1/17/2017 5:18:08 PM: Anyway, like I mentioned, I was looking for something. We are ALL looking for something out there in the world. The important thing to realize is that, well, you have to know what it is you are looking for. Vocalizing it works wonders. HOWEVER, if you are not sure of what it is that you are looking for, TALK about it with your SO, Dom(me) or even a fellow submissive. What one person might not be able to put into words someone else, who plays with words or with a little more experience, MIGHT be able to help you figure it out.   Let me just take myself for example. It took a post in a journal of another person to make me actually get up off my backside and take an important step. First I had been away from the scene for a REALLY long time. Oh, I got tied up a couple of times (those pics with Eve being my tormentor were 2 years ago and THAT was after almost 15 years away) and even spanked a couple of times but, well, it was all, as they say, PLAY and it did address a small part of my needs. But when I saw this little post of a Domme who was not all that far away, I figured, since there was a small phrase called 'bucket list' and that got me to thinking... So I wrote to Mistress and after talking through here and text message, we met for lunch and our first 'play' time. Okay, let me tell you that this time, I was not nervous or concerned (which since it had been some time I was actually kind of giddy, really) and felt that delicious sting of a hand slap, followed by a couple of other implements, which was VERY nice and then a CANE! YUP! Masochistic little old me was starting to come out! And Christy was REALLY getting into sub space with that. But remember when I said that communication is IMPORTANT!!! Well, let me say that I learned just how much of a slut Christy really CAN be and I will leave it at that!   Now, lets fast forward a whopping week. Next important thing to remember is COMMUNICATE! Did I say that??? Well, there arae a great many different KINDS of or types of submissives, just like Dom(me)'s out there. Some just want 'play' and then, well, there are others... I seem to be one of those others... I didn't really realize that I was different but suddenly I am just playing maid (in a proper uniform I will have you know!) and I was ENJOYING myself. I was doing laundry and other things, learning how it was supposed to be done and I was HAPPY!!! I felt MORE complete and like Christy!   So, there is something else that one has to learn and that is to experiment. I have NEVER really had CBT done to me and I am sure that after this last time, it will not be the last, as Mistress enjoyed it, as did Christy! Oh, and NIPPLES!!! Mistress discovered my nipples and, well.... Let me tell you that they were deliciously tortured on Friday. Driving home not so bad. Saturday morning, TENDER... Sunday, same thing... Now, today is Wednesday and I believe that they have finally settled down... So, of course, I NEED another fix! And since I travel and will be traveling with other people, guess how hard that fix is going to be to get??? LOLLuckily, Mistress has some time for her little gurl, this time I get to be a maid again and I am so REALLY looking forward to feeling... Like my inner self. It is really something special when you come across someone who not only wants to get to know you but also help you along on the journey in ways that you never thought imaginable. So thank you, Mistress, for helping me along on this journey through life and for the unexpected detours that I am ever so grateful for!

1/7/2017 6:46:58 PM: When you consider the amount of people that are out here, on this site and others, and the possibilities of making contact with someone, part of you things that it won't happen and another part of you sits there and maybe even HOPES that nothing will happen.So now, after the time on CollarMe, Alt, Fetlife and here, I guess I can say that, umm, contact is indeed possible! So I will say that I had a wonderful experience meeting a Mistress in real life and spent 2 hours just talking! Now, some people might think that talking and getting to know another person is not what is important but let me tell you something. I find it to be the MOST important thing when you are even considering giving over control of yourself to another person, even for an hour or two.In that time I discovered things about her and got comfortable spending time with her. Then we went to her dungeon space and talked a little more. What I also found interesting to ME is that I had no difficulties actually taking off my guy clothes and changing into my Christy undies and maid uniform.Even while I was dressing and even after I was dressed, we continued to talk and get to know what boundries there were and what it might be that mutually enjoyable. Little did I realize when I first met her and then during the time I gave myself over to her that I would not only rediscover my masochistic streak but also, as stupid as it might sound, the sissy inside me... So while I know that Mistress will not marry me and Lord knows I am NOT ready to take THAT on, I have a rather wonderful feeling that at least for now, Christy has started on the path that she was looking for.... Thank You Mistress....