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| Firstly I would like to say that I also have previously gone under a different name on Collarme but have decided to voice this on a new profile as I want to be able to speak freely without possibly hurting friends feelings.
I am not trying to offend anyone just speak my opinion honestly. So I have just turned 35 am in good physical shape, I consider myself to be very bright, I come from a good background, have no history of abuse, and have lived a diverse and interesting life. I am warm, well read, have diverse interests with a good helping of sexy. Overall, for the purposes of this profile, I figure I am probably about a 7.5 compared to other 35 year old women. There are certainly other 35 year olds that are smarter, more beautiful, more open, sexier, warmer etc, but on balance I did pretty ok.
So I used to get endless emails from 50ish men who I would say were mostly decidedly average. If you have an average looks, lived a normal type life, don't have a searing intellect, an average job, average success in your life then a 50 year old woman would probably consider you a 5 compared to other 50 year old men. There is nothing wrong with that it is cool. But time for a reality check, to a 35 year old woman you are a THREE, that is right a THREE! Surprise, surprise you are having no luck.
So if you are wondering why you are making no progress on here, maybe you should set your targets at an appropriate level. Look I wouldn't expect a 26 year old guy who was a 9 to be interested in a relationship with me because to him I would drop from 7.5 to a 5, to expect success there would be arrogant of me.
I understand that you may be physically and emotionally attracted to younger women, but really what are you offering her, why would she reciprocate. I have been attracted and intertwined with older guys but in both cases they were extremely bright, very fit for their age or even my age, were very successful and have done some very cool things in their lives. Yep, I'd say both of them were nines compared to other men their age. So with the age difference we came out roughly balanced.
I am not saying there is anything wrong with being a five or a three or nine. I just found found, that generally, a lot of the men on here are aiming too high. If you are a 50 year average guy who is set on a younger woman well maybe you need to be aiming at a woman who is a 3 within her age group and then you might have some success. Sorry if that is ouch, but the truth can hurt. Maybe it is not a problem with the women but rather that you are not that appealing to the women that you desire.
From my point of view, as a submissive woman, the only way I can be submissive to a man is if I respect him enough, I can like guys but never want to submit to them. One example is that I need to know that you are at least my equal intellectually or it won't fire for me. I'm never going to submit to a guy who manages a computer repair business, whose main leisure activity is watching footy on the weekend and whose idea of reading is the sport section of the Age. But you know what there are some women out there who would be happy to have this guy, and would adore him because he is a lot nicer to her than the last jerk she dated and they are roughly matched.
So how about a little thought before you fire off those messages and then complain about how women never respond. From a woman's perspective it seems kind of arrogant to fire off email to significantly younger women unless you are very confident that you are a good catch, and if she is an above average younger woman then you better be a bloody fine catch. And this is all before you get to your BDSM interests, because in the end you need a lot more than BDSM to sustain a relationship.
Get out of the fantasy guys and back to the reality. You can't always get what you want!
Oh and by the way, we all generally all overestimate our own overall attractiveness, I was initially toying with 8 or 8.5, but then remembered this and gave myself a reality check. So I suggest you knock a point off yours too, for good measure. :-)
Update: Now guys no reason to get bitchy in your replies, it is very unbecoming. This posting was deliberately blunt and simplified for a reason, so it gets noticed and so more people get the general point. Never, prior to today, have I actually rated myself or other people, but we all make informal assessments and judgements of possible romantic interests when deciding if we want to take it further. Feel free to ignore this post and make any assumptions your ego needs you to make about me, I care not. All the best. :-)
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