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DaddyDemonsBaby
Hetero Female Submissive, 32, Wloo, Iowa US 
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DaddyDemonsBaby

Well, it seems i have been X-ed out by DaddyDemon so i'm going to be getting one final profile. i'll be transfering my last journal entry over to the new profile.

the new name? simple, it is my own, after all that IS who i am. right?

MarandaJean

2/23/2010 5:03:41 PM: Well, today i was told by a very close friend that i need a companion. i'm not sure if he meant it as in, 'you need a local person just to chill out and bullshit with' or if He meant someone a little more 'special'. i do have a real life Dominent friend that i hold very dear. actually got to see Him last night for a number of hours. it was real nice to be able to joke around and watch stupid stuff on-line.normally our meetings are either very emotional (on my side) or highly sexually charged. but last night was just, well, chill.one thing that kind of worried me was when He told me i had changed. at first i thought He meant it in a bad way, but then He explained that it is a very good thing. i just told Him to look at the place i had lived and who i was living with last year.yeah, He knew it would not last long when the other tried to keep me from my friends. plus, He didn't like the other from day one. i should have listened to Him.i have had to leave very bad relationships because of my own anger but the last RL...it was not for that same reason. i became afraid.  many of my RL friends saw this. the one time i get invited to go to a bar and strip club with two friends, i had never seen such hate in his eyes. the tone in his voice. i told my friends to forget it and i was going home. they of course would not let me. i had a nice time. i got so drunk, the dude almost carried me. but when i stumbled up the steps and inside the apartment i was no longer afraid of him. and i told him how i felt.through out the years i have been here i know i have had a ton of men, no...boys, listed as my owner. i have had so many profiles that i don't even know them all. i have been severly injured, put down, dehumanized to the point that i'd attempted suicided more than once on cam, joked, teased, bullied...blah blah blah. but my life is no longer about these people (you know who you are), instead it is about the ones who saw passed the big boobs and ghetto booty, the ones who saw my eyes and knew the pain that trying to hide behind them. PaganJack, the one that so gentaly broke my heart and held me as i cried. littlesnafoo(i'll never spell that right), never gave up on me and our bond even when i tried so hard to push him away. MasterDark11411, He has taught me that ownership is not just a collar and that i deserve so much better than what i was settling for.  Daddy4babygirl, one sick man but a great friend to have. rxstrenghtdom, i know that my last major break was a drain to you and i am very sorry. thank you for beining to talk to me again. SirStrongblood, i know that we have spoken before but damn if i can keep everyone straight. fragglechyck, since the first day i met you in the DaddyDoms room, you have always been a source of great support. i luv ya girl. these are the people ^^^ that have carried me through some of the harderst times in my life. i respect all of you so very much and i hope to someday meet the ones that i have not. to those whom i have not listed, i'm sorry but you were the few good ones that were there only because i needed you for a very short time, but i still thank you.well, i think i'll stop for now and remake my main profile...maybe. 2/22/2010 4:11:02 PM: i am so happy! yeah right... i've been X-ed! thanks a lot Demon. makes me feel like a real dumb ass. makes me look even worse. very nice! 2/19/2010 8:00:10 AM: Grade update: Comp2 B, Programming A, Networking A+ 2/17/2010 12:15:11 PM: Will the tears ever stop? When will You come get me? You say I am bad. You consider me worthless. You dismiss me as nothing. Perhaps it is not You but I. 2/12/2010 6:50:00 PM: Good Luck the country of GEORGIA. Sorry for the loss of you team mate...RIP Nodor.with that said:i used to think my family came from germany and norway but seeing them on the opening ceromonies, i realize i was very wrong. my family, on my dad's side looks nothing like the germans or the norweigns. but the females from Austria look like me and the men like my dad.  i guess we were right when we thought that the guy that ran Austria for such a long time, Helmut Zilk rip 2008, really was my cousin. so, yeah, that's pretty cool.
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