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What complexities constitute a single person... allow me to try to parse out this one. I'm a scholar, a musician, a do-gooder, and a gamer. Yet we are more than what we do. I'm a kind person, and I'm a little shy. I only recently worked up the nerve to post a pic. I try to make people comfortable, or, failing that, at least make them laugh. I expect a lot from myself, and I work very hard to achieve what I do. I could say that I have an open mind, but this sounds a bit too passive. I seek out unfamiliar ideas, things, histories, and experiences to widen the scope of my thinking - I have to in my chosen field. I love to share such things with others and to see their world get a little bigger as well. I feel lucky to call a very diverse group of people my friends.
I want to experience as much as I can in this life. This excludes the chemical things that so many others are referring to, which I feel limit and restrain more than they offer - I'm D/D free, and I do not drink or smoke.
Onto matters of the flesh ;)
Society does a funny thing to us all, providing acceptable ways of being and acting, and at the same time limiting others. I sometimes find myself at odds with these limitations, as would anyone else reading a profile on this website in earnest. I'm a very kinky switch, in absolutely equal halves. You can add that to who I am above: scholar, musician, very kinky switch. It's an important and increasingly unfulfilled part of me, and there's no confusion there. You must understand that I want to be utterly dominated as much as I want to return the favor. 24/7 doesn't make sense in the 'traditional' (snicker) mode for me. Consider instead the open possibilities at all times, not predicated on who we are beforehand, but how we are feeling here and now. That's right, I hope to switch with the same person - it can be exciting and fulfilling, though it takes some work and plenty of communication.
When I'm on top, I'm not aggressive or mean, and I'm very careful to only inflict pain when I know it's desired, and in just the right amount. I'm playful and utterly unfair to you as my plaything. On top, I get my way, but I'm very responsive to what you desire. Since my goal is to make you feel dominated, why not cater to your professed soft-spots? I'm demanding but patient. Bondage is something that deserves to be done right, and 'right' is predicated on both our tastes, moods, and our personal interaction.
When I'm on bottom, I'm yearning for you to show me just how I'm beneath you, and for you to exercise that power in your own way. Keeps me on my toes (or off!). I give you everything I expect from those I would top for.
I won't give a long list of things I like, but I will clarify a thing or two. I crossdress, and I'm a hottie :). Seriously though, this is all about sexuality - I like being male - this isn't something that is dying to burst out of me, but at the same time I like to subvert gendered expectations subtly, even if it's only to myself. I dress up to feel sexy. Do I need to mention that your dressing up may well floor me? I will never show that side of myself publicly, even though I can and have lectured on gender performance. Aside from tactile pleasures, clothing wields symbolic power, which I love to put to use in roleplaying, emphasizing the roles each chooses to play.
My main limit is those who would take from others and not give of themselves. From the accompanying list, I also wanted to emphasize that I'm very uncomfortable with exhibitionism for a number of reasons, as well as CBT and anything involving the word 'sounds'.
So, whoever you are who has read this far, I'd love to hear from you, whether you would just like to talk or whether you just know that I'm going to like you.
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It's funny how kinks can creep up on you when you're open to them. My current second picture is pretty good evidence of that. I had a blast. |
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Heh, I should probably update this to indicate that I'm back in Michigan, where I've been for some time. Feel free to email, all you kinky people. I need to balance out the vanilla/kinky friend (and other acquaintance) ratio. It's too much like vanilla extract lately. |
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If I cut off your arms/
And I cut off your legs/
Would you still love me anyway?/
If you're bound and you're gagged/
Draped and displayed/
Would you close the door on my fantasy?/
Helena, by the Misfits. Look up above if you don't believe me!
This post does not endorse involuntary dismemberment. It only posits an enjoyment of silly songs that talk about kinky things.
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Hmm...I don't know whether it's my work, or my band, but I've got a serious dominant streak going. I've got it bad...or good...depending on one's perspective.
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I've been thinking and writing a lot about experience and subjectivity, particularly in the sense that the latter and the former are in a dialectical relationship (as well as much more complex interactions).
What does this mean, aside from the fact that you're one of those people who keeps reading despite (perhaps unnecessarily) complicated language?
I want a lot of experiences, of course! Want a practice partner or to try something out? It doesn't hurt to ask. I could your man, master, boi, pony or femme, for a limited time only! Other conditions are negotiable of course.
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I have been accumulating toys lately at an alarming rate. Most are for
my amusement, naturally, since I'm not seeing anyone, but some of it
might be fun for later...like the fitted satin maid's dress and all
that goes along with it (and please, see above, I'm not of that
knowable type -I'm not too vain to clean on my hands and knees, and I
look better in a dress ;) ). I'm also the proud new owner of a floor
cage. It's made for (big!) dogs, but I put a nice fluffy down mat in
there for comfort. It looks downright enticing. Now, if only I had
someone who 'gets it' to lock in there. Or put me in there. I'm open. :)
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I read the message boards sometimes to get a cross-section of people who enjoy bdsm. Some folks are great and as open-minded as I'd have thought, others have odd ideas about knowable types that they seem to enjoy grouping people into. I'll try to make this rant short and simple, because I'm a social scientist. Here's the deal: we all do it, but the trick is to catch yourself. There are essentially two kinds of reasoning people do about the world around them: one in which you go off of your own experiences, the other in which you are actively trying to learn about it by collecting broader experiences. There's nothing wrong with your experiences, but at the same time, there's nothing so right about them that they necessarily reflect broader reality. That's why, when people take social science courses, read books about them, etc, it can profoundly open up their minds. The former style of reasoning yields naive bigotry and worse. The latter breeds understanding, tolerance, and when you think about it, social power. I'm a professional practitioner of the latter. I don't expect you to be, but I do expect that you're one of those rare people who isn't too stubborn to constantly learn things.
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Though I'm primarily after a relationship, play is also a possibility. Now that I've got a whole house to myself, elaborate, loud, and long-lasting play is a distinct possibility as well. So bring your fantasy!
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I got caught in quite a downpour, and decided to take a couple of pics. No, I don't walk around with my hair that crazy, but if it happens, it happens :-)
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| Age: 23 |
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Missouri |
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