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BeforHimm

		Back		Interests

BeforHimm - photo 1

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	I have had Doms in my life including my ex husband who turned out to be sadistic. i am not looking for someone to treat me with no respect. i do have feelings and i am not someone to be abused. i will not be someone's doormat. i will please my Dom because i want to, not because i am forced to. i want someone that makes me feel safe i will know when he is meant for me. And my Dom will know the same. Someone on here told me i can't have love and respect. That just because of who i am , that someone can talk to me like a 2 dollar whore. Well believe it or not subs/slaves, have feelings. i had a Dom tell me i will get use to the pain, i am not looking to be abused because i am there sub. But i love the rush that accompanies the moment when my control is taken away. To have my Dom release my body and mind and to allow me to reach heights that the vanilla world can't offer. It is the ultimate experience To feel Him control me with His mind, my thoughts always of Him. Never leaving my thoughts, even when i am not with Him. i am still on a journey to find out who i am and what i truly am. i have been told i am a sub with slave tendencies, this may be true. i don't know. still trying to find this out. As for Doms i need One who is firm, considerate well experienced and in control of himself. I respond well to structure, attention and clarity.

When I begin searching for a dominant I am extremely particular. I don’t trust easily and I don’t care or love easily either. I ruled a number of people out because I knew I couldn’t trust them, or they didn’t have the right motives, experience, temperament or ego. I didn’t want a know-it-all and I didn’t want a complete newbie either and I certainly didn’t want an egotistical guy with real or fake experience. Immediately when people hear the word particular they sometimes think ‘shallow’ but my carefulness was really about finding someone I feel safe, sane and consensual so that I could build trust to allow myself to experience my submission. Finding someone I could allow myself to experience my submission with and through. Someone I trust implicitly, someone I care for deeply and someone I want to hold the title and responsibility of owning me.