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| Standing at the top of the high board. You know you need this, you know you want this, you know it is your destiny. You stare around you at everybody else silent and still, transfixed in the moment that will change everything. You look down on those living out their everyday lives by the pool, feeling their lack of purpose, knowing you were one of them so recently. Now you stand on the high board, knowing one step and your life will change, one step and you'll have taken your very own little blue pill and your life suddently transforms. Just one step.....
Well here I am on the high board, looking for that deep water to dive into, looking for the one that can lead me across that last step, here I am hoping and knowing where my destiny lies.
I'm bright, articulate, educated, and hey you might say a sort of stereotypical succesful masculine guy. Some experiences but never enough to make me feel fulfilled, and nothing as close to the slavery I seek now. I'm not your trained slave but I am your blank canvas, and I seek the one who will make this real. I know what I want and know what I need, and I can and will make this journey real.
My life allows relocation without issue so the key for me is the right position above all else.
Will hope you might be interested having looked at this and if so then please let me know, and who knows maybe you will be the one that leads me across that step.
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Why do i desire this? Why do i need this? Questions i have asked myself a thousand times, questions others ask when they know what you are and what you seek.
So many whys so many questions. Sometimes i like to look the in the face and believe i can answer clearly and boldly, sometimes i have tried to hide away from them, pretend to be just another guy on the street living another normal everyday life. But the questions are always there and i guess alwats will be.
So why? Well i am what i am. Do you ask a gay many why he is gay? Do you ask a dog why he is a dog? No you accept we are all different, and accept we all have our own places in the world.
Now as for me it's simple enough. i have flet this need, this hunger since my youngest days, so many little incidents, so many emerging thoughts and imaginations, all signs pointing in one direction. No one big eureka moment, no moment that defined and changed me, no one person that made this become real, just constant thoughts, constant desires, constant small encounters and moments in time. Oh and yes of course i even tried to live that normal life, tried to put this away deep inside me, but yes of course all the time it was denied it just grew and grew.
So here i stand, or should that be kneel, and enough is enough, i'm done with questioning myself at least, i know what i am and i know my destiny. It just needs the right next step with that right person. |
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Face to the floor, naked and and on all fours, i humble myself before her. My position reflects my status, my mindset, my being, i am her property. This is no game, no kink scene between two lovers bored of everyday existence, this is reality this is my life, i am her slave.
My heart beats faster at her approach, the sound of her feet across the floor almost keeping rhythm with my heart. She stands above me, all powerful, majestic to me, my Mistress, my Owner. To me she is everything, she has her hand around my heart and mind, a grip that can and does manipluate and control my very being.
She is my alhpa and my omega, she is the one that I can and will never resist. I am in her thrall, I exist in her shadow, and yet through her my destiny has been fulfilled, through her my life has been made what it is meant to be.
She is my Goddess and i am her slave. |
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