:

But but I was what you wanted..  laughs did I ask ypu to be? No.

Why do I want someone who pretends or acts? Of course I can direct a scene but an act is an act.

Once you have locked into a soul with real responses. Acting is just a imagination of life.

Have fun and be real..


2/23/24 at 5:29 AM:

I haven't written much poetry this year so far, as I am editing my manuscript.  I could do with some amusing company at my local munch in March. Do drive and talk to me there. A cute young guy who drives and is funny, amuse me for the evening.

 

This site isn't funny today.....yawn.


2/23/24 at 1:06 AM:

I'm looking for someone into medical play and hypnosis .


2/23/24 at 12:21 AM:

I will NOT write a huge message on any first contacts I make simply because I WILL NOT WASTE TIME/ENERGY WHEN THE PERSON MAY NOT REPLY....IF you do reply to a message or contact me I WILL write more but not unawarranted in first contact. Also despite the rubbish I see people write here about themseles most of them are clearly  VACUOUS and pschologically parasitic liars and DO NOT deserve my time. I also see lots who write nonsense about how spiritual and kind they are etc but kill and eat animals and other things that contradiict what they write ...lol, right, pardon me if I puke at the bullshit 


2/22/24 at 9:45 PM:

it doesnt matter about your size shape height or weight or the size of what between your legs or your chest or your age. everyone deserves someone it not what on the outside that matter to those that think looks and size of cock or size of tits and size of body are nothing but shallow people . it is what is on the inside tht matters a persons character their heart their kindness the way they treat everyone their emotions towards people that is all that matters.


2/22/24 at 8:49 PM:

Yesterday I decided to become a workacholic by getting a secound job. l just need to make ends meet, so far a creepy dom wants to meet someplace private in a public place. I refuse since he hasn't given me any reason to trust his word. Plus my instincts tells me something is off about it. Billy boy is very imperssive. He is built like a viking and have more of a babrian attitude. Though my type is more eloquent and stragetic, i don't mind a warrior to have children with. At least my offspring will be healthy and strong. I still need a husband that is not only a warrior but also diplomatic. A warrior always chooses violence to solve everything. But a king always use violence as a last resort. My mother which we will call queen witch. She decided to make my life harder by stopping taking me to work and made a joke about it to her husband. My father we will call King simp. Now it will be diffcult to fund not only transporation but to buy Lucia's medications. Even with insurance, his medication will be expensive. I am not letting him go without his medication. It is why i decided to get a secoubd job. It scares and worries me because the social climate doesn't treat working women too kindly. It is part of a reason why i need a true dom to marry and able to shoulder my burden with me. I can't abandon Lucia since he has been through so much. He was physically, emotionally and sexually abused. He been through enough and the least i can do is make his life less hell. I promised to take care of him until it becomes too much to handle his mania anymore. I just have to land another job just to make ends meet. I refuse to be reduced to less than nothing. 


2/22/24 at 8:38 PM:

Drowning

 

Unmoored

Untethered 

Lost in the darkness

 

 

Thrashing

Struggling

Being tossed to and fro

Trying to claw her way to the surface

 


Hopeless

Darkness

Drowning


2/22/24 at 8:13 PM:

I have a fair number of prospective submissive guys on here.  Enough to form a stable.  I have already selected one and plan to add more.  But, today I also had to kick one off the island, so to speak.


Don't claim to be submissive if you can't be respectful and honor your prospective Dom(me)'s boundaries.  If all you are looking for is fetish fulfilment, you're not submissive.  And this goes beyond being a brat.  That I don't mind though its not a quality I want in my subs.  If you repeatedly ignore reminders about boundaries and make demands you have some serious misconceptions about this lifestyle.


2/22/24 at 5:12 PM:

Personality is everything!  Almost everything.

Please don't let that statement scare you.  Do you find first impressions scary?  Can't think of what to say?  Not sure how to act?  No worries.  Wear a skirt & blouse outfit.  Stockings are a plus.  Panties are optional.  Be on time and knock on the door.  I will let you, give you a warm hug, and run my hand under your skirt.  No need to thank me yet.  Yes Daddy has a wonderful lap and very strong knees.  Do assume the position.  Nothing like a get-to-know-you spanking to warm things up.  Daddy is so happy with you.  Did you have a long trip getting here?  Traffic terrible?  Well then let's get down to some hardcore play...


2/22/24 at 4:31 PM:

Yet again wasted more time talking to somebody. If I start talking to you and give you my phone number and tell you these are the days I can talk on those are the days I can talk on and no other I have a job and a life and I can only talk on these days which are Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday other than that I work 10 hour shifts and when I get home no I don't want to talk to you because I am tired I have chores to do and a dog to take care of and myself to take care of so if you're not willing to talk on the days I say that I can too bad too sad. No I'm not going to talk to you about what we're going to do together I'm not going to give you jack off fodder. If you want me to do that then you can pay me for it otherwise that is a waste of my time as it is no interest to me whether you get your rocks off or not. If you send me pictures of your cock I'm going to be less interested because I don't care about your pathetic cock I don't care if you send me pictures of your cock inside of a cage especially when I tell you hey don't send me pictures like that unless I ask and you do it anyway it shows me what kind of a slave you are which is not a very good one since you're not good at taking orders


2/22/24 at 4:20 PM:

The erotic madness conveyed by the muse is the worst kind of insanity.


2/22/24 at 3:14 PM:

I miss my daddy that I haven't met yet. 

I know i need to be patient and I am relatively happy with my life right now. 

but I day dream about when I'm going to meet him several times a day. 

it's crazy to yearn for something that's more of a feeling and which is something that is hard to describe. 

I dream of the day that I really know what it means to be his baby, that he will be there for me whenever I need him and someone who will naturally protect me at all costs. 

I can't wait to feel safe in a pair of big strong arms and for someone to see me for exactly how I am.

i really hope my time will come and that i won't be single for the remainder of my life, but i would be unfulfilled now in any kind of vanilla relationship, now I know what else is out there. 

I'm waiting daddy. 


2/22/24 at 2:05 PM:

It's my birthday and I am chronically spank deprived.


2/22/24 at 11:36 AM:

i don't have fantasies. i have goals. pt.2 

But some of them still pushed.

"But don't you want to be a slave someday?"

"What makes you orgasm?"

"Shaved or Natural?"

"Why aren't you owned?"

"How many Doms have you served?"

"When did you know you were a sub?"

"How much can you take?"

"Are you bisexual?"

Ummmm yeah, so first of all, NONE of that is your business, and second of all, there are many more ways to explore BDSM rather than the newbie sub to being owned by random internet dom pipeline. It'd be laughable if it wasn't so damn potentially damaging.


So yeah. What's my fantasy? Currently:

--to be in a better position financially to go to more Play Parties & Social Events...

--to see my Munch grow and prosper and become a long running, trusted thing for the community...

--to find a more private venue for different types of Social and Educational Events....

--to find my new favorite Dungeon/Play Space/Play Party Group...

--to continue to give back to the Community in different ways that i can...

--to foster relationships with cool Kinksters whose company i enjoy...

--and maybe, someday, to fall in love with someone who loves me the same way in return (not holding my breath on that one!).

You know. Boring shit that doesn't have to do with your dick. LOL!


2/22/24 at 11:36 AM:

Do you, as a slave, want to be destroyed, so you can be rebuilt


2/22/24 at 11:33 AM:

i don't have fantasies. i have goals. pt 1


It gets a little frustrating sometimes when i am hit with that question, "What's your biggest fantasy..." Or worse yet, when someone just barges in to my inbox, telling me in detail their fantasy.

Truth is, i really do not focus on "fantasies". Sure, i have them and (ahem) use them in appropriate settings. But i rather focus on reasonable, achievable goals, done with people that i trust, respect and can be myself around.


Oh how the tide of my inbox turned, once i got involved in the community and was no longer a wide-eyed newbie who believed that everyone with the title of "Dom" or "Master" had gone to "Dom" or "Master" school.

my answer to the question of "What's your biggest fantasy? What are your goals?" became things like:

--to explore more of the Dungeons in and around LA
--to go to more Classes and learn all i can about safety and techniques
--to get Flogged and Tied by highly skilled people that i trust
--to give back to the Community in whatever ways that i can

Boy oh boy did that quickly dry up the lightning-round, 20 questions style "interviews" from all the anonymous Internet Insta Doms!



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