|
|
|
|
I am very intelligent and educated, yet a complete and total slut and
male fucktoy. Yes, I am a dichotomous person with two very different
sides. I'm happy in my normal life; I have a good job, family, and all
that. But still, I have cravings... these animalistic needs and desires
that I need to feed. And need others to help. That's why I'm posting
this.
It has taken me a while to figure out what I want. But, through
trial and error and some good and bad experiences, I think I've finally
got it. I love serving others and being used for their sexual pleasure. I
can be sweet and compassionate, and at the same time be a complete
sexual pig who will go to extremes for someone who can push me there.
You see, I feel at home and at peace with myself when obeying orders,
when being commanded to be a dirty slut, doing things that most who know
me could never envision. The pleasure I personally get when in that
submissive zone where I will do slutty, vile, disgusting acts for
another is hard to put in words. It's a positive feedback loop: you
objectifying me and turning me into a piece of meat that you'll use for
your dirty pleasures and fantasies makes me happy and satisfied; in
turn, I'm willing to open up to you and give you even more, allowing you
to push me more and get even more from me. I an extremist and love
being taken to very low and deep places. Congruent with that, I have
very few limits (we can discuss what those few limits are). I simply
enjoy being used. Submitting to you and becoming a fucktoy for you is
what I want and need.
For the record, I am NOT looking for a cyber relationship. I want
and need real time. I want to meet real people. And while I want to
connect with real people, I'm not looking to be best friends with anyone
either. Actually, I don't even care to be your friend. Just use me...
it'll be easy to determine how well we click and if you get me and
understand what I need. In a way, this is still a friendship, just in a
different context than what most would consider. For this type of play,
there obviously needs to be some level of trust/intimacy between the
parties. Each person defines and derives this trust differently. For me,
the intimacy is achieved DURING play (not talking for hours and hours
and hours beforehand of your family, my family, our jobs, etc) - it's
achieved by a mutual awareness, a non-judgmental understanding of what I
need, what I want, what I crave... that I am not a bad person, I simply
want to be used as a fucktoy. The more someone talks to me while we are
playing and can convey this understanding through both words and
actions, the easier it is for my mind and body to let go and enjoy
myself. If you can appreciate me for it, if you can see me as holes that
need to be filed and as a slut that needs to be used, you let me know
you understand me. And this is what leads to intimacy for me in this
situation.
About me... I'm articulate and educated and know what I seek. I'm
not ashamed of my desires. I seek out these pleasures for no other
reason than the simple fact I enjoy them immensely. I love being told
what to do. I feel that underneath my skin, there is a part of me that
is a filthy, skanky whore. And that side needs to be able to get out and
play on occasion too. If I could train myself to be a nasty whore on my
own, I'd do it. But for this, I need help... your help. Who do I seek?
Someone discreet, who can respect my normal side, and completely
disrespect and use my naughty side. I am bisexual, and while I enjoy
pleasing men as well as women, I definitely prefer women. I'm more
likely to allow myself to be used by a man at the request of a woman or
with one present. Men are still welcome to write though, and if
something catches my eye, you never know what might happen. More than
anything, I'm looking for people who get me and can give me what I
crave.
|
|
|
|
