Collarspace.com

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sousse

sousse - photo 1

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Friends:
RWG215

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This sub belongs to Lordofhouse she is protected by him. All Doms respect that she is not to talk with them unless he has given them permission. Subs may contact but do not ask her to join them she is owned.


I am not really sure what I'm doing here to be perfectly honest. I was a submissive with much experience for many years. I loved everything about the lifestyle and who I was in it. It started when I was fairly young. then one day after a soul crushing heartbreak I went "vanilla". Yes I know I've cut the story off abruptly, I apologize for that but it's also not why I'm here. So yes I don't know why I'm here but I can identify why I'm not. A lot has happened since then.
I did a lot of things I'm not proud of. I dropped out of college, I let myself go and the list goes on. I'm also married now, to someone who though he seems dominant by nature (probably what made me attracted to him even while trying to stick to vanilla). The plain truth though is that he's not dominant, or at least he's not exploring that side of himself I suppose and as a matter of fact has never even heard of anything remotely close to "BDSM" (which is also probably why I thought he was a safe choice). But that's also not why I'm here, I remember a lot of information , experiences and so on that I had when I was previously in the lifestyle but I know I'm not back necessarily looking for someone.
I think I'm just trying to get in touch and like I've said before, I may not know what that is but I definitely know what I don't want. I'm not looking for a relationship, for play, for anything like that, and please no presumptuous messages. I'm not into being humiliated, or doing stuff online. In fact I'm probably though I hate to use this as an example, closest to christian grey/anastasia steele complex. That is, ideally.
I'm so lost that even if I had a GPS built into me I likely still would not be able to find my way. So there it is for now, I feel like there is something more that needs to be said but I can't seem to figure out just what that is right now even though it's practically piercing a hole through me with it's constant nagging. 06.24.13 - I'm still lost in the fog but I'm thinking what brought me here and what I'm finding cathartic about it is a feeling or sense of "home" if that makes any sense. I'm still not looking for anything or anyone. That's part of what I'm still trying to figure out and as I being to piece it together I'm realizing that there's a comfort in the familiarity, because of how natural it feels. Well I guess we'll see what happens...

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kimberlyW
 
 Age: 29
 Kuwait