Collarspace

This feels like an impossible thing to me anymore. My skepticism in the lifestyle is grown so great that logging on here is a task. Just being honest.

I have play partners. I wont give them up...at least not at first. Does it mean Im poly? Maybe, I dont know. I know at one time I lived and breathed this. Now its very difficult to be inspired by it.

I want a love that consumes me. Its who I am. I dont have trust issues but im not perfect. I was hurt. Im over that. I just try to grow and be better as a human. I forgive, sometimes too easily and sometimes not easily enough. Im fiercely loyal and Im complicated. Im not sure I could ever live without kink. Inspiring that is a whole other thing. I love adventure, but I love the quiet times. My life is built around the quiet times.

When you are alone, do you think about him?
Waiting by the phone to see if hes called you now
Has he called you now?
Ive been by your side for 10 years and counting
Dealing with your lies, inside I am dying now
Im dying now

Am I superficial? Maybe, I dont know. I do think there are more important things than looks, but attraction is not really within my control. If Im not, Im not. Its not a personal affront to you. Please have yourself somewhat figured out if you are going to write me. I spent a long time figuring myself out and I need someone that is at the same place in life. No players, fakes or wannabes please. Lifestyle wise i live at an intense level.