|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
(Kind of) Looking for sub/slave needing long term, committed situation. Serious Dom ... blah blah blah ... You get the idea. For me this is all about your surrender and my ownership of you.
Toys and theater are fun, but real ownership goes much deeper. If the chemistry is right, you will end up completely and totally mine. You will find yourself needing to willingly give yourself over to me completely.
My methods are unusual, subtle & refined, so if you're expecting an over the top sadist, you will be confused & probably disappointed. Tell me what you think you want, and what experiences you have had.
Ultimately this will need to be about real life; I'm not interesting wasting my time jerking pixels. I'm sane so I understand the need to build trust, but I also know trading messages is a horrible form of communicating the complexities real human interaction. People are interesting; pixels grow boring quickly.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
If your're wondering about my specialties, I'd have to say that a proper mix of orgasm control and orgasm denial is definitely one of them.
I've trained subs to orgasm using only verbal commands and/or pain as a trigger and at also trained those same subs to be completely unable to orgasm without permission, no mater how hard or how long their bodies were worked. Hours of brain melting sex (yes, I do have the stamina and skills needed for literally hours, and yes, keeping a sub locked on the edge of an orgasm without them able to find achieve release is definitely brain melting to them), their bodies straining for release, thrashing, squirming, shaking and their brain completely wracked and yet unable to find release without my explicit permission.
It can be a truly life altering experience for a sub; one of the most powerful many will ever experience. It's an experience that can be every bit as transcendent and transforming as the deepest pain or any other form of actual and complete release and surrender. A sub's own body no longer under their control or responding to their own needs and desires, but instead responding only to the commands and desires of the Dominant who has taken control.
Oh, while the links below have a wealth of good information and I agree with much of the content, there are definitely places where I disagree. There is some good information but like everything else in life, one size/style/flavor/etc. never really does fit everyone. |
|
|
If you're reading my profile and/or new to the lifestyle and haven't spent any time reading the following websites, I'd recommend spending a couple hours and really crawling through the articles. Topics covered include safety, dynamics of D/s relationships, reasonable expectations for both Doms and subs, and a fair bit of common sense. Well worth the time invested. While not all of my opinions exactly match those expressed, there's enough common ground to understand where I'm coming from. The articles about predatory Doms and predatory subs are particularly good for newbies.
w w w submissiveguide c o m
sistersinsubmission blogspot c o m |
|
|
I tend to really enjoy the quiet, dreamlike world of the night. It feels so much like an empty canvas just waiting to be painted.
And completely unrelated:
I was emailing back and forth with a sub the other day and she hit upon this assessment based upon knowing essentially nothing about me other than my profile here and journal:
"I think you are looking for someone who wants to obey and is eager to please, and a lot of what you are finding is women who don't like to make their own decisions and who want you to spank them. I am a little bit of both; maybe what you would consider as a pet."
And interestingly she seems to have hit things about dead on, right down to her "pet" assessment. I was quite surprised. |
|
|
Lately I have also been carefully considering the question "Do I want more?". I think it's a worthy question and one that needs careful thought. I suspect that in a lifestyle like ours, it would be very easy to try and swallow that one more little treat, and have your whole life explode like the glutton in that skit from Monty Python's Meaning of Life. Sometimes enough is enough.
So do I want more? I think the answer is yes, but only if I find just the right sub. I have no need to prove myself, carve notches, or prove anything of any kind to anyone. But I am quietly looking for just the right sub to fit into my world and to mold her into what is needed. I think for the right girl it could be quite an opportunity.
So what kind of sub am I seeking? One one who understands the difference between sadism and hard use.
On the path of sadism lies destruction, and the doms who live on that path should not be allowed any toys. They are ultimately just out to destroy them. They always remind me of the kids who put firecrackers in their sister's barbies, and then later in life you hear about them ending up in prison. I suspect in many cases, these are people who are destroying others as sad outlet for their own self hatred.
The other path does involve hard use (and essentially whatever else suits my whim), but also involves a Dom who understands that like any other tool or possession, a sub requires some up-keep. We take our cars in for oil changes and detailing, take our pets to the vet and groomer, have the roof fixed on the house when needed, so why wouldn't we take care of our subs?
If something starts out with some value, then over time, one of two things must ultimately be the outcome. It can be maintained and improved ultimately increasing the value, or it can be neglected or destroyed, ultimately ending up something worthless. If I'm going to invest my time into something, then I expect the return to be worth the time spent. Obvious, right? |
|
|
Concerning the cognitively disconnected:
Some time ago I was considering a new potential sub. It was an interesting situation; she seemed unable (or unwilling) to acknowledge her submissive side when we interacted in person. When face to face, she made requests and set limits, while in our phone and online conversations she said other little things that implied she wanted me to run her over and essentially take her by force.
That is not a game I will ever play with someone with whom I do not have a a strong, respectful and trusting relationship. Ever.
I suspect she was so wrapped up in her drama, that she had no understanding of reality of the situation. Loosely implied consent (but no supporting signals when face to face) and still wanting to be taken isn't a reasonable expectation for a submissive. It may have been once upon a time, but today we live in a world where a simple misunderstanding, especially one of this type, can have life destroying consequences. The signals need to be clear; clear enough that there's no question of intent or expectation. I know it breaks the fantasy, but before some of those fantasies can be fully explored, there need to exist proper bonds of trust and respect.
On top of all that, she failed some fairly simple expectations. The first time I vised her, she offered something to drink. The second time, she didn't. I asked where her glasses were (a simple yet subtle test - would she pick up on it?); she failed and I went to the kitchen to and selected one .. then another .. then a third .. after about the fourth or fifth glass I found one that was actually clean, or at least visibly clean. While her world looked well organized, her attention to detail was clearly lacking.
Perhaps my expectations are too high or my observations too subtle. I don't think so; to me all of those details connect. Her failed attention to detail in the kitchen shows the same signs of carelessness that her expectations of a potential Dom exhibit. A focus on trying to check off her list of expectations and yet a careless disregard for the fine details and complexities of life. Something she said she wanted her potential Dom to help correct. But apparently lacking the clear thinking to understand the need for obvious consent.
Some "Doms" wouldn't care at all, as long as they could have her. She's HWP and shows at least average beauty; something she presents as a powerful weapon in her favor when comparing herself to the other female members of this community. But I suspect such a Dom could end up being played a fool.
I'm not impossible, but I do expect a sub to share my expectations and attention to detail. As an extension of my will, it must become part of them. |
|
|
Hmm, I've been in a bit of a mood lately.
There are a couple of scenarios that I find myself wanting to play out with just the right sub. One involves a local art museum; the other a very dark and deserted outdoor space.
One I've played out and before and enjoyed; the other would be new, but quite a bit of fun.
I guess I'm just in the mood to sink my teeth into someone... |
|
|
So why is it that people stop responding to an ongoing message exchange the moment things cross the line from generic internet chatter into actual personal space?
I suspect it is because, whatever their profile may say, people like the idea of being safe and anonymous, able to be anyone they want to without needing to risk any part of their real self. It allows them to escape needing to reconcile what is going on inside their head with the actual reality that drives them into participating, even anonymously, in this lifestyle. Essentially it allows them to lie to themselves and others both about who they are and what they want (or need).
Interestingly they do still find themselves drawn to sites like this to meet some kind of need. I suspect it is usually just fear of what they may learn about themselves that keeps them from getting past themselves and growing into who they have the potential to become and find what they need. All of this would be much easier if people could just learn to be honest first with themselves, and then with others.
I do understand that for some people this is just part of the game. As a Dom, I see this behavior from "online subs" it as a complete wast of my time. I can't help but see lying to someone whom you are looking to be Dom'd by as an incredible sign of disrespect.
The sheer volume of this kind of BS is also why I am very upfront in my expectation that some kind of real and personal interaction is a requirement (if the chemistry works). I communicate quite clearly from the beginning that eventually (and I do mean eventually) this will be an expectation. |
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Age: 21 |
Long beach,
California |
|
|
|
| | |