I've browsed around for a few months and found that 95% of these ads are fakes, spam or gay guys looking for pics... so I'm still hopeful but I'm taking a break for a while. 

Daddy918 - because I'm a dad, I have 3 kids and 918 is our area code.

I'm more of a Head of Household but I've been a real Dad for 23 years so I'll always have my Daddy side. 

Short version:

Sex is the easy part so there's no need to write about that.

Me - normal, stable, professional job, grew up in a healthy Christian 1950's type home.  I'm firm but caring, I provide a great home and discipline / guidance. I have kids but they're older and they don't need a mom, they are here a few days each week. The youngest is 11.  I'm athletic, stay in shape, eat healthy, enjoy a good bike ride or a jog, a game of pool and a beer, a day at the museum and then a nice dinner out, love concerts or just an evening on the back porch looking out into the woods and watching the deer graze or the birds at the feeders. I'm also FIXED so there will be no more kids for me.

You - SMART, FUNNY, not lazy, cook, clean, take care of the house and I'll take care of you. Do as your told, treat me with respect and you'll get treated even better.  If you have a career, want to finish college then I'm fine with that too.  NO lazy people!  You will not sleep while I'm at work paying the bills.  I work hard to take care of mine, provide for mine, reward mine... so I expect hard work in return.

You will not be a drunk, you will stay somewhat fit and healthy and I prefer that you not smoke cigarettes.  If you belong to me then you better take care of what you're offering to give me.  Be happy, sane and stable, I do not tolerate drama for very long.