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I just created my Collarspace a few days ago and the response has been...overwhelming. I'm flattered by the interest, and I genuinely would like to take the time to respond, but the sheer quantity of messages has made that practically impossible.
I thought it would be helpful to give a bit more information on what I'm looking for -- if you're still interested, and if we are truly a good match, I hope to hear from you (again).
I'm looking for something very specific: A mentor to train me to be a submissive wife to my husband.
I'm newly married, and happily married, and I will not cheat on my husband.
What I'm hoping to find is someone who will train me to be a submissive and obedient Christian wife who is devoted to servicing her husband/Master in all ways.
Let me be clear: I am NOT looking to simply learn how to be a better submissive in the sexual sense. In fact, that's the one area where I am truly submissive, and deliciously so. Hubby is happy happy happy in that regard.
But my husband is from -- and still lives in -- a Latin American country with strict traditional gender roles, where women truly serve their husbands and cater to them. It is my husband's upbringing, it is his idea of what being a wife is, and the truth is, I want to be like that, too, not just to make him happy, but because I feel immensely attracted -- emotionally and sexually -- to the idea of being a submissive, devoted wife.
But the truth is, other than in the bedroom, I am hardly submissive. I am very often complaining or criticizing, finding fault in the most trivial or innocuous things. I am also fiercely independent, and although I generally abide by my husband's "rules," such as not drinking when I'm not with him, or coming home by a certain time, I have also broken those rules a number of times. And as much as I say I want my husband to lead me, we both know that he could never keep me from doing what I really want to do -- I'm too independent and stubborn for that.
My husband is a great man, a better husband than I am wife, to be honest. He is the love of my life, and I want to be the best wife possible for him and for me, and the best mother possible to our future children.
This isn't about sex. This is about dedication and devotion in all ways, being a traditional wife in a male-led marriage, very similar to a 1950's male as HOH marriage.
"Kink" is not part of my husband's world. The concept literally doesn't exist in his country. And although I have been to dungeons in the past, it is absolutely not my thing. I am intensely turned on by Dominance and submission, but there are many more ways of expressing that than with whips and chains and leather. The kind of Dom I've always been attracted to is far more likely to be in a fatherly Cosby sweater than leather chaps. And make no mistake -- my husband is dominant, inside of the bedroom and outside of it, but his dominance comes from his strength and masculinity and traditional values. I love that about him and wouldn't trade it for anything.
I should also mention: my husband and I are in the process of obtaining his visa to come permanently to the U.S., and until he actually receives a visa, all of our time together is spent in his country, where there are no S&M dungeons, no sex shops, and no kink community whatsoever.
So if you're writing me about nipple clamps or floggers or sex toys, we are not a match.
If you're demanding that I send you nude pics or perform sex acts for your viewing pleasure, we are not a match.
And if you're asking if we can have physical "training" sessions in person, we are not a match. Period.
Also, I need to add this: if you're younger than me, I'm afraid we are not a match -- I do need my mentor to be older than me, preferably considerably so.
I am looking to find a mentor to correspond with by e-mail, video calls or phone calls only. If we ever do meet in person, it won't be sexual in the sense of sexual contact between mentor and mentee.
I am truly open and willing to follow my mentor's orders and commands and following through with any rewards or punishments he deems fits, but he must accept that I will not be able to have sexual contact with him at any time.
I know that this arrangement will be an absolute turn on for me, even though it doesn't involve sexual contact, and ideally, it would be very stimulating for my mentor as well. I am open to how the training will be conducted and how we will correspond. If you are interested in exploring this with me, I would love to receive a serious, personal e-mail from you.
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