5/17/2015 9:31:05 AM: My understanding on being a GOOD SUBMISSIVE Becoming a Submissive is a very common sexual fantasy, but fulfilling it may take more time and energy than simply buying a set of cuff's!!! A Submisisve is an individual who willingly, relinquishes control to another person. The act of submitting to the authority or control of another. The condition of having submitted to control by someone else. The Surrendering of power to another person. Obedient, slavish, servile and compliant are just a few other words that can be used to describe submissive behaviour. Clearly one needs to understand the true meaning of being a submissive it is a willful declaration of giving up the powers/control factor to the dominant and yes it again depends on case to case situation to situation and importantly preferences of Dominants as well. Like what type of subs they want. D/s relationship is not all about whipping, abusing, rough sex and please kill if any other misconceptions are prevailing. Because it involves mind control, trust, power exchange, behavior control, social activity control, loyalty It is a conscious choice to submit. Should have right mindset and know the meaning of Submission very clearly it is not just being a door mat, which is not the requirement of good dominants. The servitude and submissive nature should come deep within the heart and submissive should really mean it and show it. There has to be an emotional stability, a willingness to communicate fully with your Dom, a desire to work at the relationship. On an instance many people feel they are submissive and without knowing anything they would usually brag can do anything for you can be 24/7 slave, can drink pee, can eat - - - -, have got no limits blah blah blah!!!!!! Very funny. Check is that what the dominant wants!!!!!! There is no rule book or process controlled documents established like one size fits all. It varies and depends on multiple factors and mainly the dominant’s look out and definition or priorities and likes in this lifestyle. But it is a journey and it requires time to understand banking on various factors like the time availability of dominant, type or nature of profession they are into + importantly get to know their likes/dislikes slowly over a period of time and it is a balancing act. First of all a sub should be honest and start interaction only if he/she has trust on the dominant completely, Shed Ego or rather ground it to less than ZERO, , be respectful, be polite, be obedient, always ask & get clarified, try to understand, listen, express clearly, effective communication very important, learn never to say ‘No’ rather than simply saying ‘No’ explain in depth politely and leave the final deciding authority to the dom, Follow instructions, don’t manipulate, don’t cheat behind their backs, learn to confess and be honest. Understand from the perspective of a dominant they are not salaried people employed by any company, they have their own professional life, commitments, challenges and things to deal with. Don’t expect dominant to be your nany sitter or spoon feeder to you at all aspects or situations or times. Get the gist of what is expected and seek more clarity wait for their mind to allow you to give time and energy. Don’t have expectations which only works for you, do not assume things and get confused in the end. If somebody is thinking being sub to a natural rightful dominant who knows the lifestyle and has lived the lifestyle as well as practised the lifestyle is EASY. Forget it & don’t even think of enhancing the journey forward!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! “Being a Sub is calling………………. Can’t be taught but a skill that can be polished” To polish the shoe should be ready! It is a full bundled package of all below bullet points Be Attentive Be Focussed Be Ready to Put Efforts, Work Hard Learn, Improve and Don’t Repeat Don’t have fear but respect Be prepared to learn Be Honest Be Patient Be Sincere Be Dedicated Be Loyal Be Disciplined Understand, Understand and simply bloody well Understand Have grasping Skills Seek Guidance Do not Forget, Learn to make notes, constantly and always Kill Your EGO Build Trust Be prepared to be pushed on your limits Few Don’ts Don’t Cheat Don’t Lie Don’t Fake Don’t misrepresent Don’t be silly or act dumb or at least pretend to be Dumb. (Thinking you will get punishments on the reverse it would be irritating to the Dom) Don't be a burden/pain Don't Pretend / Manipulate things After having said in the bullet points above would elaborate on few topics which need to be known in depth for a Good Submissive Different people view this in different ways and methods, it is the willful submission of the mind, heart and soul of the submissive without being worried or thinking too much regarding, what, why, how etc and the responsibility of the dominant is multi fold because another soul is giving up its entire life keys in the hands of the dominant. Learning to be a Submissive:- 'A person can learn to swim but cannot become a fish' Yes you could learn to be a submissive like it could be more or less termed as Role playing or bottoming, where a person who may not be submissive all the time and has different faces to display and act in outside world or his job role but will act in a submissive manner, to a certain dominant, for an agreed amount of time in a play session. Some people are naturally submissives or true submisisves, these people do not learn to act in a submissive manner, they SIMPLY ARE Submissive, there could be training to learn the correct way of doing things for her dominant. One of the Key elements of this whole life style is the Trust and the Trust is everything in order to achieve the fullest submission by mind, heart and soul, when I say by the mind, it means dedication by mind wilfully serving via the mind utilising mind as much as possible to serve the holy mistress, utilising the body as much as possible to serve the holy mistress and soulful thoughts meaning deep within the soul consciousness should be fully developed to think of the holy mistress. Trust builds over a period of time, but once the trust builds then there is nothing to break in even the family, friends none of it will have the power to break the strong faith and dedication that lies deep within the submissive soul. Next vital factor is EGO, it should be ground to ZERO and absolute ZERO nothing more than that before entering the lifestyle. Honesty, Sincerity and loyalty is another aspect which makes this bridge of D/s stronger, convicted and more successful. Because liars and cheats break the efforts that a dominant puts in to get the life style going in a particular direction or a flow, a rightful dominant knows what is that he/she wants herself/himself from a dominant stand point and at the same time what should be given to sub and how should it be given to a submissive, it is a fair play vindictive to the fact that ultimately the submissive belongs to the dominant and dominant owns the submissive. At the other hand all said and done the submissive cannot just whack off for the time being or for the moment and forget the whole purpose of this bond’s survival. Always the submissive should equally strive for the satisfaction, happiness and wellbeing of the dominant, who in turn takes care of the submissive towards the more than required extent. Another key aspect is the important things a submissive should do is know the Dominant better and better and better and really better, it doesn’t happen within few hours or few days or few years, it is a life time learning but always being observant and giving fullest attention to the dominant will give a fair chance of getting to know the dominant fully and ultimately the one thing is to serve by heart, mind and soul one should know the likes/dislikes of the dominant more than anything else. And indulge by heart to give all the satisfactions to the dominant by doing those things whether small or big without being told. It should slowly start working like a routine right hand and left hand sorts, for example when the food is there the hand goes forward to take and to start eating automatically which could be termed as “Response to Stimulus” to achieve this the submissive has to be really keen in serving the dominant for life time. Understanding the Dom is a real requirement and it does not come easy because different fingers are of different sizes and it depends on the individual Dom the preferences, likes and dislikes. Like for instance there would be specific skill sets that needs to be picked up, learnt, practiced which means goes without saying it has to be learnt or practiced simple example is if a particular dom likes her sub to be an expert cook and let us assume the sub has never ever done any cooking job, honesty again plays a key role. Sub should admit that he has never involved himself in cooking activity but is ready to put efforts to learn cooking. Sub puts in efforts & strives to learn and cook. (Right Dom would never try to break his sub but equally put time and efforts in making the sub rightful and perfect cook, with proper guidance, wisdom and support as well as encouragement to grow and learn) In a real life D/s relationship beware it is not just a fantasy. You would have to take away all of your problems, all of your stress, and take money out of the equation, then still be willing to submit to someone else is what you have to think through? There is no rule that just because he/she is a Dom it is their responsibility always to spend or take care or vice versa. However the rules would be clear who wears the pants!!!! Key Note: Subs trying to play with multiple doms is never appreciated and even under consideration or trial have to be strictly honest and have respect or value for the time of their dominant. Yes there is a way it depends on the dominant, whether they prefer to share their subs and few Doms do that in order to give a wide range of learning experience and train their subs to explore more widely.

5/12/2015 9:52:52 AM: Feminism is the most revolutionary idea there has ever been. Equality for women demands a change in the human psyche, more profound than anything Marx dreamed of. Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow, without the love and security of the dominant lady I can do nothing, with her love & affection / training there is nothing I cannot do. (My life is truly saved only by the grace of such selfless dominant lady wherein from have seen a raise in my life from nothing to everything)   'I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have served the width of it as well.' 'Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are one important Domina to serve, one important Domina to satisfy, and one important Domina to Die for – if the need be.' ('Our lives improve only when we take chances -- and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves.' TRUST & Honesty are two important key aspects for this life style”)   My further Understanding:- According to me the D/s relationship is very unique and sacred because it is not just a few words of abuse or few spankings and just a mere role play or a game to satisfy the sexual hunger. Different people view this in different ways and methods, it is the willful submission of the mind, heart and soul of the submissive without being worried or thinking too much regarding, what, why, how etc and the responsibility of the dominant is multi fold because another soul is giving up its entire life keys in the hands of the dominant. I truly believe and adore this statement 'A woman's guess is much more accurate than a man's certainty' yes but the woman should be the right one, otherwise it is a journey towards perpetual destruction!!!! One of the Key elements of this whole life style is the Trust and the Trust is everything in order to achieve the fullest submission by mind, heart and soul, when I say by the mind, it means dedication by mind wilfully serving via the mind utilising mind as much as possible to serve the holy mistress, utilising the body as much as possible to serve the holy mistress and soulful thoughts meaning deep within the soul consciousness should be fully developed to think of the holy mistress. Trust builds over a period of time, but once the trust builds then there is nothing to break in even the family, friends none of it will have the power to break the strong faith and dedication that lies deep within the submissive soul.  Next vital factor is EGO, it should be ground to ZERO and absolute ZERO nothing more than that before entering the lifestyle. Honesty, Sincerity and loyalty is another aspect which makes this bridge of D/s stronger, convicted and more successful. Because liars and cheats break the efforts that a dominant puts in to get the life style going in a particular direction or a flow, a rightful dominant knows what is that he/she wants herself/himself from a dominant stand point and at the same time what should be given to sub and how should it be given to a submissive, it is a fair play vindictive to the fact that ultimately the submissive belongs to the dominant and dominant owns the submissive. At the other hand all said and done the submissive cannot just whack off for the time being or for the moment and forget the whole purpose of this bond’s survival. Always the submissive should equally strive for the satisfaction, happiness and wellbeing of the dominant, who in turn takes care of the submissive towards the more than required extent. Note: Subs trying to play with multiple doms is never appreciated and even under consideration or trial have to be strictly honest and have respect or value for the time of their dominant. Another key aspect is the important things a submissive should do is know the Dominant better and better and better and really better, it doesn’t happen within few hours or few days or few years, it is a life time learning but always being observant and giving fullest attention to the dominant will give a fair chance of getting to know the dominant fully and ultimately the one thing is to serve by heart, mind and soul one should know the likes/dislikes of the dominant more than anything else. And indulge by heart to give all the satisfactions to the dominant by doing those things whether small or big without being told. It should slowly start working like a routine right hand and left hand sorts, for example when the food is there the hand goes forward to take and to start eating automatically which could be termed as “Response to Stimulus” to achieve this the submissive has to be really keen in serving the dominant for life time. Understanding the Dom is a real requirement and it does not come easy because different fingers are of different sizes and it depends on the individual Dom the preferences, likes and dislikes. Like for instance there would be specific skill sets that needs to be picked up, learnt, practiced which means goes without saying it has to be learnt or practiced simple example is if a particular dom likes her sub to be an expert gardener and let us assume the sub has never even walked in a garden, honesty again plays a key role. Sub should admit that he has never involved himself in Gardening activity but is ready to put efforts to become a gardener and request guidance from the dom. And then based on available guidance he has to strive and put in efforts to learn and effectively become a gardener. (Right Dom would never try to break his sub but equally put time and efforts in making the sub rightful and perfect gardener, with proper guidance, wisdom and support as well as encouragement to grow) Obedience is another key thing and this obedience should be right from the heart and the respect should flow from the bottom of the heart not a mere show off. A true submissive will go and achieve unsung glories and achieves excellent results if he is serving a right dominant and today even me working in this position is the grace of my ex domina who by heart loved me yes but only as a submissive and not as a lover!!! Her discipline took me to places. For a sub me everything evolves, lives and dies with trust not only in this life style and trust should mean everything. Efforts are very much important and the submissive should strive to put in all the required efforts, otherwise submissive need not be a submissive and a piece of scrap.           Today’s world the type of Submissive’s found:- Few of them shared with pain and distress during chat that so called subs loitering and hovering around internet purely are by products of the Internet coverage on BDSM topics and courtesy of free clips uploaded on Youtube. They are so fully right! Effect of internet many people want to be subs/slaves who do not understand the depth of it commitment required and never ever understand the meaning of loyalty as well as the sacred bonding between the D/s which is far more wider and deeper than parents/siblings/spouses which people experience or could be exposed to. Many of them are confused that this lifestyle is forced sex, being abused or abusing, and just hang around the specific BDSM sites to get an instant thrill and release. But the true submissive intent would be simply to seek the happiness of dominant and in turn the dominant is well aware what sort of returns need to be given to the sub! It cannot be understood by watching movies, clips or reading stories. Patience and Perseverance plays a key role in this lifestyle which neither many of the subs know or are willing to understand and out of their desperation have paved the ways for many fake doms and money making machines who call themselves lifestyle dominatrix/pro domes. (Personally am not against them but a true submissive would never enjoy just couple of hours by paying few rupees, on the contrary am talking about the right sub to a right dom registering whole of himself am repeating it has to be right dom and being cheated is no excuse, rather than the mere stupidity)