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| At this time in life, i am only seeking friendship. i will answer messages accordingly.
So please don't get mad if i block you becasue you continue to pursue a topic i am uncomfortable with after i have told you it is something i do not wish to discuss or am not interested in. i am not in the best emotional state right now, and because it is not an interest of mine when i am in the best of moods, i will not respond to messages that are meant to make a person feel like trash, meat, a doormat or similar derogatory terms. Some humiliating and degrading words that are often used in a relationship like one would find here are a turn on at the right times. i just don't expect those words to start a friendship nor do i expect those words to happen early in a relationship. So, for now, if You feel like using those kind of words in conversation aimed at me, please, pass me by.
i am not currently comfortable sharing pictures of myself and i will probably be a bit picky about sharing any private information for now. So pass me by if you have problems with that.
It is always hard to know what to write here. Not sure who or what i am anymore. i have been in this lifestyle on and off for quite a long time. i have come to realize that eventhough i know i have a natural submissive personality, and at times I have been a very well behaved slave, it seems to have faded. Not completely non existent, but seems to have been taken over by something else. Emotions and behaviors that are not accepted in a submissive and certainly not in a slave have put the submissive parts of me in the background of my personality. i still crave all of it. i still want to be the submissive and slave i once was. i still try to please and be pleasing, to serve with the ability that i have. But bad behaviors, bad moods, emotions taint all of it at times.
i have been betrayed many times throughout my life. Both in lifestyle relationships and the vanilla world. It is difficult for me to make a connection in general. So even trying to make friends is a hard task for me, social anxiety doesn't help, but i am willing to try. Maybe i can learn why i have become the way i am now. Perhaps it will help me not be so devastated and depressed. Maybe friends can help enlighten me as to why my submissive nature has faded into the background. i don't know if it will be easy to find friends here and i don't know if i can be the conversationalist i need to be to make friends. So, i will answer messages as i can, be patient if you message me. |
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