Seeking My Devoted Alpha Lighthouses. Lost in the darkness, I am searching for my Guiding Lights. I need Lighthouses to steer me home, to keep me safe, and to show me the right path after a long journey away. I seek partners who can provide that stable, illuminating strength.
Hello there. I'm a 52-year-old single white female (SSBBW), never married, and eagerly ready to dive back into the BDSM lifestyle that enriched my life for nearly 7.5 years. After a 16-year hiatus, I'm returning with a high sex drive and a heart open to deep, committed connection.
My Kink & Lifestyle Snapshot: I started as a submissive but have mild slave tendencies that will take time and patience to explore again due to past trauma, needing to gain trust, and getting my feet back into the water. I seek a balanced life where the intensity of our play is grounded by genuine affection and stability. What I Desire in Play: Sensational and Sensory Exploration. I revel in feeling and sensation. My past favorites include: Violet Wands and Fire Play, Rope Play, Bondage, and Rope Dresses, Sensory Deprivation, Wax Play, Flogging, and Cupping, Knife Play (with safety and consent prioritized, of course). Intimate & Affectionate: Beyond the kink, I treasure cuddling and kissing. Always Learning: I am eager to explore new experiences, but it's important to know that I do not consider myself a masochist.
A Unique Desire: Lactation Induction. I have a profound desire for lactation induction and am hoping to be introduced to a goat milker. I look forward to being used several hours a day to produce milk, viewing this intensive process not just as play, but as a unique and profound way of bonding and deepening commitment with my future partner(s).
What I'm Seeking: A Polyandrous Family. I am seeking a life-long, committed polyandrous relationship that will lead to a live-in situation. The joy of the lifestyle, like the feeling of being understood and accepted at previous munches and play parties, is what I hope to recapture and make permanent. The Men I Desire (My Lighthouses): I seek Alpha Men (possibly bisexual) who are Loving, Caring, Family Oriented, Consistent, Dependable, Stable, Honest and Trustworthy, Committed to All of Us, Respectful of Limits & Boundaries, Good Communication Skills, Wishes to Live this Lifestyle, Clean, and Open. A Note on Trauma: I am seeking partners who are understanding and realizing that I have experienced past trauma. My limits and boundaries are non-negotiable and need to be respected to ensure a safe, balanced dynamic that includes a mix of kink and vanilla life.
Logistics & Lifestyle: Substance-Free: I am a nonsmoker, barely drink, and do not do drugs. I strongly prefer that my partner(s) maintain this same clean lifestyle. Relocation: I am possibly willing to relocate for the right situation and the right partners. If you are an Alpha man (or men) who values deep commitment, understands the gravity of safe kink, and is ready to explore a lifetime of devotion and unique bonding, I would love to hear from you.
ALSO on FET ladyocean73
The Standard of Respect
I have been active in this lifestyle for a long time; I am not new, and I am certainly not naive. I have put significant effort into my profile and journals because I value transparency. I expect the same in return.
No Instant Demands: Do not lead with demands for pictures or "bowing down."
Reciprocity: If your profile is empty, do not expect me to do the heavy lifting. I want to know who you are, just as I have shared who I am.
Hard Boundaries: I am not looking for degradation, humiliation, or to be treated as a "doormat." I know my worth. I am an SSBBW and I am comfortable in my skin; if that is not your preference, please move along without comment. Also to be upfront hard limts t giving oral and giving rimming are hard limits.
The Dynamic: Polyandry (One Female, Multiple Males)
I am seeking a committed, long-term Polyandrous dynamic. I am specifically looking for a life-long connection with more than one man.
Why Polyandry? I have a high drive and a vast amount of love to give. I’ve found that one partner often cannot meet all my needs, and I refuse to be left alone or feel neglected.
No MFF/FMF: I have explored these dynamics in the past and found them to be unfair. I am not interested in being the "added" female to an existing couple.
The Vision: I envision a household where we are all connected. I am particularly interested in bisexual men, as I believe this fosters a deeper bond between all members of the family, ensuring no one is ever "the odd man out."
Commitment & Independence
Financial Autonomy: I intend to work. I have been financially dependent on men in the past and felt trapped; I will not repeat that mistake. I am a partner, not a dependent.
The "Family" Bond: While not legally married, I am looking for that level of emotional and spiritual commitment. I value structure—such as rotating schedules to ensure everyone gets 1-on-1 bonding time as well as group time.
Real Life Only: I am not here for "cybering," "hookups," or digital-only fantasies. I am looking for a real-world, long-term family structure.
Final Thoughts
I realize what I am asking for is rare. I am not "young," and I am not interested in settling. I would much rather be alone than be unhappy or disrespected. If you are a mature, respectful man who understands the depth of a polyandrous commitment, I welcome a thoughtful introduction.
I just realzied that people can subcribe to my journal. If you have any ideas drop me a line. Have had writers block.
I updated my profile today. My age is correct and added something to hopefullly correct confusion in my profile as well as my my Fet username.
Does anyone else crave a connection that is so deep and powerful that it feels like a life line that can't exist without it that connection?
It is something that i crave in the very cell of my being. I am looking to feel it is as though it makes my heart beat or helps air fill my lungs. Online that can be very hard to do as we are not phyisically around each other to get that feeling. Online it is though connection in words or hearing each other voices. I need to find my future Partners that need connections as much as I do. That want and need to be together as much as possible.
I know that we all have lives and that the world around us can keep us busy. When I am getting to know someone and willing to see where it goes, maybe i am unrealistic but i try to be on this site or other places where we have made a connection to communicate and wait around and respond as quickly as i recieve it or can respond because it is like a lifeline to me to help my heart beat or my lungs take breaths to stay alive. I get frustrated and i have lashed out in my frustration when other's don't do the same things i guess because i feel actions are stronger than words. In me responding quickly is showing that i am taking it seriously and wishing to put in the work to see if this will work out. If not i try to at least wish them the best of luck in finding the one that will make them feel the way i need and crave the connection as well.
My profile needs a make over but afraid to do it because when I do I have to wait a long time to be approved.
I see myself as being primal prey and to the right male partners their omega. Also wish to be hooked up to goat milker and produce milk. I am not looking to be degraded, humiliated, or objectified. I am not a into pain so please no sadists. I am seeking committed polyandry hopefully we can all be committed to each other or even a pack.
