I've had a wide range of experiences in this realm and have come to learn a lot about myself, particularly over the last couple of years. First and foremost: I have a strong urge to be hurt, badly (under safe, consensual circumstances with somebody I can trust, of course). However, I'd say I have an interesting relationship with pain. I don't enjoy it physically at all and will usually do whatever I can to make it stop. With that being said, I am incredibly grateful when I am forced to suffer without mercy because the experience is one of a kind. Pain takes me to the darkest corners of own reality. It pushes me and it teaches me about myself. It gives me strength. Pain also allows me connect with my tormentor in a way that is truly remarkable. It's very rewarding for me (and actually turns me on) to see my suffering bring pleasure to others ... I think sadism is sexy :) Some of my other favorite things: Psychological torment. Fear. Humiliation and degradation. Exhibitionism. Being playful. And, when the mood strikes, I can sometimes get the urge to take charge and inflict pain. Note: This only ever happens with fellow females!