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| Another attempt at this:
Right, well - I recently saw the young lady who got me into all this some years ago. There was still a crackle of energy between us, but sadly no opportunity for anything long-term to come of it. What we did have was an amazing week which answered a lot of questions for both of us. Perhaps the main thing to come of it was the realisation that our cravings were childish and undeveloped - perhaps because we were so much younger (neither of us yet 20) when we explored each other so fully.
She thought she wanted something rough and at times spiteful, and I thought I wanted to give her that. And that was how our week began - all clamps, crops and indescriminate use. As the week went on the clamps and the crops etc still made appearances, but they seemed less important. We rediscovered our connection. She was once again the naughty, experimental sub who pushed me at least as hard as I pushed her. She was playful and occasionally contrary, and I was the Dom that all this time I'd forgotten how to be - I was her safe place and the rock she could dash herself against, all in one.
Now I remember just how good that is, and it has been a much-needed kick up the arse. I bitched and whined about 'what I wanted' without realising the past 15 years had dimmed the real prize, leaving me with an empty desire for acts that without that connection were empty themselves.
Having caught sight of that I am moved to re-evaluate what it is I want. I want the connection. Within that connection all things are possible.
Of course, this tells you precious little about me other than that I have been missing out on this particular joy for a long time. I'd like to get back to it, either with a regular play-partner or as part of a long-term relationship. I'm incredibly loving and protective, seek to nuture, guide and correct, and most of all to find a sub who wants a safe place that is also a rock to dash herself against.
Feel free to ask about specifics.
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