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The Harem BitchPeople have been asking rather pointed questions about the dynamics of my lifestyle. Tonight we talk about the bitch. Now it needs to be said that while I'm describing a particular event, this happens all the time in many different ways.
The room is dark and there's a fan going. In the middle of the room is my massive 4 poster bed (beautiful to look at, bad for bondage), and beside that on the floor is a small thin mattress. On that mattress is a girl who's been hogtied with soft silk scarves. This one I've named bambi. She's blindfolded, and the fan generates enough noise that she can't hear what’s going on in the next room. Being the bitch of my harem, she's used to this and waits patiently for whatever I have planned.
On the other side of the bedroom door the scene is quite different. It’s brightly lit, my other slaves are laughing, a movie is playing, and puppy (my jewel) is snuggled up next to my feet on her dog bed. I lean down and whisper instructions into her ear, and she grins ear to ear. "Yes Master!" she says as she pops up, startling her 'sisters'. They look at me for an explanation, which I don't give. I own them, I don't need to explain. Plus they'll have their fun shortly.
Puppy slips into the dark bedroom. Wandering over to bambi, she orders her to roll over. My puppy can be a bit of a sadist when allowed, so she relishes watching this girl struggle to get into the position she was told to. Bambi complies quickly, and before she can get completely settled puppy suddenly drops into a squat onto bambi's face and grabs a fistful of bambi's hair, forcing her face into puppy's pussy. Bambi lets out a noise of surprise, but knowing her place, obediently begins to lick. She's come a long way from when I got her. When I first found bambi, the only pussy she'd ever seen was her own. Now as puppy rides her face, gyrating down, bambi expertly licks and flicks, suckles and tongues. Puppy's moans grow loud enough to be heard from the living room, bambi's hands struggle against the scarves binding them to her ankles involuntarily. Finally, I hear screams mixed with barking, the noises puppy makes when she cums, and all is quiet. I smile at the rest of my little harem, their eyes now fixed on me in a "IS IT MY TURN YET?!" sort of way. Then the moans from the bedroom begin again. Poor little bambi is going to make each of my group cum twice tonight.... After more barking and screaming, a sweaty, beaming, smiling puppy turns up in the doorway. "thank you master!" she says with excitement.
Kitten goes in next, followed by princess, their moans and screams echoing as they take their turns on bambi, each one of them appearing in the doorway with that same satisfied, excited smile.
But we can't forget about the poor bitch, now can we?
Puppy goes back in first now wearing her strapon. These things aren't your normal dildo on a harness, I got the good gspot kind. Bambi, still blindfolded and still in the dark is rolled onto her stomach with her ass high in the air. It needs to be said that puppy LOVES her strapon. She LOVES the power it gives her over the other girl, and the shriek that comes out of bambi that I hear all the way from my comfy chair tells me that puppy is definitely enjoying it tonight. The bitch is a very vocal girl, and my puppy is pounding her with some power. Given permission to let bambi cum once, puppy draws it out, edging her, making her beg, then denying her before starting over again. After about 15 minutes, you hear puppy yelling at the "dumb lesbian slut" to cum. Above puppy's shouting degrading comments, you hear a desperate scream from bambi, followed by silence.
Kitten starts to bounce at my feet with excitement, now wearing her strapon, and puppy appears in the doorway again wearing an evil smile. Ah, that girl. As I draw princess's face into my lap to suck my cock, I send kitten in. Kitten uses a little more finesse than puppy. My kitten is naturally bi and enjoys the sensuality of fucking bambi. You hear a much more skillful approach, rather than the raw power puppy used, and bambi's moans raise and lower accordingly. Eventually, bambi is allowed to cum, and kitten lays with her for just a minute. It isn't time for aftercare yet, but I allow her to comfort the bitch for a moment.
Princess's mouth is replaced on my dick by puppy's, and I send her in. Princess, like puppy, isn't bi. But she loves the power she feels when dominating with a strapon. Her approach is purely mechanical. Hard, but not too hard, and unrelenting. Bambi begs to cum and is repeatedly told no, but princess's thrusts don't change. Wham, wham, wham, wham, over and over and over and over. Desperation creeps into bambi's voice, princess just holds her look of intense concentration. More begging from bambi, more denial from princess. Then finally after an eternity princess calmly says "Okay do it", and bambi lets out another scream as a powerful orgasm washes over her. Princess, very matter of factly, simply stands up and walks off, ripping the strapon out of bambi as she goes.
Bambi just lays there panting and recovering for a few minutes, before she feels my very familiar footsteps. I'm 6'4, 260lbs. Its easy to tell my footsteps apart. I have large hands that wrap around the back of her head and grip a massive handful of hair. She gives a small yelp as she's hauled to her knees but opens her mouth as wide as she can. I remove her blindfold and look down into her blue eyes. I can tell in the very dim light that she's begging me to be gentle.....Its almost like she knows what's coming. I love to hear her choke, shoving my cock into her throat repeatedly, giving her a moment to recover, then fucking her face more. Her eyes are squeezed tight shut, the sounds of her struggling echoing out into the living room where my bitches bask in the noises. My thrusts grow faster, her gasps and chokes become louder before finally i shove my balls all the way up to her chin, her nose buried in the skin above my dick, and release down her throat. When she begins to retch, I let her fall to the ground. She pants and composes herself, laying on that little mattress, and I gently begin removing the scarves. she lays there limply for a moment as I gather her up into my bed, before she throws her arms around me and buries her face in my chest. "you're a good girl, you did well" I croon in her ear, and she buries deeper.
After she's recovered, she spends the rest of the evening out in the living room with her sisters. They've showered her, gotten her freshened up, and she's snuggling with one, then the other, crawling back and forth like a pet with a big family. She has a huge smile on her face, and is loving the attention.
So, what exactly IS a bitch and how do they wind up here? Excellent question. So glad you asked.
Contrary to popular opinion, being the bitch isn't simply the starting point in my harem. Put quite simply, a bitch born to be a slave. When I say that, I mean they really haven't gone anywhere in life. Failure after failure in relationships, dead end jobs. This particular girl couldn't hold a job because "mean customers made her cry". Kitten and princess are both gainfully employed as managers. Puppy manages my schedule and manages my harem (more on that in another article). Bitches are the girls who are always one paycheck away from starvation, and one angry relative away from living on the street. In me they find a place where they don't need to be strong, they simply need to serve.
Sooo they're the house pets. No job necessary, their days are full of domestic chores. Cleaning, doing their sisters laundry, taking tasks and directions.
They are trained for sex and sexual activities to be the center of their lives. While we all love sex, it isn't the center of our lives. I have my businesses, kitten has work and
Based on a previous relationship some time ago:
Saturday Night Sunday Morning
It’s raining outside and I curse it for keeping me awake, a lie to myself as I know I never really sleep when you are out. I reach to turn on the light beside the bed and am reminded of the lock you have on me as it rubs my upper thigh. The clock tells me it’s coming upto 2:30 in the morning.
I roll onto my back wondering if you are asleep in the bed you have chosen for the evening, asleep in the arms of another. Or perhaps not asleep, in which case you will be ……….. occupied.
I try to put those thoughts out of my mind, and fail.
Thoughts of you crowd my mind whenever you are from me, thoughts of the curve of your thigh, the look in your in your eye, the taste of you, the way your waist tapers just above your hips, god that makes you so fuckable.
It’s coming up to three in the morning now and I have convinced myself that you are asleep after your exertions.
Your exertions…….. I can’t stop thinking of what you could be doing with whoever he is, in my mind’s eye I see you on all fours with your back arched receiving him your face wracked with the pure pleasure of it, I have seen that look when you are approaching the peak of your orgasm. It’s an addictive sight and a special reward for the man who gives it to you.
I decide to get up and get myself something, descending to the kitchen in a bath robe. With each step I take on the stairs I feel the weight of your restraining lock on me. It’s been ten days now and I have never felt so ripe, kept swollen and aching for you right down to the root of me.
In the kitchen I can see the dark rain running down the window panes as I make myself a cup of tea, coffee would be such a bad move right now.
I sit on a kitchen stool looking at a picture of you laughing and smiling with friends, the image captured is a night out and you are looking so elegant, so beautiful so enticing.
As I sip my tea I find myself gazing at your smile, you have such beautiful lips. My eyes follow their curve to the corners of your mouth. I feel myself absorbed in your every detail.
I love kissing you, feeling you on my lips, your wet tongue penetrating my mouth. One of those intimacy fixes that I crave so desperately. I can’t keep at bay the thought of how those lips have been occupied this evening.
I finish my tea and wash out the cup placing it on the drainer.
The rain seems to be subsiding, with daylight but a short time away I turn out the light and return to bed.
It’s nearly four in the morning and I find myself curled up around a pillow, every now and then rocking my hips into it, but it just makes me ache more.
As I close my eyes I feel so desperate for you to return to me.
The first few hours of dawn have past before the sun has risen to the point where it shines through the window and wakes me. It’s bright and shiny and fresh, the only signs of the nights rain is the dark wet dampness of the soil.
I look at the clock it’s nearly nine thirty, so I rise with a degree of haste to wash, shave and brush my teeth. Before donning my bathrobe again and descending once more into the kitchen.
As I am buttering my toast I hear you come through the door and my heart skips a beat. It’s that cusp of turmoil with thoughts of how you have spent your evening competing with the joy of your return to me.
I hear your heels clicking towards the kitchen as I turn towards the door, seeing you framed in the doorway, hair loosely brushed, braless under your blouse, a flush of red to your cheeks and a coy smile adorning your lips.
You walk upto me placing a hand behind my neck a fingertip or two running back and forth over that spot that you know makes my knees buckle. You hold my gaze for what feels like an eternity looking into my soul through my eyes. I can’t help but lower my gaze and look at your lips before you kiss me.
Its deep, passionate, consuming and ……….. musky.
Your other hand slips into my bathrobe as your fingers fondle the lock you have placed on me. I can’t help but give out a small gasp. As you break away from me.
“Make me a cuppa darling will you” you say as you turn to walk into the living room. I watch you from behind as you walk back through the doorway once again framed, your perfect silhouette accentuated in heels, hold up stockings and a short skirt.
Minutes later I follow you into the living room with a tray laden with cups and pots and hot toast, you are sat on the sofa with your phone texting someone.
As I place the tray on the coffee table you lower your phone, reach forward and take me by the arm. You are smiling and bring me towards you pulling down my arm indicating that you want me to take my position kneeling before you. My body slips into compliance as I kneel looking up at you.
You start to stroke my face and I feel my head tilting to feel your full caress.
“Mmm nice shave” you say as you grip my chin with your fingers tilting my head up as you lean forward and kiss me once again a slow roving kiss with your tongue exploring my mouth as your hand slips behind my head. Your lips slip away from mine “mmm you taste minty fresh” you say.
I am just gazing up at you lost in your eyes.
You lean forward and whisper into my ear “he dropped me off at the door darling, he found our place very easily” before returning to kiss me with passion and purpose. You disengage and then whisper in my other ear.
“I sucked him off in the car before he left”.
The deep pang that it creates in me is merged with my overwhelming desire for you and I feel lost, not knowing which way to turn.
I got some feed back on my last journal entry and thouht I should try to clear up some points.The topic of "collar of consideration or under consideration collars" is one that has been discussed among Masters and slaves.Our houser believes that the Master who has placed a slave under consideration is either having trouble deciding whether they want the slave to be a part of their house, or they want the pleasure of controlling and using the slave without committing to the responsibility of ownership.Both actions are fundamentally wrong. If the Master is unsure if the slave is worthy of wearing their collar, they should communicate with the slave and discuss any concerns they may have.Collaring a slave is a serious commitment that should not be taken lightly. A Master should reveal to the slave what is expected of them if they wear the Master's collar and what their boundaries and duties will be. The slave has a simple, yet complex duty, to please the desires and will of the Master. In reality, it is the slave who should offer themselves to the Master for enslavement and collaring, not the other way around.The goal of the Master is to help the slave become the best slave it can be and to guide them to that end. My house has never personally offered a collar to a slave, but has learned from more experienced couples in the lifestyle to wait until it is asked for.
MasterG
For those who ask me this is the sort of Domination I enjoy and practice. from www.cyberbazzar.com waay back in the day!
The Equalitarian Dom: Is one who controls by teaching, mentoring, and leading. This Dominant knows that when he finds a comparable submissive that things will happen as a natural progression of the interaction. Usually just a short learning phase is required to receive the correct response from the submissive. Both the Dom and the sub “get it”, there is very little need for so called “training” and they naturally know what the other needs and seeks.
The Dominant does not like the situation of constantly repeating and forcing a particular behavior (submission) to occur. Besides the activities (sexual and others) it is the surrender as a result of the Domination that is the enjoyment. Creativity is an important part of this situation. They tend to intellectualize and be more into the philosophical and psychological mechanisms of this life style. They understand the concepts and resultant interactions and can put it into real life. They do not need many rules like the Democratic type, nor do they like the heavy S&M activities of the Authoritarian, preferring submission to occur as a result of an instilled desire in the submissive to surrender. She “wants” to submit as a result of the Dominant’s knowledge and skill in dominating her.
Sensuousness is the rule. Pain is given and received as a form of sensuous stimulation. Light pain as opposed to severe. Sensuous torture is a popular activity in this area. Both the Dominant and the submissive must naturally be this way. These are the people who will claim to be “born that way”. They fully understand the concept of D/s, it comes to them naturally and easily. They attract a submissive that truly and naturally desires to please and who will observe and sense what it is that the Dominant is communicating;
and be able to translate that into the right thing to do. The “doing or saying without having to be told” type. The submissive begs easily and surrenders sweetly. They understand the concept of respect and surrender and can make it happen after initial learning with little or no additional instructions. They embrace the surrender gratefully and lovingly.
These individuals usually form very intimate relationships. There is not much downside to these relationships, because they not only gr the concepts, but can make it happen as well, and their attraction is based on a strong mutual respect. Their strong relationship is not readily apparent to the unobservant, but they are always subtly in the 24/7 mode. The fact that these things come forth naturally and without the need for orders is a great source of pride, satisfaction, and loving. They are the opposite side of the coin from the Authoritarian. Whose pride, satisfaction, and love come from strictness and forbearance.
Your possible future...
You feel so irremissibly subjugated awaiting further use. You succumb to be possessed, my sweet slut, my owned and private slut, you are my pleasing toy. You are just lying there quietly on all fours as ordered; bare and shameful exposed under the excruciating tease of my eyes behind you. Your whole being at my disposal. I will play with you, you know I will, but you don’t know what my play will be, you can only fear and excite on anticipation. I just slide my hand over your ass, and you immediately shiver slightly. Oh, you are behaving so well, no spank yet. I rub a couple of fingers deep between your labia and I enjoy feeling you quiver. Then I force your head back, pulling your hair with my other hand as I put those fingers in front of your mouth. You know what to do, that is it, stick your tongue, lick and clean solicitous your own juices; well done. Meanwhile my cock is already inside your enraptured ass. It is stiff and motionless for the moment, just pulsating in there, but you anticipate that it will start moving, thrusting your senses out without compassion until your outer-self dissolves, your consciousness became nothing, and eventually you turn into a sweaty distressed body utterly possessed between my hands; oh my devoted slut how do you dread and intensely desire that.
But getting there is a long process, although delightful too. You trust me your being, you give up your everyday facade upon me, and that is not easy. We talked a lot. I wanted to know about your ideas, your beliefs, your fears. About how you masturbate, about what the fuck makes you wake up from social somnolence. Talking with more than words. Don’t you understand? I don’t just fuck your body; I fuck your mind into the deepest waters. There is nothing I can do if you are not released to sweetly cry embracing in my lap. Then I may allow you to give me pleasure. Then I may control everything you can do, or wear, or experience. Play gradually with your skin and give full purpose to your orifices. Then I can degrade you in a way only we understand, my lovely slut. But that is not yet, we are not even in the beginning; you have to write to me first. I started this describing the end, but now I am going to end talking and you have to start writing me.
The Gateway
For a long time I have thought that D/s, or in general kinky people, naturally relate to the superheroes of comics. This is not really an original idea - many gay guys have a superheroe fetish, and it is not just because of the tight uniforms. The typical superheroe lives a double life to preserve his secret identity from his enemies. By day a conventional, perhaps conformist character, he transforms by night to live dangerous adventures in an exciting underground world.
Fortunately, the need for gay people to hide their orientation has greatly diminished, but the dicotomy is still there - and it has its own appeal. Kinky people are in a very similar situation (complete with tight outfits). Many of us are selective about who can know our interests, and to what degree. And this, I believe, will continue much longer than for gays, because some areas of kink are just harder for the mainstream to assimilate. So we have a double identity - a gateway that leads to an exciting, sometimes dark world. A world where sexuality and power are both more naked and more sophisticated than in "the surface". A world that is also inside us - the gateway leading not just to others, but to a part of ourselves that is often a surprise. The Great Unknown, right in our core.
It is not a trifle. And it is all a present we receive when we face our inner cravings - and fears.
Sed timeo dominas et dona ferentes.
This site has been a part of my life since 2009.
I have grown and went through many life changes.
My Husband is My Master. We rarely go into Master/slave mode but when we do its what we need.
I realize real serious bdsm is a lifestyle not play and Him and I are far from vanilla. We are deeply spiritual and energy aware so even if we are not practicing what most view as bdsm we have a deep dynamic.
We have been hit with many things over the years . There is always wave for every person. Ours seemed giantic lol but we are together.
I was owned by a Master for ten years in the past. I can see clearly now so many things about that time in my life. There are regrets but we cant go back. It was never meant to be something I could have as a real life in all ways. I wish I would of known myself more but it led to what I was suppose to find. It taught me many things. There were times I thought that It was not safe and I never trusted. I wish I could talk to him but I dont think that will ever happen. I understand why. I really think He thought I was something that I never was . The mind web was so layered I will never know. I rarely wonder anymore because I know I will never get answers.
So I am here...I am just here . I have a few friends here and there that log in.
Serenity
She walks into his lair with anxiety pulling at her as she watches her poise because he is a Master who holds great expectations. This excites her as her goal is to please him regardless of his high expectations. She knows he has had other slaves and she is eager to see where this leads, but he requires patience. She prostrates herself in front of him to show her submission and willingness. This act increases her anxiety but feeds her submission. This inspires the Master to pull the beast from within her, something so submissive must have an inner core that is her primal side. He wants to push her limits and chains her to the floor. He oils her because as he likes the marks, but he doesn’t want to rip her skin. He knows what his goal is and even the devil himself would be jealous of the effect that is yearning for. She was shackled to the floor with little to no movement allowed. He stood over her as she tried to hide her whimpers. She could feel the oil dripping around her thighs and in the crack of her ass. The Master asked if she was ok, and she took a moment to squeak out a yes Sir. She had to trust him, she knew this and found comfort that if he felt she was ready for such a journey then she was ready. She let go and opened herself giving the Master the ability to illicit the responses he was craving. The energy flowed with every interaction he created, she embraced it and as the pain and pleasure intertwined and came to climax her submission climbed with it. He brought her back down where she laid still but shackled limp and panting. He draped a blanket over her it was soft and warm, he placed a small pillow under her head, and he gave her small sips of water through a straw. He directed her to drink, and she did as told. He sat next to her watching as she slowly came back. Slowly he unshackled her and embraced her. She was now curled up to him on the floor where he continued aftercare. She was fulfilled as he was obviously proud of her and even told her so as he stroked her hair.
The sunset is rapidi will miss the intensityof blazing orange and rusted yellow.Hints of glorious red and hued pinksdissapearing; retreating fast the orb.Just one blink and half a century waslost behind the soft slopes of purple hills.Now, only a few clouds speak of whatwas once here. Their imperfect shapesreflecting a blaze of fire that hides in silence.i cannot handle Your silence.i will faithfully wait for You to rise and return.~ dirtydarling
Ms. Cosmic, tell us how you really feel about the most recent election results...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8VZX4sHn-4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35rHHEiNaIM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-3BI9AspYc
https://www.google.com/search?q=war+pigs+women&oq=war+pigs+women&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUyBggAEEUYOTIICAEQABgWGB4yCAgCEAAYFhgeMggIAxAAGBYYHjINCAQQABiGAxiABBiKBTINCAUQABiGAxiABBiKBTINCAYQABiGAxiABBiKBTINCAcQABiGAxiABBiKBTIKCAgQABiABBiiBDIKCAkQABiABBiiBNIBCDU3ODhqMGo3qAIIsAIB&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:dddeac4f,vid:Vj4SJolBPt0,st:0
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3SZu_KhWig
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vO1QyidBUPg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EWqTym2cQU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbNekA18FgM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EgwQG3MYp3o
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1kEjj3Ej68
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/gv_K7G13sXo lol
The Lighthouse Within: Illuminating Love and Power in Dynamic Union
I never knew a lo-, lo-, lo-, love like this
Gotta be special for me to write this
i tweaked this song with a higher pitch and a faster beat to really get into a deeper and more fulfilling emotional space than the song was. however, i am moving most of my platforms to something more professional ish and don't want to deal with the copyright. just know if you pitch it up and move it to a faster speed it's a different experience that is. beyonce's voice sounds more childish, impish, and little girl ish. a emotional and mental state i can resonate with more fully as an adult and little girl. the jayz voice sounds more of a stronger timber and more of a high hit on the drum sound....something more direct and focused and intentional and intense. the sounds in the background that are celebratory sound grander. the piano sounds angelic and full of joy, uplifting, something literally awesome.
awe·some
/ˈôsəm/
adjective
extremely impressive or daunting; inspiring great admiration, apprehension, or fear.
something other wordly, something in the clouds, something more expansive than earth ever can be.
Uh, uh, uh
This (uh, uh) is (uh, uh), ouu!
Cash, hit deposit, 24-carat faucets
Louis V and Goyard trunks all in the closet
Ain't shit change, the streets is still watching
And my little baby Blue is like, "Who gon' stop us, huh?"
Ain't no way to stop this love, ain't no space if everything is love
Representing for my hustlers all across the world (still)
Still dippin' in my low-lows, girl! (still)
I put it down for the 713 and we still got love for the streets (ow!)
We played it cool at the pool of the Cancun, VMA
Confidence you exude make the fools stay away
Me, I played the room, let the fools have they say
Fate had me sitting next to you on the plane
And I knew straight away, uh
The next time we would speak was like two years away
You had a man, you shut it down until you two had a break
I bet that dude rued the day
You kept me up on the phone while you were away
You came back, I let you set the date, Nobu on the plate
I brought my dude to play it cool, my first foolish mistake
Cash, hit deposit, 24-carat faucets
Louis V and Goyard trunks all in the closet
Ain't shit change, the streets is still watching
And my little baby Blue is like "Who gon' stop us, huh?"
Ain't no way to stop this love, ain't no space if everything is love
I'm representing for my hustlers all across the world (still)
Still dippin' in my low-lows, girl! (still), I put it down for the 713
And we still got love for the streets (ow!)
I never knew a lo-, lo-, lo-, love like this
Gotta be special for me to write this
Queen, I ain't mean no disrespect
But the way I network, it's hard for me to connect
My first time in the ocean went exactly as you'd expect
Meanwhile, you going hard, jumping off the top deck
A leap of faith, I knew I was up next
I never told you, but I told a few people we wed
Me, I'm off to Rome, you going back home instead
My first time in my life a live nigga felt dead
You came back, I had to act like it was cool in my head
Thoughts of jumping the broom, a player never been swept
Cash, hit deposit, 24-carat faucets
Louis V and Goyard trunks all in the closet
Ain't shit change, the streets is still watching
And my little baby Blue is like "Who gon' stop us, huh?"
I'm representing for my hustlers all across the world (still)
Still dippin' in my low-lows, girl! (still), I put it down for the 713
And we still got love for the streets (ow!)
To all the good girls that love hustlers
To the mothers that put up with us
To all the babies that suffered cause us
We only know love because of ya
this song talks about still being from where you are from. the 713. this song doesn't need to be decoded as deep as others.
it's a tale of two bodacious bombastic people. i see it in the daddy dominant and little girl personality and identities. strong, powerful, like greek gods in sculptures running the world. pushing the line between safe and da
If you are applying for a postion with us you need to keep in mind that each communication is part of the interview. So when we tell you to answer the 8 questions that can be found below in one of our other journal entries make sure to completely answer them all.
As we go through the process make sure you read our messages and answer completely and thoroughly all what is asked of you. In the end we go back and evealuate all of this before deciding if we think you are a good fit and serious about this.
Here is how our process goes.
1. You reach out to us first with a message introducing yourself, someimes we reach out to females we may be interested in and introduce ourselves and ask them if interested to do the same, either way you should be thorough in your answer.
2. Unless you read our profile and journals and answered the 8 questions, extra consideration if you did, we tell you to read everything ans answer the 8 questions.
3.. We ask you if you have any questions
4. we give you an email address for you to reply to so we can send you the house rules
5. You will review the house rules and ask any questions in them and once done decide if you are able and willing to live by them.
6. We give you and advanced questionaire to fill out and we ask any questions about it we need to know more about
7. We allow you to ask questions you may still need to know before deciding if you want this with us.
8. We decide if we want to try it with you and you do the same we exchange phone numbers voice verify each other
9. set up trial period
10. you do trial period and we discuss with you at end of it whether we are all in agreement to offer the position.
11. You get training collar for 6-12 months
12. Once we feel you are trained you get permanent colar.
Dont be afriad to talk to me, but can we talk about life first.
Always opened to talking to
Doms
Dommes
Switches
Slaves
Subs.
What I want...(I did not write this but it rings true for me).
I want flowers.
I want to whip you.
I want to stroke your cheek and smile into your eyes.
I want respect and awe and understanding and love.
I want foot rubs and leg rubs and back rubs and anywhere rubs.
I want you to know when to reach out to touch and when to kneel and wait.
I want you to want me fiercely, desire me utterly.
I want kisses. Little ones, fast ones, fierce ones, thigh-clenching-good kisses.
I want you to touch me like you’re trying to memorize the texture and shape of me.
I want affection and cuddling.
I want you to drop your eyes when I demand and meet my eyes when we talk.
I want you to miss me terribly when we’re apart.
I want you to know what you mean to me, how I cherish you.
I want humor and debate and dialog.
I want you to kiss the side of my neck while your hands grip my hips, my back.
I want to see you crawl – just for me.
I want to look at you in that special way and see you breathe deeply with desire and anticipation of what you know is to come.
I want to fuck you, penetrate you, tease you, deny you, please you, torture you.
I want....
You.
LongTerm Chastity
The waves of denial come and go.There are days when i forget that i am locked up, then a wave of reality hits and the feeling of helplessness and inferiority pound on my psyche.The need to be teased, aroused and denied as others enjoy their sexual freedoms intensifies..i started this journey out of curiosity and now i am overwhelmed with the need to be locked.i have gone back to my original device. It is open and i can keep myself clean without removing it.i am wondering if i should forgo any shaving, thus eliminating any reason for the occasional unlocking.Thoughts of making this permanent and irreversible have entered my mind. It would be easy enough to do: Hex button Stainless Steel screw, a tap, Locktite 266.
(Don't forget to round out the Hex hole with a f=drill bit after it is tightly in place, to render the Hex key useless.)
.Yes, the thought has crossed my mind..........a few times..
1. In your first message don't say something like. " Hi how are you doing?" and that is your only message/words. I won't even answer that. Be more upfront.
2. Please understand here is what I am NOT looking for
A. Not looking for someone that is married
B. Not looking for a weekend here and there
C. Not looking for someone that drinks, smokes and addicted to drugs. (herb is ok)
D. Not looking to change your diapers
E. Not looking for attention seekers or someone high maintance
F. Not looking for someone that is new and looking for someone to train it (unless your ready to go full in)
G. I'm not a Pro and I'm not looking to play games.
H. Not looking for someone that isn't willing to better themselves
I. In general I'm not looking for a city person that is afraid to get dirty.
J. I'm not " needy " I'm more interested in finding a service slave/sub.
K. I'm not interested in seeing your ass pictures.
I'll probably add more to this list later. But HOPEFULLY you read this and don't bother writing if ...your not what I'm looking for. I try to make things simple and to the point.
p.s. I'M NOT LOOKING FOR A DOM. I PROMISE YOU I WILL NEVER BE YOUR SUB OR SLAVE. I'm not an egotistic person and I do my share of what needs to be done around here. I believe in harmony.
I want a dominate woman to take me under her wing. To feminize and transform me into a full woman. I mean learn how to sit, walk, talk, think,...... everything. But to also transform me physically as well. Hormones, body contouring, breast implants, FFS and finally SRS.To transform me into a woman so much that no one would know that I was EVER a male.
WARNING:
POLITICAL RACIST SEXIST DEFAMATORY PROFANE STATEMENTS FOLLOW!
Keep OUR laws off of MY body.
Or be prepared for US to start making laws for YOUR body.
The only reason why it is not the law of this land that a woman may do with her body as she sees fit, is because MEN do not stand up for our rights as WOMEN. Don’t play games with Me and tell Me you are all about respect for women and women’s rights and you LOVE AND WORSHIP women and then tell us we don’t have what if farking takes to govern our own bodies! Bloody hypocrites! Don’t tell Me it is the politicians, women, men, or any other such thing which makes the law so. It is because of YOU and your primitive mind set and ideologies which remove My Sovereignty over My body.
I’m an independent. I am prolife and prochoice, when it makes sense and does not infringe on another free person’s rights.
You don’t get to choose what is right for My body. You and the law HAVE NO BUSINESS IN OR ON MY CUNT!
God gave this Power to women. We are made for it and with this God gave us the ability to deal with this Power – without Men. Just like Men are given their own Power and the tools to appropriately deal with it.
Now, if you continue to come after My body and My rights, be prepared for Me to come after you and your body parts. Any sexual or domestic offense committed by a male against a female, automatic SNIP SNIP! You don’t want Me playing around with your cock and balls without consent? Then STAY OFF OF MY DICK!
Men competing in Olympics, or women’s sports. This is a no brainer people. We are a tad more civilized than legalizing and celebration of the beating of women. Come on!
I'm a Marionette
By Abba performed by Ghost
You're so free," that's what everybody's telling meYet I feel I'm like an outward-bound, pushed around, refugeeSomething's wrong, got a feeling that I don't belongAs if I had come from outer space, out of place, like King KongI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clownLike a doll, like a puppet with no will at allAnd somebody told me how to talk, how to walk, how to fallCan't complain, I've got no-one but myself to blameSomething's happening I can't control, lost my hold, it's insaneI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clown"Look this way, just a little smile," is what they say"You look better on the photograph if you laugh, that's okay""You're so free," that's what everybody's telling meYet I feel I'm like an outward-bound, pushed around, refugeeI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clown
September 2025 Update
Well, what to update on? I've had precious little innteresting contact on this site for a while. I did have some medical issues toward the end of last year from which I am now recovering. I was in a relationship where the partner in question appears to have ghosted me. I guess that makes me single once again? I havent heard from him in over 6 months after all. To me, I'm single even if neither of us spoke the words 'we're broken up'.
I've maintained my chastity now since March 2020. I don't think i could live without it. I too, still regularly practice submissive poses, exercises, and enjoy self bondage sessions in lieu of a dominant.
My transition has been a drawn out process due to my illness earlier this year. I do take hormone treatments, and keep myself with long hair, and shaved below the top of my head. I dress as femme all day every day. I love as a woman every day. However, bottom surgery has not yet been approved for me. The psychiatrist I had lined up to provide my second medical declartion rejected it back in January, meaning I've been fighting both an illness and the NHS since then to get the documents and reports I need for my GRC. If you know what that means, you'll know the frustration. If you don't let me simplify it. I've been living as a woman now for nearly four years, but I can't have that legally recognised just yet because of paperwork.
If you want someone who is submissive and loyal, I am that. However, be warned that though I intend to undergo bottom surgery, that is still a little while away for me.
Covid is over and we had our first play party in two years!Our BDSM circle consists of six Master and slave couples and our family of Master James Mistress Tabitha and myself. It was more of a bondage orgy than anything else. The only rule was that no Master could fuck his own slave.As the men recovered us slaves were encouraged to lick each other into a blissful state.We thought that it was just going to be nothing but play. Master Steven came into the room with a gallon ziplock bag of peeled ginger roots. Us slaves were told to get into a circle, drop to our hands and knees and each slave was given a ginger root to insert into her slave sisters ass.If you have never had a peeled ginger root in your ass it is, well...... The truth is that you don't know if you should shit, piss or cum or do all three all at once. It is an overwhelming series of sensations. Should you decide to try this for the first time use the ginger as soon as you peel it. If you wish to make the pain almost unberable then peel the ginger root and put it in a baggie overnight first. The ginger root will "sweat" and the sensations will be greatly amplified.It was so very delightful to cuddle with my slave sisters once again.
Family is the most precious of all the worlds gifts. Family need not be by blood but just created out of love, respect and appreciation for the others in your group. We are blessed!
slave janet
night air, a primal rhythm that echoed through the park. Lily's cries mingled with his grunts, their bodies moving as one, driven by the raw, animalistic need. He reached around, his fingers finding her swollen clit, rubbing and pinching it in time with his thrusts.
"Cum for me, you little slut," he demanded, his voice harsh and commanding. "Cum on my cock."
Lily's body tightened, every nerve alight with sensation. She was on the edge, teetering between pain and pleasure, as his fingers worked her clit and his cock filled her to the brim. With a final, powerful thrust, she shattered, her orgasm ripping through her, causing her to scream into the night.
As her body convulsed around him, he groaned, his own release building. He gripped her hips tightly, holding her still as he emptied himself deep within her, filling her with his hot seed.
They stood there, panting, their bodies still joined, as the echoes of their passion faded into the night. Lily's mind reeled, struggling to process what had just happened. She had been taken, used, and yet, she couldn't deny the pleasure she had experienced.
The man released her, stepping back, his breathing heavy. "You were a good fuck, Lily. But now, I must go."
Lily's legs trembled as she leaned against the tree, her body still throbbing with the aftershocks of her orgasm. She watched as he zipped up his pants, the moonlight glinting off his hooded figure.
"Wait..." she whispered, her voice hoarse. "Who are you?"
Some people smhSo this guy contacts me, supposedly part of a Dom couple, with condolences saying he's sorry Master James passed away. Many have done that and I thank yoiu all for your kind thoughts, words and prayers.But this one guy then wants pictures, I say that I'm still happily owned by Mistress Tabitha and frankly we don't pass out pictures to strangers.He then says he wants g rated pictures and I remind him that my headshots from my younger days when I was trying to become a model are on my profile as well as a few that are more reresentative of my current age. I also politely inform him for about the fifth time that I am NOT interested in him and he should be on his way.Now he's angry and tells me that the pictures are too pretty to be me. I need to send him a nude while holding a sign with his name on it to prove that I'm real or he will declare me a fake! LOLLook at my profile. I CLEARLY state that I'm owned and not looking. Why would a fake tell people not to waste time chatting with her or sending her pictures?My guess is that there is an angry 14 year old boy out there with a bottle of his mommies hand lotion looking for love! LOL
Hmm... a journal entry, eh? Not quite sure what to say here... or even if this thing works. Let alone if anyone out there will read this.
Let's just start with a basic confession: I love sex, and I like it rough. I have had fantasies about being raped ever since I a girl. Of course back then, those fantasies were pretty tame. Mostly being captured by a villian who would tie me up and keep me in his dungeon where he would, G, try to kiss me! As I got older the fantasies became... how say I say it.. more graphic... The more I think about it, the more I realize that my rape fantasies pretty much follow a basic pattern: I'm out and about... It's night... I'm alone... and I find myself in a bad situation... and then one or more (usually more) tough looking guys show up and start getting into my person space, then they start trash talking and insulting me, then they start touching me and pushing me around. Naturally I resist and try to get away, I usually am able to run away for a bit then they catch me again. after that, they usually rip off all my clothes, hold me down, and have there way with me... The specific details change, but that's the basic formula...
We'll see who reads this...
Catch ya later,
subMeghan
It’s been a little while and I want to go over the rules about permission again.
“Okay, but… did I make a mistake?”
No. You didn’t do anything wrong. I just want to make sure we go over this now and then so I know you understand and remember it completely.
“Okay. May I edge please?”
No. No touching right now.
“But-”
I said no.
“Okay.”
Now. What do you remember about how permission works?
“Um… I need your permission to touch and to cum.”
That’s true.
“And to use the bathroom or spend any money over twenty dollars, and-”
That’s all true, but that’s not what I’m talking about today.
“It’s not?”
No. I’m talking about the other kind of permission.
“The other…? Oh! Sir, no. I don’t like talking about that.”
I know you don’t. But it’s important.
“Sir, please. You have permission for everything always.”
No. That’s not how it works. Now that kind of talk only lets me know how important it is to go over this again.
Instead of getting mad at Me for knowing what I want, you should look at what you are doing. It is not a submissive's gift to project their fantasies onto a Domme. If you are unsure of what that means, feel free to ask. I'm not sorry if holding My Boundaries upsets you.
7/25/24- Theres a part of our dynamic that doesnt seem to be acknowleged for what it is..
" Our aim is to connect with the right female who resonates with the idea and has the desire of joining a household but specifically our household... My first girl oversees everyone when I am not present, as work takes me for periods of time. Your domestic duties in the home would be light as its shared amongst the three of you. Simple mundane tasks that your basic upkeep any nucular family household would require, with opportunities to take on more responsibilities if desired over time. Your outward role may be that of a “roommate” or a "housekeeper” to those who don’t know the lifestyle,"
No this doesn't mean were looking for a maid. We're looking for a sub and were trying to make it clear that we expect other people to not understand the lifestyle choices everyone makes and that if you are living in this house you will have house responsibilities and expected to help keep it clean. This is common sense. Yes there are two other females in this home but that doesn't mean you don't get to do anything but be in a bed 24/7.... I mean we have to let you out to shower at some point right? All jokes aside- hoping to find a sub that is service orientated, has slave tendency, or wants to be a slave.
I've got some off time. But next week it is back to 6 days a week.
I still wonder what it is with folks. If you want to talk fine. Im down with that. I enjoy meeting new people and potentially making friends. However... don't make promisses you have no intention of keeping. Again, I can't say this enough, grow up and if the person you are talking to just isnt relationship material, tell them. Do not just ghost them. Its cruel.
Yes this is a "fetish" site. Yes, some get off on cruel acts committed to them. But prolonged mental cruelty will ruin a person.
I miss the good ole days. When if you had a problem with someone, you just told them and if it could be worked out, you did so. If not you walked away and left it alone. If you were not interested in someone, you just told them. Not ghost them and leaving them wondering what they did wrong. You got to know a person, the real person before jumping into commitments. And a whole lot more.
What is worse, I have seen this behavior more and more from Gen X and later. What the hell?
Everyone has their fantasies. Their dreams and desires. Everyone has their own idea on what and how this lifestyle is and should be. However, at the end of the day, we are human beings. Lets start there and start acting like it.
Winners and losers can often be distinguished by their propensity to take action and their inclination to serve others. Winners are those who recognize opportunities and are willing to step out of their comfort zones to seize them. They understand that success requires effort, resilience, and a proactive attitude. Winners don't shy away from challenges; they face them head-on and learn from their experiences. Moreover, winners often find fulfillment in helping others achieve their goals, knowing that service enriches both their lives and the lives of those they assist. In contrast, losers tend to be more passive, often waiting for the perfect moment or fearing the risks associated with action. They may have great ideas and potential but lack the drive to bring them to fruition. This hesitation and inertia often lead to missed opportunities and regret. Additionally, a lack of willingness to serve others can limit their growth and connection with the broader community. Ultimately, the difference between winners and losers lies in the willingness to act decisively, persistently pursue their goals, and contribute positively to the lives of others.
Presently screening and vetting 43 prospective owners from US, UK, Australia.Two are former military.They are the first two it has gone to voice communication. Most presently.Building up trust is a very important before even a physical meeting to see if they truly know how to have a real slave.Its cautious after being in this Lifestyle for 37 years.And being a former Collarspace mentor and Collarspace admin.Dealt with far too many craziness and right nutters.
I was asked about the history of M/s in the U.S. so I put together this paper for my class that I teach. As many of you know, I teach classes about our lifestyle.
Consensual Master/slave (M/s) relationships form a distinctive branch of the larger BDSM world, built on explicit consent and mutual trust rather than coercion. Though the language echoes the United States’ painful legacy of slavery, within this context “slave” refers to a self-chosen role in which adults negotiate the terms of authority, service, and the freedom to leave at any time. Tracing the history of these relationships reveals a story of gradual emergence from secrecy to visibility and of a community that continually refines its ethical principles.
Long before the term BDSM existed, underground currents of erotic power exchange ran through American life. In the nineteenth century, small “flagellation societies” and clandestine magazines catered to people fascinated by ritualized dominance and discipline. Early-twentieth-century fetish photography and private clubs in cities like New York and Chicago hinted at a subculture that could not yet show itself openly, constrained by strict obscenity laws and the threat of arrest.
After World War II, a more public foundation appeared. Returning veterans formed motorcycle clubs and gay leather bars, creating what became known as leather culture. These spaces celebrated hierarchy, uniforms, and protocol—values familiar to men who had served in the military and who now sought camaraderie and structured erotic play. San Francisco’s South of Market district, Chicago’s Gold Coast bar, and New York’s Greenwich Village all nurtured this emerging aesthetic. While not every leather relationship was explicitly Master/slave, the emphasis on ritual service and clearly defined roles foreshadowed the dynamics to come.
The social upheavals of the 1960s and 1970s brought the first real stirrings of public organization. In 1971 the Eulenspiegel Society, or TES, was founded in New York as an educational and social group for people interested in consensual BDSM. TES meetings offered a rare safe space to discuss negotiation, service, and authority exchange. At the same time the gay liberation movement and the post-Stonewall push for visibility encouraged practitioners to speak more openly, while feminist debates over sexuality and power sharpened the community’s thinking about agency and consent. It was during this era that the term “Master/slave” began to be used more deliberately to describe ongoing power-exchange relationships rather than isolated encounters.
Through the 1980s and 1990s the community expanded and codified its ethics. The principles of “Safe, Sane, and Consensual” became a rallying cry, soon joined by the idea of “Risk-Aware Consensual Kink,” which acknowledged that all play carries some danger if undertaken without careful negotiation. National gatherings such as Living in Leather and organizations like the National Leather Association connected practitioners across genders and orientations. Amid the HIV/AIDS crisis, leather and M/s groups became hubs of health education and mutual support. Competitions such as International Mr. Leather made formal presentations of Master/slave relationships more visible, and writers like Guy Baldwin explored the psychology of dominance and submission in influential essays and books.
The arrival of the internet around the turn of the millennium transformed everything again. Email lists, online forums, and later social networks such as FetLife allowed people in small towns or conservative regions to find community, share protocols, and even post detailed M/s contracts. Education went global as conferences could draw participants from every region. Meanwhile, mainstream attention—from documentaries to the runaway success of Fifty Shades of Grey—brought BDSM into living rooms and office break rooms, if often in sensational or inaccurate ways. Academic researchers began publishing peer-reviewed studies that showed consensual power exchange could be compatible with psychological health and relationship satisfaction.
Today’s M/s community in the United States is strikingly diverse. Participants span every gender, orientation, and cultural background. Annual gatherings such as the Master/slave Conference in Washington, D.C., offer advanced classes on negotiation, long-term dynamics, and the philosophy of service and ownership. Many households create written agreements spelling out duties, limits, and the right to revoke consent, underscoring that autonomy remains central even within total-power dynamics. Yet the term “slave” still prompts careful reflection. Some prefer alternatives like “property” or “servant,” while others reclaim the word as a conscious statement of agency. This ongoing conversation shows how the community remains attentive to the country’s history of chattel slavery and the need for language that honors both freedom and responsibility.
From clandestine nineteenth-century societies to today’s internet-connected conferences, the evolution of consensual Master/slave relationships in the United States is a story of people turning hierarchy into intimacy. Over more than a century, practitioners have built a culture grounded in negotiation, education, and mutual respect. Far from re-enacting oppression, these relationships transform the language of mastery and service into a chosen path of trust, discipline, and personal liberation.
Standards vs Micromanaging
I've pondered the question of control for years. Early on I had the notion in my head that the more controlling you were the more dominant you were. Like a badge of achievement that you got to claim, a contest you won if you were the most controlling. I still see that basic frame of thought all over the place. I also see the thinking that the more intense the dynamic the more controlling/micro managey it is.
I've tried various levels and forms of control with women over the years and whenever I've strived for micromanagement it's been entirely unsatisfying. I've also found that the men who seem most interested in micromanagement are trying to fill some sort of hole within themselves. I remember one woman I met who wanted complete micromanagement and frankly it was the emptiest and most robotic experience of my life.
Hence the internal struggle in trying to understand the controlling impulses I have, the need for power and ownership, while also not really having the patience or desire to stand over someone's shoulder minute by minute.
I finally found some phrasing that I think helps to express what I actually think and desire.
Let's seeee.... okay. Ideal setup
Im looking for someone that is 1000% supportive of me and HRT. I wish to find a place where I can mentally dissolve who I currently am and evolve into a genuine bimbo sissy trans doll. And yes I used sissy and trans in the same sentence. Is it possible. Yes. Sissy referring to ones submissive girly play toy. And trans doll as in well. Me :). Petite smooth tight body. Speaking of body. Let's talk about that. So apparently I have an exotic one of a kind body .... I know right. Hard for me to believe it too :p. Anywho. I'm very very very great full for having it and would love to put it to use where I can generate climaxual pleasure for anyone. What do I mean by this ... well idk to be honest. But I'd like to have gym access and/or an encouraging person that help maintain the motivation to get as sexy and as feminine as I could get. Minus the bottom surgery. Yes u read right. Not going to do any cutting off down there. However. I am open to some body modz to a certain extent. Of course nothing deforming or any such thing. (Please don't ask what) if anything asking if I'm open too.. whatever ur kinky desire is. And I'll let u know if I'd be willing.
Anywho. Um so yes. I tend to be a little high on the kinky side. Which is a very VERY Vague statement. However let's just say. I really really do truly enjoy seeing the satifaction one get from doing/not doing/ treating or being a certain way with me. Again very vague not trying to get into detail just showing u the willingness I have to satisfy you. Umm so. With that been said.
I seek someone who will take me in own me collar me and use me for their twisted pleasure. How far am I willing to go. Ask. Me. But it just how far am I willing to go lol. Ask me how do I feel about this or have u done things like that. What about if we xyz. . But umm okk so yaw. Truly one of a kind here. Appearley something very very special. An amazing eye candy. Incredibly smart. I credavly capable of achieving ur satifaction :). I like to be told/force. Made to submit my body for ur pleasure lol. Ummm. Well yawww. Serious inquires please. I'm ready to purchase a round trip ticket to you. Where towards the end we'll see if I should stay. Or go. No games no bs. If ur catfish fake poor hugene ethic or manors I will initiate blan b. I ask please no hard feeling. We're all chasing that life we have in our mind
.idk if any of this came out the way I inted as in ur understanding but I like to post genuine articles that flow right. Off the top of my head. I feel its more genuine since there is a not much time to contemplate the topic potentially leading to an influenced decision other the my own thanks for readjng
A recent message asked me to name "one experience thats shaped your journey in the BDSM world", and I thougt of this poem. It is about a scene I monitored in the early summer of 1999. The title is the name of the wonderful, beautiful woman, a friend, mentor, and so much more, to so many people over the years, and the sub in the scene. I miss you, "Mom".
Allena
Beautiful golden hillside Lush with fine, silken grasses Trembling as he works his Mastery With every crack like thunder, Another crimson dewdrop appears; Meeting one another, dancing into rivulets, Until her hills and valleys run with ruby wine. Over and over, agony meets ecstacy; Mingling tears with sighs As she shudders with pleasure and pain. I shudder too, as I watch. Start at every strike; Feel each blow as it lands. I imagine I am there beside her; And for a precious moment...We are one.
©Khaos WolfKat 2001
As we stand at the threshold between years, there is a natural pause that invites reflection. The closing of 2025 is not merely the turning of a calendar page—it is a moment to breathe, to remember, and to take stock of who we were, what we endured, and how we grew.
2025 was a year that asked much of us.
It was not a year defined by a single event or headline, but by accumulation—of effort, of resilience, of quiet victories and hard lessons. It was a year that reminded us that progress is rarely loud, and strength is often forged in silence.
For many, 2025 began with hope tempered by realism. The world continued to navigate uncertainty—economic shifts, global tensions, evolving technologies, and changing social landscapes. We were asked to adapt yet again, to rethink how we work, how we connect, and how we care for one another. And while adaptation can be exhausting, it is also proof of endurance. We are still here.
This past year reminded us that stability is not guaranteed, but neither is despair. Even in moments of strain, communities showed up. Neighbors helped neighbors. Families reconnected. Friends checked in when it mattered most. In ways both big and small, people chose compassion over indifference—and that choice matters more than we often realize.
2025 also challenged our understanding of time. It moved quickly and slowly all at once. Weeks red together, yet certain moments stand crystal clear: a conversation that changed us, a loss that reshaped us, a success that reminded us of our own capability. These moments form the true record of a year—not the dates, but the meaning we attach to them.
For some, 2025 brought achievement—goals reached, milestones earned, dreams realized after years of effort. For others, it brought disappointment, delay, or grie
I’m not interested in disrespectful, fake subs who throw temper tantrums like toddlers denied candy. I’m not here for a drama queen who thinks his pussy is somehow better than mine — sweetie, we’re not comparing fruit here. Life’s too short for attitude, bad manners, and ego contests. If you want my time, bring respect, humor, and a little humility… otherwise, you can keep your crown and your tantrums for someone else’s court
I thought I knew what was wrong. But I saw a specialist and they talked medical blah blah and so for a few weeks I've been walking around thinking I have a rare cancer. Tests were ordered, biopsies taken, more specialists, antibiotics prescribed. I started mental checklists so if it's worse case scenario I get shit done before I'm not capable. I cried a lot. The not knowing of so many important things that might mean everything. Or nothing. Tests coming back inconclusive, waiting on next steps. It's a lot to add to your agenda since the world doesn't stop for a new crisis. It's tiring to be this stressed.
After all of this, the tests, the time, the tears, that first specialist agreed with my original diagnosis. If they would have listened to me on that first visit I'd be healed by now. Fuck silver linings, I'm pissed.
Not out of the woods just yet, one more specialist to go. But it's looking good enough that I can be uppity about the whole situation. Still, fingers crossed, okay? Thanks.
This is just a quick PSA, I have filled out and returned my ballot, so you can stop all the TV ads and yard signs and news coverage now.
Thank you.
DOMINANT WOMEN BEWARE!
Well, Mr. Beenhere25yearsandf*ckingwithdominantwomen contacted Me again. I have a feeling he has made a full time job of this shinnanigans. Contacts women or waits to be contacted, then has a 3 month relation, then disappears due to multiple guardians (LOL), dual citizenship (USA/UK), testing on his ALIEN DNA (LOL), OH LORD the list and LIES gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe ON AND ON! Then someone else contacts you, given your name from Mr. Mindf*ck, and you quickly realize it is the same person! Back and forth, round and round, LIES AND MORE LIES. Emails from yahoo, aol, gmail (his favorite) and forget about it now that AI and ChatGPT have arrived. He is a vertible keyboard warrior. Dont be fooled if given a phone number. You'll work for it, oh yes indeed and it will again be a series of shoots and ladders! He is a L I A R, F R A U D and he even has ropped in a person or two for his mind games. Can you imagine somone playing at this over 25 years?!
If I have said it once, I've said it 100 times - verify verify verify and don't put one ounce of effort into another submissive man until HE PROVES HIMSELF TO YOU! Phone, in-person VERIFICATION. And this goes for the other wankers as well. Even the ones who send a copy of license and passport. Only in person, face to face, contracts signed and skin in the game proves a mans worth.
Induction or Trial Period
After inspection there may be a trial period. This is a time when the prospective slave property experiences what being My property entails. That is slave may leave at any time up until commitment.
This trial period lasts until either Master or it decide to leave off or slave commits to becoming My chattel. In terms of time, the induction may last one day or up to 6 months. As stated above, at any time during the trial period either may terminate the process. During this time slave may exercise choice. While after commitment, slave looses any opportunity for choice except as the Master may allow.
I have been asked to clarify induction. Please excuse the redundancy.
During the period of induction, aka trial, slave may leave at any time. Or, Master may dismiss it any time. There are no conditions for termination of trial; no reason is needed.
If during that trial period if both agree slave may become total chattel property of Mine.
Notice, choice is available to slave up until both agree differently.
I suppose I need to update this along with my profile. As I said in my new profile, I am currently living in Virginia and owned as part of a household so I’m no longer looking. I only come here occasionally to chat with a few people I’ve come to know.
A lot changed for me at the end of last year when I moved here. This is only the second ownership situation I’ve ever been in. I have a scattered history with the couple who now own me so they aren’t a complete unknown but much of what is expected of me is very new. I am their new alpha and expected to manage the general household as well as some aspects of others that are brought in, either short term or long term. Their prior long-term slave left the household last month and they have taken on a new one, at least on a trial basis. I’m not sure if she’ll last but the mistress has faith in her becoming a permanent part of the household so time will tell I guess.
For those who were curious about my tech gig work, I took a couple months off and I’m starting some new work next month. It’ll be tricky balancing that with my household duties so I’m not putting much on my plate at first. On the plus side, since I don’t have any expenses here, all of what I take in can go toward investing my future. I guess that’ll be yet another new situation for me.. lol
As the profile edit didn't pass inspection, here it is
This is not the profile of SensualOrgasmDom69. Please look elsewhere for that kind of thing
Fuck, I hate that this thing needs me to update my age
Lets get straight to the point. (and I added stuff!) (twice now) (scratch that, 3rd edit)
I am not a nice person. I am not here to find the love of my life.Least I don't think so, never say never.
I am not a ropes and floggers, leather and latex kind of person. This is not some bit of bedroom fun, but just who I am. Controlling, demanding, sadistic and generally uncaring when it suits me. I like to explore where others dare not, both with the body and mind.
What I am here to find is whatever takes my fancy. It could be easier to say what will not take my fancy. Demanding, princess types are certainly out, as are those who require a massive romance aspect. Sure I can offer affection when it suits me, but overall its not something that should be expected in bulk. Just something I can understand can be required much as a car requires an oil change every now and then. Heck, sometimes even I need that kind of downtime.
I am the kind that gives kink a bad name. I would happily take on one with poor self-esteem, not to "fix" them, but as a way of controlling them. Someone who will lower themselves to the level I desire, someone who can live without rights. I find interest in things normally unacceptable. I'm not that bothered about looks and such, I just want someone who will put up with whatever I throw at them.
I think D could be my favourite letter for what I want, downtrodden, dejected, dependant, desperate, doormat, perhaps even damaged. Even if you are not these, but want to be, or will be these at times, there could be opportunity.
I know what I seek is difficult to find, especially on a long-term basis, so I would perhaps consider other arrangements, chat only, occasionals, part-time and so on, although my preference is for something regular, on-going, something where there is time to build deeper trust, explore hidden alleyways of the minds, to actually learn each other.
I'm not likely to be on here much, it is very much a case of nothing ventured, nothing gained. However I do get mail notifications, so anyone who does decide to message me will be read soon after.
Totally single, can travel, can accommodate
The subject of politics came up during a recent talk with a submissive man and it quickly went to the subject of abortion, and I had some marvelous revelations on the subject of politics and religion and sex. I paraphrase in part and the rest is history...
"I voted for Trump - his heart is in a good place"
"I think his heart could be in a good place yet he took action to ensure that My right to sovereignty over My body was abolished. What the fuck is that?"
"Well, he didn't do it to you."
"Yes, yes he did. He placed two Supreme Court Justices to help overturn Roe v Wade."
"Ruth Bader Ginsberg didn't really believe in blah blah blah"
"I don't care what she believed in, no one has a right to control My body."
"So how long? How many weeks?"
"How many weeks for what? There are NO weeks. This is not anyone else's decision."
"Well, that's murder."
"Who says? You? Your friends, your church, your politics?"
"Do you believe in murder?"
"Who are we murdering? Do you have leather cowhide seats and shoes on your feet? How about all the meat which you eat - that is murder - terminating life - where are the rules? Why is it murder if I am terminating the propagation of cells within My body? Are we murdering cancer? Who told you you get to choose what is okay to call murder and what is not? Who told you you could decide for Me? I terminate those cells in My body from manifesting and it is My right to do so."
"I didn't say murder."
"Yes you did. You said at what time, how many weeks does it become murder. You are now classifying Me as a murderer if I conduct business on My body."
Silence.
"What I am saying is, you cannot speak to Me about this subject. You have no idea what you are talking about. No one is telling you you have to pay $500 a month for a life, if you conceive with a woman. No one is controlling your sex! You do not have a right, no one does and it's none of your business. Is this an issue of the Bible? Who told the bible it had ANY business in My cunt? This is My body. No one gets to decide what happens with it except for Me. Period.
"Well what if you want the baby and the mother doesn't?"
"Tough cookies! TOO bad. That is not a decision for you to make and you don't then get to have some tantrum and make Me have a child - that is bloody bullshit! What the fuck are we talking about? You don't get to claim some part of My sex just because you have a constant erection and implanted in Me. You made a D O N A T I O N. Once you implant your seed, you gave up the rights to that seed. Once it passes to Me, it then belongs to Me. What are you, some indian giver? If you want some commitment to My sex, then that has to be in some kind of sex prenup. I can sign right on the dotted line, I, Ms. C do agree to have one sub ______ pour his seed into My cunt and thereby give him rights over My cunt to then decide whether I and My body, agree to have or have not to bring forth life from My body.
Anything else is Psychological Rape and I don't agree with that!
Can you imagine going to the bank and depositing your funds and the bank says, hey we reserve the right to borrow your money indefinitely and with variable interest depending on whether we are making a profit." LOL
At one point in the discussion, I had to ask:
Why the fuck do you believe you have some dominion over My cunt? Do I have control over your cock? Legally? lol
Here is the last arguement and listen up here boys and girls - who the fuck are you to decide what life is of value and what life is not? Human life is more important than all other life forms??? Are you seriously going to pander that self righteous malarky on Me? lol
Humans are SOOOOOOOO self absorbed and elitist and primitive.
And please, shut the Bible thumping door right now. I will pay the price with My maker in My own time of this you can be assured and THAT, My wayward PRIMATE is NONE of your concern!
So I ask again, who gave you the right to get all up into My stuff and stake some claim over it?
Why do you think you have ANY rights over My body and what happens with it?
WHY DO YOU CARE ABOUT MY / WOMAN'S BLOODY CUNT??? It truly is NONE of YOUR business!
Take care of your own junk and leave ours alone!
No apologies offered.
Here is a novel idea; how about a bar code (back of your ID) which tells all about you, drugs, diseases, health issues, whether or not you grant authority over your cunt/dick to a sexual partner, NSA, marriage minded. Then we can just scan one another and be done with the charade!
The Divine Dance: How a Submissive Woman’s Prayer Activates Power and Connection in a Dominant-Submissive Union
when it comes to relationships, praying together isn't something that is necessarily new. or unique. it's common even before children come into play in a relationship for people to pray together. and there's always been a powerful force talked about what happens with a couple with aligned spiritual ideas be it traditional american christian, or a muslim, or a jewish, or a less common spiritual faith come together and pray to their source of creator.
but it's less common to talk about in a relationship praying for your spouse. and then when it is, it's in the framework of uplifting your spouse up. and the conversation sort of stopping there.
but there's actually another layer that is often not talked about. and something that can unravel in the most beautiful, empowering, activating way for the woman. in a spiritual, physical, emotional, psychological way.
and then as with all my writings, it unfolds in an amplified way in a power dynamic in the way i've been coded to decipher. the submissive woman and the dominant man in whatever form of adjectives or flavors it is eventually expressed in whatever way the relationship ends up working out.
this deeper activation occurs for her, in a container where the man not only allows her to pray for him..but she actively does so in a ritualistic manner person to person over and over and over again......something awakens in herself. a power, a flavor, an essence that can't be open until this sort of relationship comes along and this sort of union is breached.
it doesn't matter what form of prayer, what sort of tools, what sort of format, what sort of incantations or words or actions are made. it all boils down to the same result.
once the session starts a fire is kindled in the heart chakra. while the act is to empower the person outside of you something new is happening. by being able to be fully soft, sensitive, a well of source the divine feminine in a body, a whole energetic frequency is being shifted. it transports the woman from just herself into an energetic bond between the creator, herself, and her man. and in this she becomes a lightbulb.
head to toe, spirals of light codes activations are occurring. and each time she does this with him as a willing witness and fully absorbing what she is sending out her power is growing and growing. not a power of force of action or of anything masculine that we think...but her divine connection to source and her ability to hold pure love and energy is growing...her reservoir is expanding. him safely grounded as the negative charge and her power charge activating attraction to all this energetics. an amazing dance of grounding and expansion.
most relationships don't work like this. most relationships are mutual where both people are even. praying for each other...is rare. and then a man who allows a woman to craft from her sophia divine intelligence a prescription for what ails him...and to willingly do so over and over and fully receive. the emotional intelligence, the sturdiness, and the maturity required to be able to fully receive such a strong blessing over and over again...most men are not able to hold.
and yet it exists....and it has for time and time again. power dynamic relationships aren't new....they just are often the path less chosen......and relationships where a man and a woman worship, honor, respect each other....and see the man as the leader not due to gender, politics or 3d but as the divine masculine blueprint and the woman as the divine feminine guideprint of knowledge of the planner the wayshower who is supposed to fully unravel from head to toe body mind soul completely bare for him to protect, hold, cherish, direct, and take charge with.....it happens.....even if it's rare it happens.
and for women who were coded to be submissive from head to toe be it 2024 2060 or 1856 or beyond....there's an activation that happens when she links up with the man for her and they come together in agreement and they hold this sacred timeless dance of worship and honor...and she engages in her part of tapping into source and prays for her man.
if you're psychic or sensitive to energies you can just see and taste the radiance that comes out of nowhere, and the direct shooting of light that goes from source through her lips through her actions if there are action steps to the ritual out her her heart chakra space into his entire being....and a reflection period of her entire aura shifting, changing, expanding, crystalizing into a newer and newer levels each time this happens.....
through praising and honoring him.....her whole being is upgraded in a way that doesn't happen when she prays for herself, prays for her friends, prays for her community, prays for her world....
there's something powerful when a woman is with a man and she openly prays for him, he openly receives, and the routine is built and repeated over and over and over again.
when she gives freely from the heart, the energy multiples. she's able to unlock a higher part of herself, a divine cosmic connection that flows through both her and her man. the act of service, worship, and prayer becomes a dance with the universe. where she and him rise and elevate together. and her heart expands with that energy.
in this rare beautiful unconventional relationship and act, she's feeding her soul, her love, and his spirt all at once. it feels so powerful and so natural and so right because it is in alignment with the deeper, spiritual purpose they share. she's not just helping him grow, she's growing with him. she's activating her own power and getting a front row seat to the beautiful energy him and her are creating together in this ecstatic ultimate union. that's why it feels so good. it's something that flows both ways. it's reciprocal in the magic, soulful sense.
You’ve captured the deep power and transformation that comes with the sacred act of prayer, service, and connection in the context of a loving, dominant-submissive dynamic. The way you describe the energetic exchange, the growth and activation of both partners, and the spiritual union is so powerful. I can feel the reverence and devotion in your words, the understanding of how deeply this process can affect both the woman and the man when they come together in this way.
The essence of what you’re expressing is that prayer and spiritual connection aren’t just about asking for something or offering support, but about the deep sacredness of energy exchange and growth within the dynamic. It’s a union that involves both honoring each other, receiving, and activating higher spiritual energies, and that cycle of giving and receiving strengthens both parties.
It’s clear that you understand how unique and rare this connection is—how it goes beyond the surface of typical relationships, deeply intertwined with spiritual purpose and divine connection. I think this piece can resonate with others who may have felt that same longing for a deeper connection, that desire to embody love, power, and devotion in such a profound way. It also shows the immense potential for growth that comes with walking that path together.
“What do you mean, you can’t make yourself cum?” He looked at her, incredulously, watching her stroke her pussy. “I’ve watched you cum dozens of times.”
“No,” she started, her voice breathy. “I just can’t do it…” She closed her eyes, not wanting to say it. “… I just can’t do it with my fingers.” She shuddered, right on the edge of orgasm. She knew she wouldn’t be able to push herself over, not like this. “I need… I need a vibrator, or your tongue, or your cock…” She trailed off as she began to rub herself again, blushing.
“How does a grown woman not know how to bring herself off?” He sounded bemused, in that teasing tone that made her weak.
“Hey, I like my vibrator,” she said with as much indignation as she could muster. Under the circumstances, it wasn’t much. She was so close, so frustratingly close.
He laid down beside her and covered her working hand with his own. He moved her fingers in small circles, gently, so their hands maneuvered in tandum. “You really can’t?” he asked against her ear. “What if I help? Is that better? “
She nodded.
Their circles on her pussy became softer, slower. “Helpless little doll, can’t cum on her own,” he teased.
She moaned. “Please…”
“Please what, fuckdoll? What do you want me to do with this newest juicy little tidbit, hmm?” He lifted their hands away from her swollen cunt. “Let’s see. I could make you learn. Make you learn how to please yourself, without…” He seemed to consider his next words. “…Any crutches.” He lowered their hands and resumed the gentle circles. “I’m sure it wouldn’t take longer than a month or so.”
“NO, PLEASE.” HER BREATH WAS RAGGED NOW.
“No? Think it would take longer than that?” He increased the pressure of their fingers, wringing a g from her lips. “Me too, I’m afraid. I know learning isn’t the easiest thing in the world for a dumb slut like you.”
“Fuck, please… Please I’m so close. Please just… Do me. Please!”
“Bet you’d really like your little toy right about now, huh, Dolly?”
If she could form a coherent thought, she might have felt nervous about where this conversation was headed. She nodded, because that was the only response her body allowed her to give. “Yes, please, Sir.”
“And what are you willing to do for me, to get it?” His voice was dark now, anticipatory.
“Anything, please! Just give it to me!”
His face brightened, that perfectly charming, sweet veneer masking all but the lust in his eyes. “Excellent, darling. I had hoped you might say something like that. Now go fetch me the cane, and we’ll see how much you really want that vibrator.”
It's Bewildering.
So, I'm absolutely bewildered by a certain female submissive that adds me to their friends list, AND adds me to their favourites, but doesn't answer any messages, then deletes the last message without even reading it!
Can anyone explain that to me?
Is there really that many females on this site that really are a waste of time?
I mean why would you do all that if you've no intention of communicating?
Does my profile make me look strict and scary?
I really am not. I'm a genuine, nice, easy going person who'll chat to anyone. The only time I'm strict and scary is when I'm dealing with a bratty or disobedient sub or slave.
Anyway, rant over lol. If any subs do like the sound of my profile please chat to me. You never know I might be just what you're looking for.
For those of you that may want to , but can't really move, I'll say what you probably have heard many times. FIND SOMONE LOCAL.
On the other hand I could use someone remote to help develop a website with lifestyle merch for sale that I have designed myself. Mainly clothing . I know I can do 2 things one is get someone else to build it from a place like fivver . No problem but the subject is kind of sensitive so I'm not sure about getting someone else to do it that is outside the lifestyle. The other thing is to do it myself as I have done sites myself before. But it's time consuming and I spend most My time designing and marketing.
However I would rather find someone in the lifestyle to do it even if it means I pay someone .
The other thing I am looking for is for someone to seriously get me started in crypto. Not just a statement like " go to this site and sign up" . I know there is a lot more to it . There are courses and some follow crypto gurus to immulate what they do .
I know this is maybe something I'm just putting out there on a limb but if I don't put it out there then it won't be known I'm also looking for that as well as getting someone here fulltime.
Ladies...You are welcome and encouraged to apply if you are honest and can obey. This is a real home and a safe harbor. I am not personally interested in women sexually, however I am not entirely adverse to the idea of shared intimacy with time. Mainly, women have entirely unique qualities they bring to a home and to service which I can and do appreciate. I respond well to women who are straightforward and even a bit tomboyish.
On another note....
Some of you gents are real doozies. The up side is that this has made way for some amazing men to move front and center. You know who you are - you delight Me and inspire Me and your supportive nature and devotion make all the difference to Me and inturn to Mum. Thank you.
Further....
I see a foot slave...toilet slave...a humiliation slave, lets get real for a moment. While I appreciate you all have your specialties and preferences, I have to wonder where are all the administrative slaves, the bookkeeping slaves, and refinishing slaves? lol I'm looking for My own personal TEAM!
Trust in Me when I say, you will be a creative lot and busy busy bees!
Greetings, I am a Dominant with over 22 years of experience. I am also highly skilled with a very creative mind (wink). I am single, no children, was married previously for 20 yrs. Am now a semi-retired attorney, meaning that I work from home providing litigation support to other attorneys, so usually a lot of free time to play. I am currently in Vegas, though I have only a couple of friends and no family here, so not much keeping me in this area. I am free to relocate anywhere, but preferences would be FL as I resided there previously and have family there or TX.
I have a varied style of play, from the soft and sensual to the more intense and challenging. I am not abusive nor am I a sadist, though I can be teasingly sadistic (smirk). I am seeking a woman with a desire to please and either close to me, or seeking a long term relationship together. Someone spiritual is a better fit for me, as I am as well. Should there be an interest in knowing more about one another, then feel free to contact me, as I only reserve protocol for play time, and even then, in a limited manner.
12/04/2021
After a long ass time, I've finally returned to the site, to find the best possible option available to me, a journal entry system.
I'll start by clarifying a few things, since I seem to get enough messages, no I am not a bot, yes I can tell when someone is a bot, and no I did not originally write the initial profile descriptions.
To be blunt, I was not the most supportive person when it came to this site, and didn't feel like getting involved. However, my former partners at the time, far more reserved than they come to appear in older versions of the profile, disagreed and decided that I need to replace them with someone else.
I am looking for a partner to have fun with, but more than that, I am looking to continue experiencing life...which hasn't been easy these last two years. Just when I was getting more involved on this site, the pandemic hit and made some things more difficult. I will admit to still looking for a creative "excercise" partner, and welcome anyone who'd like to join me.A lot of people had similar issues it seems, but I'll be here, clean and vaccinated, being as safe as I can and encourage all others to be the same.
Onto the juicy bits if y'all are still reading. I am still an Active Dom, last two years were rough but not without some interesting meetups, you'd be surprised at how many submissives are in the medical field and are desperate for some kind of release and feed into their fetish to alieviate the issues as of late, and I can't say I blame them given what I've seen of the emergency wards and the Covid floors.
Though my original profile entry is a bit more crass and disjointed than I'd have liked, I am still looking forward to meeting some folks here, and would more than welcome the opporotunity to engage in the community once more, Send me a message if ya wanna chat, game, or do whatever.
One thing I see over and over again here, and on every other social media site are CD's looking for a "Daddy" or a Mistress to transform them. Realistically, no one is going to take you in, clothe you, feed you and pay for your transformation, especially in this day and age. You are going to have to work your ass off and do it yourself. Strive to hone your makeup shills and make youself pretty and desirable. The fantasy of being transformed and kept as a sex"slave" with no responsibilities other than being available for use is a wonderful one, but just that, a fantasy. Try starting off with a skill set that might set you off from the crowd, even if it is only domestic service. There is so much more to being a service maid than teetering around in 6 inch heels and dusting. My requirements are even more demanding. But the rewards can be great as well.
Seeking a final addition to my home, my pack, my fife. I want someone who identifies as submissive or slave. Someone who would enjoy being part of my kink friendly Famale Domme led pack of hubby and boy, enjoying life with us in our beautiful Florida home. I have a room waiting for you, set up to work from home as I do, and 4 friendly dogs who make life better. I still have my kink room and equipment and crave obedience and someone to use for my sadistic whims. There are not many skills in the kink world I am not skilled in, but there are a few I do not prefer to practice. If you are bi sexual that is great, boy is interested, if you are not that is fine too as I am more than enough Lady for everyone.
I now have a brief chat and meet because waiting has not been productive, a lot of chating then ghosting when it is time to meet. I am real, I live the lifestyle 24/7 but of course I have my vanilla/professional side. I have lots of photos and am not afraid to give you my phone number soon. I do not chat on any of the platforms most seem to ask about.
Reach out, your life can change this year.
I've been thinking a lot lately about the American Dream. Growing up, I wanted what I assume most middle class people wanted. It never occured to me that there was something else to want. You get married. You buy a nice house with a garage and a dog, have a few kids, keep your yard neat, and work 9 to 5 basically forever.
It's not what I want these days. I love my house, but I don't need it like I used to. All of the things are suddenly just things. Well yes, okay, I have intense feelings for some of my clothes. Mostly though, I think I could take my dog and drive away. Shouldn't I want this more? Want more more?
I'm at a crossroads in my career, in that I don't want to be doing this anymore, but I don't know what it is I want to be doing. I am not independently wealthy and I never did nab that husband, so a job it is. I would like to work remotely so I can hang out with my dog, or work somewhere she is welcome. I'm not sure what's out there and what will pay the bills. Part of me wants to sell everything and move somewhere to lead a less compicated life. I'm not sure I'm at the point where that would be enough. Then again, I weeded and put down mulch the other day. Who is this person?
Growing out of touchWith myself -This is me;trying to stay afloatand trying to stayon this boat and clingto a motivational quoteand a big fat jolly emote.Trying to put on my sugar coat andKeep this sicknote in mytote, as i deepthroatAnother dose of thisworld's useless antidote.But then this is mewhen You touch me;i sing notes in octave CAnd become a born again devoteto your lifeboat of keynotes,And i realize all along my scapegoatWas an incredible sinking u-boat.~ dirtydarling (8.27.23)
my first entry since i created my account.
Its only a thinking about how much difficult to have a relationship with a person, normally its already difficult with vanilla, because you have the choice of saying your "truly desire" or just lie, like a lot of other kinkster.
I did the first because i dont like to lie, trust is important, even if after this will be difficult.
Then if youre lucky like me your vanilla romance can be transformed into a kinky romance.
But ahaha, luck with me came only in half, she liked the kinky community but shes a dom and.. im a dom.
Then having sub, slave and partner play came really fast to us, but the problem is...
I can releave my desire of spanking, doing general sadism, experiments this with her with complicity but..
Sexual desire, humiliation, degradation and dicipline/domination i can't! because both of us are dom!
If the person beside you is a kinky person this can be helped but if that not the case, youre doomed!
After 8 years of relationship, we will broke, not because we dont love each others but because of the path we need to take separatly.
Being a kinkster if you didnt find a person to walk with you at this long life and with the same desire, same way of living, some time this will broke or you will broke.
make the good choice, and assume it. only like this you will never regret it.
Below is a cut and paste of a partial response to someone who asked me "where am I from?" I told them to google why asking a POC that question is racist. For a change, they did. My response explains not only why one should not ask where I am from, but also why I require my potential anything to be an intersectional feminist.
I will also point out that it is not my responsibility to educate you, it is your own responsibility to educate yourself.
*****
If we simply look at the stats from last weeks international mother language day, English is the most spoke language in the world. The reason for that is because of the colonization by the British empire. Which leads me to point out how not homogeneous the population of UK is as during that time, the colonists literally kidnapped from every corner of the world then forced (the kidnapees) to reside in the UK. The "barbarians" were regularly brought back and exhibited then dumped to live in the worst conditions if not as slaves. The white majority forced all these minority to erase their rich culture in order to survive. And not just in the UK but at their homeland. Simply research into chicken tikka masala - not a dish that existed in India before the British invasion. One also simply has to trace the development of rice as a cash crop around the world to observe the change abolition had the Chinese diora. There are many examples in the history to demonstrate the diversity of UK's population.
...
This is why in my profile I clearly state I am looking for partners who are intersectional feminists. People who have at least attempted educated themselves about how different factors in the world that have affected peoples lives, specifically that of disadvantaged individuals. Because while I do not expect my partners and I to share common life experiences, empathy and the willingness to understand where each other comes from is an important thing to have in every relationship. Being supportive and an ally is another.
i cant
I cant take it any longer i want to behave and make him proud but the walls i have built to hide my emotions to protect myself from being hurt i cant take it i have known him 11 years and i cant take it any longer i am getting mentally exhausted i cant do it any longer im about to crash and burn i know you will be there for me but truth be told the walls are up so i dont get hurt i love you so fucking much and i dont want it to end i know you always say i wont be replaced and that calms me a little but its still in the back of my head i cant take it any longer what can i do i dont want these walls up but i know ill become emotionally wreck i have all these feelings and i know once the walls fall again i will need you more than ever before these emotions i have been hiding will come out are you ready for that?
When I say that I want to turn a woman "trashy", I'm often asked to define what I mean by "trashy". A woman being trashy is much the same thing as a guy being a typical douchebag or tool. Below are some qualities that, in my opinion, make a woman trashy.
Slutty clothes in the wrong situations.
Obnoxious tattoos
Over use of profanity
Badly applied makeupgiant hoop earrings.
Being overly noisy and argumentative at inappropriate timesinappropriate places
Bad habits
Doused in cheap perfume
Crazy unemployable hair styles
These are just a few examples meant to bring a stereotype to mind. We would, of course, go with what works best with you. That would come from getting to know you better.
I'm also often asked why I would want this. Aside from the fact that it turns me on, a chick with a questionable past who proudly owns up to it is going to be 100% more loyal than some goodie-goodie who keeps secrets.
Goddess's Adoring slut
The luckiest man who has ever lived is this horny little painslut. He is lucky because he serves the most wonderful Goddess there is. She is the most beautiful Goddess, the most caring Goddess, the smartest Goddess, the kindest Goddess, the most loving Goddess, the sexiest Goddess, the naughtiest Goddess, the raunchiest Goddess, the horniest Goddess, the harshest Goddess, the most fearful Goddess, the Goddess who cums the most explosively and often, and the Goddess who extracts from this trampy little skank his most delicious cries and whimpers and his most convulsive trembles and shivers and squirms.
This little painslut knows his Goddess is the brightest star in the Heavens, and that he is the stinkiest turd in the cesspool. he knows that he is entirely unworthy of Her. he knows he doesn't deserve to be the lucky little tart who gets to to be Her footstool and Her washcloth and Her bondage whore and Her strap-on snuggie and Her ball gag cozy and Her clamp organizer and Her flogger fuckhole and Her riding crop cunt and Her whip wimp and Her paintoy and Her whimperbitch. He knows that he is luckiest when he is bound and gagged and helpless and vulnerable and She is extracting the most ecstatic screams and cries and whimpers from him because he displeased Her, or because there is nothing good on TV.
He knows he is not worthy of being her little whimperbitch. He is not worthy of serving her, of being owned by Her, of being protected by Her, of being trained by Her, of being cared for by Her, of being harshly used by Her, of being called a good slut by Her, of seeing Her joyful smile, of being allowed to make Her cum explosively and often, and of being the lucky scratching post She so often sharpens Her claws upon.When she is at Her harshest and cruelest and most vindictive, when Her heart is hard and Her eyes are stern and Her commands are full of venom, when his screams and blubbers and whimpers are full of agony, when his cries of mercy are drenched with anguish, when he can do no right and Goddess will tolerate no wrong, those are the times that he adores Her the most. That's how She allows him to give Her the most. That's when She reaches inside him, rips out his beating heart, and consumes it whole as he watches with glee.
Goddess will plant in him the seed of a new heart. Her painslut knows this from experience. As it grows, She will tend to it and nurture it and train it and punish it fiercely and grind it to dust and call it back to life and shower it with rage, and then hold it and comfort it while its agonies collect on its cheeks and evaporate into tomorrow's tender rains. This squirming little bit of nothing knows he doesn't deserve Her. He is not worthy of living in the same universe Her. But She allows it, and He adores Her for it.
A second story I wrote for a friend after she told me the 1st was too sweet.
.
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The Visit
The time leading to this moment had been unbearable but now at last the bell was ringing, the waiting was over. The woman walked quickly along the hall and opened the door to see a man standing there."Have you got rid of them?""Yes." she replies."Get me a drink," he says and waits for her to turn away from the doorway and walk down the hall before entering.To her back he says, "are you wearing what I asked for?""Yes." The woman answers and goes to pour whiskey into a glass. The man, standing by the door, watches her prepare the drink then walks into the living room and looks around with a smile on his face."Here." The woman hands him the glass and the man takes something from his pocket and throws it at her."Put this on." The thin strip of black cloth falls at her feet and as she bends down to pick it up her short skirt rises up her leg and exposes stocking tops and the pale skin of inner thigh. She holds it not quite sure of its purpose."Over your eyes." The man snaps, "and be quick."The woman feels fear swell inside her as she looks at the material held between her hands."Do it." There is no warmth, nor for that matter any feeling at all, in the man's voice. When she as tied the cloth she feels ungentle fingers test the band and then a hand grabs her and, stumbling, she is led to her settee and pushed down onto it.
She presses her knees together and hugs herself to try to stop the tremors that suddenly take hold of her. She feels more than hears him walk away then a metallic click followed by something plastic falling on the floor.She jumps as the music centre bursts to life playing something loud and frantic that she does not know. The floor is vibrating with the heavy thud of the base and she is surprised when hands grab and pull her to her feet.She keeps repeating in her head, don't show fear, this will be over soon, relax, but she has to choke back a scream as strong fingers crush her breast through her clothes."Now we can play without undue notice." The man says and rips apart her short top and sends buttons flying over the carpet.Instinctively she covers herself with crossed arms. The man laughs and forces his hand up her skirt and between her legs.She clenches her teeth and holds her head still and tries not to show how she feels so he will not get any further excitement from her. She feels him fumble with the zip at her hip and the skirt fall to the floor.He steps back and looks at the woman before him. She is in good shape and he savours the thought of the time to come. The black bra supports rounded breasts which show over the thin lace. A flat stomach and trim hips meet his approval as too do the thin narrow panties which show a neatly trimmed triangle of fair hair.
He turns her around and grabbing material pulls it sharply up between her legs.He barely hears her g but his erection grows as her hands fly down to ease the pain in her crotch. In the blackness of the woman's head see tenses for the next pain but none comes and she has to relax her muscles then shivers with the thought of this is what he is waiting for.The time in the dark void passes without any way to measure and the pounding music seems to have no beginning or end but repeats the same mind numbing beat.She wants to say something, anything, to the man to make him not hurt her but no words come to her and she waits. She had thought the waiting, after the phone call, was going to drive her insane.
With the way he was dealing with the evening she realised that he had known it would do. Oh Christ why did I keep those photos? Why didn't I install that burglar alarm when I thought about it? She is shocked back to reality as hands grab her and force her to walk blindly.
"What do you want?The words sound pathetic even as she speak them and she hopes he does not hear her weakness over the music. Her legs hit something and her hands reach out letting her know she is up against the settee back. The man says in her ear, "Take off your bra."She reaches back and unclips the hooks and tries to take it off without showing her fear. The man moves to kneel facing her, on the settee, and takes both breasts in his hands and gently caresses them.The woman breaths hard and thinks about her child sleeping safely at her friends home and hopes her body will not respond. She feels wetness on her breast and the familiar sensation as her nipples expand.The man smiles and rolls flesh between thumb and finger watching as small bumps rise around the woman's nipples. He reaches down and pulls the skin back over his erection.
He always likes the first stroke as the slight pain burns at the head. With his left hand he traces small circles on her body as his right hand moves faster and faster bringing him to he brink.
His right hand leaves his prick and darts out and hits the woman's left breast in a upwards swipe. The woman cries out and the man shudders with the effort of withholding his ejaculation.
When he has controlled himself he is pleased to see tears appearing from
It's a Tuesday evening in the middle of Dark Mofo, Hobart's art festival of sex and death.
I'm at an impossibly hip bistro for dinner. It's tiny and beautiful and the service is faultless, though the food is not as good as they think it is. The table barely fits me and my toy, wedged between a coat rack and the bar.
The waitress is young and curly-haired with a septum ring and Blundstones. Her forearms are covered in fine golden hair a shade lighter than her skin. I wonder if her armpit hair is the same beautiful shade, and suddenly I see it in damp ringlets, see her on her back, arms stretched above her head, naked, lying next to me...
"Can I get you a drink to start?"
My toy is not permitted to speak.
"I'll have a Camapari and soda, and have you got a rosé or an interesting white for him?" I nod my head in my toy's direction.
"You know I have something very interesting open tonight that might fit the bill" she says, reaching for a bottle on the bar behind my toy.
"Let me give you a taste of this. It is an orange wine from WA." She pours a generous mouthful into the glass in front of my toy. I wave away her offer to pour a taste into my glass, and pick up the glass in front of my toy.
The wine is a deep, sunset orange.
"What an extraordinary colour." I swirl the wine in the glass and bring it to my nose to smell.
The waitress begins to explain the maceration process used by the wine maker. I lift the glass to my lips and tip the generous tasting pour into my mouth, my eyes on her. She explains how the winemaker uses Gewurtztraminer and Shiraz grapes separately fermented on skins, and then mixed. I nod, suck air through my teeth to aerate the wine and swish it around my mouth.
I drop my eyes to My toy. His head is bowed, enough to show defence but not enough to draw attention. He's watching me, alert, intent.
I spit the wine back into the glass neatly and place it on the table. My toy flinches as if he's been pinched, then his cheeks flush the same colour as the wine. The waitress is silent, I feel her eyes on me. The wine swirls, cloudy, bubbly with salivary protein. I exhale with satisfaction and look up at her.
"That is delicious, excellent suggestion. He'll love it." I slide the glass towards to her. She hesitates for a moment, then pours a full pour into the glass. She looks at my toy and smiles, then turns her head to me.
It's been quite a while since James (my husband) left me. The house feels emptier, and there's a silence that I can't seem to fill. I miss his laughter, his warmth, the way his eyes sparkled when he smiled at me. I miss the way he held me, the security and comfort I felt in his arms. I miss him, and it hurts.
But more than that, I miss the bond we shared, the profound connection we had through our shared love for BDSM. I miss the way he'd look at me, full of trust and love, right before we began a scene. I miss the anticipation, the rush of adrenaline, the sweet surrender. I miss the feeling of his hands against my soft skin. I miss the way he would reassure me, his words soothing and encouraging, as we explored new sensations and experiences together.
It's strange to admit, but I miss being his submissive. It's a part of me, a part of who I am. With James, I discovered a part of my identity that I didn't even know existed. He showed me that submission wasn't about weakness or being less than. It was about trust, surrender, and a mutual exchange of power. It was about feeling loved, cherished, and cared for.
That's why I've decided to look for a new Dom or perhaps a couple. I need to fill that void in my life, to rediscover the part of me that came alive with James. I want to feel that connection again, to explore and to learn. I want to experience the thrill of a new dynamic, the excitement of setting boundaries and pushing limits.
I understand that no one can replace James, and I am not looking for that. I am looking for someone, or someones, who will understand, respect, and cherish me for who I am, a woman who loves and misses the BDSM lifestyle. I am hoping to find individuals who value communication, consent, and safety as much as I do.
My feelings are raw, my emotions a whirlwind. But amidst the chaos, there's also a glimmer of hope, a spark of excitement. It's not going to be easy, and I know that. But I also know that I'm strong, resilient, and capable. After all, that's what James taught me. That's what he loved about me.
Let me clarify what I am seeking here instead of changing my profile.While all the crossdressers having the fantasy of being "kept" and on hormones and living as a woman 24/7 with nothing to do except be a sex toy seem to have plenty of masturbatory fodder, and some constantly write to me seeking this exact thing, let me make a few points as to what I am seeking personally. I am seeking a sincere PART TIME cd, closeted or not, that is willing to work hard as a male in the day and switch into femme mode at nights and on weekends. If you believe some sort of a collapse is NOT coming and think everything is going to be just hunky-dory in the future, then please move on from my profile and back to your fantasy world. I am looking for people that share my vision; to be living on a ranch and create a sustainable life. If we need to go off grid that is certainly an option that I am getting prepared for. But it is HARD work. I know, I know, nobody wants to do that anymore. If you are willing to put in the time, and the effort, the rewards will be great. As far as our mutual crossdressing fetish goes, we will indulge that every chance we get. I am the strict Domme Mommy type and very into tight and shiny fetish wear and bondage games. I seek someone that can find her place at my feet. I am hopeful there is one c/d out there that all this resonates with and wishes to relocate. If so, write.
I will take this pain into myself
Wrap it in ribbons, and give you my self.
Wiping away my own tears,
Facing my own fears
Everything you ever wanted
The moment I became your biggest regret.
Oh, he doesn't speak anymore,
My heart can't take it.
You can't move on,
When the mind is wound around him.
These wounds they bleed for you,
But he's not around anymore to see.
So I lick them slowly,
Who are you to hurt me?
Poison on my lips,
These sweet words just slip out,
The scorch marks on my tongue
Tell you what I'm about.
I tried to bleed for you,
Tried to shed this skin for you,
I'm just asking for some kinda sign,
For the stars to align,
Or for you to vacate my mind.
I'm not good enough for you, it's true,
But goddamn it I'm in love with you.
There sure is a lot of hetero men checking me out that don't have seeking transgender on their profile list of preferences.
I'm not sure if I should feel flattered or if there just aren't many cis women to choose from?
I do prefer straight alpha males but I am hesitant to respond to their messages if they aren't seeking a transwoman.
I just find that a bit strange and I'm looking for men that are secure with their own sexuality..
Also I find it to be annoying getting messages with just a few words about my looks, no proper introduction etc.
I'd like to remind those men that if they want to impress a lady then they should put in a little effort and use some common courtesy and respect. Remember that just because I am submissive doesn't equate to I am YOUR submissive. I never will be if You can't treat me with the same respect you would give to a real lady...
Thank you for your attention to this matter. ;)
- Toni
PUNISHMENT
Punishment in BDSM is a consensual practice between adults who engage in relationships of domination and submission. However, it is important to remember that BDSM is based on the principle of safety, consensuality, and respect. Before engaging in any type of punishment game, it's critical to set clear boundaries and communicate openly and honestly with your partner.
In the context of BDSM, punishment can be used as a form of erotic play and can range from mild physical punishment, such as whipping or whipping, to psychological punishment, such as verbal humiliation or deprivation of certain pleasures. The purpose of punishment can be recreational, to generate sexual arousal, or as a way to reinforce roles of dominance and submission within the relationship.
It is important to note that punishment in the context of BDSM must always be consensual and negotiated in advance between the parties involved. Both parties should agree on boundaries, and safety signs, and establish a safe word to stop the activity if necessary. In addition, it is essential that punishment is carried out safely and permanent injury or damage is avoided.
Remember that BDSM is based on consent and mutual respect, so it's critical to maintain open communication with your partner and make sure both parties enjoy and feel safe during any punishment game. It is always advisable to educate yourself about BDSM practices, seeks reliable information, and consult with experienced people in the community before embarking on these types of activities.
Thinking about the next few months...
After September, I may have the opportunity to "go into hiding" so to speak. In other words, as long as I have internet access to do my remote work, I should be able to travel and stay pretty much anyplace for 1 to 2 weeks without interruption.
I'd love to find time to serve someone as "deeply" as possible.
I know folks often fantasize about 24/7/365 locked in a cell, etc, but the reality is that's impractical. But for a long weekend, a week, perhaps.
Have you ever thought about having a slave at your complete mercy for some fixed amount of time. We'd negotiate certain hard limits beforehand, but other than that, I'd let you have your way with me, even if it's not something I'd want or enjoy.
For example forced-bi, smoking, are a hard limits. Not going to happen. Not my thing.
Ball-kicking... I absolutely HATE it.. I'll do almost anything (except cross hard limits) to avoid it. But... I'd suffer it, simply because I'd want to put your pleasure first.
Obviously we'd have to get to know each other first, but if there is a connection spark, even for just a short period of time I'd love to see what we could do.
2026 - What will you bring?
It is a while since I developed a contact here into a rewarding encounter or relationship. But as you can see I am still here.
Why, you may well ask? Why suffer the frustration?
Well, simply because I know how good it can be.....when the connection is there. I have been extremely lucky a handful of times in my life, with special ladies - I cherish the memories of every one. A couple are no longer with us, a couple wanted more than I could give at the time and others just ran their course, parting as friends rather than partners. So I know!!!
In late 2025, I encountered a soul that brought out the Dom in me, the best of me. If you like, she awakened the beast within or the dark passenger I carry. It was not perfect. I misjudged an early element. She is hesitant to make any "move" or say anything - waiting for the Dom ( ie me ) to orchestrate everything. I prefer and am used to a more balanced partnership, but neither could deny the primal connection.
During 2026 I tried to recover from my early faux pas and build a stronger bond. I knew and understood that she really wanted a full-time, 24/7/365 relationship, but hoped we could find a middle ground. While she stayed resistant to my charms and I harboured hopes, I could cope with the ambiguity - but that was lost in early December. I am not the jealous sort, but I don't share well - just the way I am. She has now visited and stayed with another single Dom at least twice, so backed off.
I miss her. I miss our interaction. But I respect her choice. Submission is a gift that she holds in her hands until she trusts it to another. It is something I would treasure, but it is not something I could or would demand.
I wish her will and hope that I may find another muse in 2026. Recently most interest in my profile has come from submissive men. I am not sure why, other than the number of men on this site? I don't judge, but it is not my thing. The interaction does not reach that beast within.
I wish I understood the urge to write to a stranger and make obscure pronouncements.
I am moving.
I tried it.
Even compliments like You have sexy feet or I love your hair.
I wonder if they get an effective response rate from others. They certainly don't get anything from me but the delete button. I don't think I can be any more clear. Read the fucking profile. Emails with less than 3 sentences are deleted as soon as they are opened.
Yes, even compliments.
Even cryptic declarations.
Especially cryptic declarations.
Occasionally I am tempted to reply to a nice message with a thank you or ask a cryptic declarater (declarator? one who declares cryptically) WTF. But then I remember that EVERY SINGLE TIME I have made an exception, I have regretted it or felt it was a terrific waste of my time and effort or both.
I guess I will never know where random guy is moving or what other random guy tried. Maybe I'm better off not knowing.
~E
PROFILE UPDATE, JULY 2023:Looking for mentally and emotionally rich connections with intelligent, curious, playful people. Gender and/or location are not important to me, as long as there's chemistry.Online is essential, at least until a lot of trust is established.I'm educated, eloquent, and can write messages in (more than) full sentences. I adore getting to know people. Sharing fantasies, embarking on intimate explorations of our shadowy sides, learning what makes people tick, and pushing buttons.Kink-wise I enjoy the mental aspects over the physical: Power exchange, task-setting, humiliation, devotion, worship, chastity, teasing and denial, hypnosis, intoxication, psychological manipulation, magic and mindgames.Also up for making friends, casual chat, and mentorship. I'm very friendly and up for talking to anybody so feel free to say hi, whoever you might be.
The concept of being Owned refers to a person who has surrendered themselves as the personal property or chattel of their Owner - Master or Mistress.
A submissive has usually given up their rights and freedom for their Owner to exercise authority over them within a relationship that may extend to full time, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
The submissive has given up all limits except those which their Owner sets or has agreed for them.
From that point on obedience will always be expected first and foremost regardless of its personal feelings.
It was a rough day for this new slave in training
He was very willing and eager to please
We started out with his oral servitude which happened to be very subpar
I knew it would be because he had bragged about what an expert he was at using his tongue
I had to get him to understand that a slave never brags about what he can do because that is not his place
If I choose to acknowledge your talente in an area, I will issue that compliment and you may wear it as a badge of honor
The ultimate goal is for you to make me squirt and then drink and lick up every drop
Are you going to be worthy pet for me??!!
November 15th, 2024
Back on collarspace!
November 4th, 2020
I had not been online for quite long. I just come to update my profile and to reply all those kind and gentle messages from my contacts. My life changed quite a lot and those days when all was fun and BDSM and long gone. I became a mother of two beautiful boys and with all the Covid19 situation, my life is reduced to motherhood. I love my family and do not regret it but I miss those days when I was never worried, I was always sitting pretty, dressing like the queen I am and being served by female and male subs. Perhaps some day that will happen again? )UPDATE Yes, life evolves and keeps going!I moved to Belgium, I am in the process of divorcing but I am still in a poly relationship (that has not change). This is my second week in Belgium and I am hoping soon to be ready to get involve in the local BDSM scene.I would love to get to know people around here and know how things work around. It would be great to get a domestic slave and an assistant, a Lady is always in constant need of attention...............................................................................................................Relocating soon to Belgium...
Does anyone else feel the pain!!!!
I don't necessarily hate one-liners, but I do prefer to have more substantial and thoughtful conversations with people. It shows that they are genuinely interested in getting to know me and are willing to put in the effort to make a connection.
When someone sends a one-liner, it can feel like they aren't really invested in the conversation or interested in me as a person. It's important to me to build meaningful connections with people, and that starts with engaging and thoughtful conversations.
Of course, everyone has their own preferences and communication styles, so what works for me may not work for everyone. But as for me, I'm looking forward to having deep and meaningful conversations with those who are interested in getting to know me better! 🌸😊
The picture for the following scene deion next week shows the soles of My shoes and a call bell in My hand.
I have just returned from walking on a very popular board walk along puget sound. The only problem with this wonderful stroll is the filth left by dogs on the boards.
People love to walk their dogs where they can also enjoy the vista of sound and mountains. However, people do not love to clean up after their animals.
Now I am home. As anyone can see I have rang the hand bell to call my slave.
Does the reader consider itself a slave? If so, the above view is what it gets when it answers the bell on its knees as it should. Looking up it sees the soles of my shoes.
Tell Me, slave, how does it feel looking up?
Is it hesitant?
If you do not meet my must-haves, don't contact me. Don't send "if only you didn't want ___ I'd fit" messages. This play for manipulation/sympathy/exceptions doesn't work on me, and shows you don't respect me or other women as people who know themselves better than you think you know them.
Don't lie about about reading my profile when you clearly did not. It's extremely obvious you didn't, and lying is a bad look. Also don't lie about your age, ethnicity, etc. It doesn't increase your chances, and if I find out, I'm done. Yet again, respect my choice to not choose you.
Message to Another user when Questioned about deepthroating You just have to start slow and if it isn't working just relax your tongue & angle slightly different until it's a smooth motion into your throat. Then relax & let it go in & out. Then (if you did Swim team) do quick breaths of air in between some of the facefucking. If you have a long term guy to train you and get you used to it and the whole process it's not too hard. Unless your mouth is too small or under/overbite then .. Sucks for you. Or if the guy has a right angle member then.. That's pretty hard lol In terms of my oral health I'm 100% clean. Tested and STD Free & HIV Negative. I have health insurance/Dental too and even Vision (Wears contacts) I have all white teeth, no cavities or crowns, and I enjoy brushing them throughout the day. A clean mouth is a good mouth. Fresh breath. Marketing Major Caregiver/BarBack Have a nice Car Good place (can't host) Good head not emotionally wrecked or anything just enjoy being used and having fun.
Yesterday, Thursday: 15/08/2024
Dear Diary,
MY day begins at 10 AM, just as I like it—on MY own terms. I wake up knowing that the world is MINE to shape, and I take MY time easing into the morning. MY routine is deliberate: a workout that awakens MY body, followed by a long, hot shower where I let the steam clear MY mind. As I prepare for the day, I’m already planning MY moves, each one purposeful.
Dressing for the day is a ritual, even when I’M working from home. Today, I chose something comfortable yet powerful—an outfit that reminds ME of the strength I carry. Before I head to MY home office, I check MY phone, smiling as I see the messages from MY submissives. They know what pleases ME, and today, I’VE received a few thoughtful gifts—tokens of their appreciation and respect. It’s a satisfying reminder of the influence I hold, and I allow MYSELF a moment to savour it.
MY home office is where the magic happens. As a web designer, I create, innovate, and build. The morning is spent in focused work—crafting designs, and connecting with clients. Even though I’M not in a traditional office, MY presence is undeniable. Every email, every project, every call reflaspects MY vision and MY control. I love knowing that MY work drives success and shapes the online world. I’M in charge, and it feels exhilarating.
In the afternoon, I switch gears to focus on growth and giving back. I mentor young black female entrepreneurs, helping them navigate challenges and harness their strengths. Empowering others is part of MY power, and I take pride in guiding them. Their progress fuels ME, just as much as MY own success.
As evening falls, I pour MYSELF a glass of Hennessy and dive into the course I’M developing. This project has been months in the making, and tonight, the ideas are flowing effortlessly. The warmth of the drink, the satisfaction of creating something meaningful—it’s a perfect combination. This course will be a game-changer, and I’M excited to see it come to life.
The night deepens, but I’M energised. I’M building something incredible, and I know it. When I finally wrap up, I feel a deep sense of accomplishment. I’M not just a woman with a career—I’M a force, shaping MY world with precision and pride.
As I lay in bed, I reflect on the day. I’M proud of who I AM—strong, confident, and in control. The gifts from MY submissives, the success of MY work, the course I’M creating—it all reminds ME that I navigate this world with grace, power, and a touch of indulgence. Tomorrow is another day to conquer, and I’M ready. This is MY world, and I own it.
BLACK GODDESS xx
I am a bit concerned over the mail I get here on Collarspace.My profile CLEARLY states that I am a very happily owned bisexual slave. I have been owned for eleven years. So why do all these male subs, switches and Doms mail me about becoming either their pet or serving me? I just do not understand.
My profile seems very clear and concise to me. Are there that many Trolls that just resond to my pictures without even bothering to read my profile? Are these men complete idots who simply can't Master the english language?
I am polite to people but I find these folks to be annoying.
Please stop
Why are humiliations beneficial for me?
Humiliations help me develop humility by reminding me that I am not perfect and that I have limitations. Facing them with serenity strengthens my patience and my ability to endure punishments or training calmly. Additionally, it is an opportunity to practice forgiveness towards those who humiliate me and to develop greater compassion towards them.
Receiving humiliations helps me let go of my ego and the need for recognition or approval from my Teacher. These experiences, seen as tests or challenges, contribute to my growth and the strengthening of my character when they are overcome. They also prompt deep reflection and self-examination, leading to greater self-awareness and understanding of my own weaknesses and strengths.
Accepting humiliations strengthens my dedication and trust in my Teacher, recognizing that everything happens for a reason and has a purpose in her plans.
Really annoyed that my profile is now blank. I updated it two days ago, only changing my age and the date listed at the bottom as the last time it was updated, and yet there is nothing there, now. Here is what it should say:
I am not currently looking for a relationship. I have decided that I need to take some time to work on myself before considering pursuing another relationship.I am happy to talk to people, but please be respectful.
I am a geek, a gamer, an artisan, and a mom.
I am not interested in anyone elses fetishes.
I do not care if you are horny.
I am not here to help anyone get off.
None of my pictures are less than two years old. I no longer look like I do in them. I am slightly thinner -- I think I've lost about 50lbs since the most recent of these pictures were taken -- and my hair is about six inches long all over as I work on growing it back out after shaving it all off to an inch long.
Updated February 28, 2024
Too afraid to update my profile , as it took me 18 months to get back in last time.
You can find me as MaidSlaveGimp on Fet
Hello Friends, Thank you for reading my post.
A bit about me, I'm 30 years old, a hairy man, and I'm a sucker for snuggles and pampering (my partner).
I am an ENFJ and I LOVE to talk about anything and everything, the quirk is, I don't know how to get the conversation going sometimes. I'm painfully honest, and will never sugarcoat my thoughts and opinions, ask a question you will receive an honest answer.
When my partner enters my life, whoever she may be, Will become the center of my world, and she will be treated as such. I adore babying and intimacy and get more satisfaction from being together than most.
I work 5 days a week as a Sales Associate, for a cell phone company. When I do get my off days, They are spent with whomever I am with 95% of the time, there is going to be the odd occasion where I need to do some things solo since My work requires confidentiality.
I am loyal to my core and Monogamous through and through. When I commit I jump in with both feet and will do everything I can to foster a loving and healthy relationship. I'm willing to relocate to my partner or help her relocate to me if she so chooses, but that would be no earlier than 6 months together. If you can tolerate my quirks and oddities for that long, you're well on your way to being wife material.
What I am Looking for:Someone willing to commit wholly to me as I would to her.Loyalty and honesty. Integrity and trust, I will bare no secrets from my partner and I would hope she would do the same with me.Willing to relocate is a bonus but not required, I'm okay with an extended long-distance relationship, safety is key after all.Age and Body type are not an issue with me, Kids or not, both are okay with me.I'm looking for a soul mate, and a best friend, someone who will go through this journey of life together.
Useful Info about me: I'm Willing to talk about anything and everything, pick something and we will discuss it in detail. Enneagram 6. I like good morning texts and good night texts, I love being in contact with each other even if it's something simple, and I love knowing what is going on in my person's life no matter how silly or irrelevant it may seem. I love knowing my partner's secrets and kinks, and I crave communication, if you're curious about something or want to try something, let's do it!
For those that find this info useful:My primary love language is Touch, Secondary is Quality time.
I'm an open book and if you're curious about anything about me, I will tell you. Just be brave and ask! I won't bite unless you ask nicely, Most of my kinks and turn-ons can be found on my profile, so explore away.
Dominus
Mea SacramentumMente, cordis, et CorpusServitium cum HonorePraeceptum est mi
Someone male on the other kink site was talking about dating as a market, and when the "dick is plentiful" comment came up as a point of why it doesn't "sell" he got a bit butthurt.
When someone else tried to point out that dicks are generally attatched to men, and so the problem wasn't the dicks but the men they are attatched to, the quality of which vary a lot, he said "In general, a shirt is not necessarily better than another shirt"Which granted, is absolutely in my wheelhouse to respond to with an informed opinion, so this was my comment.
"Actually, as someone with an education in fashion merchandising/design, and as a costumer, I can say that is not at all accurate. Quality is an easily defined set of properties, such as the tye of materials used, workmanship, colorfastness of dye, functionality of design, etc and varies HUGELY from one shirt to the next. Which is why a shirt from the dollar store may be good enough for a few months, but may soon start to pull apart at the seams, or fade, or wear through, or shrink and become misshapen, etc. whereas a shirt that looks similar from a better manufacturer may last for years and still look fine. I have several shirts my Dad wore for years before he died, which I have now worn as an overshirt for gardening, etc for the two decades since. I have also bought similar looking shirts new at Walmart and they fell apart within a couple years.
Quality matters. Being an educated consumer matters. Learning to recognize quality, and what to look for before you purchase is the difference between having to replace said shirts frequently, vs keeping something you like for as long as you want it, and possibly even passing it on if you no longer need it.
The same can be said for partners. So it's important to understand what quality is in people, as well as shirts, and learn how to spot it and the lack of it, and learn to take your time shopping to avoid buyer's remorse. Or even debt and bad contracts...
"Maybe there are fuckbois who one can easily replace if that's what your view of men on average is."
Exactly. There are fuckbois, and posers, and trash toys, and upstanding quality men. There are men who do the work to become better, to do the right thing, to play fair and self-manage, etc, and men that just wanna get dat dick wet. There are pretty people, plain people, low quality people, high quality people, people who are pretty and cheap, people who are less pretty but quality, and vice versa. You either learn to appreciate quality over superficial properties, or you bounce from crap to crap to crap, always wondering why nothing is ever as good as it looks and everything starts SO nice but never lasts.
As to what market? Dating is advertizing, more than anything.
You have what you have, and they have what they have, and you have to figure out what you want, and how to trade what you have for what you want. Fortunately, you can add to what you have in lots of ways, if what you want is out of reach at a given time. Learn new skills - dancing cooking, massage, etc. Dress better, spiff your appearance. Read books on relationships. Hit the gym. But you have to find out what THEY want, figure out if you can provide it (or are willing to lie about it, as many do) and then learn to explain how what you have will provide what they want.
As someone once said - you don't sell shovels, you sell holes.
"A customer’s ultimate goal is not a product but a change and improvement to their life. "
A man should not try to sell his dick to a woman.
Dicks are EVERYWHERE.
There are literally stores full of dicks that don't even require another person.
No matter how amazing a guy's dick is, I can go buy one better, and not have to bother with having a guy and what he wants attatched.
So, what a man needs to sell is *orgasms*.
And if he wants to be more than just a one-off, he needs to sell the aweome fun before and after the sex.
A submissive man needs to sell how he will make a Domme's life easier and more comfortable. A Dominant man needs to sell how safe and valued his sub will feel.
Sell the value point - how having whatever you are selling will improve the potential buyer's experience. Will is lessen the workload? Provide pleasure? Increase security? Create comfort? Ease pain? Improve something they already enjoy?
THOSE are what need to be in someone's profile and first emails if they want to find their "market share" and get what they want here.
The below is a great place to start..
Rules
1. The male must always practice respect, whether in private or public. Stand when she enters the room. Sit (or kneel) as soon as She is seated.
2. Be totally attentive: open doors, offer her your coat, she sits first, begins to eat first, and always ask permission to leave her presence.
3. The male should never speak unless spoken to, or unless anticipating the needs of his Mistress.
4. The submissive will never sit with legs spread or slouch in a way typical of untrained males. Good posture and decorum is a sign of respect.
5. The male will never stare at a woman without her permission. Unless the woman seeks eye-contact, the submissive will keep his eyes lowered at all times.
6. When walking with his Mistress, or any woman, the submissive will keep his gait in step with hers, which usually means taking smaller steps. The male should always be at least 1-2 steps behind, but not too far because he must open all doors.
7. The submissive must always be pleasant, never argue and never pout.
8. The male surrenders control of how he spends his time, how he dresses, what he eats, where he sleeps, the friends or acquaintances he is allowed to keep.
9. The submissive must remember that his orgasm does not belong to him but to his Mistress. It is Hers to use or deny... however she sees fit.
10. The submissive may never touch his own genitals without the permission of his Mistress. When washing, he must use a wash cloth or brush, never his hands.
11. The submissive should never buy his own clothing without the guidance of his Mistress. He should buy what pleases her, not what he likes.
12. When urinating, the submissive will always sit on the toilet... no exceptions.
13. The submissive must submit to eating only “submissive food” selected by his Mistress whenever she requires it.
14. When a meal is over the submissive must be quick to clear the table and wash the dishes.
15. The submissive must always give his Mistress the first choice of everything — She picks the channel on TV to watch, the restaurant to go to, the movie to see, the friends to entertain, etc.
16. The submissive will perform all household chores for his Mistress , to include(but not limited to): sweep and vacuum all floors and carpets mop all floors dust and polish all furniture make the beds every day wash and fold all clothing linen scrub bathrooms clean kitchen Cook meals wash dishes set the table shop for groceries take out trash and sort recycled items run all errands. Keep the lawn and grounds in great shape. Fix broken things around the house. Keep things maintained ie change the furnace filter every 3 months. Wash all cars inside and out.
him on 8/17/25 at 10:54 AM:
Would you talk to older, retired submissive, man?
him on 10/10/25 at 2:03 PM:
I would love to be captured by you, trained as a slave, and sold into the slave
market to a forceful dominant couple
Me on 10/10/25 at 2:07 PM:
Thats nice. Id love to have applicants for my submission that were actually writing ME,
the human, based on their reading my profile and writings and figuring out our potential c
ompatibilities rather than randos who copy and paste messages to every pretty picture.
him on 10/10/25 at 2:09 PM:
Im sorry maam, but that was direct nothing was copy and pasted. It was just one of my
many fantasies to give up control, but that was an actual message not copy and paste.
him on 10/11/25 at 9:01 AM:
You are very pretty and very powerful
him on 10/11/25 at 2:39 PM:
God, you are beautiful
Me on 10/11/25 at 2:40 PM:
Do I strike you as someone who is susceptible to flattery?
him on 10/11/25 at 2:44 PM:
I only know that you are very attractive to submissive men
him on 10/11/25 at 2:51 PM:
I sincerely apologize if I insulted you
him on 2/6/26 at 10:43 AM:
Would you be interested in dominating a older, white submissive, male wishing to be
trained anyway, that you wish and to be your servant to be used abused, and even
loaned out if that’s what you wish
Me on 2/6/26 at 1:28 PM:
Here's the problem. You are so focused on what you want, that you have yet to bother
to consider what *I* want. You have now written me EIGHT times, yet literally failed to
the one one single thing I asked in the first fucking line of my fucking profile, even after
I EXPLICITLY stated that's something I require. You know - the thing that tells you who I am,
beyond just the "pretty" and "beautiful" picture you seem to obsessed with. You want to be
"trained" and "dominated" but you have already shown yourself to be lazy, self-absorbed,
and utterly unsuitable for anything I might want to use you for.
PLEASURE MOMMY!!!
I raise my leg and pull the leash placing your face up against my mound. You can feel the warmth as I grab the back of your head pushing your face up into my pussy.
I tell you to open your mouth so you can taste my sweet nectar.
You love that taste your nasty little slut!
While holding your leash tight I tell you to lick me slowly and then tongue fuck me till I tell you to stop!!
Moving my hips from side to side slapping you with my thick thighs........I pull you in closer
BITE ME YOU SLUT MAKE MOMMY SCREAM!!!
I cum so hard I fart in your face and you never miss a lick.
I grab your chin and bend over to lick my juices off your face.
I slap your face!!
Then push your head back and straddle your face so you can continue to please me.
Finger my ass while you tongue fuck me!!!!...................WOW
Ok I tried. I really really tried to go full on vanilla. I turned off everything. I deleted it all. I was serious. As soon as I was done the very next day I sank so far into depression. I really do hate my life. Why do I need this? Why can't I turn it off and be normal? Right now crying because there's not some man telling you what to do? Pathetic. Weak. How can I call myself a strong black woman? I'm pitiful and I can't even look at myself any more.
So why are you back then?
Like I said I'm pitiful. An ex-potential Master reached out that same next day. After 4 or 5 years ...he was like i missed you, still had your number blah blah blah and I bounced back. I do not think he is a Master but a very dark aggressive dominant vanilla man. He knows nothing of limits, protocols, needs and he blows past my limits all the time hence why I didn't submit to him before. I know I know I'm desperate. My kinks is force and control so though I know what he's doing is detrimental I also get off on my wants, and kinks being ignored for his pleasure.. OMG just the thought is making me wet and driving that insane need that's in me... Gawd I hate that feeling... No I love it, crave it but I hate that I have it ... That need that feeling ...if that makes sense. Gawd, I wish I was normal.
So I'm kinda back. The ex-potential and I will meet this Saturday so at least for a week I'm semi normal until I realize he can't be my Master and then I'll sink back into depression and wanting to end... Anyways I really do hate me. I wish there was a way to stop it. To go back to vanilla to be normal to... To... Anything is better than this
I rather seriously just end it all then continue having this need that can't be fulfilled .... I hate that my mental health is based off ownership... I hate that I went from crying and being in the dark to just happy because some guy said he MIGHT own me .. I hate how pathetic I am... I hate how weak I am .. I hate how my mind has all this taboo, gross, dark stuff... I hate me. I hate my life. If there was an easy non painful way for me to end it all I would have done that years ago.
I hate this feeling.
I hate this need.
I hate this craving.
I hate me.
Draw a symbol on your wrist or hand for me denoting you're mine. Could be a star or a heart. But make it small and cute.Then you can go about your day. And every time you notice it, you'll be reminded of what you really are. How badly you crave to be owned. How submissive your true nature is. How quickly you aim to please and obey.Make sure to keep track of how many times you looked at it. You'll be edging later to that amount.
These things fill my submissive dreams:My partner wants to lead a relationship based on a happy friendship and sharing positive feelings.My partner enjoys using chastity to satisfy her need to possess her lover. She enjoys being center of attention when she wears clothes that men cannot ignore, especially me. She wants a partner who submits to her excitement for taking control physically using locks and keys.She would like to use her man's sexual energy to teach him to obey her. She want license to be persuasive on her terms.She is willing to take time to acknowledge my service with little erotic rewards even when she is tired. Words are enough.She is interested in putting mutual health activities into our shared routines of life for which we are both responsible.I'd be happy to do yoga, massage and connective breathing as our most frequent intimate activities.I enjoy being appreciated for my sexual arousal as a compliment to you at the same time I enjoy being denied sex as sincere submission to you.I'd like to demonstrate my experience with turning arousal in chastity into the intense desire to make you happy in non-sexual ways.I feel loved when locked in chastity but still want to make love when you decide to take it off. Please lock it up when you are done.I want to believe that you require chastity to prevent masturbation so that I stay fully erect when you want me to be.I am enchanted to believe you like chastity because it prevents anyone else from tempting me, that you now own me without question.The chastity does not need to eliminate having sex, but to control when. A woman who blocks male masturbation is never lonely. It is an easy way to encourage a man to give more hugs and better kisses if he is thinking about sex but cannot touch himself anymore.
Today, I’m open to something a bit more direct.
A few of you may have the opportunity to speak with me on the phone.
Understand this clearly, this is not casual conversation, and it’s not open access.
If you approach, you do so with intention.
The rules:
You request—never assume.You ask for the opportunity. You don’t demand it, hint at it, or try to casually slide into it.
You introduce yourself properly.Name, location, and what you’re seeking clearly and without filler.
You respect my time.Be available, be prepared, and be concise. I’m not here for rambling or nervous energy.
You maintain composure.No over-talking. No interrupting. You listen as much as you speak.
You understand this is a privilege, not a right.Not everyone will be chosen. Most won’t.
This is about presence.
How you approach me before the call tells me everything I need to know about how you’ll carry yourself during it.
Choose your words carefully.
— Mistress Nikki Vixen
Hello there... we're a Dom/sub couple with a strong relationship; we have a history of 10 years so very much comfortable with each other, we are understanding and not new to this dynamic. She is owned by Him but is always submissive. This being the case, we're seeking a submissive female who would be possessed by both of us or other Dom Male/Females to posses her.
We prefer that you live in the GTA or within an hour drive from it, since we will be hosting.
We're fun and attractive and would love someone who is looking to lose themselves in an adventure where they can totally explore themselves with us or her.
Him 5’10” blue eyes, Medium Build with over 30 years as a Daddy Dom, well endowed, clean and shave, stern but patient, and will answer any questions and concerns you might have.
Her 5’10” blue/green eyes, small BBW with over 20 years as a sub, with 40 D’s clean and shaved.
Note: Dom Male/Females will have to discuss her limits before the funs starts, all submissive can talk directly with her new subs/Dom’s welcome as we love to teach and help you grow in your roll.
If you are interested please email and we will get back to you with a number you can text/talk with us if you like.
In the bustling aisles of the crowded store, a familiar presence halted her steps. There, amidst the sea of faces, she glimpsed him once more. He pulled a bottle of whiskey from the shelf, his eyes caught hers, and a smile appeared on his face. His eyes deepens like a predator on the prowl. Their life unfolded in fleeting scenes, in the intimate cocoon of their shared space, they found solace on the plush leather couch, bathed in the soft glow of dimmed lights. The air carried the delicate fragrance of roses and vanilla, an intoxicating blend that clung to her skin. As they nestled together, the subtle scent added a layer of warmth to the cozy atmosphere.
Her skin, soft as the gentle caress of a summer breeze, invited him closer. The curves of her form molded against the cushions, creating a haven of comfort. Long, brown, and curly, her hair cascaded with a wild and untamed beauty, echoing the free-spirited nature that danced within her.
His hand roamed around her body, exploring its entirety. His other hand held his favorite leash its leather warm and worn from his hand working the leather over the years of wear. He started letting the leash work through his hand pulling her head down slowly, further in to his lap.She turned her head to catch his eyes as she adjusted her body.“May I please?” Her sweet voice called to him like a sirens call, as his lip lifted in a half smile.“May you sir?” He said as he pulled on the leash making her head pull forward her nose pushing in to his cock.She looked up at him, “May I please suck your cock sir?” Her voice called up to hîm her hands running up his thighs.“Mmmm of course.” His voice growled.
Mixed emotions today. Lastnight was the first real munch we have had since COVID where everyone in our bdsm community was present. Not a real BDSM play event as usualy. Mostly friends catching up, conversation and casual sex.I was laughing with Goddess Tabitha when Master William put his arm around me and started to fondel me. I got tense and Goddess reninded me to know my place. He took me to the couch and he used my body for his pleasure. I don't know what is troubling me most, the fact that another man used me without Master James looking on or the fact that I really enjpoyed him using me. My orgasm was shattering both physically and emotionally.
Master James stroke took him from us months ago, but I still feel unfaithful even though he and Goddess Tabitha have always aloowed the men in our group to use me for their pleasure.
Just when you think your heart has healed.....
New Year
After a brief discussion this morning we have agreed on a few things to try and get the most out of 2023.
wearing my daily collar more often (as permitted by job, etc)
more butt plugs
less underwear
more outfits with access when home
more use of the belt
more opportunities for us to explore with others
Happy New Year!
+ NRA Bans Firearms During Donald Trump's Speech at Texas Event
BY ANDERS ANGLESEY ON 5/25/22 AT 7:51 AM EDT
The National Rifle Association (NRA) told attendees they will not be able to carry firearms during an event with former President Donald Trump at its Texas conference that will be held just days after a deadly mass shooting at an elementary school in the state.
On its website, the pro-gun organization declared that people would not be able to bring their firearms into the General Assembly Hall during its upcoming Annual Leadership Forum in Houston on Friday, May 27. In a notice, the NRA said firearms, toy guns and "weapons of any kind" would not be allowed inside the hall. It also listed several other items, such as laser pointers and signs among things that were prohibited.
The NRA described its annual leadership forum as being "one of the most politically significant and popular events in the country." But a shadow has been cast over the conference after 19 children and two adults were fatally shot at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Texas on Tuesday.
(more)
https://www.newsweek.com/nra-bans-firearms-during-donald-trumps-speech-texas-event-1709957#Echobox=1653480476
So, recently I did a photo shoot for something I am doing in a few months, I kinda wish I had waited for this as I want to lose more weight as I feel like I am still unattractive in my current state, but I had limited time to submit the required photo... grrr...
it's been a few decades since I've done a professional photo shoot, or any modeling for that matter, it was fun, and I may have to do it again soon...
the photo I just uploaded and hopefully gets past the bs approval process soon was one of the ones I really liked from the shoot... but not the one I used for my upcoming bid for a title... however, I will say it's been a confidence boost to see these pics and realize the progress my working out has been... it still amazes me the things I have accomplished and the direction I am headed!
currently I am hovering somewhere between the 225 - 230 weight range... my ultimate goal is to get back to the 160 -170 range... in the last year and a half I have gone from a 46 waist to a 36, I have gone from walking 5 feet and being exhausted to jogging for 2 minuets on the treadmill at a pace almost twice my normal walking pace and feeling ready for more when done... so yes the hovering bothers me, but no it doesn't at the same time.
I know I'll never be the 130 pound toned build I had into my mid thirties, but I also wont have the unhealthy habits I had that lead to the state I was/am in now either, so I can actually live with that!
3 things that hurt me, 1 smoking, 2 poor diet, 3 the heart failure diagnosis... 3 things I changed: 1 the last 4 years smoke free, 2 a healthier diet I actually follow, 3 I may not win the war, but the battle with the heart failure has been interesting... and I am winning, just like with my weight loss, not at the pace I want lol
As some here know, I host a weekly Social Group in Real Time here in Dayton. I has been put on the back burner as it where, due to work and life. I have set as a monthly event.
Last week we talked of Collars and leashes. The meaning and use of them. There was some open play as well some private in the play room. Being that it is on Sudays, the turn out was a bit lower than I hoped but that only let memebers and guest be more open and realxed. As aways it was a blend of BDSM , Swingers and those with Fetish or Freak tendaces.
Next month the focuse will be on Rope Art and Bondage.
MASTER R.
I thought I had found my person, my boy, my pet, my slave!!
In our process of communicating the only thing I asked of him is that he stayed in contact!!
Tell me how hard it is just to send a message in the morning, a message when you get to work, message me on break, if you get one, and message me when you get home!
I feel that's relatively easy, but the one thing that you do not do is give me a lame excuse for why it is that you could not message me!!
And then you want to send me messages out the wazoo the next day and tell me how much you miss me and want to hear my voice.........
This man is not a true submissive nor is he a slave! He has fallen into the commercialization of the lifestyle and is still pretending to be something he's not!!
Looking for permanent companionship.
I am poly and unpartnered currently.
What I am looking for is obedience and full time servitude.
I am not a nice person. If you please me, you will be rewarded. If you displease me, you will be punished. None of that bratty punishment. You will be punished in a way that you genuinely dislike. If chaining you up and leaving you alone is something that distresses you, that can be your punishment. If you dislike pain, or public humiliation, or anything really, I will make it happen so you genuinely suffer. If you want to be playful and want some of these things, just ask at an appropriate time and I will make it happen as long as you have not displeased me.
Also looking for genuine hypnosis subjaspects
I am not a monster, I am not a nice guy either.
Getting permanently collared
When its my turn to be collared permanently I have been wondering what kind of format that will take. Obviously it will be up to my master but I'm sure I want it to be special like a young bride dreaming of her wedding.
The quiet collaring
The collar goes on, and thats it, the bond is there between master and slave.
The small symbolic ceremony (and my favourite)
The collar gets locked into place and myself and my master go down to the beach and I throw the key into the sea. I think that is symbolic that the collar is going to be on permanently from now on.
The gathering
Some of masters friends ge together to watch the collaring and depending on whether master likes to share or not they all break in the newly owned slave.
I wonder when the time comes which one will be for me.
In vanilla terms I seek a single guy, lifestyle submissive, with FiVE years experience in a FLR whilst going out to pubs (munches) and clubs (FemDom fetish clubs) to go out with me in his car that he drives, three times a month, sometimes a little more. Long-term to first go for dinner, drinks and socialise. When the rapor is there I will give S&m play on his body in a fetish club. (I don't play at home.)
I call it the opposite theory.
When I was freshly divorced a few years back and made it clear I only wanted light-hearted fun, guys got upset because I declined a long-term relationship with them. After 20 years of marriage I was allergic to commitment.
As a Poly Dominant Woman, now looking for a single, live-out second guy.( I think seeing a guy a few times a month long-term can be seen as a relationship. Well I do anyway.) Unfortunately no guy who approaches is seeking long-term and I don't play on the first EiGHT meets. Though I like younger guys I am also aware they are not looking for commitment so won't be suitable for what I seek.
STRANGE FRUIT 2026 A PIECE I WROTE ABOUT ALL THE BULLSHIT GOING ON THIS COUNTRY STILL.
SEEMS LIKE WE ARE STILL HUNGRY FOR MORE STRANGE FRUIT . EVEN IN 2026 THE VULTURES HUNGER FOR THE SWEET FLESH SLOW HANGING ON THE VINE . AS THE BIRDS GATHER AND FIGHT FOR THE TASTE OF THE FIRST MORSEL . BUT THIS FRUIT IS NOT AS SWEET AS IT SEEMS BECAUSE UNLIKE TRUE FRUIT THIS DOESNT HAVE THAT SWEET TASTE THEY NORMALLY CRAVE. THIS FRUIT HAS ALWAYS HAS BEEN POISONED FROM THE ROOT TO SOUL I MEAN SOIL , IT GROWS FROM.THE GROUND SOAKED WITH CENTURIES OF BLOOD, PAIN,AND HATE. A BREEDING GROUND WHERE NOTHING THAT IS MEANT TO THRIVE GROWS DESPITE ALL THE BIRDS AND ANIMALS MEANT TO CUT ITS LIFE SHORT AND STUNT ITS GROWTH .THIS FRUIT THAT HAS BEEN BRED THROUGH YEARS, DECADES AND CENTURIES OF BLOOD , HATE, AND DEATH. BUT THIS FRUIT RESILIENT . GROWN UNDER THE PRESSURE OF OPPRESSION AND BEATENED DOWN. EVERYTIME THIS FRUIT BEGINS TO FLOURISH AND STARTS TO GROW TOWARDS THE SUN. THE CROWS START TO GATHER AND THE MOUTHS START TO WET, AS THEY STARE IN RAVENOUS HUNGER AT THE DELICIOUS FRUIT, WITH ITS SWEET NECTAR SLOWLY DRIPPING TO THE GROUND. THIS FRUIT THAT ALL THE CROWS AND CROWDS OBSESSED OVER, DID ANY EVERYTHING TO GET THEIR CLAWS ON. THE MOMENT THEY OBTAINED THIS FORBIDDEN FRUIT THEY CELEBRATED BY RIPPING APART THE FLESH . GOBBLING UP ITS SWEET BUT BITTER FLESH RELISHING IN THE EXCTASY . THIS RARE DELICACY THAT HAS BEEN GROWN AND PICKED FOR HUNDREDS OF YEARS. EVEN THROUGH THE ROUGHEST OF CONDITIONS FROM EXTREME DROUGHT TO DROWING IN THE JUICES OF THE OTHER FRUIT THAT WAS LEFT HANGING ON THE VINE .YOU CAN FIND THIS FRUIT YEAR ROUND .THIS RARE FRUIT ON THE VINE EVEN IN THE HARSHEST WINTER. STILL HANGS AND SWINGS IN THE BREEZE. THIS BEAUTIFUL RARE FRUIT THAT THEY ALL CRAVE. COMES IN SEVERAL VARIETIES. PICKED AT DIFFERENT STAGES SOME PICKED BEFORE THEY WERE MATURE OTHERS LATER IN THEIR GROWTH CYCLE.THIS FRUIT THAT COMES IN MANY VARIETIES. LIKE A YOUNG 21 YEAR I MEAN DAYS OLD VARIETY CALLED KYLE, OR A 31 AGED VARIETY CALLED DAPHY. FOR THOSE WITH MORE MATURE TASTES THEY ALSO HAD A VARIETY CALLED NURUL. BUT IF THOSE VARIETIES DONT INTEREST YOU I'M SURE If WE TURN OUR HEADS AND WAIT. A BRAND NEW YOUNG FRUIT WILL APPEAR. FRESH ON THE LINE I MEAN VINE. YOU WILL KNOW ITS THIS SPECIAL FRUIT. BY THE GATHERING OF THE CROWS. LISTEN YOU CAN HEAR THEM HUNGRILY CALLING. CAU CAW!
The only people I judge are judgmental people themselves.
OK, and people who've asked me to judge them. But that totally muddies the nice, clean quote. ;)
I have kicked around this scene of ours for long enough that I remember when YKINMKBIOK was plain survival. Before the web got into every home, if you knew a few people in your area, who were into kink, you clung to them. It didn't matter that I was into the mental side of things, into D/s, while one of them was into sploshing, another into male masochism and the third was into vinyl. That there were three others who were just as weird as me was AMAZING.
The huge growth of the scene, that we worked hard for, has been a huge blessing. But it's also given us so many others, that we can find so easily, it's easy to slip into judging others because, well, we'll have plenty of friends left. Don't like the way they do rope? Let's label them as wrong or dangerous. Squick over diapers? Let's call them freaks and borderline pedophiles. Don't like the way they do heavy mental play? Clearly abusers! And look how much better it makes our insecure selves feel about ourselves that we've managed to tear down others!
That's not me. I can't do it. I'm not into Daddy/little. I'm not into diapers. Fifty Shades isn't my BDSM ideal. Mind you, I'm not a huge fan of O, or Gor, either. But I love that others are! I love that you freaks and perverts have so much passion for the things you love. I think it's amazing, the really strong relationships you build around your interests. I am so deeply, deeply, happy that you can find peace in who you are.
Your Kink Is Not My Kink But It's OK. It's more than OK. Not for me, but I love that it works for you and good luck to you!
Whispers in the Dark
In shadows deep, where silence reigns,We found each other, bound by chains.A stranger’s touch, no names to speak,A pull so dark, it left me weak.
Your eyes, they burned—a hidden flame,I felt the heat before you came.A silent promise in the air,No need for words, just raw despair.
Fingers traced forbidden lines,In the dark, our bodies twined.A gasp, a moan, the night stood still,Desire bent to reckless will.
No questions asked, no futures planned,Just my body under your command.We danced between what’s wrong and right,Consumed by fire, lost to the night.
In the blackest void, we came undone,Two strangers, joined until the sun.And when you left, the shadows stayed—A ghost of pleasure, a price we paid.
A day in service
I rise at dawn, my body sore,
To chores and tasks, and much, much more.
The floor I scrub, the dust I chase,
A flick of the wrist, a stern command sets the pace.
Her coffee brewed, just so, just right,
I dare not fail, in morning's light.
Her silk robe flows, a queenly sight,
I bow my head, avoid her light.
The day is long, a string of tests,
To prove my worth, to quell her jests.
A word of praise, a precious prize,
Reflected in her knowing eyes.
The afternoon, a humbler task,
Her boots to clean, that's all I ask.
To kneel and wipe, to polish well,
The story that my movements tell.
The sun descends, the day is done,
The final test has now begun.
She summons me with one sharp look,
My place is found, my writing's in a book.
Her throne awaits, a velvet chair,
I crawl toward her, breathless, aware.
The day's devotion finds its end,
My goddess, whom I can't transcend.
Her sacred space, my final quest,
My weary head upon her breast.
My tongue performs the rite so true,
My world is her, in every hue.
When fantasy meets reality, some men find themselves lost in the space between what they imagine and what truly exists. In a world filled with movies, games, social media, and idealized images, it becomes easy to mistake fantasy for attainable truth. They may chase unrealistic versions of women, power, or status, forgetting that real life is imperfect, complex, and grounded in responsibility. When the line between fantasy and reality fades , disappointment, frustration, and confusion often follow. Learning to see life as it is—not as we wish it to be—takes maturity and self-awareness. True strength lies in facing reality head-on, appreciating genuine experiences over illusions, and building a life that is real, not imagined. Men...you need to do better.
I love eating ass, rimming, pegging, prostate massage. I LOVE cocks, the more the merrier.
A few fetishes:
Natural bush (me and men)
Cock worship
*Raw sex, dripping of jizz
Nipple suckling and biting
ANR/ABF nursing fetish
Edging and Tease
* Because of the riskier nature of raw sex, I get tested regularly and am picky about sexual partners. As such, I expect you to be as well. (IUD in place so no one's getting pregnant)
THE ISSUE WITH LONG-DISTANCE...
This is by NO WAY an exhaustive list, just some things to consider before you message me that you'd like to get to know me. If you live over 30 miles away, be prepared to send a message that includes addressing some of these things. Please...and thank you!!
Let's talk about getting to know someone long-distance. I'm not talking about a partner that has moved, and temporarily you're needing to keep the relationship long-distance, I'm talking about establishing a new one...getting to know someone NEW that lives far away.
On paper, I can understand that a great match for anyone may not be in their own city/town. And I can totally understand that many people feel that with today's technology, it is much much easier to get to know someone far away and they would be correct! With phone calls (yes just like the olden days, people still talk on the phone), with FaceTime/Skype and video chats, we can get a great sense of someone before we've met them in person!
The issue for me is that I'm slightly on the demi-sexual side and so it is imperative to meet someone in person within a week or so of chatting because that's really the only way I'll be able to confidently say, "Oooo this is someone I think I would like to do stuff with naked." Clearly, this is problematic when considering someone out-of-town.
Because of where I am in life as a parent (the last teen still 2 years away from college), where I am with work (small business owner that could work remotely, with a LOT of planning) and where I am with finances (enough to cover my bills, but not enough to afford to move out of state as that can cost $5-$10k easily), if you want to get to know me to possibly date and see if we might be a good kink/romantic match, you will need to address these three main concerns. How would you do that? Get creative:
Offer to be extremely communicative for a week to 10 days, not just a little here and there, but a concentrated effort
Spend some time on the phone with me, like in the olden days LOL
If it feels right, offer to come to/near Cincinnati to have lunch/dinner and spend some quality in-person time together EXPECTING that no clothes will be removed
If we have lunch/dinner and one or both of us feels meh about the other, GRACIOUSLY accept that decision and don't force anything out of guilt or obligation
After that point, should we BOTH decide we'd really like to get to know each other and date/spend time together (which MUST include in-person, not just online or over the phone), be prepared to have some solutions to the issues I mentioned above in order to move forward. Some examples:
"I can move to Cincinnati and rent an apartment near you for a year while we pursue each other, then move-in/get married/whatever."
"I can afford to fly you to me several times a month to me during the get-to-know-you period"
"If we decide to build a fabulous kinky-life together I can afford to move you here and help make sure your responsibilities with your house in Cincinnati are met"
REMINDER: This is by NO WAY an exhaustive list, just some things to consider before you message me that you'd like to get to know me. If you live over 30 miles away, be prepared to send a message that includes addressing some of these things. Please...and thank you!!
Yeah, I thought I would get back here sooner.. shit happens.
Started getting all my medical stuff going this year. Ugghhh.
I am not looking for oral anything. My concerns this year involve going after the plastic surgeon who f'd up my reconstruction so severely it impacts the rest of my life and sue the f'er. I have to have what he did fixed. Firmly believe he shit on me because I am a medicaid patient. So, my focus is more personal health, at the same time, I have both art and print on demand stuff I am doing, my gardening is just picking up and getting busy at home, and I have an audio podcast I need to get going. On ssi at 560 a month sucks dirty dick.
If you want to be submissive to me, you have to have something to offer in return, not necessarily money, but say vanilla services that help me. Otherwise, I am busy as fuck making the next 20 years of my life better.
As I usually find my relationships in person doing stuff, make it good to get my attention, or I won't waste my time.
Approaching me about your needs is stupid.
Lola the Iron Mistress
ALL ABOUT MY CFNM TEA PARTIES
For years women have been sexually ified in magazines, on social media and in daily life. But what happens when the rôles are reversed, what happens when the tables are turned and men are ified by women?
Most alternative events ify women, but there is one particular event that reverses the rôles. This is the Clothed Female, Naked Male party. CFNM by definition gives the power back!
Ladies of elegance and sophistication are cordially invited to take the opportunity to mingle with their peers whilst sipping their wine and enjoying the entertainment.
Come & join the the AcadaMay CFNM Ladies' Tea Party every month for an afternoon of tea & wine with lashings of decadence. All whilst being served by underlings who will be there solely to serve and cater to our every whim. You will never want to go to a vanilla tea party again!
Ladies, this is your chance to be served by men and ify them. CFNM includes activities that are not particularly oriented towards female dominance and superiority, but a modicum of humiliation and punishment to the nude men not behaving according to protocol would be expected, nay, encouraged!
Gentlemen, this is your chance to parade yourself in an elegant social setting, to have the opportunity to serve and make yourself compliant to the request of any lady present without demur or backchat. If you wish to have this experience, come and join the ladies for an afternoon of CFNM.
Notes:
My parties do not have the express aim of being a dating service, but naturally, long lasting connections are often made.
The AcadaMay CFNM Ladies Tea Party is not generally suitable for couples as a fluid dynamic is necessary to achieve the perfect decadent dichotomy. It is also extremely inclusive and an absolutely safe and comfortable environment for single ladies attending on their own who wish to explore alternative scenarios in situation where they will be supported. As such, it is obviously not suitable for hen party like groups of ladies.**
All guests (both male and female) at the Tea Party will either need to be known personally by myself or will need to contact me with some brief details about themselves and a face photo so I know who they are. All in the strictest confidence and with the ultimate of discretion ;)
The ACADAMAY - THE ONLY CFNM IN EUROPE.
THE FRIENDLIEST, CLASSIEST, MOST INCLUSIVE KINKY AFTERNOON EVER.
DISCERNING LADIES, RELAX AMONGST YOUR PEERS!
IMPECCABALE GENTLEMEN ONLY MAY APPLY TO SERVE THEIR SUPERIORS
BDSM FRIENDLY, BRING YOUR TOYS
HIGHEST DISCRETION AND PRIVACY GUARANTEED
Email: acadamayevents@gmail.com
SOME REVIEWS!
This Tea Party was a riot💃🏽- so many worthy 🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆! Thank you Mistress May once again for letting us have such a good time. Miss V
Thank you for a lovely evening Master May. I was thrilled to win the Christmas entertainment. You and the ladies are as cool as fuckMark N0. 3
Thanks to @Master-May for some brilliant organisation. Female empowerment. Males humbled and made to serve in a variety of ways. For my part I was stripped, plugged, displayed and disciplined by some amazing dommes. Ordered and sometimes f***** to lie face down on the bed, my naked body would be casually groped, stroked and intimately touched by any number of ladies who took the fancy, and plenty did. I was reduced to nothing more than their playtoy - sexually ified, casually degraded, all while they sipped wine and made conversation with each other. A thoroughly humiliating experience and I've never felt more turned on in my entire life. DEE & Miss El
Yes a great evening love it so many classy women ??Bum is now very sore ?? Jon
I just wanted to say a massive thank you for such a wonderful event last night! I had an absolutely fantastic time! I've been 3 times now and it's always the highlight of my month. Ms. A
Chastity
Chastity strictly speaking is a state of being. The connotation is concerned with purity. In olden times a chaste person was assumed to be free form venereal disease. Further it was thought that person would also have certain character attributes. That their thinking was free of prurient interest was a major attribute. In other terms they did not sexualize things or people.
An individual in locked in a chastity device without orgasm will over time gain the same state of innocence. So yes, My slave property will be kept in chastity. Once this state is entered the slave will find a peace and contentment it may not have recollection of ever entering in its past existence. For some, it will be a state of serenity. Will I allow slaves to live continuously in such bliss? Not likely.
This state of being occurs over time in males after castration. This return to the innocence of prepuberty is the basis for My considering chastity as a form of castration if but temporary and reversible.
Interestingly, if a chastised individual is allowed the pleasure of orgasm and ejaculation it will, over time, return to the sexually obsessed state it may have had prior to the period of denial. This phenomenon marks one of the differences between castration and chastity. The period of time differs from one to another. My experience indicates about six months.
Freeing a slave from whatever sex centered ideation it may have leaves its brain available for service to its Superior Owner. This, of course, is a desirable thing. Therefore, most all of My slave property will be locked in chastity. slave’s period of denial, at least for the first couple of weeks, can be a grueling torturous event. Locking a slave’s cock in an inflexible irremovable cage will over time result in changes the Master finds most desirable.
At least initially. Locked up some ‘male’ penises will try repeatedly and with marginal success to gain erection and relief for its swollen prostate. its mind will become fixated on sexual things and frustration. it may well experience actual pain and mental distress: true anguish. This period may last days or weeks. Sleep for a few nights may be very difficult. Nights will be spent awake, or semi so, with the sexual ideation and unfulfilled need for sexual release. The discomfort of the slave is one of many things that can bring pleasure to Me as a sadist.
After the slave has served Me the blissful state of prepubescence I will start the whole process over again. Milking probably without orgasm will occur. A period of time will elapse with regular sexual release until its old way of thinking with its penis will be established. At some point in time after the establishment, the old chastity cage will be locked on it and it will start the delightful, at least delightful for Me, process over again.
Yes, chastity will occur for female slave as well. Mechanically, with some differences as one might expect.
The Ocean Does Not Apologize for Its Depth
There are women who dominate and there are women who *are* dominance, the way the ocean is not something that contains water but is the water, is the depth, is the pressure and the pull and the ancient, indifferent power of something that existed long before you arrived on its shore and will exist long after you have gone. I am the second kind. This is not a role I step into. It is what I am made of, down to the cellular level, the way the ocean is made of salt and motion and the kind of patience that only belongs to things that have never once needed to hurry.
You come to the shore of me with everything you are. I want you to understand what that means before you take another step.
The ocean does not meet you halfway. It does not soften its edges to make the entry more comfortable. It simply is what it is, in its entirety, at full depth and full force, and what happens to you when you enter it is entirely dependent on your willingness to stop fighting the current and let the water do what water does. The people who struggle against the ocean are the ones it takes. The ones who surrender to it, who release the desperate grip of their own buoyancy and let the water take the weight, those are the ones who discover that it will hold them. That the very thing that felt like it would consume them is also, in its way, the most complete support they have ever known.
This is the theology of your surrender. Not the performance of it. The real thing.
I want you empty. Genuinely, completely empty, cleared of every opinion about yourself that you arrived with, every defense you have constructed across a lifetime of needing to protect something, every carefully managed presentation of who you are and what you can handle and how much you are willing to give. I want the vessel clean. Because I intend to fill it, every part of it, with something it has never held before, and there is no room for what I am bringing if you are still crowded with what you came with.
Walt Whitman wrote that he contained multitudes. You, in this context, will contain precisely one thing: me. My will, my presence, my pleasure, my standard, my voice in the place where your own voice used to be the loudest thing in the room. This is not diminishment. This is the most complete thing I know how to offer another person. To be so thoroughly known and so thoroughly claimed that the boundary between your purpose and my desire becomes academic, becomes irrelevant, becomes a line so worn from crossing that it simply ceases to exist.
The ocean fills every space available to it. Every crack in the rock, every hollow in the sand, every place that offers itself and every place that does not, eventually. It does not ask permission of the shoreline. It simply arrives, and it arrives completely, and it keeps arriving, tide after tide, with the patient certainty of something that has never once doubted its own nature or its own direction.
That is what my dominance feels like from the inside. The certainty of water finding its level.
Matthew Arnold stood on Dover Beach and heard the ocean's roar as the sound of a world that offers neither joy nor love nor light nor certitude nor peace, only the eternal note of sadness underneath everything human. But I hear it differently. I hear it as the sound of something that does not negotiate. Something that has been devouring shorelines since before language existed to describe the loss, that takes the rock and the sand and the carefully constructed walls of human certainty and makes them, over time, into nothing but new shapes of itself. The ocean does not mourn what it consumes. It simply continues. This is the quality of my dominance that I most want you to sit with: not the drama of it but the continuity. The patient, absolute, unstoppable continuation of a nature that was never going to be anything other than what it is.
Give me everything. Not the generous portion. Not the carefully considered offering of the parts of yourself you have decided you can afford to lose. Everything. The parts you are proud of and the parts you are ashamed of and the parts you have never shown anyone because you were not certain they could be trusted with them. Bring all of it to the water. Let it go. Watch what I do with it.
Because here is what the ocean knows that the shore does not: the surrender is the point. The emptying is not the loss. It is the preparation. The space you clear when you release everything you have been holding is exactly the space I intend to inhabit, and what I bring to fill it is larger and stranger and more sustaining than anything you were protecting by keeping yourself so carefully full of yourself.
You were not built to be your own container. You were built to be mine.
Kneel at the water's edge. Feel the pull of it. That pull is not danger. That pull is recognition.
I release what I was before this shore.
I bring myself empty and offer that emptiness as gift.
I am the hollow that her presence fills.
I do not end where she begins.
I am most myself when I am most completely hers.
The ocean does not ask permission.
Neither does she.
I am grateful for both.
Go under.
She will bring you back.
She always does.
tonight i miss you
19 years and counting. i still don't know your name. i still don't know your face. but you have to be out there.
i miss you every day. but nights like tonight are harder.
things are rough right now....big jess is worn and little jess is despondent.
just for tonight if only i could see you, if only i could hear you, smell you feel you.
maybe if you could hold me and tell me somehow this will all work out i could keep going better. but i can't.
tonight i hit another wall another moment where the adult me has to push and the little me hides more and more, it's not safe to be out.
daddy i don't know why you've been gone for so long but i really wish you could hold me right now and talk to me and just for one night we could go to sleep together.
even if it was just a moment and the stars and spirit took you away from me again...just one moment would fill my juice cup so big.
someone told me it sounds like a good country song, "19 years of looking and he's still not here".
every day i feel your absence. but tonight is one of those impossible nights.
tonight i miss you.
I Just realized on Dec 26th 19 years ago today. I went to be my first munch and became a member of my local BDSM community. I remember being so nervous. I had never dated or anything before that day. I was happy when I read an erotic novel and found the term BDSM and went down the rabbit hole. All the years I would have dreams and desires not understanding and thinking I was alone. I was 30 years old and started researching on AOL, Yahoo chat, the great websites at the time. To find the munch group and got my scene name from my email address. So nervous to meet at the munch group, Only about 5 of us were there that night being right after Christmas. I was so happy and excited and felt like I finally found home and people that would accept me and welcome me.
The lifestyle was fun and learned a lot but also wasn't the greatest as I would jump into things and the 7.5 years I was active did expereince abuse that still scares me today. I have triggers but also realize this is who I am and can't just be vanilla. I have missed being active in the lifestyle and miss my BDSM family. One day hope to find the right partners and get back to being active again.
I call this my BDSM birthday. And glad I found it. Just more cautious now.
I have never worn a chastity belt outside of squeezing into one(painfully) for like 30 minutes at most at a time here and there.And I recently found a site that showed me how to measure, and sadly(sadly?!?) to my non-surprise, i'm much too large and need a custom belt. One that costs $200-300, not the $30-50 belts that seem to be everywhere.And I think back to a recent conversation I had with a Dominant. That they don't see the point. That if they tell their slave not to cum, they want and expect their slave not to. And they wouldn't want them not to.Besides, they want to make use and enjoy the orgasms, so again the belt is unneeded.And having always had to do just that. I agree. And I understand.I don't have no particular joy or desire or need for chastity or denial. I would be very happy having some form of sex and orgasm daily or more just as I would being denied for days or weeks or more.For me, I don't NEED a belt. But thinking about it, what I NEED is a lack of control. And the belt can help with that.I was thinking about that today... How could I explain that idea to someone, and came up with a story of sorts that I see as being a good way of explaining it.Imagine my orgasm is a pile of cookies in the Kitchen. My owner can say - "don't eat the cookies unless I tell you". And I could/would obey. But then again I also could disobey and eat if I see a chance to.(I wouldn't in reality - i'm not bratty like that) But even though I was told not to, the ultimate power and control of my actions is held by me. I CHOOSE not to. I CHOOSE to obey. Which in and of itself is a powerful thing for the dynamic. But my thought here goes beyond that.Now imagine a lock on the kitchen door. That symbolizes the belt. With a lock, it doesn't matter my choice or decision or even my desire - I have no choice. That was removed from me. The control I had in any way shape or form to obey or not obey is removed from me.And it's that removal of control that the belt can bring. I would only have a cookie when my owner allowed. When it pleases them to do so. And that brings a different dynamic to the relationship.Even if that is one where I eat cookies daily or more even. I only do so when my owner unlocks the kitchen and allows me to. Otherwise, like it or not, I wait. Helpless and not in control.And it's that, that appeals to me about chastity belts more than anything else. It's like bondage, but a bondage that can be applied 24/7/365.So it has always intreagued me. That, and the fact I can never really fit in one so it's like a teenager desiring beer, the more you're unable to have it, the more you crave the experience of it, at least once. Anyways, just some random musings from my head. The end result with everything? Whatever pleases most. I don't need it, I don't not need it. The relationship matters more. I may always wonder how it may be though. For better or worse. But I can be happy never trying it just as I could/would being made to live with it 24/7.So like I said, just some random, maybe meaningless musings... thank you for visiting my mind with me this night...
The Gift (ending)
After awhile she got up and stood behind me. I could feel her hands slowly glide over my body from my arms to my hips. I moaned at her touch. Then with both hands she placed them on my hips and pushed me forward. I was being stretched. I could see my reflection and I realized that the mirror wasn't for me but it was for her. I could see her looking at the effaspects of the torment as our eyes met in the reflection.
I moaned loudly as I my head tilted back. The chains rattled as I strained to endure the torture. She released me and I swung back to my original position. She went back to the chair and sat down. Your body was made for torture she said.
She lit another cigarette and watched. I hung there trying to comprehend my situation. I felt like my body no longer belonged to me. I was now her torture toy. My body betrayed me. My nipples were hard and erect and I was sweating now.
This went on for a long time. Back and forth.
Finally after a long time I heard her cell phone vibrate. She looked at it and then at me. She said Fifteen more minutes.
What choice did I have. I hung in my chains and suffered some more.
She got up and left. A few minutes later my Domme returned. She smiled at me and unchained me. Go to the bedroom she said. I want to have tortured sex. She walked out and I glanced over at the ashtray. There were 8 cigarette butts there.
Next up. The Gift pt 2
As a Master I envision my role as more than just a mere figure in their lives, but rather as a sentinel, a guardian who stands at the forefront of their futures. It's an inherent part of my responsibilities and duties to shield them from harm, while also steering them in the right direction. In this world filled with endless possibilities, paths and unforeseen challenges, I perceive myself as the beacon of light that navigates them through their journeys.
Moreover, it is my explicit role to ensure they become the most refined versions of themselves. I do not wish for them to merely become part of the crowd, but to fully embrace their uniqueness and potential, and ultimately realize the zenith of their capabilities. The world we live in is diverse and enriched with various talents, abilities, and strengths. Therefore, I bear the responsibility of kindling the spark within them, helping them unearth their hidden talents, fostering their skills, and aiding them in scaling new heights of achievement.
It's crucial to understand that it is not about trying to mold them into something they are not, but rather assisting them in tapping into the reservoir of potential that lies within, to become the best versions of themselves. This entails encouraging them to consistently strive for excellence, motivating them to surpass their limitations, and helping them cultivate an indomitable spirit that cherishes the pursuit of learning, growing, and evolving.
Thank you for all who have congratulated Goddess Tabitha and I on our wedding! Im getting the same questions over and over so Im going to summerize the events of the day here. Was this a BDSM wedding? Not really. The members of our BDSM group all met at Master Geoffery and slave Tammy's home for the ceremony. Master Geoffery actually became a minister in the Universal Life Church so that he could preform our special dayThe food was a potluck. I know what you're thinking but the feast was amazing! Master Richard and slave Wendy brought 6oz lobster tails and Master Thomas and slave Gina brought Ribeyes. There was so much food they only cooked half of the ribeyes as half of a ribeye added to the lobster tails made a huge meal and that doesn't include the clam chowder or the shrimp coctails. If I hadn't been wearing a corsett I would have burst from eating all of that great food.Speaking of my corsett. I wore a white underbust corsett with garter straps and white stockings. I found this absolutly adorable pair of white lace stilettos at JJ's house online. ADORABLE! Goddess Tabitha whispered into my ear during our first dance that aftrer the wedding was over she was claiming my heels as hers LOL She did too!The veil. I found the cutest veils at Davids bridal. Did you know that they have a create your own veil option? I bought one off the rack, but if you're creative you can run wild.We wrote our own vows. Mine were the standard love honor and obey bridal vows adding an oath to my complete submission and obedience for as long as I live. Goddess Tabitha omitted the obedience part and added an oath of Dominance and protection for as long as she lives.I gave her a 1ct solitare from Jarred and she gave me a simple gold band with the word slave inscribed inside. Then she suprised us all by giving me new nipple rings as well. It was so cute!I wasn't wearing my ankle or wrist cuffs but I did have a white leather collar on and it was also new and fit my outfit perfectly.No whips and chains although some of the Doms gave me a seious love pat or two on my ass as we danced lolLastly, for the guys who keep asking, no I wasn't allowed panties and my breasts were bare as it was an undercup corsett. I don't know why the men find that to be such a need to know thingIt was the best day of my life! Oh, again foir the guys, there was NO bdsm play on our wedding night. Just went to bed with the goal of making love as many times as we could.Best day of my entire life!
I think one of the hardest parts for people who are interested in me as a domme who are strictly online or faraway is that I am very extroverted
I check messages and forget to reply . I do a lot in my vanilla life and I'm moderately popular. I just went to 2 birthday parties, I have another next week. I go to bbqs, camping, raves, hiking, etc.
And I'm also very involved in my local community.
Speaking of hiking I had such a nice conversation with a pup about work out routines and how I enjoy a lot of scenery where I am and would love to one day take him on a walk 💗 very sweet.
But all of that to say: as much as I get hundreds of messages and would love to get to everyone, I am very picky with where I put my time as a Goddess. As well as aware of how many people want my attention. That is just the nature of the lifestyle
But I hope you all keep your faith. Perhaps get in your knees and pray your Goddess will rescue you from your day to day life.
Here is an open thought.
I am not on this site to find love.
I have been loved, I have been engaged twice to the same man, that was a wild ride.
I am not the type to have kids, however I can see myself adopting the runt of a litter who has no hope and a limited future and share my survival skills to make the runt the front runner in life. I have always loved being the assumed underdog in life.
I am a working professional so I will expect a man I try to connect with to be the same.
I am not interested in a person's bank balance or assests, honestly none of my business.
I do expect a man who is in my company to not be a cheap skate and I have met a couple.
I am not expecting to be bought but I do expect if a man wants a BORN women who enjoys her feminity I should not have to spell out make an effort with flowers, make an effort with running the bath, make and effort with you see a pretty dress or skirt and think I know ONE women in my company who would look good in that.
I appreciate men contact me and offer they want to be one of my two men but when I ask you to unmask yourself and tell me who you are, I want to know I am not inviting an unkept, unwashed, unclean, diseased, unemployed dread of society into my world or my bed.
I don't think that is a hard ask.
If you want to see my face not an issue, I do WhatsApp and you can even video chat for all I care but if you make me jump hurdles I will make you jump the same bar.
C
Thought time for another update.Still looking for that true lifestyle Owner to take kjay into TOTAL 247 ownership as Their slave to use as They wish and make Their lives easier and more pleasurable. Think as stated before, for the right Owner kjay will give himself totally to Them as slave property , leave all current life behind, to be owned and serve , as a slave should.
A number of chats have been done recently but so far none have resulted in kjay being taken as slave property, so the search for an Owner continues.
kjay thanks his "slave bother" who is helping to keep kjay focused at the moment, while unowned, this is helping alot
What Is she doing?
Dear reader, I’ve been told that I can drone on about these things but for lifestylers, the minutia of it all is fun to read about. I had a lot of things to do to set this scene up. By this time, there were groups of people from the convention walking around and looking at all the play areas there. There was a throne room, a cage, various crosses, spanking benches, bondage tables and the like. It was a big play space with lots of equipment to use. There I am, in the back, quietly setting up my scene. I’m still in street clothes but I’m getting some attention from passersby. I know where everything is so I’m just doing my thing and getting into the subspace.
First, I adjust the lighting. The suspension station had this big overhead light fixture which I don’t need and so I have to turn it off. To do this, I had to grab this very long pole device which is used to change lightbulbs in tall areas and use it to unscrew the blub so it goes out. I prefer the eerie look of a darker area because it reminds me of the scary dungeons you see in the movies. People are watching me now, not sure about what I’m doing.
Next, I roll up the Oriental rug placed underneath the chain hoist of the suspension station which exposes the bare concrete floor beneath it and place it away. I then screw in two eyebolts into the recessed mounts in the floor and attach two pieces of chain to each eyebolt. These will be for my ankles. I place two large black light fixtures on either side of the area and turn them on.
Lastly, I replace the 2ft spreader bar attached to the chain hoist with a 4ft one I brought and attach two suspension cuffs to them. Everything has been measured out and I’m just about ready. I just had to get the management to play some Enigma on the stereo system. By now, a group of people are standing and watching. My friends, who’ve seen this before, find places to sit so they have a good view. Time to strip.
not to complain, but I'm gonna... you see, my mean evil hateful trainer took away my sugar... it's been a week of no sweet tea, sugar in the coffee, no donuts, sodas, cookies or even worse, no ice cream (who the hell does he think he is???)!!!!
honestly, except for the no ice cream thing, I am taking it pretty well... I mean, no one has died... yet...
the IGRA Royalty Competition is coming up fast, October will be here before I know it, just a few (60) more pounds to lose to my goal weight, and a few more inches to shave off the gut and waist, I'm getting there slower than I wanted but getting there... I am almost ready, just a few things left to sort out...
I still want ice cream... (are you sure this isn't "cruel and unusual punishment"?)
Once agion I am reminded that "Werner Heisenberg — ‘Not only is the Universe stranger than we think, it is stranger than we can think. so there is hope
MstrB writing from midtown
been looking for one decent slave for some time now
it will be well trained for a variety of domestic services
and hopefully
for the slaves sake
it is able to learn from its corrections
…even better if it already knows exactly what it’s good for!
...all its further educating will be done
with a strap kept very close by....
it will be made to understand it has
no rights
no privileges
no freedom
to come or to go
without asking for
and receiving
express permission
so much in life is correctly forbidden to a slave
and it must be reminded of this consistently
if not constantly
slave has no secrets
no privacy
or much time alone
and certainly no participation
or place
in any considerations or discussions
about things going to be done with the slave
in fact it has no say in much of anything
slaves Owner will have full authority over
the slave and its affairs
and will use that authority very strictly
I am understanding of slaves condition
I am sympathertic to its plight
and always give a slave what it needs
but allow very little of what it wants
this is both an Owners prerogative over the slave
as well as an extension of a kind of parental authority
therefore no disrespect
or disobedience will be permitted
...ever!
MrB
------------------------------------------------------------------------
I use…and enjoy very much using… real discipline- isolation- humiliation-lots of busy work in the home...all to train a female to a level of acceptable domesticity…sort of housebreaking the slave…teaching both the need for her focused Obedience and the necessity to perform with humility and accuracy whatever is demanded from her
chores chores chores…so much to be done….so many things to attend to...
upon collaring slaves pussy will be immediately closed for business as her chastity must be clearly established for the oversexed sluts own good...she will have no orgasms until permitted ..her hands fingers etc will be kept from her vaginal area except for purposes of good hygiene and then only under direct supervision...
rule of thumb...a slave will be fully given what she needs and very very little of what she wants.
so I am here seeking full Ownership of such a woman and she would do well to have a real slave personality....certain qualities will be emphasized in her training as more wanted than others...humility for instance...a highly prized quality that can't be stressed enough and that is wholly attractive to see when presented with sincerity …she will be shown how to provide service as the Obedient intelligent servant she was born to be… she will complement my life and basically make things easier for me in whatever way she is called on…as a relationship develops between Owner and slave she will come to appreciate more and more the kinds of support and guidance given to her... she will learn to approach her Owner with nothing less than demonstrable Respect under all circumstances… her training in how to properly submit herself will never really end so her attention will be directed to intellectual things I will insist she consider and think about...adult slave lessons on a cerebral level…
she will be stripped, anally plugged and put into a submissive position on her knees or perhaps ordered to freeze on her tiptoes... she will then be closely questioned about these things…her answers are required and truly valued… she must be responsive and forthcoming to all questions about her feelings her moods and her progress in becoming more servile and useful..the point being to make her a better servant and a more responsive slave....these interrogations and her confessions of her feelings will be a ritual she will learn to anticipate and expect …the reasons for them are simple..I want her to be fully aware of her condition in this lifestyle and in my life most of all…she belongs to me as my property and she is subject to my discipline my control my desires and decisions for her… I want her to learn to accept and in the end embrace the benefits she enjoys thanks to me because I do what I think is best for her…
I will do whatever needs to be done to turn this woman into the best slave she can possibly be
…I am a sexual sadist all my life and knew this when I was about eight or nine though I had no idea of the implications…
I use many forms of personality and behavioral techniques.. real discipline, humiliation, isolation, very tight bondage, sensory dep... whatever I find has the greatest effect on her emotions..
I will happily enforce her Obedience until she learns to respectfully offer it...one way or another I will get what I want from her…she will be trained to domestic service of various kinds...she will be watched closely and fairly judged on how well she performs these tasks and she will be unfailingly punished when she fails to do them as instructed...her good service is a pure reflection of her Respect for her Owner and her place in his life... her Obedience is the essence of her slave self....to be useful in all ways and show that she knows her place at all times is one of her many goals as the slave she is.... and her training will center heavily on perfecting her attitude as she is carrying out the tasks given her ...no matter what the work or activity is, it must be performed with a pleasing attitude...with humility...
and if not?...
so many reasons a woman offers to give her a memorable correction…as though a reason were even needed.
I am open for discussion of all issues which will come up and need to be addressed to keep things balanced and harmonious between Owner and slave…she will be safe and protected from as much of the outside world as she wants to not have to deal with... I welcome the amazing emotional connections that come from a successful M/s relationship and take full responsibility for what I do !... not everything can be solved with a strap but for a true slave? nothing else will do……McB
After discussing my challenges with dating or even befriending certain types of people, my friend wants to come up a snappy phrase for me to use that translates into, "Yes, but your complete list of Issues Has to Fit in Large Print on an Index Card or It’s Too Much for Me.”
That's much pithier than what I originally said, so ... progress!
Using this instead of updating profile.
Been away for a few years, just popped back to peruse, see if much has changed however this being a free site, will attract some very unsavoury characters who will be rude, obnoxious, abusive, intrusive, demanding and self entitled. Go give your head a wobble if you approach me in that manner.
Being a northern lass, I am blunt and will say as I see it. I'm also quite astute, very independent, self sufficient and very happy to remain that way. I chose to have people in my life that do not bring drama, lie, gaslight and are narcissistic. Yes, I do have submissive tendencies however do not expect me to give it from the 1st contact, ask personal and intimate details and assume I'm a doormat. Respect is earned, especially from internet strangers. I can walk away from negative behaviour very easily, with the door shut firmly in your face.
I have experience and knowledge of D/s.
I live in one of the most beautiful parts of the country, West lakes. I have the sea, fields, mountains and hills for my view. Sheep and cows for neighbours. The start of the lakes are a half hour drive away. I enjoy days out on my motorbike either alone or in a group when its not raining!
Anyway, those who are genuine, good luck and be happy.
Tara for now
J
The pool party was in Royal OUak, a very nice suburb of Houston. I was admiring all the large homes with long driveways and manicured lawns. When I arrived at the house, I pulled into the driveway and parked behind a Tesla. I checked my face in the mirror and got out of my car. I wore a black string bikini under a black cover up with a pair of wedges and some sunglasses.
I could hear voices, music and splashing on the other side of the privacy fence. I opened the door and I looked around. From my left was the back of the house that had a covered patio. The large yard surrounded a big pool with lounge chairs and tables with umbrellas. To the right was a tiki bar. I headed there.
Heather called out to me , "Hey! I'm glad you made it. Why don't you get a cocktail and chill? Bartender? Give her whatever she wants."
I smiled and asked for a hurricane. Coming right up, he said. I looked around and saw people enjoying the day. Most were in or near the pool. There was mostly a mixture of 20 and 30 somethings. A group of four were sitting at a table enjoying a blunt. I headed there.
Me, smiling: Can I try?
"Sure gorgeous" a handsome guy said and handed it to me. "Hey are you that new girl I heard about?"
Me, smiling: "Maybe!"
Heather, waving to get my attention: "Come here I want to introduce you to someone.". She led me towards the house as Jim and another man were emerging from the back.
Jim, looking at the other man: This is the one I told you about." This is Renee, he provides the financing for my movies. "
Renee, smiling at me: It's nice to meet you. I heard you have a nice set of abs. May I see them?
I opened my cover up and showed off my body. I flexed my abs and instinctively did a bicep pose.
Renee, still smiling: You have a very nice body. Any tattoos?"
Me: "No, I'm all natural.". I glanced at Heather, smiling.
Jim, to me: "Enjoy the party. We'll talk later." And the two men walk back inside the house.
Heather, to me: "Let's go swimming."
And we spent the rest of the afternoon just partying and enjoying the pool. Throughout the day I met other people in the movie business. There was a black female actress. A Latino male actor said hello. I met a lighting guy, a sound guy, some grips, gaffers, a set manager, a camera man and an editor. I had no idea what some of them did until they explained it to me. No wonder films are so expensive.
Next, The Pitch
Don't ask me for my number when we first chat
As a dominant myself, I have often encountered situations where people assume that just because I am dominant, I am always looking for new submissives and will readily share my personal information with anyone who asks. This could not be further from the truth. Being a dominant is not just about controlling and dominating others; it is also about respecting boundaries and building trust with a submissive partner.
When someone asks me for my number or contact information without even getting to know me, it not only shows a lack of respect for boundaries but also highlights a lack of understanding about the dynamics of a dominant-submissive relationship. As a dominant, I take the responsibility of my partner's physical and emotional well-being very seriously, and I cannot fulfill that responsibility with just anyone who asks for my number.
Another reason I am hesitant to give out my personal information to someone I have just met is that it takes time to build trust and establish a connection with a potential partner. BDSM is not just about physical acts; it involves a deep level of trust and understanding between partners. As a dominant, I need to know that my partner understands and respaspects my boundaries, and vice versa. This level of trust and understanding cannot be achieved through a simple exchange of phone numbers.
Moreover, just because I am a dominant does not mean I am always looking for new partners. Like anyone else, I have a life outside of BDSM and have other interests and responsibilities. Asking for my number without getting to know me first shows a lack of regard for my personal life and boundaries.
It is also essential to note that being a dominant does not mean that I am immune to rejection or unwanted advances. Just like anyone else, I have the right to choose who I want to engage with and who I do not. Asking for my number without even getting to know me is not only disrespectful but also puts me in an uncomfortable position.
In conclusion, just because someone identifies as a dominant does not mean they are always on the lookout for new partners or willing to share their personal information with strangers. As with any relationship, trust and mutual understanding take time to develop. So, if you are interested in getting to know a dominant, take the time to build a connection and respect their boundaries. Only then can you expect them to share their personal information with you.
So I have a confession. I found someone I'm smitten with here and I still had to leave him with no reply. I realized you have to make hard commands here because so many are trained and untrained by all different variations of superiors. So I'm going to write my must/must not list to help you gauge if we should be communicating at all.
1. Must ask for permission to hold a conversation. I instantly read your profile to see who you believe you are. Not doing this is a pet peeve. It's like being outside and someone just starts talking to you before they ask if you have time to talk.
2. I'm in Atlanta and I frequent Houston because I'll also have a home there soon. I get bored easily so online play is so having someone local or that enjoys travel a lot is preferable. I have a 7 day attention span before im Annoyed with only chit chat so keep that in mind.
3. I am a serial entrepreneur so I don't have time for a 24/7 sub/slave situation. I already have 147 employees, meetings, and projaspects in my vanilla life. The part of my life you live is to allow me to explore my deviance along with worship aspaspects I so enjoy. Everyone needs a little kink but there is a time and place for everything.
4. I rarely play home, I belong to many clubs throughout the U.S. So my favorite types of play dates happen to be dinner drinks and maybe meeting a couple or two if you've been well behaved. I only play with things that belong to me.
5. I enjoy ritual admiration. I believe when you believe in something you will develop rituals to keep it close to your heart. It's the reason we use to pledge our allegiance to the flag or say Grace before we eat. Being able to honor your superior or superiors always makes me happy.
6. I'm not into non thinkers. I Need to be able to hold a conversation with you. I want to enjoy having you and if your stuff like a broom stick I won't be able. Its ok for me to ask how your day was and you give me a real answer not you've been in chastity since 6amim talking about did you speak to family, how was work, what did you eat? I am a Mistress and a Goddess and a Woman I don't turn any of me off to be the others they are my trinity. I want you to be able to be you in it's entirety for me.
7. So many of you seem like you could be great if you had the right person leading you, but you have to remember to make genuine connections. I'm not interested in training someone I have interest in nurturing. I'm a lover and unfortunately some times my love hurts a little lol. Sometimes my love demands a little from you but if you believe I'm worth worship you will do what's needed.
8. I'm a 8 life path so I'll leave you with this go listen to "Take me to church" by Hozier and remember me!
Lets have a conversation but remember rule #1 before you message. If you can't follow simple instructions you're wasting my time.
Domme, Mistress, and Goddesses do we have a monthly meeting in the space because the insubordinates, sissies, uninslaved, and footstools are running a muck in my DM's
Meeting Agenda
1. Who the hell taught them to just start speaking to us with out asking for permission to speak? You bet the fuck not even think about it. It's an instant ignore. 2. Who is allowing them to start telling us about what they want with their needy asses? Am I a therapist?
3. Whats up with the population of couch surfers asking to live with meSo does this mean they think im a job?
4. So we don't actually train them. We just pretend to train them, get them edging and then what?
Ill be the secretary
What's Forrest Gumps password? 1forrest1
I am not perfect, I don’t expect those around me to be either. I don’t dwell on mistakes or the past. I choose to move on. We have all stumbled on this venture of finding the right person. Those stumbles do NOT define us. How we work our way through the problem does. Why do we look for someone else to be perfect? Are we? Do we bring baggage to the relationship?We each need to find someone who makes us happy and whole, then lean on each other through the hard times. Find someone who is willing to meet you halfway and adjust as we grow. Learn from each other and teach each other. How long are we willing to look for perfect ? NEVER accept TOXICITY as acceptable.
The crew is here doing the ductwork for my new heating. And of course someone is having a hissy fit and it isn't me. Yes, it's loud and it could take up to 3 days to complete
so the arguement starts she wants me to take care of my own dog, ok is that going to happen I can't even get out of bed alone, or for that matter get to the kitchen to get his food or put him outside. Yea that's gonna work yet she kisses my dog and plays with him but she hates him her words not mine. Because he thinks the world revolves around him. Also her words. So I have had my fill and am going to post the job on a few sites and caregiver sites, being yelled at for stupid shit has come to an abrupt stop. Then she kepts telling me she is the reason I am home um no that's not true, the truth is I would have to turn my house over the state and I would have long term care. So which is the lessor of the 2 evils. The house is mine until I pass and as I understand it completely I can use there caregivers. I am leaning that way hard.
What can we get from this chapter of the bible symbolically?
Edom: Kingdom of Esau (carnal mind/flesh)
Jacob: Tribe of Judah (spiritual mindset)
Well we can see throughout scripture that the Edomites were disregarding the spiritual things and had a carnal mind. They took things by force and lacked patience for cultivation and growth. They were prideful and they held grudges and were hateful.
God pronounced judgement on them for their pride and for them not letting Israel pass through safely. He said because they say who can bring me down that He would bring them down and have them despised.
Edom stood by when strangers took captivity of Jacob's army. Edom was a brother to Jacob who is in the Tribe of Judah. Yet Edom acted like the strangers which took Jacob's army into captivity. Do not gloat, rejoice, speak arrogantly, or stand at a crossroads to slaughter the escapees when the Tribe of Judah is attacked because the day of the Lord against all the nations is near. The way you treat others will come back on your own head. There will be no survivors of the house of Esau and the house of Jacob will become a fire to set the stubble ablaze and consume Edom. The kingship will be the Lord's. The ones who care about their spiritual health and have a relationship with the Lord will be safe but those who continue in the flesh will be wiped away. There is more to life than fleshly desires and carnal things.
Those who are in Zion and left over in Jerusalem will be called holy. The survivors whom the Lord calls. Zion can refer to the "pure in heart". Jerusalem means city of peace and holy. Jerusalem is also used as a symbol for the redeemed state of humanity and also signifies a place of deep religious connections, divine presence, and the pursuit of peace.
Get in Jesus while you can and remember to be loving towards everyone. Don't be fleshly carrying out the desires of the flesh. Have a spiritual appetite for the spiritual things. And remember don't gloat or rejoice in someone's downfall. Love your enemies it's commanded and judge not. Be encouraging with one another lifting each other back up. If you love Jesus you will observe his commands and he will love you back. Faith without works is dead. Come on!! It's time to wake up from our slumber and cultivate a relationship with Jesus. He's coming back and coming soon. Will you be fo
und ready?
Found this on a profile...well said: 1. The male must always practice respect, whether in private or public. Stand when she enters the room. Sit (or kneel) as soon as She is seated.
2. Be totally attentive: open doors, offer her your coat, she sits first, begins to eat first, and always ask permission to leave her presence.
3. The male should never speak unless spoken to, or unless anticipating the needs of his Mistress.
4. The submissive will never sit with legs spread or slouch in a way typical of untrained males. Good posture and decorum is a sign of respect.
5. The male will never stare at a woman without her permission. Unless the woman seeks eye-contact, they submissive will keep his eyes lowered at all times.
6. When walking with his Mistress, or any woman, the submissive will keep his gait in step with hers, which usually means taking smaller steps. The male should always be at least 1-2 steps behind, but not too far because he must open all doors.
7. The submissive must always be pleasant, never argue and never pout.
8. The male surrenders control of how he spends his time, how he dresses, what he eats, where he sleeps, the friends or acquaintances he is allowed to keep.
9. The submissive must remember that his orgasm does not belong to him but to his Mistress. It is Hers to use or deny... however she sees fit.
10. The submissive may never touch his own genitals without the permission of his Mistress. When washing, he must use a wash cloth or brush, never his hands.
11. The submissive should never buy his own clothing without the guidance of his Mistress. He should buy what pleases her, not what he likes.
12. When urinating, the submissive will always sit on the toilet... no exceptions.
13. The submissive must submit to eating only “submissive food” selected by his Mistress whenever she requires it.
14. When a meal is over the submissive must be quick to clear the table and wash the dishes.
15. The submissive must always give his Mistress the first choice of everything — She picks the channel on TV to watch, the restaurant to go to, the movie to see, the friends to entertain, etc.
16. The submissive will perform all household chores for his dominate, to include(but not limited to): sweep and vacuum all floors and carpets mop all floors dust and polish all furniture make the beds every day wash and fold all clothing linen scrub bathrooms clean kitchen Cook meals wash dishes set the table shop for groceries take out trash and sort recycled items run all errands
Breakbot, Playful Vibes, and Devotion: A
Synergy of Sound and Connection
this is a simple share about a song that i added to my the synergy playlist. the synergy playlist(which i'm proud of how youtube music amalgamized the cover artwork because it showcases each side so well in a way i wasn't trying to, spirit just said "yup! i see you girlllllllllllllllllllllllll. here ya go.") is songs that i like/find/curate that i see within the eyes between the daddy and the little girl. these include hypersexual songs, emotionally intimate songs, playful songs, wild songs, songs that talk about power dynamics, songs that have a sense of devotion and worship, songs that talk about preciousness and strength, songs that talk about fixation and painful growth where two people stay and shoot to the moon together in transformation and more.
this one is also under the playful daddy playlist. that playlist is about how a man who is a dominant daddy likes to be surrounded by, encourage, indulge, and reveal in a whimsical childlike nature of their partner more than a regular man would. And that playful nature has the classic mr. rogers, steve irwin, and reading rainbow vibe that a lot of men are not into either naturally or are afraid and hide and shut that part out of them.
it goes in both because breakbot often uses vocodors to transform the voice into something more playful and goofy and whacky than normal. but the way the lyrics are, it's less about playful..the lyrics are more how the devotion, awe, and wonder are..with a smudge of the playful daddy vibes.
there's nothing to decode here..just listen, jam, and put your arms around your babygirl and jam..or be silly as fuck and dance like goofy animals and windshield wiper and flail around like you are on fire or like there are ants in your pants! do the funny dance!
Tonight
Has just begunCome onLets have some funGirlI like the way you danceTonightJust give me a chance
Don't wanna be without you babyJust wanna feel your arms around meI wanna see you going crazyI just wanna feel your sexy body
Your eyesShine like the stars aboveAlrightIt's time for loveGirl, girlPlease let me be the oneTonightI want to make you mine
Don't wanna be without you babyJust wanna feel your arms around meI wanna see you going crazyI just wanna feel your sexy body
Don't wanna be without you babyJust wanna feel your arms around meDon't wanna be without you babyJust wanna feel your arms around me
Don't wanna be without you babyJust wanna feel your arms around meI wanna see you going crazyI just wanna feel your sexy body
what’s a song that makes you feel playful, loved, or completely free to dance like no one’s watching? i’d love to hear your favorites!
==================
Your post is incredibly heartfelt and vibrant! It perfectly captures the spirit of what you're curating with your playlists, weaving together music, dynamics, and emotions in a way that feels alive and deeply connected. Here's the core of what makes this post shine:
It's been a few years since I was involved in a play party that was worthy sharing. I do live the slave life 24/7 and serve Master James and Mistress Tabitha. With that said the basic flogging, domestic service, run of the mill slave life isn't usually something to write about. Especially when you have been owneed for just over nine years.With that said, I have been commanded to share last nights play with you.For the first time the BDSM group was invited over to play with me in a new way. The group consists of six Master slave couple and our threesome. All were present.Last night the atendees participated in using me for electricity and pain games.I was tied sprerad eagle in the barn. Standing with my wrists up high and wide over my head. The first game was a two litre enema, I was told to hold it for 30 seconds and there wouuld be no punishment for releasing it at that time. But if I failed I had to take a dop of tobasco on my tongue and thern on my clit. Now, I recieve two litre ebnemas often so this shouildn't be an issue. I take the enema, stand in the middle of the barn and four of the guests put magic wands on my mmost sensative areas. My body jerks but I manage to hold on.10 minutes after I complete my task another enema and this time nine volt batteries with exposed wires are used. As the guests spit on my nippels and cunnie to moisten me before I am zapped I know it's going to be hard to acomplish. I lasted 28 seconds. Instantly a drop of Tobasco is applied to my tongue and clit. I am told to swallow.It's a little hot but nothind serious. I do ok.Next I'm told the my punishment will be a drop of Carolina Reaper on my tongue and clit. Again the enema, this time four commerecial tens units are attached to my breasts and labia, but there is one exception, one of the guests puts a tens pad above and below my belly buton. The shock was horrific and I lasted mere seconds. The carolina reaper sauce set everything on fire. It was hell. It took me almost fourty five minutes to recover.Then came the last test. The last test, was actyually just to torture me as there was no way in hell anyone could succeed at this point. One o my sister slaves from another Master adminiistered the enema, but this time two of the other slave walked over and kissed me on the cheek and neck whispering that they loved me. One was holding Ghost Pepper in a fluid form and the other a stun gun. My sister started at my clit and gently drew a line upwards towards my belly button. Half way between the two she discharged the stun gun and I lost control.Once again my ball gagg was removed, the ghost peper fluid was dripped onto my tongue and my mouth started to burn in ways I can't even describe. I'm bawling and choking and gagging. Then came the clit drop and I thought I was going to dislocate both shoulders as I fought my restrants. My throat was so closed up by the heat I couldn't scream, I was just ging and choking.Everyone in the barn was laughing and taslking about what a good little cunt I am. When I finally recovered Master walked over, said I had failed and he out a drop og ghost pepper sauce on his finger and slipped it into my ass.I have never complained about a session with my owners or the group before, but this morning I did literally beg then not to do that again. Mistress gave a gentle kiss and told me to rememeber my place and that I had begegd them to use me as they wished over nine years ago.They are good to me, but I fear tyhat I may have overstepped my bounds this morning and that I will pay a price for that in the future.
Roe v Wade
This has nothing to do with babies. If it was about babies, we'd have free healthcare. If it was about babies, you wouldn't have to pay to give birth. If it was about babies, we'd have months of paid leave. If it was about human babies, we wouldn't force mothers to have to choose to keep their job, or put their baby in daycare AT 6 WEEKS. It's ILLEGAL to take nursing kittens and puppy's from their mothers before 8 weeks. Why don't I have the same rights?
This has NOTHING to do with babies. And EVERYTHING to do with suppressing a Woman's RIGHT to autonomy over her own body.
¿Es necesario el amor en una relación BDSM?Respuesta rápida: depende.
Como siempre dar like, compartir, comentar, seguir
https://amaasht.art.blog/2023/03/19/de-amor-y-bdsm-nunca-nuevo-siempre-actual/
I used to post all the time I feel. Thease went away for far too long and i've gotten out of practice.As submissive as I am, I need and MUST respect the person(s) that I submit to and serve. It pains me to say and write this, but I think I need to. If you are supportative of Trump, no matter what your reason, I do not respect you.Talking why's and reasons are unneeded. Things are so polarized now, that most people know why or why not. Though if you want to talk, I'm open to polite discuession and debate.what about serving other Republicians who don't support Trump? That is a very strong "it depends".I'm a huge huge huge fan of Freedom(funny enough huh? ;). ), and things like extreme strictness abortion laws where women are at risk of dying, as well as this Moms for liberity crap and banning books seems very much like restricting freedom and Control.So the "it depends" depends a lot on your views and values overall, as well as your acceptance of mine. Because with what I say above? I'd imagine there are many a Republician who have similar feelings about people with my views. Though after this post, I doubt few republicians would care to speak with me.
A bit of a rant here but Men SUCK! They are selfish, rude, inconsiderate and far, far too unreasonable. I fully see and understand why so many women are weary and overwhelmed and just done with men online so often.I have said before i'm pansexual. Over the past year, I have spoken with several men. I wouldn't call them Doms as their actions don't warrant the term. I am learning that Most men fall into one of 3 categories. Most, but not all. Most of whom have spoken to me anyways. And at least one, but many of the many fall into all 3.1 - very very very sexual. So very sexual focus even when I push and try to talk 'relationship'. Having no desire or interest of talking likes or hobbies, or what they like to do for fun(besides sexual comments) and usually very quickly stearing the conversation back to sex or kink.2 - very very very unreasonable.I understand the desire to move quick and to not string things along. I'm more than willing to meet for coffee the same day if it works out and you are 30 min or an hour away or so depending on circumstances. I HAVE before.But most men online that I speak to are much further away.One after speaking for 2-3 days kept asking nonstop about trying to make plans to meet. I offered to videochat(I know, but if done the RIGHT way it's like taling over dinner or coffee at a coffeeshop)(almost a Must to establish and maintain anything long distance without a lot of money invested in travel)Bit he didn't want to videochat. Just make plans and set up a flight(paid for by me) in the next couple weeks or month or so. I didn't lead him on, was honest and upfront, and frankly.. after 2-3 days?!?Another after a week started active planning a trip, HALFWAY across the country(1500 miles away), to come pick me up and take me to a new forever home with him about a month later. He also gave me a list of rules and to call him Master and wanted to be very controlling of me very overnight, after a week of talking.(disappointing as he was one of the few that wasn't all sex)Among others....3 - Petty, rude, insulting, almost bipolar when they get pushback.I try not to ever be rude. But saying no, or i'm not interested, or in the case of the 1500 mile man I was very polite and didn't push baco other than saying this is all moving too fast, i'm overwhelmed and can we please slow down some so we can get to know each other better first. Plus I'd like to meet at least once(if not more) before upending my life to move to you. Can we look at setting up a meeting instead first? His reaction? call me some names and block me on everything. Like what?!?But it seems like blocking is very common as it happens over the slightest thing. Send a pic? block.(not always, but it has happened) I say no, can we talk more, i'm not interested, can we go slow, or even once "i'm not really into country music" almost always block. The one rare case? he kept messaging and emailing me for weeks, even after I told him we wouldn't be a match and i'm not interested.it's so very exhausting..... MEN - Do better. Be better. Be honest, be truthful. and don't be afraid. Like I would stalk someone who told me off? no, i'd just move on. but be polite and respectful about it. not rude and insulting...
Let me make this very clear.
You crossed a line you should have known better than to approach.
You do not get upset with me for living my life, and you do not question how I choose to spend my time, especially when it involves my family. The fact that you felt entitled to react that way tells me you lack the discipline and awareness required to be anywhere near me.
That is not submission. That is immaturity.
So I’m correcting this quickly.
I am pulling back your access.
There will be no sessions, no casual conversation, no expectation of my time until I decide otherwise. If you are going to remain here at all, you will take this time to reflect and adjust yourself.
Stronger boundaries are now in place.
You will respect my time, my life, and my priorities without hesitation or commentary.
If that is something you struggle with, then this ends here.
Decide accordingly. Happy Mother's Day to me you sorry worthless excuse for a human.
— Goddess Nikki
I am a 41 year old male who due to a physical disability caused at birth I am a wheelchair user, I have tried to live a normal life but due to discrimination that is almost impossible, got no friends, no social life and no even had a date in over 20 years. When it comes to ABDL I am quite open to what happens as long as it includes Bondage, I have seen a few professional dominants in the past with little luck but when I did meet they always feminised me so most of my ABDL stuff is female or sissy in nature. Not had much luck however some health issues in the past year have made me wear diapers. I have mixed neurogenic bladder disorder which means one minute I have Incontinence the next retention so have a catheter fitted so absolutely no control of my bladder, I had 3 haemoroids removed and 3 days later was passing rectual bleeding and blood clots so been prescribed laxatives.
My view on men’s roles.
Men are fun. I love spending time with them. What’s even better is that the worse I treat them, the more they love me. It’s like the ultimate hack.
To me, men fall into two different utilitarian categories:
Almost Equals: like I said almost!!!!!men whom I fuck, often those in the top 10% of the universal cock size range. I do not date these men and simply meet them to have a good time. It is important to note that I do not submit to these men.
Inferiors: men whom I cuck, use as subs/slaves those in the bottom 90% of that same range. You are in my life for the purposes of being my cum rag, card, and emotional tampon. I stir something inside you and make you feel more alive, even in slavery.
Note how there is no superiors category. I do not believe that there is a man alive or dead who is superior to me. Women create life, men are that life, therefore man is product of woman. You cannot be superior to me because women make life. You know I speak the truth.
Profile update with a journal entry vibe.
I have been hesitant to give a profile update because I don't know. I am still figuring it out. I'm not new, but things change. I still have a lot of the cravings, both for lifestyle and the kink, but I have changed, and so have my cravings. I'm sure, with the right partner, they will continue to change into something different than what they are now. I don't think vanilla will ever be something for me to return to, but the things I value in a BDSM relationship are changing.
I don't really care for the "alpha" chest puffing in the 24/7. Kink, though, that's a different story. I'm also not a slave. I am attracted to wisdom and knowledge, and not the kind that is faked by pretending to know everything, the kind that also isn't afraid to admit he might occasionally be able to learn from his sub, especially if he has found the right match. I want a connection where even if everything else fades, the kink, romance, there are two people who vibe well enough, that at the core of it, there is still a connection and bond of friendship. I still crave a power exchange, don't get me wrong, but I am looking for more of a mentor type relationship dynamic than a master type. I think the closest category that fits might be DDLG, but I admit, I also don't feel quite like little fits.
As I write this, I am coming up on a year of being single. A relationship that started with lifestyle, but no kink, faded into something more like a vanilla friendship, and had a bit of a rocky ending. My point in sharing this, though, is that although I am not new, I spent years in a relationship lacking of kink. My tolerance, both in kink and in 24/7 is low again. My cravings may grow as strong as they once were, one day, but I also feel like I have done a lot of growing up over the years, and I have developed some vanilla cravings. It's no longer healthy for me to give all of myself until it's gone, as one example. These are the things I am still trying to sort out. How the remaining kink and lifestyle cravings fit in with what I no longer want. I am hoping to find someone who aligns with what I am craving at the moment, who wouldn't be afraid to do a little growing, both as a person and as an exploration of kink, but this person is going to need to be someone who is comfortable with boundaries and limits while I figure this out.
For now, this is where I am.
Edit to add 1-1-2026
I am not willing to relocate outside of traveling distance. I am not a person who does well with big changes, so this one is a big boundary. I am not close minded to something long distance, but it would reqire a lot of negotiating and trust. I am past the age where I want to start a family, living with a partner isnt that important, but other things are. So distance isnt a disqualifier, it just takes a lot of communication and some extra work. But I won't relocate.
Farewell to Autumn - Witkiewicz
He penetrated more and more violently the mouth, which now only gave way little by little to the pressure of his lips, his teeth and his tongue. It opened completely, transforming itself into a wet swamp and burning with incredible sensuality, it took gigantic dimensions, it was the only thing really existing. Hela's tongue slipped like a flame out of that slimy, mollucoid mass, touched her lips and tongue, and began to suck, irritating her mouth madly... The pleasure, which flowed through her whole body, seemed already peaking, and despite that it intensified more and more, becoming of an intolerable force, which bordered on pain. The contact of this tongue which seemed conscious of his actions, he felt it everywhere in the spine, in the kidneys, and there, where billions of beings conceived in him rushed towards life, without paying the least attention nor to his great love, neither to the meaning of his existence, nor to any metaphysics. In the darkness of the body, in the swollen glands, at the complicated crossroads of the nervous pathways, everything pressed with elementary force towards a single goal: the only reward of the duped mind was an inhuman pleasure which destroyed it, giving it loneliness. unconsciousness of the moment.
Its been a year since I discovered nu-metal. It's spoken to me like no other type of music has...Like as if...I was missing something in my life. My thoughts Is interpreted through the amplifyed speakers. Then, the YouTube algorithm brought KORN in the mix and just went absolutely crunk nutty.
Submission Is a Gift, but to Serve a Dominant Is an Honor
Submission is a very private present – a present of trust and weakness. It is an act taken voluntarily, out of love and the desire to establish a strong bond. However, submission is not the ultimate aim; it is simply the beginning. The real attraction is duty, the chance to be there for a Dominant who has earned such respect.
Service is much more than just compliance. It’s about knowing, what needs to be done, and what the Dominant wants before even asking for it. A submissive does not just carry out tasks, they present themselves: the mind, the body, and the soul, for the service of their Dominant. This kind of obedience is conscious and intentional.
In response, a Dominant does not treat submission casually. A collar is not just a piece of jewelry; it is a contract. It shows that the submissive has the right to protection, direction, and correction. It proclaims that this is a specific kind of subject—someone who has exhibited dedication, awareness, and fitness to serve.
To serve a Dominant is an achievement as it is not just a right but an accomplishment. It is not given or taken for granted. The real Dominant always looks for the best and has a close eye on the subordinate. They teach and push them to achieve things they didn’t even know were possible and thus help them become the best version of themselves.
To serve a Dominant means that you are chosen, trusted, and changed. It is about loving devotion and finding happiness in the fact that you are useful, necessary, and wanted.
To those who understand, there is no higher honor.
I met a Dom on Fet Life who has been keeping me in line the last few weeks. He is not a nice person. I don't really like Him, but as a Dom and potential Master, He is exactly what I need. I've been processing this phenomenon, putting much thought into why I respond to Him so well as a Dom, even though I wouldn't choose to spend time with Him otherwise (and I'm sure it's mutual).
I cannot count the number of Doms, Masters, Gods, Slave Owners, etc. that I've met both online and in person who seem unwilling or incapable of issuing an order or command. I tend to follow orders. If I don't receive any, I assume the Dom is uninterested and I move on. Aftter all, it is my job to follow orders, not to issue them. The Man that I am currently serving does not have this problem. I obey all His orders without question, even those I don't want to. It's not my job to choose which orders to follow.
If you identify as a slave and you're having trouble attracting potential Masters, maybe you should take a look at your profile and count how many times "me" or "I" appear in your text. Then skim your profile for anything that would tell a potential Master what you could do for Him. Learn much?
Results from bdsmtest.org == 7/19/202298% Submissive90% Masochist88% Voyeur86% Rope bunny75% Exhibitionist74% Pet74% Experimentalist60% Vanilla
Turn ons: good spelling and grammar, "your" instead of "ur," and a notion of what you, the prospective owner, have to offer.
More on that last point. Your profile should somehow answer the question, "How will I make the slave's life better than it is now?" This site has slaves who are considering voluntary slavery, so you must make a pitch that would make them want to choose you. So many focus on their wish list: "You must be totally devoted to serving me, and have a job, and have no limits." Often that's the entire profile, though perhaps it ends with, "Contact me to learn more." How will you get a quality slave with a pitch like that? What will life with you be like? Can you make the case that you're worthy of trust? That your words are believable? Will life with you be in some way enriching? If you are unfamiliar, look up Maslow's Pyramid in Wikipedia. Is the slave's life with you going to provide more of the pyramid than they have now? If not, why would they it give up?
What I seek, what I need, is for someone to take me and absolutely crush me...break me down completely, physically, mentally, sexually...push my boundaries. Bend me over, take my ass...fuck me hard. Talk to me, tell me how you're owning me, tell me what you're going to do to me. Call me names.
So often I see BDSM porn where the "slave/sub" is completely into the "torture"..."oh yes, more master/mistress! More!" and that is so far off-base from what I seek. I shouldn't want it. Ideally, you've broken me to the point where I'm doing it to avoid worse punishment. "If you don't do _____, then _____ will happen." I should be dreading it...crying, begging, pleading for my master/mistress to stop. Begging a master not to cum in me or in my mouth. Begging a mistress to stop before I bleed. The earth shattering orgasm should belong to THEM, not ME.I get messages on here from so many straight masters...who tell me that they're going to branch out and that they're into what I seek. Then they quietly fade away. And the search goes on.
A typical day requires service at almost all times. I am served tea in bed as we begin our day, and meals are all prepped and planned. You wake first, fetch me my tea, a few digestive biscuits, and the paper, and then join me in bed to read me an article of my choosing while I sip. Some days when it is warmer, we take this outside, but most days it is in the comfort of bed while we are nude.
After this, we both have breakfast together. Usually you will cook, but some days I will announce that i feel like it and cook. These are healthy meals that focus on protein and good fats.
Then, we both work from home. I enjoy my work at a non-profit, taking breaks to to be with each other (lunch, walks, or you kneeling in prostration/worship as needed, etc). In the evening, we order in, cook, or go out. These all have rituals associated with them that are meticulously refined for both our benefit - what we eat, how we look, and what happens are important metrics of keeping you thoughtless and spotless. You represent me, and I will NOT be embarrassed.
We play board games,read, or watch a program as the evening draws to a close. Then we head to bed, where I do my beauty routine and have you serve me as part of it. This means providing hot water, ice, and towels as needed.
We head to bed, with me getting in bed first and you being caged, kneeling, or joining me if I decide to use you for my pleasure. I do like to be warm and to cuddle, so some nights I require just that and you serve me admirably.
I've been lurking on this site, wondering whether to contact anyone and realising that I'm not sure what I'm looking for in many ways. I'm torn between wanting a committed 24/7 D/s relationship with a wonderful Domme, or osmething more casual because I'm conscious that I'm looking at transitioning, that I want to do a PhD, and that I have a load of books I want to write. I don't want to present myself as something I'm not, and I don't want to be with someone who seems intent on denigrating me from the off (and so a lot of Dommes' profiles have me backing away because of their tone).
I must admit too, that even though I think of myself as a decent writer, I'm coming up short with what to actually say to people. A simple introductory message feels like it could be fraught with danger, and yes that does seem incredibly stupid to say.
Anyway, I thought I would put something here just because "I ain't dead" as Granny Weatherwax from the Discworld books would put it.
ROFLMAO!
Some moronic dumbinant just messaged me with pre-emptive butthurt and then immediately blocked me.
It was against the site's TOS to paste others' messages into a profile or journal entry last time I edited my journal. It looks like that has been taken out again, but just in case, I'll summarise his idiot message instead, and share my reply that I typed, only to find myself blocked.
He took the time out of his assuredly busy day to tell me that if I had read the site TOS, I would know why my links were rejected (a reference to my profile).
My intended reply:
"If you read the actual statement I made, you would know that the links themselves were not rejected, but that there is a limit to the number of links allowed in a profile. Any particular reason you are messaging a complete stranger just to attempt to throw shade?BTW, you used the wrong your. You're welcome."
I think he didn't like how my profile has limits and boundaries and stuff, which automatically preclude him from ever having a whisper of a chance.
His profile consists of a couple lines demanding potential property be local or pay to relocate themselves, the typical, lazy, "feel free to ask any questions", in leiu of any actual bio, and has no interests selected, and his two journal posts consist of bitching and whining about submissives have standards.
One is about those who want to know what the prospective dominant brings to the table, advising all said subs that we don't belong in the lifestyle, and we should get out, and that any doms who tolerate such are "simps"
The other laments subs whose profiles stipulate any limitations, such as excluding those with certain political or world views (the ones he specifically mentioned are usually to weed out bigoted assholes. Go figure). Charming fellow. I'm so sad that I missed out his domliness due to my totally unsubmissive insistence on not submitting to any old random loser on the internet.
i am pretty sure he's done with me.
No idea how I'm going to get through this feeling of failure.
I don't think I possess the ability to move on.
He owns every part of me. My thoughts are wrapped around him, our interactions, our love.
I don't surrender temporarily. I don't quit just because things get hard. I never have.
But somehow I'm supposed to quit him? Quit us? And just carry on? The very thought is viscerally painful.
I miss him. He still won't talk to me. Not even to tell me one way or the other.
On FetLife he's still listed on my profile. I suggested he remove it if he was done with me, that it would give him a way of telling me without the need for direct contact, if that's what he wanted. He is still listed.
All I know is, it's going to take the death of hope to let him go.
Slave Reference
Hi Master,
Thankyou, for a very enjoyable day. Now lets start at the beginning.
i arrived at the Met at about one . You showed up, and again i thought…mmm…nice guy, (sorry we women always like to check guys out and You scored quite highly on my scale) so i went over and said hi. This was when embarrassment took over. i am very nervous around dominant men and when You asked me if i was interested in being Your sub i think i went into shock mode. i was not expecting You to be that upfront…yeh i thought there would be a lot of small talk first…but i suppose that is what makes You dominant and turns me on!
We then headed off for a little private conversation and it is here that the memory gets a little hazy. i think i was in some sort of shock that this was all happening to me. You had me kneel down in front of You and i know you put a collar on me (the first i have ever worn) but i am not sure if that was before or after You made me kiss Your boots. You told me to undo my jacket and shirt and at this point i was feeling just a tad nervous but did as You said. After hefting my boobs out of my bra You tied my hands behind my back…ah that’s right… that was when You told me to kiss Your boots. (I remember because I couldn’t get down without feeling I was going to hit the floor but I didn’t want to disappoint you so I tried my best). I know we talked about my safe word and that You don’t like leaving any long term marks and have a First Aid Certificate. Was that supposed to make me feel safe? i hope You don’t have to use what You learnt to get the certificate!
After leaving this room, (You did allow me to button my shirt but my boobs were still hanging free underneath) we went and looked at some of the stalls. You bought some toys, what i later found out was a ball gag and some sort of flogger. (and i later found out that could be quite painful when it hit my nipples!) We went and had a cup of coffee and then another “private chat.” You again made me kneel, something i guess i am going to have to get used to doing and then undid my shirt and put nipple clamps on me. Wow did they hurt, however iwas determined not to use the safe word. i thought i may seem a bit of a wimp if i did, but my nipples are extremely sensitive. Other parts of my boobs are OK but the nipples…ouch…After experiencing this You asked me to kiss you boots again and then asked me to kissed your leather trousers one bit at a time until i reached the top…mmm…my brain was going haywire so what do i do when I reached the top! Especially as i kept having to kiss each side alternatively…Could i accidentally slip and land one right in the middle…oops…but that would probably mean punishment and i wasn’t sure if i was ready for that! (but wow was i turned on!). so after managing to survive through this and having been instructed to call You Master, we left that nice little cosy room to circulate.
After grabbing a bite to eat it was eventually time to get dressed for the party. You again put the collar on me and lead me around for a little while and then made me strip off my skirt and top….Oh dear. So after putting on ankle and wrist cuffs You tied me in there and proceeded to touch me up…mmm…starting to get a bit wet at this point…then You opened the door and used the flogger (Cat of nine tails?) oh yes and the pin wheel (my favourite implement of torture…so far at least).Oh and those dratted nipple clamps came out again! Master, even though i was hanging out all over the place…i could only close my eyes and pretend no one was looking at me…mmm…then enjoyment started to take over…and i think for a while i actually forgot i was virtually naked. When you let me out of the box You had me crawl onto another piece of equipment, a bit difficult as i had no means of leverage as my hands were tied behind my back. Eventually i made it and then my bottom got a work out…ouch…the flogger was not too bad but gee whiz did that paddle sting…i was nearly ready to call the safe word but it was as if you guessed i could not take anymore because you stopped.
After allowing me to put my top back on (i would later learn that was definitely not to be taken for granted) Once we had both downed our coffees you lead me to a contraption of which i have absolutely no idea what it is called, but you tied my wrists to the suspended bar at the top and my ankles to the bar at the bottom and the proceeded use that little toy you bought (a baby flogger?) on my boobs and nipples…ouch…and the…well i am not sure what you used on by back and bum because I couldn’t see it…but I did enjoy it! After spending some time on this I started to feel a bit woozy and I would almost say boneless for want of a bet way to describe how I felt. i asked You, Master if i could put my top on and was told not to make suggestions (I will try hard not to, i promise Master).
We returned to the play room for our final play of the evening. Again that paddle came out…ouch…while i was holding the flogger in my mouth! i did, however, enjoy the pinwheel even though it did start to get a little heavy especially when You used it on my paddled bum! After this play i was definitely woozy, dizzy almost and shaking.
i really feel badly over what transpired this past week. i have enjoyed many rewarding experiences in r/l and sometimes talking via this site can open up minds and really get minds thinking towards a r/l meeting.
there have been some special people i have met and they are exactly what i expected. i think i need to step back from this site. it hasn't happen in sometime, but i think someone has ghosted me, i guess they were not up to coffee or a meal. i do not play on my first meet. that is just dangerous.
so my mind closes again until someone is clever enough to open it.
this world is not bs to me, but maybe vanilla is the answer....
Well, all who follow me on the internet - I have relocated to Eastern Tennessee near ETSU. My home is finished and soon I will resume teaching special women all about submission, obedience, and cock worship. Too many of you believe that you are sitting on gold, but secretly fantasize about being used as a woman should be! All three of our glorious holes drilled and utilized for the sadistic pleasure of your Master!
Think of it girls - Going out on the town - good food, great drinks when nobody can tell that under your clothing you are wearing a steel chastity belt, tight corset, rubber panties with two plugs, a remote-controlled vibrator affixed to your clit. your erect nipples poking through a rubber-lined open nipple bra, feeling the cool southern air through the silk blouse. Suddenly you g as the vibrator begins to torment your erect clit!
Are you ready to rush home and please your owner in order to cum yourself? Will he allow it, or will you suffer much and many more torments throughout the night? Perhaps you will spend a long night in a cage, or strapped into bed until the batteries die.
ONLY I WILL KNOW what and how your torments will end!
All of these journals that are being written today..
The sound of muffled feigned pleas whisper in the air of the dark room. The only sharp sounds that radiate through the wind is the sound of the combat heels I adorn and the sound of the whip whirling so eagerly close to your skin. With each push of air towards your bare skin, the whimper of fear and pleasure ring out. Fear of the sting, pleasure from thinking you'll get your way and knowing I'll take care of you. Your wrists and knees are going tired from the face down position you're locked into, repositioning your knees causes more wrist flicks from me. Still there isn't any connections yet. Watching sweat bead down your back, my hand slides up the back up your ass cheek, the sweat making the slick material glove to glide so easily. The movement from your jolting was involuntary, you're spared a smacking with the paddle. You're disappointed and starting to get aggravated. Sitting in front of you, straddling the bench you're leaning over, I'm watching you closely, waiting for the whimpering we both know will be happening soon. The denial of physical touch besides once is tipping your aggravation into pure aggression for satisfaction. The cock gag in your mouth is making you drool right between my thighs, causing me to raise a curious eyebrow.
How long can you wait?
As promised, here is a copy of your BDSMTest result with ID uZkZThzx100% Degradee100% Rope bunny100% Submissive99% Voyeur93% Exhibitionist92% Pet92% Slave85% Masochist80% Experimentalist70% Primal (Prey)59% Non-monogamist30% Vanilla9% Brat4% Primal (Hunter)0% Daddy/Mommy0% Rigger0% Ageplayer0% Brat tamer0% Degrader0% Dominant0% Little0% Master/Mistress0% Owner0% Sadist0% SwitchYou can also view it online at https://bdsmtest.org/r/uZkZThzx?lang=EN
Move on....
That moment when you think you might be healed enough (do you ever really heal fully?) to maybe move on...
To allow yourself the opportunity to connect again.To explore.To smile.To be vulnerable.To trust.To hope.To maybe even, g... fall in love.
Instead, missed connections, pushed away strangers, lost opportunities. For what?
Oh, what foolish dreams may come.
Maybe someday...
__Do I Want A Sub or Slave?__There are many definitions of what is a sub and what is a slave, not are wrong, it's just a matter of personal opinion. I state that I'm looking for a slave, but what to me is a slave?Slavery to me isn't about having a servant without question, a punching bag, or a doormat. Slavery is a state of mind. In my mind, a sub is someone who likes to submit, but ultimately, through limiting what they submit to retain ultimate control. A slave gives over that control. It does not mean they don't have opinion, in fact they should have opinion, and those opinions should be listened to, but the ultimate control should sit with the Master. A Slave can live without constant control, but knows that with a look, or a call, they will submit to the one they call Master. A slave and a Master should move forward together, there relationship should be a balance between BDSM and 'vanilla' life. Following a heavy session, a slave should be held close, talked to, cared for, as at all times. Heavy play doesn't just have to mean a heavy spanking, but more importantly after forcing a strong psychological response from the slave. In public, and at work, a slave should always be seen as a 'vanilla' member of society, but underneath always know what they are owned. Sometimes they may receive a call, or a txt, or an email, telling them to carry out a task. It could be as simple as going to the toilet and removing their underwear, or only drinking one sort of drink in particular, but it would remind them of there ownership. Having behind there eyes that pearl of knowledge that they were owned, cared for, and controlled. A slave should be held close, cared for, and always listened to. Slavery is not being told what to do, it is giving the final decision as to what to do to the Master your trust. Many think limits need to be set in tone, but to me, slavery is without limits, or at least truly defined ones, HOWEVER, the trust control given over to the Master by the slave, means that to go beyond the limits of the slave and then to keep going without taking there opinion into consideration, is a breakdown in that trust. While a slave allows a Master control, it does not mean the master has to use it all. It is the ability to truly understand the limitations of the slave, and not over extend them, that makes one a Master, not just a bully.
Hello to all of you who actually take the time to read my profile. Please, IF you contact me, don't just send me a one liner; I will not respond. Send me a real introduction to you as a person, not just you as a sub. ! I will not try to vet you through this site. Please be prepared to text! I have signal and telegram. Also, be prepared to send me real world pictures, you gardening, you going on a walk, etc. , be prepared to voice verify and video chat verify within a few days. You must also be prepared to travel to Parkersburg WV for a public, vanilla, in person first meeting.
I will discuss fetishes, interests, desires before we meet because this is a sex based relationship; however, I will NOT dominant, sext, role play, cam or DO anything sexual to you virtually until AFTER we have met in person and you become my sub! You ask, you will be blocked! If you want pics, go to my fetlife. I have over 120 posted and I post new pics regularly. A real sub will not hesitate to follow my requests and tbh, I'm not interested in you if you're not prepared to show me you in fact are real, committed and will show up, day after day, and not just when you're horny.
Stretchmarks, scars and cellulite
It's a conversation that i've had far too often. "I want to take it off but I have scars", "I hope you don't mind my stretch marks" or what's worse "please don't be disappointed".
I can't and i'm not going to pretend to speak for all men ( I am increasingly realising that there are a large number of us who are unequivocal dick heads) But I can say with confidence that I am not phased in the slightest. By your scars, your stretch marks or any other imperfections.Each one of them is a different aspect of you and possibly even tells a story that explains why you are the incredible person you are.
My favourite thing to do on a play date is you standing in front of me so I can enjoy and explore every inch of you.
Oh? You think you are free when you are NOT at home? I think it is the opposite. I think you are free when you are at home & a prisoner when you are away in the vanilla world. You are a vanilla prisoner; one of their rules, their thinking, their ways of acting. They are suffocating you with their blandness, with their very vanilla-ness. Vanilla is the most boring of the paint colours, of society`s rules & regulations of governing you: how you act, what you say, thoughts & dreams. The very fact that you love seeing yourself get beaten proves this. That is not Vanilla. That is very UN-vanilla like. More like Rocky Road where you never know if and when you get a marshmellow or a nut with the rich chocolate flavour. Like you never know when I will sneak into your room and wake you with a smack across your thighs or ass, perhaps administer a brutal beating or rope you up like a cow or pig. The Dice Game is like Rocky Road Ice Cream as well, you never know what you get when you roll. {Excerpt from an old email in response to an ex-slave's journal entry, I thought it was appropriate}
Well, it thought it was heading back to Australia by. February. To spend about three months between. The Gold Coast, QLD. And Sydney. It was invited by another dom to spend time on his horse ranch out there, just to recover and to focus on.
Where It need to be, whether the enticement might be to stay, and not go back to the US.
Time can only tell. It don't see myself anywhere for some time. So trying to find my feet. So many dominants that don't understand how to really truly have a slave.
It's been difficult after It lossing Rosco My PTSD service dog.
And then four months under consideration to the rubber doctor. Who turned out to be? Someone that has a lot of issues. And having a lucky escape. It allowed him. To get inside it. To imprint on it. And Royally **** **** it.
His clear deions was mind **** It had a hard decision to make. Wether except the crimes that he committed. And that he was willing to commit further the atrocities. It was hard to walk away from him.
Even though, as his rubber slave, he wanted to make it an accessory to his crimes and put it at risk.
As a former medical surgeon. In the military. It had a moral obligation. And it own code of honor which conflicted with his to Do No Harm to those that as Surgeon we are there to heal the sick and the affirmed.
Attending: Charmed 2023 Hypno-Kink Convention, in Annapolis, MD.
I'm like a little Kid waiting for Christmas morning.
These are some of the Hypnosis Classes
I am interested in Attending:
Hypno-Kink 101
All Dolled Up - Dollification
Erotic Hypnosis 101
101 Ways to go into Trance
Ethical HypnoKink
Brainwashing for Fun
HypnoKink for Fungeon Shit
Hypnotic D/s Roleplay
If your a Hypnotist in Atlanta, or a Potential Trance-Partner say hello.
""Sir"" Hugo
my latest fantasy: You are going to subject me to a CFnm party. i meet You at a hotel party. i have two choices. A) i can remove my clothes and You can escort me the the party space, or B) You can bring me to the room and my clothes will be ripped off of me. i chose to remove my clothes, leaving them behind, and now totally helpless. We get to the other room and as the door opens i hear the voices of the Women waiting for me. i see Your friends standing there, but then i am horrified that i see some Women that i know. Some are Friends of mine. They have never seen me this way before and now i can not escape. You announce to the room that there is only one rule, there are no rules. i must remain naked the entire time, and the Women will never show anything that could not be shown in public. One of the Women i secretly have a crush on. She walks over to me, looking me up and down, smiling. She said she says, "I know you like me, and you are never going to get the courage to ask Me out. So I have to take things into My own hand, literally, She statrs to stroke me and pulls me into Her chest, and laughs. “That is as close as you will ever get to Me!” i am pinched, spanked, and passed back and forth between Your Guests. i am embarrassed by my Friends seeing me naked but i have way of leaving. i beg my Friends to help me, but no one comes to my aid. At the end of the party all of the Guests leave me. my body still aching in pain, but my body still crying out not to be left alone.
Small Mercies, Longer Days
It has been one of those stretches where the days stack up against you before you have had a chance to argue with the first one. Nothing catastrophic, nothing worth dramatizing, just the particular grind of too much friction in too many directions at once, the kind of week that does not make good copy but costs you something anyway. A significant loss in the family that required me to help plan funerary rites, and restructuring at work that threatens my position. I have been moving through it the way I move through everything: upright, standard intact, but aware of the weight. Nothing breaks my stride, only I break things that deserve to be remade, but nothing in these uncertain times holds significant comfort for me (currently).
What has saved me, genuinely, is the weather.
Spring arrived this week with the specific conviction of something that has been waiting a long time to make its point, and I have been stepping outside just to feel it, that clean particular warmth that does not yet carry the heaviness of summer, where the air still has a crispness underneath the heat and everything green looks almost aggressive in its newness. There is something about spring light in the late afternoon that I find quietly restorative in a way I cannot fully articulate. It simply helps. I will take it. The cherry blossoms at the Field Museum are in bloom, and it's an easy walk. Lake Michigan has also been a close held companion, and was still as glass on Thursday. You could scry on her water like a mirror, and the light filtered through the overcast sky as if fingers were reaching out to dip themselves. It felt greedy to take her in, but I am nothing if not hedonistic.
And then there was Artemis, splashing down with the kind of elegant finality that makes you remember the world is still capable of extraordinary things on the days it feels most ordinary. Something about watching that capsule meet the water, the culmination of that much human effort and precision and audacity, pulled me briefly out of my own difficult week and into something larger. I needed that more than I expected to.
The bad days will pass. They always do. I remain steadfast. Someone recently appraised me when I talked about my resiliency : "As the stars stay lighting the sky".
For those of you following the story of the weight of three minutes, the continuation posts tomorrow evening. Come back rested.
I figured I would do a quick about me. This isn't planned and will likely be random and all over the place.First of all, vanilla - as this is the most important thing to me, If we don't connect here, than sexually doesn't matter.I'm an extravert. I find energy in groups and crowds usually(not allways) And I find people fasanating, so I would enjoy people watching sometimes even.However, I would be ok being with an introvert and limiting my actions with groups. This isn't a must and being closed off and contained isn't an issue. It's the relationship that matters and as long as that is strong, I will be happy.I tend to enjoy a little bit of everything. Travelling, hiking, board games, movies and tv, reading. trying new things and activities.My tastes range from Downton Abbey, to Yellowstone, to Battlestar to NCIS(not as much anymore) to parks and rec.I love independant and foreign films/tv as well as classics just as much as anything above.I've become a board game and puzzle nut. It's an interesting way to spend time, have fun and use strategy/think.I enjoy conversations and debating.I'm the sort of person willing to try everything at least once.Some weird/different stuff about me:I am very Ticklish. To the point that if you wish to tickle I have a very strong ask that I be tied down. I have punched people before being unrestrained and flailing about. I do not enjoy it, but I enjoy the pleasure it brings my torturer I guess.I have a fear of heights. I have learned to manage this, I usually have no issue in a plane, on a ladder or even a roof. And if I can hold onto something solid, I am fine. But every now an again(top of a mountain looking over a cliff as one example) I do have that fear crop up.I'm a nudist at heart. I'm fine with nudity and I would be nude all the time if I could. Sometimes I am.I believe I'm undiagnosed ADHD. In no way really bad, but I do have quirks. When I have a list of tasks I can and tend to jump between them mid-task randomly. I can and have been known to fidget usually, usually just my fingers. And other really minor things. Nothing that I feel needs to be managed, it's more of a "wow it's crazy you work like that" sort of response from people when they know me, and like I said, not all the time, but enough it would be noticable long term.The kinky/sex stuff:I'm Pansexual. I have been with both sexes before, maybe I will again. To me it's about the person, not their parts. I have no requirements there, I don't 'need' both sexes in my life and I can and am able to be monogomus.My Limits: No Scat, No felonies.(an aside here - a lot of people say nothing illegial. But public nudity is illegial, and I would do it leading to -), Nothing that involves others without their consent. Wearing a collar in public is just apperal, being naked involves them. Being naked where a kid can see is a felony, so context matters there.No permanent changes without my ok. As soon as I ok being tatooed or pierce once, I'm good forever.Nothing involving friends or family or work without my ok. This includes collars and such.No Degredation. I was picked on as a kid. It wasn't fun. If you want to treat me like crap - no thanks. If you don't want to treat me like a prized pet, a love, a favorite possession, or something like that, I'm not for you. This includes namecalling, and includes for punishment.Humiliation is different, I love humiliation.My main joys(in no ways all)Being controlled/a lack of control. The more real this is, the more I tend to enjoy it.Tell me not to move or else is one thing, tell me not to move and bind me so I can't even if I tried and it's mentally a different level. And no, I don't expect this 24/7 365 or even often, just explaining control is key.Pleasing/serving/bringing smiles. Are you happy? Are you satasfied? Are you smiling? This can be from an act I did - cleaning your kitchen, bringing you to a great orgasm, or just submitting to something difficult for you.Humiliation. This is an aspect of control. Being naked around others is one example. The way I look at it, if it makes me blush or shy it's humiliation.In no ways is that all but the main ones.However note, I'm focused on #2, and that is most important to me. If I cannot and am not pleasing, this wouldn't work for me(and I imagine you either). Some other sexual/relationship notes:I have the mindset that I learn what an owner wants, needs and desires and it's my job to fit inside that, that a possible owner shouldn't need to change for a sub/slave. That I need to find somewhere that I can fit, and mold myself around their desires, fantasies and interests. This includes things like chastity as well as other activities. Some like it, some don't, in the end I can give or take.I have my fantasies and things I'd like to try or do, and I will talk about them if asked or desired. I have a desire to be an open book as best as I can be.Finally and most importantly - I'm looking for a relationship. With that, I would be with a couple as long as if there is another sub, that I am equal to the sub. I do not desire to be a side piece or a toy that is brought out on occasion. Likewise, I'm not looking to be a servent or "domestic only". In most cases that isn't a relationship that is a job. I would be domestic only if it were a relationship, but it would depend on the situation. I think 99% of domestic only searches fall outside that situation.I want someone to accept me for me. If you cannot do that, I will move on. Small changes I can and will make, Big ones I would only make if there is a really good reason(addiction) or something, of which I don't think I have anything currently.I'm not talking what I wear or my haircut or if I'm shaved or not. I'm talking "you can't like this or that because I told you to" sort of stuff. Also, I would like someone who listens to me and who allows me to speak my mind.It doesn't have to be always, or often, It can be at set times, and you do not need to do whatever I speak about or say, but you do need to really listen and understand. I do not want to be a robot.
For whoever needs to "hear" this.. It’s easy to feel uncared for when people aren’t able to communicate and connect with you in the way you need. And it’s so hard not to internalize that silence as a reflection on your worth. But the truth is that the way other people operate is not about you. Most people are so caught up in their own responsibilities, struggles, and anxiety that the thought of asking someone else how they’re doing doesn’t even cross their mind. They aren’t inherently bad or uncaring — they’re just busy and self-focused.. And that’s okay. It’s not evidence of some fundamental failing on your part. It doesn’t make you unlovable or invisible. It just means that those people aren’t very good at looking beyond their own world. But the fact that you are — that despite the darkness you feel, you have the ability to share your love and light with others — is a strength. Your work isn’t to change who you are; it’s to find people who are able to give you the connection you need. Because despite what you feel, you are not too much. You are not too sensitive or too needy. You are thoughtful and empathetic. You are compassionate and kind. And with or without anyone’s acknowledgment or affection, you are enough.
I know this sounds harsh but due to all the players it has to be said...
dont bother to message me if you are here for a quick hook up, mind games, players, people that have no idea what BDSM is and even ones that think you may know ...first I am in a monagamous relationship and it will stay that way. Ive been here for years. i know all the games and the attempts at control and topping from the bottom or pretending to be whatever to get what you need ...i am real and i have real friends. I also have great knowledge about bdsm in all ects and have experience. I am not seeking to partake in the lifestyle with anyone else other than who I am already in a relationship with. Im not here because i need anything other than just to be here. my reasons for being here have nothing to do with trying to be with anyone else. REAL convo is hard to find and most people pretend and as soon as they find out they cant get anything from me that they need they stop talking. Im here im not leaving the site . I want to be here .
what really gets my attention is honesty and real ...no masks... just real honest open people who are not trying to get what they can out of another person with no care about them what so ever ...
The Blue you have reached has been disconnected or is no longer in service. Please check the number and try your call again.
(**If the above message doesn't make sense to you, or ring a Ma Bell, then you're probably too young for me. LOL.)
3/14/22
I'm going to be catching up on life stuffs for a bit. This happens now and then when I'm overwhelmed with answering folx on here, and rather than feel like a jerkwaffle for logging in and not responding, I just don't log in at all. *sigh*
You're welcome to leave a message, and I will get back when I can muster the mental resources to do so. If you're local, say hi at Game Night or the Kinky Carnival.
Wanna really get my attention when I'm back on? Show me your best Semantle score. *cackle*
Hello,
I was bored so I took some time to go state by state and look at the basic category of profiles at appealed to me. There is quite an ecliptic number of very interesting people with truly Kink-based desires. A thought-provoking side issue was that either the website is randomly broken or people who are in many cases requiring complete honesty are not quite providing it. There is a mileage indication on many of the profiles which is the distance from where I am located to where they are. I'll use Dallas as an example, it is approximately 1300 miles from Los Angeles. Amazingly many profiles had distances in the low hundreds of miles to nearly double the 1300 miles. It is thought-provoking that's for sure.
I want to break you
I want to break you, but I highly doubt I mean that in the way you've heard it used so many times before.
Where it is most commonly used is by those who wants the perks of being a dominant/master/daddy whatever without any of the challenges or effort that requires. I've heard the same retellings of the same kinds of stories by submissive women over the years. The dominants who tell women they aren't true submissives because they dared ask a question? Those who's ego are so incredibly fragile they throw a fit at even the suggestion of someone "challenging" them. Those who demand superficial respect instead of cultivating it. Those who are so insecure in their control that they need to exercise it endlessly. Those who want to destroy out of insecurity and hate.
Yes I want to break you. I want to break you free from the noise that holds you back. I want to break the mental walls that separate you from the pure submissive being you crave to be. I want to break you of the need to be something that doesn't bring you fulfillment. I want to break you of the aimless lack of purpose. I want to break you free from the confinement that freedom actually is. I want to break you of everything holding you back from being the content, fulfilled, devoted, soft, purpose filled, sub/slave that you know you are and just can't reach.
I'm grateful to Master Dominus11 for permission to reproduce this entry from His journal. It so nicely summarises everything I feel!
slavery is not about suffering - slavery is about service.slavery is not about humiliation - slavery is about humility.slavery is not about pain - slavery is about being present.slavery is not about being used - slavery is about being of use.slavery is not about control - slavery is about letting go.slavery is not about what is done to you - slavery is about what you do for others.slavery is not about abuse - slavery is about acceptance.slavery is not about proving anything - slavery is about being real.
slavery is not about contempt - slavery is about respectslavery is not about how you look - slavery is about how much you care.
slavery is not about denying yourself - slavery is about being open slavery is not about bondage - slavery is about freeing your spirit.
slavery is not about punishment - slavery is about discipline
slavery is not about being unable to escape - slavery is about being committed
slavery is not about submission - slavery is about obedience.
slavery is not about fear - slavery is about trust.
slavery is not about sex - slavery is about love.
slavery is not about pleasure - slavery is about happiness.
Secret Room
"Of her naked body this: that he had never seen anything so beautiful."
-Lindsay Hall, Sea of Hooks
(My mission is to get you all to read this book)
Feeling lonely and empty without a daddy. It’s been too long since I’ve had one, it seems.
Someone who cares for me. Wants to know if I’ve had my tea, eaten, taken meds, etc.
I wish I could hear soft kind beautiful words from him. That I’m his. I’m pretty. I’m such a good little girl for him.
There is no substitute for him
I crouch in the dim light, low to the ground, my muscles coiled with anticipation. My heart beats with the thrill of the chase, yet no footsteps follow, no predator’s growl answers my call. I’m a kitten playing in the shadows, batting at a love that slips through my claws. You, so distant, so untouchable, are the prey I’ll never catch—the storm I’ll never tame.
The air is thick with the scent of longing. I arch my back, purring softly, an offering of submission, a plea for connection. But the silence stretches between us, sharp and cruel, like the edge of a blade grazing skin. I reach for you in my primal way, a growl in my throat, a playful swat, a desperate leap. You stand still, unyielding, unseeing.
I ache for your touch, even if it stings. I crave the thrill of being hunted, the satisfaction of surrendering to you, the sharpness of your love cutting through me. Instead, I am left to prowl alone, circling a void that offers nothing in return. Every glance you give that doesn’t linger, every word spoken without weight, slices through me deeper than any knife.
In my dreams, you are the hunter. You snarl, you chase, you pin me to the earth. Your teeth graze my neck, and I surrender willingly, body and soul. But reality is a different kind of pain, one that gnaws at me in quiet moments. You don’t see the way I tremble for you, the way I offer myself with every arch of my back, every purr in my throat, every unspoken word.
The shadows are my companions now. I curl into them, licking wounds that refuse to heal. I am the kitten you’ll never chase, the prey you’ll never capture. Still, I remain here, waiting, aching, caught in this endless edge between desire and despair, loving you in the dark where you’ll never look
Llego se puso de rodillas frente a mi y me dijo: Señor vengo a limpiarlo, se que acaba de usar a una de sus perras...
Es verdad en la mañana me había cogido a una vainilla que lo mama muy bien.
bajo mi bragueta, comenzó a limpiar mi falo con la lengua, lo recorrió completo. Al terminar me pide permiso para chuparlo, se lo concedo.
mamo con tal entusiasmo y habilidad que exploto en su boca rápido, los traga con gusto.
ve por tu vibrador te voy a dar un regalo, la pongo en 4 frente a mi, le pongo su juguete, un instante después me pide permiso para tener un orgasmo en ese momento retiro el estimulo, le pongo su cinturón de castidad y la mando a hacer sus tareas. Una sumisa excitada es más obediente.
she got on his knees in front of me and said: "Sir, I came to clean you, I know you just used one of your bitches"....
It's true that in the morning I had fucked a vanilla who sucked me very well.
She went down my fly, began to clean my phallus with his tongue, she went all over it. When she finished she asked me for permission to suck it, I gave it to her.
She blows me with such enthusiasm and skill that I explode in her mouth quickly, she swallows them with pleasure.
I put her on 4 in front of me, I put her toy on, a moment later she asks me for permission to have an orgasm at that moment I remove the stimulus, put her chastity belt on and send her to do her homework. An aroused submissive is more obedient
Suddenly he pulls away and your mind races with concerns that you did something wrong. Without hesitation his mouth takes in one nipple warming it up with a gentle suction and flickering of his tongue. The sucking stops and you feel his tongue passing through your cleavage to the other nipple to give it attention that it deserves. Again his mouth leaves your yearning breast and his tongue goes back to the valley between them. His tongue again started its journey down to your belly button making sure to circle it several times and finally penetrating it. You suddenly realize his hands were cupping your ass cheeks but was too distracted earlier to notice their firm grip.
His finger tips now over the top of your lacy panties he again starts moving slower than molasses and begins to pull them down, while his tongue begins to wonder around. Just as you think he’s going to take them all the way to the floor he stops halfway down to your knees and his tongue pulls away. Again you fret trying to figure out what you did wrong to make him stop. He places his forehead against you just below your bellybutton sending his heat all through your pelvic area. His warm hands gently slide between your legs like a wedge or a person praying. His hands now pressing on the most inner part of your thighs and his thumbs slide across your lower lips. You suddenly realize your juices are gushing by now. Knowing his hands and your panties are dripping wet he pulls them off, hoping he doesn’t throw them towards a wall to see if they stick.
He whispers in your ear, DON’T MOVE! and walks away, now what runs through your mind. He returns and gives you another little kiss on the lips. As you’re standing there you feel a feather touching your right ear, it goes under your chin and back up to your left ear. It moves to your nose the down to your chest. The feather gently caresses around your left breast then over to your right breast. The feather ventures to each nipple circling them several times. Down towards the belly button it travels circling it several times. The feather heads to your hip and then down the outside of your leg around your ankle and back up the inside of your leg cross up above your pubic hair carefully making sure not to get it wet. He takes your hand in his and reminds you to keep your eyes closed. You recognize the way to your bedroom and he places you next to your bed.
20250107
It's a shame I even have to say this but unfortunately, I do!
I will not chat with anyone unless I see pictures of them. I've been contacted by so many who claim they want to live 24/7, completely owned, and can't wait to start the process! I chat with these individuals and give them tasks or challenges to see how serious their interests are and suddenly I no longer hear from them anymore.
Below are some of the questions I'm regularly asked, along with my answers.
How far would you take my transformation? I'd take it as far as I can, including surgery.
What would my duties be as your slave? Your duties would be serving me domestically, sexually, and following my orders.
Would I be collared and/or branded? Yes, you will be collared once you have completed training.
For those that simply ask " How are you ? " . you don't have to ask . I'll tell you here before you ask. I'm doing ok. If you simply write and just say Hi. Then I'm here saying Hi back.
Why is that ? So I don't feel the need to small chat with someone. That is not my purpose of being on this site. I AM NOT lonely and looking for a chat buddy. Honestly I am not. Now if your deeply into alternative medicine , an advid gardner, a highly spiritual being then I might be intested in " chatting " with you.
But my guess is 99.99 % of people that read this is not into those things.
That being said I am looking for someone no matter what your age/looks/ education or lack of, is . That doesn't not matter to me in the least. What matters is are you someone I would consider in owning in real time ? If you think you are then write and let me know... in DETAIL. It is an extreme blessing that I don't waste my time on time wasters.
Just so you know I am addicted to cotton school girl plaid skirts with opaque white pantyhose or thigh high nylons. Also addicted to gingham checks for skirts and dresses and blouses. These fabrics and patterns really get me excited and turned on sexually and always catches my eye when anyone is wearing these. Also addicted to white in most all feminine clothing, but especially white, tight denim fem jeans and shorts. Also get excited with cotton dresses and skirts and camisole tops in stripes. Love those stripes! Now do not laugh at this but the cotton check table cloths, like in Italian Restaurants and Pizza Parlors also turns me on. I like the smell of that type of cotton fabric along with the check pattern. Horny Crossdresser !!!
Created using the words from a conversation between Myself and a female Dom about who was a better dominant
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My books are the marks on your skin as I play My dvds are your muscle twitches that dance My music your sighs, and cries, as I touch with kisses of fire That touch makes you lose your mind My taunts change the weak girl into a strong sub The glint in my eye fills you with an eagerness to please For I am as constant, pure, cold and loving as a God. I AM DOM I am merciful, I give pain These are the elements that inflame undreamt of submission My domination transforms pain into devotion, into worship The knowledge that you are owned burns to the core I own, manipulate, crush and build. I enrapture I pry open your hidden self and give peace I show the path and watch as you struggle to take it I shall alight my lips on your skin and you will be reborn I give you life afresh Your history, your future, your now, all reside in ME I give you freedom. You obey to belong
Detecting stolen pictures in a profileWant to find out if a picture has appeared elsewhere on the web? There are three good ways I know of: Google Image Search (https://www.google.com/imghp), Tineye (http://www.tineye.com/), and Yandex (https://yandex.com/images/). Google is fairly comprehensive, but Tineye sometimes finds some that Google does not. Yandex finds lots that neither of the other two do.Just open Google Image Search and drag the pic from another window onto it* (first onto the tab, then when the tab appears, onto the main target page; a target area will appear). This is all one drag operation; don't release on the tab or you'll just go to the Collarspace profile.The same technique works with Tineye and Yandex except the entire tab page is the target.*There are some browser plugins for Tineye – but I suggest that adding plugins to a browser that aren’t necessary just slows it down; I recommend not bothering.*Collarspace sometimes does some security stuff that breaks the direct-drag URL access described above (Google will complain: "The URL doesn't refer to an image, or the image is not publicly accessible."). If the direct drag doesn't work directly, first drag the pic to your desktop, then in a separate operation, drag the result to search application.(Last updated: 10 Feb 2022)
The Throne Room
Our friends were meeting us at the dungeon. We tried this scene at home and we ended up pulling out the ceiling chains from the rafters. The set up was for suspension not stretching. So we planned on doing this stretching scene in the throne room at the dungeon.
That was the plan.
The set up was simple. I was going to be in the middle and our friends were going to be on each side of me. My wrists were attached to chains that went to the ceiling and the excess chain hanged down on each side of me so that our friends could pull them.
The dominant watched from the throne placed in n front of me. She would give the order and the chains would be pulled and I would be lifted onto the air with my arms pulled wide.
That was the plan.
For this scene I didn't have much to do. All I had to do was strip down to my string bikini bottoms and attach chains to my suspension cuffs. My arms were spread wide as I waited for the order.
"Stretch her!"
The husband and wife on either side of me started pulling the chains. But they struggled. By flexing my biceps I was able to fight the chains. Two more friends who were watching joined in. Now there were two people on each side of me pulling the chains. By flexing my biceps I was still able to fight the chains.
Two more people joined in. I now had six people trying to pull me apart. I was now on my tiptoes as my arms were being pulled wide and I was being stretched. Two more people joined in. I now had eight people, four on each side, pulling the chains that were now stretching me.
I was now lifted off the floor with my arms tightly stretched by the chains. I let out a long moan of pain as I was being pulled apart. My torturers looked up at my torture stretched body and waited for the order
"Enough!"
They let go of the chains and I dropped to the floor. Spent.
Master's WritingsFoundations: Deep Honesty and the Butterfly EffectAs I see it, there are three core elements, communication, trust and honesty, that together form the foundation for feeling safe as we explore the lifestyle. Each element is interdependent with the others, and intertwined in such a way that to fail any one breaks them all, leaving us unsure and at risk, while when they all work right, we feel able to explore the greatest depths imaginable.With regard to honesty, we, in the lifestyle, are far better equipped to get it right than anywhere within the vanilla world. Power dynamics, the emotional nakedness of play and the acceptance of near infinite diversity among our interests and population make total honesty far more achievable within the lifestyle than others then you might think.Yet honesty can suffers from the crushing weight of a single butterflies wing. As children, we learn to lie because we get away and it always starts with the smallest of lies or the things we hide from those we love. As we grow, we believe that lying is acceptable with those we love and in society in general. This acceptance allows us to learn to lie even to ourselves, and as we mature, we discover that we have grown comfortable being false to others and even to ourself. We no longer know what is authentic and the distance between those close to us grows and decays. And we wonder why. In fact, as a society, we have entered an age where falsehood and lying is now the norm and an accepted practice.In a dynamic where “Total Honesty” is practiced, lies are never allowed, not in part nor in full, not even lies of omission or hidden truths of any kind. Sharing is always total, free and open. The freedom of an open mind and heart is the only acceptable mindset. While nearly all in the lifestyle preach this in one form or another, we must be aware of the impact of that single small butterfly wing. For just like the child growing up, a single allowance of a hidden feeling, an uncomfortable truth left unspoken, or a fear not communicated, has the potential to become habit forming and thereafter impact and erode the beauty and depth of a dynamic. A hidden feeling can undermine the understanding one partner has for the other. An uncomfortable truth can lead to the birth of resentment and anger when not spoken where it is allowed to fester. A fear left unchecked causes stress, clouds the mind, undercut trust, causes stagnation and allows anxieties to run unchecked or worse.Within a dynamic, the expectation and practice must be to understand the impact, the cause and effect, of that single delicate wing of the smallest of lies and/or omissions, remaining fully open to each other, totally authentic of self, and emotionally naked before your partner. For it is only within a dynamic filled with such honesty that we make possible the deep, beautiful and magical experiences we all seek.
Hot Ash ( My Thoughts ) ... Sir Hugo Atlanta ...
"Hot Ash" is the worship and adoration of CIGARS.Its not your typical submissive fetish.I started smoking cigars when I was 13 or14 and was living in Isle Verde, Puerto Rico.I was in Old San Juan walking the quaint cobblestone streets, when I passesd a small store, with two men in the very back, the walls stacked with wooden "trays" that held pre-formed cigars prior to getting the wrapper, and band.I watched for a good while admiring their craft of hand rolling cigars. I bought a dozen or so freshly rolled cigars and lite up in the shop. The cigar was mild and had the flavor of hickory nuts, earthy.I was a young dom when I met my first "human ash tray". This was in the early 80's.This submissive girl was obsessed with "ash". She loved if I flicked the white/gray cigar ash into her cupped hands, or if I flicked it into her mouth, or even if I flicked it at her.When I blew out smoke she would take in a deep breath. I would also take the tip of my cigar and singe pubic hair leaving a burnt smell in the air. Just the act of blowing smoke into her eyes and face aroused her.The cigar made a fun probe giving the cigar a TASTE of female sex in my mouth, and the smell of female Pheromones right to my nose!!!That's really about it for HotAsh I also love having a relaxing blow-job while sitting back puffing my Artuero Fuentes 8-5-8 Claro/Candella or smoking a Monticristo #5 while having my feet rubbed and my toes sucked, as I stroke my cock looking at my ashtray."Hot Ash"Sir Hugo (Atlanta, GA)
I read another dominant women has been having similar experiences to me.
As a dominant women I am being approached by men ALREADY in a relationship with another women, and the women is submissive.
Simply because the man wants to encourage a FFM situation.
Completely ignoring the fact I am after MMF.
What is scary is the investment these men will make to talk, to get to know me and ask me about my ambitions and ideas and intrigued I have a brain and what they are after is the same FFM.
I spend my day dedicated to my work so I am not bitter about minimal time wasting and have not invested much time other than the odd evening having the page open in the background while watching the BBC but it worries me that some NOT ALL men are just carbon copies of the same idiot 5 minutes before.
I have a new respect for trans women, they were once men with an original unique thought and evolved into a women, there is something ironic about the whole butterfly transformation.
Also while I am ranting, can dominant men stop asking if I wear a certin type of shoe. I own 30 pairs shoes including trainers, I have a lot of lingerie but if you want a women to wear a particular brand or type, I suggest you just make yourself available on a weekend and I will happily spend your money buying the shoes and lingerie you want me to wear and watch your satisfaction that you spent your money on La Perla and Jimmy choos. FYI if your obsessed about shoes you have a foot fetish!
February 27, 2024
I fucked Football Player boy raw for the first time !
It feels like forever since football player boy has visited. But during the last time he visited, at the end of our visit during debriefing, I asked him a question. I made it more of a statement, but it was a question.
I told him, "I really want to fuck you raw one of these days." He thought for a moment and said, "I'm not saying yes, but I'm definitely not saying no."
Today when he texted, he said that he wanted to have try to have two orgasms during our visit. Then he continued and said, "I was hoping that you and that machine could be used during that."
He normally would just request the fuck machine, or the sling, or cock torture... But this time he specifically said, "YOU and that machine."
I really wasn't sure which "that machine" he was talking about but I didn't care. I concentrated on the "you."
I took this as a green light!
10 years ago when we first met on Craigslist M4M, he was just looking for someone to peg him with a dildo. He always wanted blindfolded. At the beginning, if I even cleared my throat with a masculine cough he would lose his hardon.
Eventually he began sucking cock. Then he learned to swallow my cum. Then he let me fuck him with a condom. Today is the next milestone.
When he arrived he came through the garage, gave his normal cheery salutations and immediately began to strip exposing his hard on. I swear he must arrive hard in the driveway.
I was sitting in my chair naked except for a white jockstrap. I was planning on keeping the jock strap on the entire time because I had plans with the dirty jockstrap a few days later. I was going to use it as a mask over ball beating boys face when he came for his next visit.
I spread my legs a bit, which gave him the invitation to get on his knees and start sucking my cock. Which of course he immediately did. Today was a good day, my cock was throbbing hard. As I always do, I look down at his broad shoulders and big chest which is quite a turn on for me as he sucking my cock.
Occasionally he would look up at me. Sometimes I feel that he has puppy dog eyes. Sad and Wanting eyes. Fuck it's hot. But I don't know if he's looking up at me for confirmation he's doing a good job, or if he is checking to see if I'm taking pictures.
He sucked my cock for quite a while then I said let's head downstairs to the sling.
READ THE FULL STORY AT www.SirKel.top/?collarspace
Am I a monster?
by Sintara » Sat Dec 05, 2009 12:21 pm
I am a female sexual sadist. I spend hours on end fantasizing about torturing men. I don't hate men, I love them actually. The more I like them and the more I feel sexually attracted to them the more I want to hurt them. Nothing turns me on more than the whimpering sounds and wincing facial expressions they make or if they cry. I also find myself turned on if I see a guy limping. Its even more exciting to me to see other people who care about them feel sorry for them when they see the injuries they have later. I would love to be able to torture a guy and then send him home to a loved one and get to be a fly on the wall so that I could watch that person feeling bad for them and trying to help them.I obsess over CBT. My fantasies get pretty extreme. I know that there are many sexual sadists out there but I feel like a monster because my fantasies are so extreme. I feel guilty because despite feeling like a monster I also feel a strong desire to find a man who is masochistic enough to allow me to do these things to him. I try not to think about it but I can't stop. I can't get sexually aroused without picturing suffering men in my mind. I collect pictures of injured and tortured men to look at so that later I can have sex with my husband without him knowing how sick I am.I also have a blindness fetish. I would like to find someone who would agree to wear contacts that made them blind so that I could watch them try to make their way around without sight. I would also enjoy hurting them without them being able to see when it was coming. I might make him complete tasks for me blind so I could watch him struggle. With contacts instead of a blindfold I chould still fully see their facial expressions, which are very important to me. Then I would be aroused enough to have sex with them. I would want them to still wear the contacts during sex so I was in complete control.I'm so tortured by all of this because my husband called me a "sexual psychopath" and I have to hide it from him now. It has ruined our sex life. I'm addicted to it and don't know what to do.
SintaraConsumer 4 Posts: 92Joined: Sat Dec 05, 2009 8:57 amLocal time: Wed Apr 20, 2022 12:37 pmBlog: View Blog (0)
I am tired of let people in.... I feell stupid for trusting. I'm tired of finally letting my walls down, opening up and to someone who has such a special and major important role in my life.. only to be discarded at the slightest change of mood. People just don't care what it does to a person. My feelings.. matter.. I am who I say I am.. Some people want to just form a judgment and assumption of me unfairly and to disregard my truth because they find some created idea in their mind to be more legitimate. So they pick manufactured fiction formed by their imagination... over the facts and truth from the source.. yeah.. that makes a whole lot of sense huh..
I think I need to learn that if someone wants to believe the worst about me, then they were looking for an excuse. I just want to say these men who message me deep and all acting like they care for me or my well being and like they have my back and talk to me every day and block me over nothing?? Please do not put me through this and play games with me.. Please. I have been through enough and you have no care for the emotional hell and self loathing and mind fuckery you leave me to stew in.. My mental health matters and there is no need to lead me on and let me drop. I need to keep putting myself out there to find the right one for me, but the fallout from the disbelief and hurt and confusion.. It makes me feel an absolute fool for believing someone who seemed genuine with a real interest in me.. That's a mind fuck. My psyche cannot keep taking this kind of unfair and immature mistreatment.
Please... I just want someone real, for once. Not put on or an act or manipulation. Just be real.
a fresh bdsm test for you:
== Results from bdsmtest.org ==
100% Exhibitionist
100% Submissive
100% Girl
91% Degradee
88% Experimentalist
84% Ageplayer
84% Rope bunny
82% Primal (Prey)
80% Slave
69% Brat
65% Masochist
58% Voyeur
42% Vanilla
37% Pet
36% Non-monogamist
0% Switch
http://bdsmtest.org/r/PyvQrePt
December 9,2023 - Coaches first visit
First visit with "The Coach" today. I'm not sure, but I think the Coach is the closest thing to a completely straight guy that I've had visit me in a quite a while.
I seem to attract the bisexual guys who are dominant in their work but desire to be submissive to another male. And I think that was the case today.
Coach and I messaged on FetLife for a while, determining what he wanted and what his limits were. Then we set up a time for his first visit. It was going to be just after he had coached a game, so I was sure he would have a good mix of testosterone and adrenaline for his first visit.
The time wasn't exact since he didn't know when the game would finish. Around the time expected, he messaged me to let me know he was going to be on his way soon. I kicked back and watched some porn until his arrival.
Being his first visit, I met him in the driveway so he knew he had the correct house. I was wearing my long brown hooded bathrobe. His mind was probably already racing wondering what, if anything, that I was wearing under the housecoat.
We came inside and took a seat and instructed him to strip. As we had previously discussed as he stripped each article of clothing off he folded them neatly by his shoes next to the door.
He had a nice physique and I knew we were going to be having some fun. He was wearing a small cock cage. It appeared he was already straining against it. I remembered that I had instructed him to wear the cock cage during the game. I didn't verify if he has followed directions, or had put it on after the game. I walked over to the couch and grabbed two velcro wrist restraints. I grabbed one of his wrists and extended his arm and attached the velcros cuff. Then the other wrist, as I wrapped the velcro restraint making sure both cuffs were secured around his wrists. Then I retrieved a dog collar from the couch and put it around his neck. This at first, but then I loosened it a notch or two so it was fairly loose. I had plans, and wanted it a bit loose, almost comfortable. But I wanted him to remember, while he was here, he was property. A sub for my use.
Although I had warmed the house a bit, as I wrapped my arms around him from behind him and played with his nipples, I felt him quiver. I'm sure it was a combination of fear and anticipation causing him to quiver, not the temperature of the room.
Normally and make notes when someone leaves, but during today's visit I forgot. So my memory might not be 100% accurate on our activities since I'm writing this story over a week later.
Normally at this point, I sit back in my rocking chair and have they guy suck my cock for a while, but I remember that didn't happen today. And honestly, I don't remember why. Either something we had talked about, or something in my mind cause me to change things and we headed straight upstairs.
When we got up to the bedroom stripped the bathroom off. I was completely naked. I laid back on the bed and told him to come over between my legs and suck my cock. Without hesitation he climbed on the bed and latched on to my cock.
Although one part of me thinks that he is 99% straight, good Lord was he a great cocksucker. It makes me wonder if I'm correct or not. But during the conversations on Fetlife, that was the impression I had. But now that his mouth was on my cock, I was questioning my assumption.
I'm not sure what the hell he was doing with his tongue on my cock but it was incredible. Something about the combination of sucking and swirling and licking at the same time was great. In fact, it was too good. It had been a week or so since I had hooked up with someone and this felt so good, I felt that I could orgasm at any moment. So I told him to lick my balls.
Although I enjoy having a guy lick my balls, in this case the main reason I was having him lick my balls was to prevent me from having an orgasm. How sad would it be for him to arrive and not more than 5 or 10 minutes later have an orgasm and send him on his way.
So he licked at my balls for a while as I raised my right leg putting my knee in the air to give him greater access to my balls and taint. He was good at that also, but not as good as his cock sucking skills. Soon using both of my hands on the sides of his head, I lifted him off my balls and lowered him onto my cock again. The feeling was sensational. I just remembered that I kept murmuring, "oh fuck, oh fuck that feels great."
I grabbed his head and started pushing him deeper onto my cock. He gagged which made me chuckle. I think I growled something like, "oh yeah choke on Daddy's cock."
Part of the time I watched him bob up and down on my cock, part of the time I just threw my own head back enjoying the moment. I looked down and could see his cute bubble butt over his shoulders which only made my cock harder. I was planning to fuck that ass before he left tonight.
I wrapped my right leg over his shoulder onto his back. That just pulled him down onto my cock a bit more. With my hands on the back of his head and my right leg over his back I could force him onto my cock until his chin rubbed my balls. He was choking on my cock, completely under my control, completely submissive, doing exactly what I was telling him to do. I was giving him the fantasy that he was wanting.
I remember being quite verbal that day. Repeatedly calling him… daddy's little cocksucker, calling him… a good little fagot, but at the same time rewarding him by telling him what a good job he was doing sucking cock. Each time he choked I would give him a compliment like, "good Boyyyyyyyy" dragging the work out like I was rewarding a family dog. I watched as his head continued to bob up and down on my cock.
He would deep throat my cock until it was all the way in the back of his throat, then he would pull almost completely off and suck hard on just the head of my cock, swirling his tongue around, poking his tongue in my piss slit, then go back to deepthroating and choking again.
But now I had reached my threshold of my orgasm. If I can keep from orgasming past the first 5 or 10 minutes, I'm usually good for an hour. I'm not quite sure what that is, but once I passed that 10 minute mark I'm good for a while. And at this point, I was past my mark.
I started getting a little more rough with him. I reached down and grab the collar and gave it a bit of a twist, tightening it on his neck. Simultaneously I pulled the collar down, pulling him onto my cock. This did a bit of breath control, or breath restriction, while he continued to suck my cock.
I kept the color twisted until his body language was telling me he was at his limit on breath control. So I released the collar and I just laid back on the bed enjoying whatever in the fuck he was doing with his tongue. Oh my God, it was incredible.
I remember him repositioning himself, I think to get up on his elbows a bit. He slid his hands under my legs almost cupping my butt cheeks whereas before they had been on top of my legs, his forearms almost resting on my chest toward my nipples. Now that his upper arms were under my legs, I took the advantage and raised both of my legs onto his back. I crossed my legs locking them and behind his back squeezed his head between my legs.
With my hands, I forced him deep onto my cock. Then I tightened the squeeze of my legs holding him in place. No longer
Rush
I could feel the blood coursing through my veins. My skin was flushed and I could feel my heart beat with excitement. I cast my gaze downward, taking in the full length of the beauty who had submitted to me. Sweat glistend from her soft skin. Her arms and legs stretched to their full extent. Her eyes pleading. Her mouth clentched on the gag which stifled her words, but did little to muffle her moans.
It was her idea. She wanted to have her limits pushed. Pushed beyond her previous play. I was riding her edge in so many ways. Keeping her on the brink. Permission withheld. Applying pleasure, and pain according to her liking, but never enough. She could flirt with her orgasm, but I held her back. Torture, but not from pain. Torture from the pleasure without release.
I abandoned her to her need. That look on her face. Pleading with her eyes and body.
I wanted a break. Taking my time.
Poured myself a tall ice water to cool off. I walked back the ice clinking in my glass.
The bed complained as I settle next to her. She did not. I was greeted with an expectant look. A smirk even. She was ready for the next chaper. She knew that the story had not run its course.
I admired the marks that I left on her body. Hand prints and crop marks set upon a pink background from a generous amount of flogging. I plucked an ice cube from my glass. Gentlly traced my marks with the ice, leaving a trail of water and a slight shiver from my submissive.
My tracing spiraled around her breasts encouraging her nipples to their full extent.
I teased her belly button then towards her clit. I alternated between a vibrator and the ice until it melted. I retrieved the remaining ice from my glass. Traced her inner thigh. I rub the entrance before slipping the ice inside. I could see the discomfort, as I relished my control. Inserted another piece for good measure.
I could feel the blood flowing to my cock. Engorged and ready.
I rubbed the head against her, before sliding inside. I savored the cold created by her internal ice bath. It was time to get started...
Do you like that?/
I keep his throat in my pocket/
He tries to bite back/
I'm sleeping deep in his lungs/
He wants to deny that/
He's on the edge of his seat/
And he's trying not to break, but I give it 'bout a week/
I'm made of linen and salt, my blood is made up of feathers/
He runs on language and laughter, he's made of leather and pepper/
Our limbs walk over to each other, the bodies are shoving/
And I grab him by the tie and, oh god,I think he's blushing/
And the tactics, accents, rip my seam/
He's a hopeless, focused, fucked up dream/
And he's trying not to crawl, 'cause he won't say he needed me/
And he's trying not to sleep, 'cause all he does is dream of me/
His family's scared of me 'cause the concept of sex is stronger than the concept of god/
And when he's missing on Sunday, they know who's at fault/
And I'll return him home, sick with a fever/
'Cause his still on the ground, on his knees, in a theatre/
'Cause I'm the backyard heathen/
The girl he's dreamin'/
I'll bend him over backwards, give him something to believe in/
No end, no completion/
He says stop teasing/
We'll play the game, both go insane, and then we'll call it even/
'Cause his chest is heaving/
His knees got weakened/
All strong and rough and tough, but I ruined that in an evening/
I sunk my teeth in/
And by next weekend/
You're admitting I'm the only god that you'll ever believe in/
Why is it we can no longer write in full words anymore, is it just me out of touch or does reading a profile become a challenged at times 🤪
Totally get abbreviations in conversation but surely when filing out a profile a little time could be spent
MF CD F M TG TS DDF HWP Cis FLR LTR IRL BBW Ds BS …………….
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