This is me. I am older, overweight, not highly attractive, have IUD (if that is a concern), and have a bad back so my mobility can be limiting. I am a professional, college educated, and work full time in a research field. I have cats (so if you are allergic, probably best to avoid me, only because cat hair lingers). I have never been married and have no kids.

I do have a roommate, who is also my best friend and we have lived together 18 years, and yes, we were originally a couple and after 5 years the romantic part just didn't work, but we are close (but still separate bedrooms and lives).

I am highly intelligent, artistic, love to read, and have a dry sense of humor. I am a people pleaser, who loves animals (all kinds) and the elderly. I am generous to a fault. I have been in and out of the lifestyle for about 15 years. Had one long term Dom/ Daddy that I adored, until I found out he was married (am happy to discuss further, as there were other issues that arose) but we continued to be friends (no sexual or D/s involved). I have had a couple of other shorter term encounters. In past, I have gone to munches, meetings, and parties.

I am not a brat. I don't like disappointing people, or bringing pain or hurt to any living thing. I take on more responsibility than I should, and keep many of my thoughts and feelings buried. In other words, yes I come with baggage. My last Dom sort of broke me and not in a good way and I have spent the last five years putting myself back together and staying away from the lifestyle, but I will be honest and say it is a work in progress. He broke trust in many different ways, and that is the single most important thing to a D/s relationship.

I am fiercely loyal to those to which I am close. I love kink and pain in various forms. I am not looking to be a slave. I am looking for something meaningful. I need a monogamous, long term confident Dom, who is patient and understanding. He needs to understand what is truly key to what makes a D/s relationship rewarding.

There needs to be friendship, loyalty, trust, open communications, and honesty. He needs to listen, ask me questions, and be intuitive enough to know what I need and what will bring the most pleasure in a comfortable safe setting. He needs to be hygienic, safe from any STDs, intelligent, witty, strong (both emotionally and physically), comfortably confident, patient, understanding, be willing to learn, loyal, open, and honest. I want to learn something (and it doesn't have to be anything about the lifestyle, i just love learning), so I would love someone who likes to share his intellect.

I ask a lot, but I give more.

If you managed to get this far in reading, then reach out and introduce yourself. I move slowly, as trust has to be built and that takes time. I also have been very selective with past partners so there have been few. I would also be honored to just be friends with those who may be interested