2/23/2018 11:53:35 PM: so i took my mother out for valentine's day, and i noticed there were 2 young men sitting together. i thought 'that's sweet'. well, it was sweet until someone else joined their table. i couldn't help but notice a construction worker stumbled into the diner, and the 2 young gentlemen waved the construction worker down. he sat down in the middle of them and they began talking. this is where it gets sick... the waiter comes by and asks them if they knew what they wanted, and they said that they needed a few more minutes. well, they started to play a disgusting, dangerous game right here in the restaurant. i could see the table shaking, and i saw a look of ecstasy in both of the young men's faces while the construction worker was grinning ear to ear. the waiter came back and of course they were ready this time. he ordered for these 2 fags while they were drinking water and, simultaneously, the water just so happened to 'go down the wrong pipe'. The waiter turned away with a grin and with a fully-pitched tent (almost knocked over my mimosa). I officially never want to go out to eat at this place again

2/18/2018 7:53:10 PM: So there are cream pies...has anyone heard of cherry pies? Hint: my Auntie Flo taught me about them.

1/25/2018 2:08:48 PM: A little idea for a poem that I'm working on in honor of Black History Month.. The BLACK WOMAN...oooooh lawd! She's strong, she'll surprise/ Fuck with her, she'll jigger in your eyes The BLACK WOMAN...guuuurrrllll Sista, sista, hear her loud and strong/Big ol' booty, she needs that dick long The BLACK WOMAN...sheeeeiiiitttt snaps fingersMother Africa, bitches. 

1/8/2018 3:05:03 PM: I just saw the most brutal boxing match between 2 burly dykes. Jesus Christ, these women were like gloved bears. Even the ref didn't want to get close. How these specimens could come out of hibernation just to duke it out for bragging rights is the most badass thing I've seen. For God's sake, my car was stuck in the snow and the one that LOST by getting her face beat in pushed my car out...BY HERSELF . Be scared, faggots. 

1/7/2018 2:45:12 AM: Dear fucking God. So, I was visiting family in South NJ (where I thought I was safe), and of course I saw more of that sick shit. I went to a nice little deli that had vegan options and as I was walking out to my car, I saw a man walk into a snowplow truck and shut the door hastily. I shrugged it off as nothing and continued to eat my yummy vegan hoagie. I then started to hear a man yelling and of course, I look at the snowplow. In the fucking daylight, I saw a man in another man's lap bouncing up and down. Not only that, but the squatter picked up his phone and spoke without wincing and then put it down. He giggled and then kissed the faggot that was sitting down. I could only watch in horror as they finished dramatically and the squatter walked out and ordered a hoagie while the 'snow'plower drove off with a wide smile. I hate Jersey.