In the first minute I was starting to make my profile, I got about ten messages before my profile even had any information in it at all. I am quickly learning that I will not respond to everyone that I hear from and that many just send a message to anyone.

I really came here because of one thing about me that is a need that I have, although I am also interested by some other things here or at least curious. I am not really looking for anything here now at least not in terms of meeting people or some relationships. I am just exploring and thinking about where I may eventually go with my own needs which are not very normal. What I know is different about me is that I have huge need, it is not a like but for sure a need, for semen or cum or jizzle or whatever someone wants to call it.

I am nineteen and in my first year of college. I first did anything sexual when I was fourteen, which is maybe a bad thing to say. At first was with a guy I was kind of dating and agreed to give him blowjobs. From the first time I discovered that I loved getting cum and loved loved having it in my mouth or on my skin and touching it and the smell and feel and taste and everything about it. It just felt magical and is like, well impossible to explain. I now feel like the whole reason I was made and that my body exists is because there is this magic liquid that males can make that I exist to be the place it is supposed to go.

Later on, I first had regular sex and had a guy, a different guy, cum inside of me and that was just like when some kind of switch turned on in me. I feel so different when I have it in me or on me, but especially in me that I cannot describe. When there is some in me I am happy and if there is not like for a few days then I get more antsy and can’t concentrate and just feel really anxious. It will sound stupid to some people but it is really like an addiction and if I go for long without any then I can’t focus and can’t sleep and start getting jittery. But then when I get some I feel sooo good, just like I can’t describe. Usually when I feel a guy is cumming in me it just makes me start to shudder and I have contractions in my pussy, not quite like orgasm normally but almost like that.

So basically for several years I have just known that I needed to get cummed in or at least swallow some or have some on me where I can feel it at least every few days (but usually almost everyday) or I just start to become a mess and get sad and cranky and nervous and can’t do anything right or be around anyone. I know this is the opposite of how some girls reaction to semen and I don’t know why I am this way . I used to think maybe it would get to be less of a need but actually it is more over time. So I have had to kind of make different relationships that met my needs that I won’t really go into but to say it was just guys I know and not a boyfriend. I have had several boyfriends but not for very long each time.