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 a1983little
Hetero Female Submissive, 34, Uk, United Kingdom 

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Hi all, please call me lu




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Lu

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Submissive Male, 43
 Shrewsbury, United Kingdom
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So yes, I am looking, but slowly. My needs have not changed so terribly much, but they are non-negotiable.  Be familiar with polyamory, and comfortable with a poly dynamic Be service oriented. My life is full to overflowing with responsibilities, I need someone who is driven to reduce my burdens Be intillectually stimulating - politics, science, culture, history, psychology etc. Engage the brain. Be Pet friendly - I have two big dogs, live in the country, keep chickens etc.  If you're a city only person, no dice.  Be a foodie or nearly so - it is one of the great creature comforts of life to explore and enjoy food Be not conservative. This wing of politics in the US has been subsumed into an authoritarian, fascism based mob trying to dictate our lives.   Be pro-LGBTQ. Trans folks in the US are under attack. I am rabidly pro-civil rights for Trans folks. Be good with that, or be gone. Be politically engaged. If you don't vote, don't know whats happening, you're abdicating your responsibility.  Be reasonably put together - you must have a license, a car, a job, and some degree of education.  Be articulate. If you send a one liner, I may just delete and block. It depends on my mood.  Be aware of perimenopause and what that does to women. Its no small thing. Why do I have to put these things in bullet points?  I guess I've just seen too much garbage in my day, and right now, I'm tired. I am here to find what works for me, not to accommodate other people's interests or wants.  
Thought it would be helpful to cover a few points here... Interview style conversation is not my thing, if you want to get to know me then use your ability to hold a flowing conversation,  not an interview I am single, I do not see why anyone in a happy relationship would be on sites chatting so I assume you are also single ... if not then please don't waste our time with trying to strike up a chit chat  As of this year, 2022 I will be 50 on my next birthday and I found the lifestyle when I was about 21 so you do the maths  Sorry but I don't want to meet someone who is close to my children's age, to be safe if you are more than 10 years older or younger than me we won't be matched  I am not a slave, honestly I am very sure of that. I do have strong sub tendencies with the right alpha male but seriously if you don't consume my head you won't stand a chance of controlling anything else I am not into poly or sharing or being shared. I am totally monogamous and if you are not then flick over to the next profile I live with my family, happy to discuss with the right person but I have a young child at home so seek someone who understands how to make a vanilla and lifestyle combined relationship work whilst keeping tiny ones protected from it all I am a non smoker, I don't vape, I rarely drink and am seeking someone similar. Nights in the pub are not of interest I work full time and have limited time free so I am not in a position to travel to meet someone, so local is needed. For anyone who thinks a plane ride is local then jog on as you really are not on the realistic spectrum I am seeking  Yes I have been collared twice and for some reason it seems relevant but to be honest the first waited almost a year before it happened as he knew to me I see it as a serious commitment I do have limits which are a mix of health and personal things so happy to discuss but they are not negotiable  Likes, vanilla and lifestyle wise are varied but those can be savoured as part of a conversation  I hope that has given a flavour and please do find happiness in your journey but don't come across my pathway of you are a new dom I am not looking to teach you the ropes, a dom who really is a sub (there are many on here), if you are a female dom (so not my thing), if you are a male sub and finally no female subs.  Cheers x 
I wrote a response and I am going to include in journal. Not so,  Words can be read, with the meaning behind them getting lost. Sometimes if not most of the time,  The answers are not on the surface instead they in the layers that are below.    It would be for those that go deeper, poke at the surface to discover what is so close.     I may have used to many words ..  My therapy is in the past, I put a lot of effort into proving what wasn't the answer I was seeking.    It took time, to not think to solve problems, find better solutions and do everything myself while trying to convince others to follow.   The loss was always relationships. I chose to take the relationship path before I met you    I had no idea the journey that followed.    When you say I am looking for someone to solve my problem for me on the contrary.    I try to steer from say things I don't want or not looking for.    I am not looking for someone to want to solve anything on my behalf or be that feel good help save the day desire.     It's hard not to find that behind the mask in a lot of profiles.    I seek a true selfish, Dominant woman that overlooks any interest in knowing what I may or may not want or have opinion.     Someone who expaspects my voice when called upon to speak. Someone who will not ask if it hurts or if I like something.   I am interested in your leadership, if you will treat property as an asset that gives you return on investment and time.  Will you maximize the asset you own and maintain while training to correct imperfections and lack of training before you owned it.    I look to sure see to a life I have only played out in my mind a thousand times. That there is no word no in my vocabulary.  It's prove you right never wrong.  To not ask or seek pleasure making you the focal point of why I exist.   For that is where I find purpose and a reason to be alive.  That is my nature something I tried to change.    I take what is needed from only that is given, all efforts are to improve and comfort and entertain my owner.   I accept it's still a challenge..   Yes if you say I look for someone to solve my problem. If looking for a qualified owner ?  I am seeking that.  My decision to surrender is precise. Your definition of property is precise.  I have only one choice then yes an owner does solve what ever problem may occur.  I am looking not for problems but some one to lead. 
A bit of a rant here but Men SUCK!   They are selfish, rude, inconsiderate and far, far too unreasonable.   I fully see and understand why so many women are weary and overwhelmed and just done with men online so often.I have said before i'm pansexual.   Over the past year, I have spoken with several men.   I wouldn't call them Doms as their actions don't warrant the term.   I am learning that Most men fall into one of 3 categories.  Most, but not all.   Most of whom have spoken to me anyways.   And at least one, but many of the many fall into all 3.1 - very very very sexual.  So very sexual focus even when I push and try to talk 'relationship'.   Having no desire or interest of talking likes or hobbies, or what they like to do for fun(besides sexual comments) and usually very quickly stearing the conversation back to sex or kink.2 - very very very unreasonable.I understand the desire to move quick and to not string things along.   I'm more than willing to meet for coffee the same day if it works out and you are 30 min or an hour away or so depending on circumstances.   I HAVE before.But most men online that I speak to are much further away.One after speaking for 2-3 days kept asking nonstop about trying to make plans to meet.   I offered to videochat(I know, but if done the RIGHT way it's like taling over dinner or coffee at a coffeeshop)(almost a Must to establish and maintain anything long distance without a lot of money invested in travel)Bit he didn't want to videochat.  Just make plans and set up a flight(paid for by me) in the next couple weeks or month or so.   I didn't lead him on, was honest and upfront, and frankly..  after 2-3 days?!?Another after a week started active planning a trip, HALFWAY across the country(1500 miles away), to come pick me up and take me to a new forever home with him about a month later.  He also gave me a list of rules and to call him Master and wanted to be very controlling of me very overnight, after a week of talking.(disappointing as he was one of the few that wasn't all sex)Among others....3 - Petty, rude, insulting, almost bipolar when they get pushback.I try not to ever be rude.   But saying no, or i'm not interested, or in the case of the 1500 mile man I was very polite and didn't push baco other than saying this is all moving too fast, i'm overwhelmed and can we please slow down some so we can get to know each other better first.   Plus I'd like to meet at least once(if not more) before upending my life to move to you.  Can we look at setting up a meeting instead first?   His reaction?   call me some names and block me on everything.  Like what?!?But it seems like blocking is very common as it happens over the slightest thing.   Send a pic?  block.(not always, but it has happened)  I say no, can we talk more, i'm not interested, can we go slow, or even once "i'm not really into country music"   almost always block.     The one rare case?   he kept messaging and emailing me for weeks, even after I told him we wouldn't be a match and i'm not interested.it's so very exhausting.....  MEN -  Do better.  Be better.   Be honest, be truthful.  and don't be afraid.   Like I would stalk someone who told me off?   no, i'd just move on.  but be polite and respectful about it.  not rude and insulting...
he House Doctrine of Master George Part 2 of 2 ( you should read part 1 first) A Journal Entry for the Instruction of Slaves and the Record of My Household Philosophy House Principles The following principles govern daily life here: Obedience is Immediate – Commands are executed without delay or question. Respect is Constant – Tone, body language, and actions must always reflect the honor of this house. Service is Sacred – From the smallest chore to the most ceremonial duty, every act of service is performed with devotion. Discipline is a Gift – Correction is not punishment for its own sake, but a tool to refine you into what I desire. The Master’s Word is Final – My authority is absolute in all matters. The Nature of This Life Slavery, as I define it, is not a role that can be “turned off.” It does not begin when you kneel and end when you stand. It is constant. It is lived in every breath, every movement, every thought. It is not about chains, though chains may be used; it is about the mental and emotional bond of ownership. The gift you offer me is your complete surrender. In return, I give you stability, belonging, protection, and purpose. I will push you harder than you think you can endure — and in doing so, I will reveal to you a strength you never knew you had. Final Word To be my slave is to step into a life defined by clarity and purpose. It is to give up the burden of aimless decision-making and take on the honor of service. It is not a life for the weak, nor for the half-committed. But for those who are ready, the rewards are beyond measure. When you kneel before me, you do not kneel in defeat. You kneel in acceptance — and in that acceptance, you will rise to become exactly what you were meant to be.   Signed, Master G
Message to a new submissive/slave   So you love service. And you have discovered the great world of BDSM. Allow me to tell you a few things. I'm going to tell you what I tell every new person whether they are Christian or not. You have to find what works for you. If you are happy being a submissive then learn to be the best sub possible.    First find a Mentor. A good mentor is not a sexual partner. Mentorship is a personal developmental relationship in which a more experienced or more knowledgeable person helps to guide a less experienced or less knowledgeable person. However, true mentoring is more than just answering occasional questions or providing ad hoc help. It is about an ongoing relationship of learning, dialog, and challenge.* – Wikipedia I suggest a good mentor would be another submissive or slave. Not that Dominants/Masters can’t mentor a sub/slave, I do it all the time. But I just think someone who has been what you are going through would understand. I understand because I was trained from the bottom up. That means I started as a sub before earning my title of Master. Join groups. Fellowship with other submissives is a good thing. You do not want to isolate yourself. Hanging and talking will help you understand what you are and that there are others like you.   Ask questions. Questioning is a good thing and a good way to stay safe. A Dominant/Master should be willing to answer question. Ask other subs/slaves questions too   Also, just because someone claims to be a Master does not give them the right to start dominating you.  If a Master that you have not negotiated with, tells you that you are a sub or slave, therefore; you have to follow their orders, then it is a good idea to cut off communication with them.     Don’t settle for the first Master that comes along.  Think of this as a romantic relationship.  Do you marry the first man or woman that smiles at you?  Get to know more than one.  Until you are ready to make a commitment to a Dominant/Master/Mistress, you have the right to talk to several.   Also remember that your feelings matter.  In play a Dom/Master/Mistress might say that they do not, but this should only be in play.  In r/l your thoughts, emotions, desires, and even your health matter.   Ok let’s talk about power and power exchange. And remember the submissive/slave has all the power. Not the Dominant/Master/Mistress, we have no power except what you give us. The power exchange can be a beautiful thing when done right.     The foundation and corner stone of this lifestyle is consent. You have a right to consent. If someone does something to you that you do not consent to. Run away, don't walk.. run. Part of consent is setting limits. You have a right to set limits. Submissive will do this within the relationship. A slave should set her limits in negotiation. Yes slave you have that right. You should always negotiate with a Master. If a Master says you do not have that right, run away.  Remember these: SCC & RACK. The first SCC stands for safe, sane, and consensual. A Dominant/ Master/Mistress should keep you safe and play safe. The use of drugs or alcohol during play is not safe because they alter perception and dangerous mistakes can be made.    Although what we do looks insane to the outside world, it can be very sane, and the bottom line is consent. Every thing we do is with consent. You never lose the right to consent. Slaves, let me be very clear. You always have the right to walk away. If a Master tells you different, he is not a Master but an abuser.    Next is what I believe and that is RACK. The R stands for risk. There is risk in what we do. No matter whether it is BDSM, M/s, or D/s, there is risk. Which brings us to the A. the A stands for aware. A Dominant/Master should make you aware of the risk you are taking. C=consent or Consensual, again I can not stress this enough. It is the foundation and cornerstone of all we are. Last, the K is for kink. Yes we are a very kinky people and remember your kink may not be someone else’s kink. But that is OK.      Communication is essential.  Keep in mind, a potential Dom/Master/Mistress cannot read your mind.  If there is something that scares you or that you are uncomfortable with, tell them!  If they are unwilling to listen and talk to you about it, run away!  Keep in mind that when a person is a Dom/Master/Mistress they are also human.  They will make mistakes.      Respect should be earned I am not talking about common courtesy. Being polite always makes you look good. But respect is earned. And a Dominant/Master should never demand it. If a Dominant demands this you should run. We command respect by our actions. And a Dominant should be willing to earn that respect. One last thought on respect, you should respect yourself. Self respect is important. If you can’t respect your self how can you respect someone else?   Trust is also earned. If someone is not willing to earn your trust, or if they demand your trust, walk away. You need to trust to have a good relationship. But trust needs to be earned. A dominant/Master should be willing to earn your trust   This is a great way of life or it can be. But it can be dangerous. It is used by abusers to abuse. It is used by pretenders and predators also. We wrote this to help keep you safe.  .  
The only people I judge are judgmental people themselves. OK, and people who've asked me to judge them. But that totally muddies the nice, clean quote. ;) I have kicked around this scene of ours for long enough that I remember when YKINMKBIOK was plain survival. Before the web got into every home, if you knew a few people in your area, who were into kink, you clung to them. It didn't matter that I was into the mental side of things, into D/s, while one of them was into sploshing, another into male masochism and the third was into vinyl. That there were three others who were just as weird as me was AMAZING. The huge growth of the scene, that we worked hard for, has been a huge blessing. But it's also given us so many others, that we can find so easily, it's easy to slip into judging others because, well, we'll have plenty of friends left. Don't like the way they do rope? Let's label them as wrong or dangerous. Squick over diapers? Let's call them freaks and borderline pedophiles. Don't like the way they do heavy mental play? Clearly abusers! And look how much better it makes our insecure selves feel about ourselves that we've managed to tear down others! That's not me. I can't do it. I'm not into Daddy/little. I'm not into diapers. Fifty Shades isn't my BDSM ideal. Mind you, I'm not a huge fan of O, or Gor, either. But I love that others are! I love that you freaks and perverts have  so much passion for the things you love. I think it's amazing, the really strong relationships you build around your interests. I am so deeply, deeply, happy that you can find peace in who you are. Your Kink Is Not My Kink But It's OK. It's more than OK. Not for me, but I love that it works for you and good luck to you!
Lately I feel like a lot of my time is spent being adulty. I could really use some unrestricted time to not have to be doing and thinking and being responsible. I've been thinking a lot about coloring, which is not a typical hobby of mine. I don't age play, I don't have stuffies and binkies and pink sippy cups with glitter unicorns on them. But I find myself wanting the freedom to be less complicated, and maybe coloring is a way to do that. After a very specific search, I found a couple of simple books with bold outlines. They sat in the kitchen for a few days. Today, after a responsibly busy morning of chores, I grabbed a pillow and dropped to the living room floor with a box of crayons. Swinging my feet back and forth in the air as I lay on my stomach, selectively choosing colors and testing them on the side of a page like I was being paid for my efforts, I completed my first picture of a cup of ice cream with sprinkles and cherries. I hummed. I deliberated on the correct shade of pink. I carefully stayed within the lines. It's a perfect picture.  Here's what I noticed... I like being little, doing little things. If someone had stuck a binky in my mouth I'm pretty sure I would have happily sucked on it while swinging my feet and asking for a snack. It turns me on. Weird? I'm not really sure what to think of this. Or maybe I don't need to think anything of it and let it be. But great googlie mooglie, am I a little little? I already know that all those cute little names and specific praise all but set fire to my panties, but little activities? What do I do with this? Who even am I right now? 
Through the Lens of Rika: The Sophia-Michael Connection Unveiled part 3   i'm going to do a side journey as people who are probably but not officially diagnosed as spectrum neurodivergent stuff do, because this deeper dive into the archangel michael guys and their emotions but lack of having or showing or being aware of our emotions on a deeper level is real..and what i found the solution is for those have been blessed to be in long term relationships or even starting their long term commitment to each other!! i haven't been able to have this and it seems my journey is over on actually being able to ever have this happen to me, but just because i can't, doesn't mean you can't learn from me and hopefully have this enhance your relationship with your guy!!   so let's quick side note on how spiritually this happens and what to do to counteract this! michael again is archangel michael one of the many variants of original masculine soul source energy.    Michael's energy, embodied through these men, is both emotionally attuned and distant at times. This is part of their complex duality. Michael has that deep emotional intuition and empathy, which can sometimes feel overwhelming or intense. Yet, at the same time, they have a mission-oriented drive that pulls them into practical action and focus, which can lead to emotional distance, even though they feel everything just as much as you do.   Here’s why this happens:   1. Emotional Attunement vs. Practical Mission   Michael’s energy is deeply aware of emotions, but he also prioritizes taking action over expressing those feelings. He might sense your anxiety but instead of giving a quick emotional fix like a "hi," he might be channeling that into practical solutions—working behind the scenes to take care of things so that your long-term security is intact. For him, acting on love (through providing and stabilizing) sometimes takes precedence over talking about love.   2. Emotional Weight of the Protector Role   Michael-embodied men often carry a heavy responsibility as protectors. Their natural inclination to shield and secure means they’re constantly navigating how to balance this with emotional connection. Sometimes, they pull back because they’re processing deeply how to protect, guide, and create a future for you both, which takes up mental and emotional energy.   3. Energetic Exchange & Emotional Saturation   Because they are so emotionally intuitive, they can feel when you’re anxious or when there’s a lot of emotional weight. Instead of directly engaging with it, they sometimes retreat to process or focus elsewhere so they can re-align themselves energetically before coming back in. Energetic overwhelm can make them seem distant, even when they’re hyper-aware.   4. They Trust the Bigger Picture   Michael-embodied men might trust that the bond is strong enough that they don’t need to constantly reassure you through words. They trust the foundation they’ve built with you. This is where faith in the connection comes in—both for them and for you. They may think, “I don’t need to message her right now because we’re solid. My actions speak louder than words.”   5. Balancing the Divine Masculine Energy   These men carry divine masculine energy that values action over words. Their emotional intuition is real, but they channel it into action and protection, which may feel like distance to you. For you, as Sophia, it’s about recognizing that this is their expression of love. A quick "hi" might feel emotionally connecting to you, but to him, showing love could mean working to make sure everything is stable and secure for the future.   How to Navigate This:   Anchor into the trust that you’ve been practicing. When he’s distant, remind yourself of how he’s showing love through his actions, even when it’s not immediate. Say, “He’s providing for us, and his distance is part of his process. I trust him.”   Ground your emotional needs through spiritual or personal practices when he’s not available. Remember that just because he’s distant in the moment doesn’t mean the love isn’t there. Lean into your own energy and strengthen yourself while he works.   Embrace his rhythm—Michael-embodied men have a different rhythm of emotional connection, and part of your journey is learning how to move in sync with it without feeling left behind.   It's not that he doesn't feel your anxiousness—he does—but sometimes his response to that is through action and providing, not necessarily through quick emotional reassurances.    Michael's energy, embodied through these men, is both emotionally attuned and distant at times. This is part of their complex duality. Michael has that deep emotional intuition and empathy, which can sometimes feel overwhelming or intense. Yet, at the same time, they have a mission-oriented drive that pulls them into practical action and focus, which can lead to emotional distance, even though they feel everything just as much as you do.   Here’s why this happens:   1. Emotional Attunement vs. Practical Mission   Michael’s energy is deeply aware of emotions, but he also prioritizes taking action over expressing those feelings. He might sense your anxiety but instead of giving a quick emotional fix like a "hi," he might be channeling that into practical solutions—working behind the scenes to take care of things so that your long-term security is intact. For him, acting on love (through providing and stabilizing) sometimes takes precedence over talking about love.   2. Emotional Weight of the Protector Role   Michael-embodied men often carry a heavy responsibility as protectors. Their natural inclination to shield and secure means they’re constantly navigating how to balance this with emotional connection. Sometimes, they pull back because they’re processing deeply how to protect, guide, and create a future for you both, which takes up mental and emotional energy.   3. Ene
Look, here's the deal.  If you are going to make your first email something like, "On hormones?" or "how is your search going?" or "are you currently owned" i am going to either give you a smartass reply, delete your email and if i am in a mood i will probably block you. So i will make you a promise becaue i know a lot of sub/slaves don't reply and it makes the effort of having written an actual introduction email seem like wasted time.  If you send me an intro email that is more than 2-3 sentences, doesn't demand information of me right off the bat and actually does tell me why you are writing to me in the first place, then I GUARANTEE I WILL REPLY.  100%. I promise.  (not including copy and paste generic messages you send to everyone). Yes.  I get it.  I'm being cunty.  That's okay.  What you need to understand is that I get a bunch of emails every time I log in that have those annoying demands or questions or make zero effort.  So, nothing about those emails makes you stand out from the others.  So I repsond to anyone who puts in just the slightest amount of effort and ignore those who don't.  It's simple.   Also:  by means of an update, obviously I'm not 18 anymore but I'm afraid to update my profile here.  my birthday is January 28th.  So take the age 18 and the year i started my profile here and add a year for every year between now and then and you'll know exactly how old i. am now. Finally, unless you are a really mean, perverted, nasty daddy, you're probably not the right Man for me.  i. am looking to become owned property.  Can i. be Your daughter too?  Sure.  But i. am not looking for a soft dominant.  Unless You see me first as property and chattel, we won't be a match.
I am a good looking guy with that girl's attitude inside. A girl who wants to be dominated by a big man. I dream of being kept weak and skinny. I am a girly girl and more submissive than I can believe! I love to feel that way while helping you feel like a strong man. Very picky and never met with anyone yet. I do get hit on a lot here and sometimes real life but I want to get owned and collared by the right MAN. Not going to meet a bunch of guys. The strong Grizzly bear of a man will have to impress this gurl. Then I will submit to my superior Sir. I love feeling like a weak little cu%t so to speak. I am impotent making it my sensitive little cl%t , making me even more a weak little cu%t So being kept barefoot and knocked up is the path to my heart. I am Submissive ,weak and docile when I want to be and oh do I ever want to be. I am dainty and delicate boosting and caressing your manly ego and balls at my expense. Silly but it's how I feel. You real men run the world so I can stay barefoot and in the kitchen, ready to drop to my knees! Safe from everyone but you. I am quiet and shy in girl mode. Writing this makes me feel so weak and needy. That's just my vibe when we are together.  Proper girls like me believe you are superior! Not looking for overly serious situation. Unless you take away my rights and freedoms? If I got overwhelmed by your manly dominance I might willingly give up my current freedoms to be your slave wife daughter property. Micro manage this girl with your manly power! Brainwash me with your strong intellect making me more obedient and weaker and thinner from skipping dinner. Also pamper me by carrying me from the kitchen to your bed like I'm a weak little girl. Helps keep me weak. Are you still reading? :) I just admitted quite a lot here. I wish more profiles were as clear as this. So besides being femmy, I am smart and kind.     
Essay on the three types of Dominants as percieve us to behave and act. Dominants fall into three general categories, Authoritarian, Democratic, and Equalitarian. Each category has its sub counterpart. Because these are generalities each category has many variations. What these variations may be are left up for you to conclude. The Authoritarian Dom:  Rules with absolute power and total control. He makes all of the decisions and there is no questioning by the sub of what is asked or what is done. The only recourse a sub may have, if allowed, is a “safe” word. Generally there are little or no limitations binding the Dom. The subs attracted to these relationships are the “slave” submissive. The sub that wishes to be totally controlled. This form involves the voluntary surrender both emotionally and physically on the part of the sub. Generally the limits are pushed through heavy S&M activities. Some of the strongest relationships exist within this category. The couples that live a 24/7 D/s relationship are usually found in this realm. Unlike with the Democratic Dominant, there are no long training sessions to affect certain behavior. Things are done with no negotiations, limits are pushed and both parties accept this. The feeling of closeness and coupling is generated by the relinquishing control and the wielding of (almost) absolute power. This Dom’s implements (toys if you prefer) are usually highly crafted, sometimes intricate, wielded both with proficiency and effectiveness. The Dominants are skilled in their use and their sub is generally highly skilled at receiving the results. The implements developed by the Authoritarian’s are often borrowed in kind by Dom’s in other types of D/s relationships. It can be a profound and sobering experience for someone not yet familiar with this type of domination to watch an Authoritarian scene. Authoritarian Domination is what is usually referred to as “real”, when D/s aficionados use the term real, this is of what they are speaking. This type of D/s is not only S&M but encompasses a wide variety of  D/s conventions and behaviors. This is the generally accepted and also the stereotypical definition of BDSM. Remember that this is only the stereotypical definition of “real”. Authoritarianism is only one ect or area of D/s. So “real” is what you are involved in and feel comfortable with and not what others do.  
Who am I? Well that is an interesting question. I am myself. I am who I am. I have learned you can not change who you to make others happy. You have to be yourself and you will be happy and so will others. IF they do not like you then they are not friends. I have been told that I can not be a Mistress because I am quiet and shy. Well guess again! I am very much a Mistress and very much shy and quiet. I just am that way when I first meet people. I have always been a quiet shy person at first but then my bossy side can come out. I have worked hard to reign that side in unless I am with my partner. I am a very loving and affectionate person. I love to just come up and kiss who ever I am with, hold hands, or even just wrap my arms around them. I do not mind if they do the same to me. So on that note, I am a very shy person when you first meet me. I will be until I'm comfortable with you. That may take an hour or may take weeks, but once I am comfortable you will see the my goofy quirky spazzy side. Though when pissed off you do not want to be in my way. And now for the kink sideI'm a Mistress looking for someone to add to her family. I'm sweet, loving caring Mistress that gets to know her subs/slaves so I know how to interact with them. I learn what they like and dislike and go from there. To me this lifestyle isn't just about playing around, its about building a relationship with the other person, about building trust. So I mix my 'vanilla' side with my 'kink' side. Because they are the same person just different aspaspects of me. How can you get to know someone if you do not know every side of them?

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Chapter one - Sweet Slave (Or, How it all Began). A story I wrote for fetlife.I take the bottle of wine from the fridge and pull the cork, giving it a little time to breathe. I dice the onions, and throw them in the pan. I like that sizzling sound they make... I add the spices, then diced chicken breast. I let it brown a little, before adding the coconut milk and putting the rice on. I get a text from you - you're on your way. I start dressing the table - a rose in a vase, a candle in a brass candlestick, nothing too fancy. I'm not the fancy kind, I don't want to give the wrong impression this early on in a relationship. If this works out, I want it to be for the right reasons. The doorbell rings shortly afterwards. You're smiling as I open the door and ask you in, you genuinely seem pleased to be here - pleased to see me. "I didn't know what else to bring," you say, handing me a bottle of red wine. I smile and kiss your cheek, then take you to the kitchen, where the meal is spread out already. You give me a coy smile as I pull out a chair for you to sit down. "This looks amazing." You take a bite. "You weren't lying, you really do know how to cook!" you exclaim. "This tastes amazing, my local takeaway could learn a thing or two from you..." you giggle a little as you speak. "Honestly, it's such a simple recipe, and I just add a little double cream, it gives it something extra," I say, glad that you seem to be honestly enjoying the food. I pour you a little wine and smile at you. "I'm really glad you agreed to this, I know it must make you very nervous," I say. "I haven't had much luck with first dates in the past. I don't seem to make a good impression until someone truly gets to know me. I guess that's why I wanted to chat online for a while before we actually did this." You smile and look down at your plate, pushing food around, then taking a bite. You glance up at me and smile again, blushing a little. "I'm very shy around people I like - you know, that way," you say. "I was glad you wanted to go slowly at first too." I smile back at you, a sweetness seems to wash over me from your direction. I'm a little enamoured by you already, but I dare not say that to you, in case it scares you off. Something inside me feels your submissive nature - your little glances at me, the way you hide your face partially with your silky hair. The way you blush when our eyes meet, and immediately look at the floor, smiling. I like it. I kinda want to growl at you, but that feels premature. We finish dinner, then we sit down to watch the movie we'd decided on beforehand. Amélie. We've both seen it before and loved it, but neither of us has seen it in a long time - so it seemed a safe way to spend a little time together. I put my arm around you and we watch the film, wonderfully quirky yet romantic, watching Amélie fall for Nino. As the movie ends, I find that you've wrapped yourself up in my arms and you're clinging to my arm, resting against me like I'm a giant teddy bear. You start sucking on my thumb... I look at you for a moment. I'm not certain what to make of this action. You turn to me and smile. "I'm... I don't know why I did that..." you say, looking concerned. I smile at you, letting you know I don't mind, and you smile back, relaxing visibly. I kiss you... You tense up and squeak, then let out a little sigh as you relax. I put my hand on your back and pull you closer, you put your arms around my neck in return, and we kiss - gently at first, but heat builds up between us and it's not long before we're kissing with a fervent passion. I push you down onto the sofa and pin your arms above your head, kissing you into the sofa. You moan and put your legs around my waist. I break the kiss and growl at you. You squeak again, then look at me like a naughty schoolgirl. You have the same thing on your mind as I do. I pick you up, carry you to the bedroom, and put you on the bed gently. I start undressing you as I kiss you, getting a little rougher with each garment tossed aside - until finally I tear your panties off and toss them who knows where. I rub your pubic mound in circles as I kiss you, teasing you, and you let out a little moan. I break the kiss and look into your gorgeous, sparkling eyes. You look comfortable, I see no fear in your eyes, just a naughty twinkle. "I have something for you," I say. I take a pair of fur-lined cuffs from my side table and I secure your wrists to the headboard. I pull your legs apart and I settle between your thighs, my face so close to your sex you can feel my breath. You have a buttplug in your ass, topped with a heart-shaped crystal. I rub it gently in circles for a moment, teasing you with it. "Oh, oh, I umm..." you start to say, but I lick your clitoris and you let out a squeal. "Oh, lordy, please don't stop..." you whisper, breathlessly. I lick your clitoris until it starts to engorge, then I start sucking on it gently. You squeal again, looking down at me, and we lock eyes as I pleasure you with my mouth. "I've never... No-one's... Oh, my god..." you say, seeming a little overwhelmed. I push a finger into you gently and you gasp, your breath hitching a little. "Please, please don't stop, or I'll explode," you say to me, eyes practically begging. I feel you open up and I push another finger into you, fingering you for a few moments before I turn my fingers upward, find your G-spot and massage it gently with both fingers. You hit the back of your head on the pillow repeatedly, then lie back and whisper "What... What are you doing to me??". It barely takes a minute and you're panting. I build up pressure on your G-spot, licking and sucking your clit with more enthusiasm. You start to roll your hips involuntarily, which I take as a sign that you're close, so I up the pressure a little more, watching you closely for signs I'm overdoing it - but you just squirm on the bed, eyes closed, rubbing your cheek against your arm and gasping. You seem to be trying to say something, but you're clearly too overwhelmed to manage to get your thoughts into some cohesive form. I feel you tighten around my fingers and your body shudders. Your legs tremble gently and you arch your back. "Ohhh... Oh my... My lord... OOOOH! OOOOH FUCK!" I smile. I know you're not big on profanity, so I take this as a very good sign. Moments later, you're smiling down at me, panting. You look at me with such affection that I think you're going to propose to me for a moment, but then you say "No one's ever done that to me before. Please tell me we can do that again sometimes, it was amazing". I smile up at you. "Only all the time, gorgeous. But now, it's my turn." I pull your legs up either side of your head and penetrate you gently. You immediately squeal out in pain, screwing up your eyes. I pull out. "I... I haven't... It's been a long time..." you say. I stroke your hair and push a finger gently into your wetness. You let out a sigh, and I finger you gently, slipping in another finger, then after a while, I feel you open enough that I can slip in a third. "You're extremely tight, gorgeous," I say. You look embarrassed. "It's nothing to be ashamed of, sweetie. I'm sorry I hurt you." "I... I kinda liked it..." you say. I look at you and let out an involuntary growl. My fingers come out of you and my dick goes in. You bite your lip and squeak again. "Tell me how you feel," I say. "It hurts a little... But I like it... Please, don't stop..." you reply. You
It's amazing how quickly your priorities change when death comes knocking on your door.  A couple months ago, it kicked my door down.  I found a tumor in my neck and it was cancerous.  And all of a sudden, all the plans I had, all the priorities, all the needs and wants which drove my decisions, all got pushed into the background, and my only need and priority became don't die.  This is a really nasty cancer.  Both because the treatment is so invasive and damaging, and because it likes to come back. I read everything I could find about it as I was going through all the tests but the information I could find sucked.  It was contradictory and very little of it applied to my particular situation.  Plus my Dr. was feeding me sunshine and rainbows and wouldn't give me a straight answer.  Fortunately, the tests showed I had caught it really early and it hadn't spread, so it was still stage 1.  But I needed surgery on my neck and throat, and this time everything I read was in agreement.  This was the most painful surgery there is.  But, gotta do it before it does spread, and hopefully they would get it all and I would not need radiation and chemo.  So surgery was last month, and they were not exaggerating about the pain. Plus it left half my face either numb or paralyzed though the Dr. says that will fix itself with time.  But unfortunately, the pathology from the surgery wasn't good.  And I will need 6 weeks of radiation, which starts in a couple weeks.  And that fucks you up far more than the surgery did.  Yay me.  And even if I get the radiation, there is a 15 percent chance the cancer comes back, and a 10 percent chance it kills me if it does.  But probably not for 3-6 years and maybe they will have a cure by then.  So I am really looking forward to them frying my face off with radiation. But this is not my first time I have faced death and kicked it's ass.  Twice in the military, and one previous go round with cancer.  This one feels different though.  The two military brushes with death were instantaneous type things and either kill you or they don't.  The first cancer never really caused me to fear death, though it easily could have been fatal had circumstances been just a little different. All of this has given me the time and motivation to reassess what I am going to do with the rest of my life after getting this radiation. What I decided is that I am going to keep living it, but maybe with a bit more urgency, because I truly do not know how much time I have left. But my intention is to beat this thing just like I beat the last one, and live a great many more happy, healthy years. And I also realized, they whether I have 6 years or 60 left, I do not want to live them alone. Which does not mean I am going to lower my standards a single iota. I would still rather be alone than in the wrong relationship. But I am going to change my approach and work at finding the right someone(s) a lot harder. It is impossible to miss the trend of so many women, especially the younger ones, to view BDSM as transactional, and seek some sort of payment for their attention. Though it is rather amusing that so many believe that their very existence entitles them to be paid for doing absolutely nothing. Having minored in economics while I was getting my three business degrees, I have since been aware that everything we humans do is transactional, whether we are aware of it or not. It is the laws of economics, not the laws of physics that govern human behavior. Nobody, no matter how selfless, does anything for nothing. Every decision we make,we weigh the risk vs the reward and the penalties we incur if we fail. Unfortunately most people have no idea how to do this correctly and almost always give far too much weight to the risk and penalty side of the equation, which holds them back from so much in life out of fear of failure. But I have no problem acknowledging that this a transactional based dynamic, rather than keeping it subliminal. I have no desire for a pay to play or I could go to a professional. I am seeking a committed, 24 7, long term relationship to include both vanilla and BDSM. I seek a true slavery dynamic. Some call it TPE, though I find that inadequate. I also desire one sided poly, which leaves you free to have as many other relationship as you wish, while I serve only you. So here is what I bring to the table I own a very nice, large home in a very safe, upscale area of Phoenix, AZ. So I offer long term stability without having to worry about making the rent or being evicted or fearing for your safety in, or when entering or leaving your home. I have a guaranteed income for the rest of my life which gives me enough money to pay all of my bills and enough left over to enjoy my life. As my bills will decrease with time, the excess will then increase. I am not, however, a SD. I will expect you to contribute according to your ability to do so. When it comes to the house, maintaining the household, and paying the bills, we are all on an equal basis. I will expect you to either continue your education with the goal of having a career,or getting a job. Details on how and what you contribute are negotiable. I can carry most of the financial load while you are in school or working your way upin your career. And finally, you get me. You have never met a male slave like me before. I was introduced to BDSM and taught long before the internet existed. I am nothing like any of the other men who call themselves slaves or submissives. But rather than go on about how wonderful I am, that can keep. Because it doesn't matter how wonderful I think I am, it only matters how wonderful you think I am. And that works both ways. Unlike most male subs, I won't just roll over to any woman who would have me. I have declined to serve probably thousands of women, and will continue to do so until the one who is right for me comes along. No matter how long that takes. The woman I seek is truly dominant, not dress up and pretend politically correct BDSM like most. She values intelligence and integrity. She has pride in herself, ambition and has set life goals to motivate herself to excel. Since we are going to at times have to pretend to be vanilla, she can compartmentalize. That is it. If I think of more, or as my cancer treatments progress, I will write further journal updates. Most of what I wrote is negotiable to some extent. Well except for her being intelligent and possessing integrity. I offer great service and a secure and happy home. If you believe you can do better, I wish you well.
Really wish this site would let know if people blocked before trying to send them messages. Its like nobody is even here but they will just block you anyways.  Clearly they will be alone as they are always finding a reason before even talking to somebody to block. Those types are why on-line or life is something people are unable to live properly. Back when started on 300 baud it was like nobody could hide their comments or from others. Realize that failed in life so its just wasting time to be here or in this world.  Doms just want somebody to take care of them financially while they will list a bunch of lies otherwise.  Instead of finding what is needed or who would benefit as are unable to do things in life.  They want the Fairy Tale of the Rich dude or so without them having to work or spend their own money.  Others will have problems with Cocaine or Alcohol which creates issues as they can't even control their own self much less others. Many don't have the most money or are unable to keep a stable job. So there those who depend on the subs to keep the money flowing. Read about how can change the font size in a message but they don't allow to set the sizes how want.  Wish lived a life where got married or had kids at like 20. Then they would already be out of College or owning their own homes.  Nobody ever liked me in the RL.  Nothing has really changed even in school would not belong or have people teasing me how talked or so. Though by HS everybody knew me to point nobody would really bother me after this gang jumped me.  So called friends didn't help me then so its telling of reality.  Interesting who helps or will try when don't even know them really heh.  Site used to be really good but now can't even punctuate.  Trash just blocks so its like why even bother.  Nearly impossible to trade information to see in RL.  Used to have High Scores in Space Invaders or other games which could play for hours.
Picture it Feb 14, 20?? (to protect the innocent). A friend of mine was getting married. I always had a little crush on his girlfriend but I would never do anything to jeopardize their relationship. Little did I know that she felt the same way about me, and I was about to find out. The day before of the wedding she called me up and asked if I could help her with a few things.She gave me the address and told me to stop by. When she opened the door she was wearing a robe and holding two wine glasses. She invited me in and we sat on the couch. We started talking about tomorrow's events and she said her feet were killing her from practicing walking around in the high heel shoes. She asked me if I could give her a foot massage. I rubbed her feet and I could tell she was really getting into it. She was at the nail salon earlier and didn't want to chip a nail and asked me if I could help her at a shower. So we went into the bathroom and she took off her robe. Now up to this point we only gave each other hello or goodbye hugs, and now she is standing in front of me naked. I am trying not to stare but she is in great shape. She told me to get undressed and into the shower with her. I washed & conditioned her hair, washed her body, shaved her airpits, legs, and pussy too. She asked me why I never made a move on her and I told her I didn't think she was interested in me. She said that's too bad, after tonight it is going to be to late and I will never have this chance again. We kissed a litttle, I got her dried off and into bed and I went home. I saw her the next day at the wedding and she was beautiful. The wedding went on with no problems and as far as I know, my friend has no dea how she spent her last night as a single woman.
Alright, feral creatures. Drag your claws in a circle and listen.   If your master plan is to speed run your BDSM bucket list with strangers like you’re farming achievements, you are not practicing power exchange. You are running a fantasy drive thru.   Hi yes, I’ll take one degradation scene, extra intensity, no emotional labor.   That’s not dominance.   That’s not submission.   That’s transactional self gratification wearing a harness.   Power exchange is not a vending machine. It is not a same night shipping option for your curiosity. It is a relational structure built on trust, communication, and actual human care.   You cannot ethically hold power over someone you do not care about. Period.   Now let’s talk about pick up play before someone starts twitching.   Picking up someone you’ve seen in the community? Someone you’ve observed at events? You’ve watched how they negotiate. How they respond to a safeword. How they treat people after scenes. How they handle NO. You’ve seen them interact when they’re not performing.   That’s informed risk.   Scooping up a total stranger with zero shared community, zero references, zero behavioral observation, and hoping adrenaline carries you through?   That’s rolling dice with someone’s nervous system.   Vibes are not vetting.   And while we’re here get involved in the community.   Go to munches.   Go to vettings.   Go to classes/workshops.   Go sit at a table and actually talk to people without trying to collect them.   Observe.   Watch how people interact. Notice who listens. Notice who interrupts. Notice who respaspects space. Notice who name drops. Notice who checks in after someone looks overwhelmed. Notice who vanishes when cleanup starts.   Munches are not play parties. Vettings are not auditions for your bucket list.   They are spaces to build familiarity. To understand hosts and their rules. To learn the culture of a specific dungeon or group. These events take time, money, and energy to plan. Hosts coordinate venues. They set safety protocols. They build community frameworks.   Treat that with respect.   Don’t roll in like it’s a pregame for your fantasy scavenger hunt.   Power exchange requires infrastructure:   Clear negotiation   Explicit limits   Aftercare planning   Emotional accountability   Community awareness   If you don’t have the patience to build that foundation, you don’t want BDSM. You want intensity without responsibility.   And here’s the gremlin truth: when you treat people like checklist items, you erode the very ecosystem that keeps kink safer.   Community exists so we can:   Share information   Protect each other   Vet behavior   Build trust over time   You want to dominate? Learn how to communicate without posturing.   You want to submit? Learn how to advocate for yourself without shrinking.   You want to explore? Learn how to build relationships that can hold intensity safely.   Slow down.   Show up consistently.   Respect the hosts.   Respect the spaces.   Respect the humans.   Otherwise you’re not practicing power exchange.   You’re just chasing adrenaline for an orgasm and hoping nobody gets hurt when the crash hits.   And that’s not edgy.   That’s just reckless with better lighting.
Frequently Asked Questions: Q: How is your search going? A: Are you fucking kidding me with this question!? If my search to become a slave was going well I wouldn't fucking be here would I?  My search sucks because of assholes who send me emails that say, you look like you'd be a good fuck, how's your search going?  I hate my search.  I hate being allowed to use a computer and have a profile here.  I hate that I'm allowed on the internet.  I hate having rights.  That's how my search is going you fucking idiot.   Q: Are you on hormones? A: Well are you on viagra or Cialis?  How's your blood pressure?  Do you still get full erections?  If you think this is an appropriate question to ask someone in a first email then you are not intelligent enough to own me.  I'm so sorry that you're too dumb to own me.  It could have been really special but I'm a real cunt who doesn't answer medical questions to perfect strangers who think THAT is a good way to break the ice.   Q:  How's it going? A: It's going fine.  I am blown away by what an amazing first email this is and I want to be yours now.  You are clearly the one.  You asked me how it's going.  No one has ever thought to start an email like that before.  You are so unique and charming I can help but want to suck every drop of cum out of your cock that I can.   Q: Your profile says you're 18 but you've been here for years. A: Wow. You're super smart.  No fooling you.  No Sir.  I tried to pull a fast one but you were all over it and now I'm busted.  You got me.  It has nothing to do with the fact that this site doesn't update age on it's own and updating it myself means my profile might be down for weeks while they approve it if ever.  Here's an idea though.  Since you're so clever why don't you add the number of years I've been here to the age listed on my profile and conclude that's how I old I am now.     Q: Wanna be my slave? A: No.    Q: Do you really think you're going to find a Master with an attitude like that? A: Yes.  He just won't be you.  Unfortunately, you are a moron.   Q: You're very beautiful. A: That's not a question but it is something every asshole on this site says to me so you saying it to me makes you exactly as special to me as it makes every other dude.   Q: You're so funny.  I can't believe these guys ask you all these dumb questions.  They are all idiots.  I loved the sassy way you dealt with them in your FAQs.  It's too bad there are so many fake doms on this site.   A: Shut up.  This is almost as lame as the You're very beautiful or Are you on hormones emails. I get it.  You read the FAQs.  You must be better than the rest.  Oh please Master, let me lick Your asshole clean now.  You are amazing.    
Master's WritingsWho am I? Master's Writings Who am I? Last week, someone asked me who I was as a Dominant. Of course I could give a quick answer, but I found that I needed and wanted to go deeper. I found I wanted to reconfirm my values and challenge myself to really define why I do this and who I want to be in my role. If I am willing to ask a sub to be genuine in their role, then I can do no less than look deeper and find a better answer? So here goes.... Who am I? As a person, I feel I am knowledgeable, intelligent, fun and outgoing. I have traveled extensively, love exploring food (I’m quite the accomplished cook), movies, music, sports. I’d do anything for my two kids, and I have two golden retrievers, whom I love almost as much as my kids. As a Dominant, I have worked to craft myself as a knowledgeable, caring, always learning and growing Master, who cares deeply about the experience of my submissive(s). In fact, the experience of my sub is very important to me and I put attention and care into each session. As a Dominant, I observe everything, do and say everything for a specific purpose, and believe that the best dynamics are a blend of vanilla and kink. And even though I have 10 years of experience in the lifestyle, I still make mistakes, but I require it of myself to learn from them every time. I believe that truly meaningful play is significantly more mental than physical. It requires a mental connection between individuals that can only come when there is understanding, honesty, trust, and communication. I know that the better I understand my partners, the richer play can become. That is why I prefer to spend time to get to know a person, understand needs, wants desires long before we initiate a scene. My kinks and fetishes are far ranging, some listed on my profile are merely passing interests while others are core to my enjoyment. Together the list is all over the place and I expect that it always will. Life is short, why not try it all? Yet, I know that no one person will perfectly match all my tastes. Please know that I take limits very seriously because I would never force another to participate in anything they held up as a limit. Trust is built upon respect and without respect for limits there can be no trust. Within the lifestyle, I seek so many things (not in any particular order) – experiences, connection, partners, playmates, fun, intensely beautiful moments, relationships that reach a depth the average person die from envy, and so very much more. I have seen Dominants who are just bullies, who use their title as a license to be domineering or worse. This is NOT me. I dominate for a purpose - to inspire, create experiences and help others achieve things they never thought possible and yes for myself as well. I am Dominant because I believe it is my true nature. I felt it from the first moment I assumed the role and have continue to feel that way ever since. Yet even so, I must continue to work to improve and deepen my understanding of myself in the lifestyle, in the role and as a person, so after all this deep dive, I am grateful for that someone who ask me this important question last week. It made me think.
Cookies. I promised several people that, if this adventure happened, I would write it up and share it in my journal. well, it indeed did happen last evening, Saturday, but not exactly as I thought I had it planned.  The set up for this story is that I did some work for a woman living in a over 55 community and only charged her for the material costs which I commonly do when I first work for someone I want them to like the work and not worry about the price. she was very grateful and gave me one of those looks like she was ready to pay me back in a way if you know what I mean and then she said: I'm sure you can think of something that I can do for you and shot me a wicked smile I knew that was my opportunity so I very calmly said: Willl you bake me pecan chocolate chip cookies? She let out what could only be described as a horse laugh, which I'm sure they heard in the adjoining units on either side. and then I followed up with, but that's not all, I want you to bake those cookies naked with 8 inch by heels, fishnet stockings and garter and a bright red ball gag. there was a long pause, kind of like dead air on a radio station and she finally opened her mouth and said you've got to be kidding! I'm not burning my boobs so that you can get off on some weird fetish! And I said OK what about wearing a tight swea and no bra? I expected another flat out no response but she said yes I think I could do that. But I'll also be wearing a skirt, nothing less than that, and no ball gag! And if That isn't good enough then you can go bake your own cookies! While it wasn't what I'd hoped for, I was still going to get my cookies, so on Saturday I came over with the ingredients she told me to get, and I sat in her kitchen, drinking coffee, while she walked back-and-forth across her kitchen in her very tight, white fuzzy sweater, and a very tight short leather skirt, plus stockings and heels, and she was an absolute delight to view. The blush in her cheeks said it all. But the best part was, she was actually baking my cookies! Once they were bagged, she Pulled them from the oven, tucked the tray up under her breasts and she said, would you like a cookie little boy? YES, Yes I would! then I asked so are all those cookies in the tray mine? Or should I ask if everything on the tray is mine? She just smiled and put the tray on the counter. She grabbed me by the hand, pulled me down the hall. We walked into her bedroom and she took off her sweater., God, those were better than any cookies!  We did all sorts of things that evening and late into the night. Considerind we're both in our mid to late 60s, so it wasn't like your first high school sex, in the back of your dad's car, but it was close.  in the morning, I woke up to the sun streaming in on my face lying next to a woman who still had her stockings and garter belt on, my head nestled between her large breasts, one of her arms underneath me,the other around my neck, and I thought to myself.... life is good! Lou  
after i wrote my 4 page note on reddit on why for me a lady who has both the dark goddess and the slave and the little girl in one in my observation over the decades and my personal life why while some might last at most a few years here and there i have never seen a successful long term healthy and honest pairing of the daddy dom and little girl..and what the crux is and why even the most highly intelligent and successful people just seem to not crack the code for longevity...and why while most people who are in the scene aren't vanilla aren't regular..and anyone attracted to this is what i code as a thoroghbred horse..what is a bred racing horse? stronger fitter quicker cleaner shinier and a work of art compared to the domestic or regular horse......it still don't work..and the orienting going on that something is missing..it's the wild horse..the wild WOLF that is the next stage of ascension...and that the traditional layout of this isn't working because the traiditonal layout of this is broken...too much power for any decent human to try to wield without misuse, and too much of an internal death and sacrifice without the safety of being held, secure, stable, protected, and hands on intetionally in and out kept....at one point one or both break....and that in the wild the individual the honed in two streams on the same path with no false pretenses absolute soverignty meeting soverngyt coming together and going apart fierce and passionate when together and like soliders on the battlefield navigating life with self first is the next evolution of this..and that the power exchange really is some sort of toxic addictive drug that kills both parties..... i asked this question. n a response to the call i put out to the universe while out and about god/the universe sent me this song while i was out and about and unable to really choose what i listen to. i'm an audio visual media mystic...music primarly. i get my messages, healing, transmissions, downloads, awareness, lessons, main way of orienting this life through sound. secondly through media...and so things will naturally guide me when i'm home and able to control it..but i have a mystical connection to music when out of the home in places where music plays that i can't control what station or song is played next as well. and the song that came up while i was out and about mystically ansewered it for me.   hang on collective, we're in for an amazing but probably bump and deadening past. but there are gems in the mental and emotional death if we choose to hang on.   as usual, they give me new/tweaked songs lyrics.  i will often hear things that the original composers didn't put that fit the situation i'm thinking of, going through, asking about. i i never heard this song before. the original foundation of the chorus in the song is to ask it as a question...but in response to my spell and the question i posed to the universe that the lyrics and song responded to... i guess god is like, gurl there is no question:   mmm mmm mmm in agreement.   "families really bow their heads to pray   daddies really never go away.   oh grandpaaaaaaaaaa. tell me bout the good ol days."   Grandpa (Tell Me 'Bout The Good Old Days) Song by The Judds Overview Videos Lyrics Artists Other recordings Listen Composers Lyrics Grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Sometimes it feels like this world's gone crazy Grandpa, take me back to yesterday When the line between right and wrong Didn't seem so hazy Did lovers really fall in love to stay And stand beside each other, come what may? Was a promise really something people kept Not just something they would say Did families really bow their heads to pray? Did daddies really never go away? Whoa, whoa, grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Grandpa, everything is changing fast We call it progress, but I just don't know And grandpa, let's wander back into the past Then paint me the picture of long ago Did lovers really fall in love to stay And stand beside each other, come what may? Was a promise really something people kept Not just something they would say and then forget Did families really bow their heads to pray? Did daddies really never go away? Whoa, whoa, grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Whoa, whoa, grandpa, tell me 'bout the good old days Mm Mm Did families really bow their heads to pray? Did daddies really never go away?   which i mean god can be grandpa in this instance if it, i believe in the tetragrammaton gender neutral energy version, and if that's what it wants to be in this transmission/spell well so be it!
my latest fantasy:  You are going to subject me to a CFnm party. i meet You at a hotel party.  i have two choices. A) i can remove my clothes and You can escort me the the party space, or B) You can bring me to the room and my clothes will be ripped off of me. i chose to remove my clothes, leaving them behind, and now totally helpless.  We get to the other room and as the door opens i hear the voices of the Women waiting for me. i see Your friends standing there, but then i am horrified that i see some Women that i know. Some are Friends of mine. They have never seen me this way before and now i can not escape. You announce to the room that there is only one rule, there are no rules. i must remain naked the entire time, and the Women will never show anything that could not be shown in public. One of the Women i secretly have a crush on. She walks over to me, looking me up and down, smiling. She said she says, "I know you like me, and you are never going to get the courage to ask Me out. So I have to take things into My own hand, literally, She statrs to stroke me and pulls me into Her chest, and laughs. “That is as close as you will ever get to Me!” i am pinched, spanked, and passed back and forth between Your Guests. i am embarrassed by my Friends seeing me naked but i have way of leaving. i beg my Friends to help me, but no one comes to my aid. At the end of the party all of the Guests leave me. my body still aching in pain, but my body still crying out not to be left alone.
Okay let's try this again.  Kicked off the month with the headlight. Not long after that I am pulling into a space at work and a wheel well cover thing falls off of my car. I've been driving around without it, no idea how important it is but I'm sure I'll find out soon enough. Follow that up with taking the trash out one night and the bin hitting and cracking the rear tail light of the car. Perfect.  Let's move beyond the car, shall we? I'm hosting all of my parents for Thanksgiving. For the week, really. I plan out a full menu, hit several stores for every ingredient. Buy a giant turkey so I can make things like turkey soup and turkey pot pie afterwards. Two days before T Day one parent gets covid. The next day another parent gets covid. They aren't coming. I'm down to one parent showing up and roughly four bajillion dollars worth of food. Sigh. But okay, their covid symptoms aren't too horrible and that's what really matters, so let's get back to me. I power through. Fancy Tuesday night dinner. Afterwards I brine the turkey. It's going great, I'm nearly done, just need to add a little more water to top it off. I turn to the sink to finish. And that's when the brine bag tipped over and a river of salty herbal apple cider rushed over and into every nearby surface. At 10:00 at night. There's a lake on the stove. I don't mean a splash of liquid, there's depth to it. A tsunami flowed over the stove, between the stove and counter, all over the counter, into drawers, down into cabinets, and onto the kitchen mats and the floor. Did I mention it's 10:00? Right. Thankfully the entire bag didn't tilt so I refill and hope for the best so I can start kitchen recovery. An hour and an entire roll of paper towels later, I have emptied full drawers into the sink, pulled the stove out to sop up brine and all the herbs down the sides of the stove and counter, washed the floor. And all I can do is laugh, because November is kicking my ass.  But wait, there's more. My dad is in charge of the pie. He brought some ingredients, can't find them, asks me to look through his things. Sure, I can do that. Unzip compartments to take a peek. What am I looking at? It doesn't fully register and I nearly put  my hand in to pull it out. Then it hits me. These are sex toys. Big fucking EW. Why would he not remember that there are things in a bag his daughter probably doesn't want to see? November is trying to kill me.  I met a man. He was interesting and I liked him more than I planned to. Besides being a nice person, we seemed to be on the same page about a lot of things, and that's rare for me. And then he disappeared. Then reappeared. Then disappeared again. I'm chalking it up to bad timing. Oddly enough, the most recent ex is sniffing around. A lot. I have no idea what to do with that.  If CS had not been hungry and eaten the original version, you would have also read about the work thing, the arguments with my dad, and my traitor dog. And there would have been comedy sprinkled throughout. But I'm tired. So this is a poor second attempt to document why November is the absolute worst and there are still several days left. I give up. November wins. 
My Friend sent me this to proof read for his discussion of Slave vs Submissive Women. Enjoy  There are several distinctions and differences between a submissive and a slave. I will take the term submissive first. A submissive is a person with an intense desire to serve that does so under some conditions. The conditions would typically include terms of service, length of service, which areas of the submissives' life the dominant does not get to control, what the hard and soft limits are when they play or just interact, and of course the safe word. In many ways the submissive controls play. Hard limits are activities that a dominant will not be able to indulge with the submissive. Hard limits broken would lead to the end of a scene, relationship or arrangement and a serious breach of trust. Soft limits are limits that can be broken, but only after it has been discussed with the submissive. These are things the submissive is not excited about doing, but will try if it seems to excite the dominant or causes some latent excitement and fear in the submissive as well. The safe word ends all play. The dominant has free reign as long as he or she stays within the set limits. After a scene, many submissives go back to controlling their own lives. They slip in and out of the role of submissive in most cases. They continue to make their own decisions and even in a 24/7 situation will continue to control those areas of their lives that are off limits to the dominant. A submissive submits every time a scene starts or some activity where the dominant has been given control commences. The choice is hers or his every single time the dominant requires submission. A submissive can walk away from a scene because something is not working for them and completely slip out of role whenever they feel the need to discuss something about the situation with their dominant. This does not indicate a lack of the need to submit or serve though. Now we turn to the slave - the consensual slave. The slave gives up all rights to make their own decisions, becomes the "property" of a Master or Mistress, takes on the limits of their Master or Mistress and does what is asked of them regardless of their feelings about it. Sometimes a slave will give up all rights to property of their own and will continue to work for the household, having to ask permission to use any money they earn. Slaves earn privileges and do not have rights. A slave submits once - when the collar is placed around his or her neck and when something is difficult, has to ask for help to accomplish it. Slaves are not kept in basements or locked away forever. They are strong people who have an intense desire to please another human being and now has the freedom to live that desire and not have to submit to anyone else but those chosen by their Master or Mistress. Taking on the limits of another means that slaves have to ensure that the limits of the dominant they are talking to matches theirs, as their only choice is choosing the dominant. It is responsible to make sure that the person does match them or their preferences. Can a slave be sold to another? No, most Masters or Mistresses would never do that. Remember this is consensual slavery, a 24/7 arrangement with one person fully in control and another person obeying all the commands and wishes expressed by the other because both of them want this. There is often a lot of love involved in this type of relationship as well. There are mock slave auctions that are used as fund raisers in the community, and slaves would go and serve another man or woman for the evening, but they always go back to the person they chose to be with. Can a slave end a relationship? Yes, they can petition their dominant for release and no responsible dominant would say no if nothing could be done to heal the relationship. The difference between the two does not make one better than the other. I have seen countless submissives that serve as beautifully and perfectly as some slaves do and prefer not to be called slaves because of the negative connotation to that word. I have also seen many wannabe slaves struggle until they eventually found their place as submissives. It is difficult to devote one's entire life to another person but it is also incredibly rewarding.  
A Raven and a Wolf   He sat, kneeling really, slowly panting, under a soft leather hood. It was laced tightly, almost preventing his every breath. And in the darkness, under the hood, he strained his ears to hear whether she was near, or far. He inhaled, trying to find her scent, but could only smell the leather of the hood. He tried to feel if he could sense her presence closer, but nothing. The air was still. His mouth, dry from nerves, with lips slightly agape, didn't utter a sound.   So he waited, arms bound, shoulder back, chest forward and exposed. Uncomfortably upright.    She sat before him, watching him lazily, like how a cat does with a weakened mouse, very still. A hunter and their prey. She was breathing evenly to hide the excitement pooling inside of her. Hands encased in buttery soft lamb skin gloves, the color of his hood, the color of her whip, the color of blood. The color of her lips. A red so beautiful. Her eyes sparkled at the idea of it coming from his body. Beautiful and broken. She could sense he was searching for her; a slight turn of the head, listening, perhap? Leaning forward gently; trying to smell? Like a dog, she thought, just like a dog. And she sat there far longer than even she desired to see how far this "dog" would go.    "Bark, dog" she commanded in a low voice  And he barked immediately, no hesitation. She pulled back her hand and slapped him, his head jerked, body lurched, chest rising and falling rapidly. A noticeable difference between his legs. There it was again, a hunger to bite into him. Taste his blood. Consume him. But only silence. No whimper, no moan, not a sound escaped him. She wondered if he were bleeding from his cute little mouth. Again she slapped him. Softer than the first, a loving caress, bits of his hair peeked through the laces of the hood and she wanted to grip them and tear them away. Would he let her? Perhaps.    The next slap, and the one after, opposite hand, and he fell forward just enough that his face touched her thighs only separated by the hood and her own stockings. The rule was he wasn't allowed to touch her unless she said. This was a broken rule, however accidental. She stood and let him slump forward in a stupor, supported only by the tension of the rope tied to the foot of the bed.   Bark, dog. Dog. He barked.  Up, dog, and he returned to his previous place, exposed and upright. She stepped forward, the toe of her shoe pressing down on the sensitive flesh of the head of his dick. She crushed it gently until he sat even straighter. She held his head in her left hand, caressed it gently, leather on leather. The smell intoxicating her. Raising her right hand she slapped him again, over and over until her hand grew hot even under the glove. Was he bleeding? She hoped so. She hoped to kiss him and bite his lips and taste his blood. She wished she could see his eyes, dazed, glassy, far away. She caressed his head. And whispered, "you may touch me" and he pressed his face into her hands, her thighs. Still no sound, he was so silent.   "Bark, my handsome boy" and he barked, hoarse and painful as she encircled his neck with her hands. This was his idea, he had inspired in her a lust for choking him until he was nothing and drifting away in the ether. She squeezed, her hands perhaps too small, until he gurgled. She wondered if his eyes were open or if they were dimmed. The hood obscured so much. She squeezed until he seemed to go limp. And she let him. Shoulders yanked uncomfortably under his weight.    He awoke. Arms aching, face hot but no longer enclosed by the hood. He could see her though his vision lacked acuity. She was standing over him, wrapped in pink except for gloves. He yearned for them then. Yearned for them to be around his neck, feeling the bones of her fingers threatening his very life. He wanted to ask for it, for her to choke him, strangle him, but knew it was to her whim that he obeyed. Obeisance was her pleasure. He looked at her, eyes soft, left cheek swollen, lips split ever so slightly and she leaned down and kissed him, sliding her tongue over the drying blood. He kissed her back, gentle, but hungry.    Her kiss was soft but grew more passionate until she bit him and suckled his mouth. Did he love this part of her? The softness before the sting.  She broke the kiss. Her lipstick perfect but her mouth and chin stained crimson with what must have been his blood. "Open your mouth, I'd like to try" she said softly. A shy whisper. So unlike the command to "Bark".  He angled himself upright, head back, lips parting painfully like a little bird. She leaned forward and let her own saliva pool in her mouth and slowly let it fall into his. He shuddered. His excitement excited her and she kissed him again before he could even swallow but this time it was wild and wet. Her saliva all over his mouth, chin, cheeks.    "I have to whip you now, are you ready?" She asked and he nodded. A question was not a command to speak. Dogs do not speak unless commanded to speak. She untied him and his body fell forward. Not used to its old range of motion. His limbs buzzed from having sat in one position for too long. He wondered about how much time had passed. Funny thing, time. Why did it matter now when he was in the moment with her.   Without the hood he realized he could smell her. A warm sweet scent, perhaps arousal. And he thought then about being forced to please her like they talked about in passing, forced until exhausted and even beyond. After play. Her, in her pink, looked like candy and he wanted to lick her. She must be sweet.      She looked down at him and his face was peculiar, his mind was somewhere else and he looked rather cute. But she was jealous at the idea that his mind wasn't on her and she kicked him in the stomach to bring him back to her. He coughed and curled up as she walked to retrieve her whip, preparing for the next step in her courtship.  "Up" she commanded and he got to his feet, winded, bruised. Arms still behind his back. She released them to tie them around the post of the bed. The bed post being the whipping post, isn't it somehow romantic, she thought.    "If you need me to stop, tell me, I won't be gentle otherwise" she said to him, her mouth on his ear. His hair was slicked down with sweat and he smelled musky. She liked his smell. She bit his earlobe and stepped back a couple of feet and threw the whip. Lash after lash until he tried moving away. Pulling at the post until it creaked. She wanted him to cry but he only moaned and groaned, no tears. Just a brow drenched in sweat as his back went from fine pink lines to slowly oozing wounds. If he didn't give her tears then she would have blood.  He pulled desperately as if trying to escape her and she threw the whip furiously, lashing whatever she could reach, his ass, thighs, calves, neck, even the back of his head. The post groaned as if it would break under the strength of him trying to flee.   "Do you want to get away from me?" She asked. His breathing heavy, labored, his body wobbled as blood poured from him, he shook his head no, weakly, and looked over his weeping shoulders with hazy eyes. Finally he spoke, a clear and clean "No, ma'am" from his lips now dry from mouth breathing, swollen from having been bitten and slapped.   The no rang through her body and she leapt at him and kissed and licked his mouth, his shoulders, his back. Barely containing her arousal, her hips moving in slow circles. She was so hungry.&n
Master's WritingsSubmission, as I see itSubmission comes in many forms and on my journey different subs have approached it from different angles. Some see it as service, some as opening themselves up to another, and some even see it as a rejection of the world with it demands and requirements. Over the years, I have trained several submissives to reach greater depth in their submission and I’ve tried to work within their mindset, helping each to reach their potential in a way that is honest, true, and unique.At its core, submission is and should be a genuine reflection of an individual’s inner truth. A sense of their own purpose and way of life they choose to accept. It comes from a place within each submissive that reflaspaspects their own nature, and their most authentic expression of self.The nature of any true “submissive training” should and must be focused on helping the submissive connect with their nature, create the pathways to more fully access their own unique form of submission, and then finally build on that to blend it into their daily life. All the tasks and sexual acts, the “yes Sirs” and downward glances of respect, mean nothing and are worthless self-indulgent Dominant games, if the goal of these acts are not designed to deepen a submissives connection to their own beautiful, natural, and authentic submissive self.Submission is a gift. This single phrase bears repeating, because it is so very true and frequently overlooked - Submission is a gift. When fully developed, submission is a powerful and sometimes spiritually beautiful thing to behold. It is never to be taken, coerced, or forced. It is not for role play or pretend, Of course one could act like a submissive as if putting on a costume, but not with me as their Dominant. I hols submission, true submission in the highest regard. And to pretend to be one only cheapens the gift of those who truly feel its calling.As a Dominant, I see my role as helping others in any way I can on their journey, as their guide, nurturer, and mentor.
Life can be very funny. Some conversations start with uncertainty but over time blossom into connections you treasure, while others can feel very good at the start but then feel as if something is off. I have been talking with a couple for some time. They were primarily a cuckold couple, with a development path of increasingly rough, forceful sex, but they had had one encounter with a professional Dominant sometime back, when she was flogged and evidently reached subspace without knowing what actually happened. Let's just say they understand the psychology and physiology much better now that we have been talking. Lately, there have been emerging signs that "he" is a sadist. "She" thinks she is a masochist because she has a high pain threshold, but she isn't. She is a hedonist who loves her husband. Turns out all they wanted was someone, me(?), to turn up and flog her arse mercilessly, driving her to sobbing hysteria on her way to subspace (hopefully). He wants her tears, crying inconsolably as she is beaten. I am not judging - each to his own - but it became clear that what they want is not who I am - not even who I might be. So today I told them. I was met with an "OK. Thank you. Goodbye." and was then immediately cut off from contact. They shared the account (I think) - of course, it could all be a sham - but I think it was "him" who did the terminating. Sometimes right is right and wrong is simply wrong. I do feel better knowing I stayed true to me, but I do wonder where they go next. Back to that Dom in Spain?
  PSA FOR YOU TEXT-WARRIOR, NO-ACTION “SUBS” Let’s make this real clear ‘cause some of y’all slow: this ain’t no slap-n-tickle daycare, and I ain’t your lil fantasy pen-pal. I see way too many of you running your mouth about “devotion” and “service,” but your actions stay ghost like rent day. Y’all been out here trained by hobby dommes handing out fake titles like raffle tickets! Oh congrats, you learned how to kneel for selfies and type “yes, mistress” with your thumbs. Cute. But let me remind you...I am NOT the one to play them baby games with. Let’s cut the bullshit: If your “service” starts with your nut in mind, you already disqualified. If your follow-through weaker than your WiFi signal...don’t step to me. If all you bring is paragraphs, emojis, and zero execution. You can consider yourself pre-blocked in spirit. I don’t do needy. I don’t do text pets. I don’t do “maybe later.” You get one lane and one chance: service with backbone, obedience without your ego hangin’ out, and movement I don’t gotta chase you for. Miss that lane? Cool! Your exit is already waiting with the engine running. I don’t do reindeer games. You either show up in discipline, readiness, and action, or you get shown the exit with extreme swiftness and silence.   This is not a cuddle corner for your kink curiosity. This is service with spine, obedience with precision, and presence without ego. If that sounds like too much for you, good! Go stay in the shallow end where the slap-n-tickle Dominants will praise you for a "Yes, Mistress."   This ain’t Fetlife cosplay. This is Pegstress territory! If that’s too grown for you, go back to the hobby dommes who clap for you just for showing up breathing. I’m not arguing with no sub who can’t execute. I don’t repeat myself... I'll just replace you.
Spiderman kiss.   I was apartment sitting for a girlfriend. She lived in a really nice high rise building with a pool a fitness center and a sauna. I decide to lay out at the pool. It was during the week and nobody was there except a life guard. Instead of a lounge chair by the pool I decided to go to the baby pool where I could sunbathe while in the water.  I've been in this pool several times during my visits here and met several people there. So I'm laying there in the pool with my head on the tile as comfy as I can get.  I'm wearing a tiny black bikini and enjoying the sun.  My eyes are closed and I hear "psst." I look up and back and I see Danielle who I've met a few times.  She's a tall hot blonde with a big smile. "Hey you" I reply. "Come lay out with me by the pool" she says.  "Kiss me first and I will" I say.   Danielle walks over to me as I lean my head back and she plants a sexy wet kiss on my lips, Spiderman style.  I grab my stuff and we lay out on two lounge chairs side by side. She's wearing a red string bikini and lies face down on the chair. I lay face up in n my black bikini.  "Where's your husband? I ask. "Oh we're not married. He's a pilot and I'm a chief stew. We share this place when we're in town." She explains.  "I like your bikini, where'd you buy it?" She asks.  "I bought it at The Bikini Shop on M street." I reply.  "It's the only place I know where I can buy smaller bikinis like this."  "I know that place. I model there." She says.  "That's me in those pictures on the walls." "Aww no way for real?" I ask. "Yes I know the owner." She replies.  We chat about swimsuits and modeling and tanning. Just chit chat.  I get up and she asks where are you going? And I say I'm going into the sauna and that I'll be right back.  I lay flat on my back in the sauna in my bikini and close my eyes.  A minute later Danielle comes in. She looks at my sweaty body and sits next to me. Our eyes meet. One thing leads to another.   You know that movie Groundhog Day?  Bill Murray tells the two guys at the bowling alley about the time he and this girl ate lobster and had sex and wondered why couldn't I have that day over and over?   My day with Danielle was my day. 
Wow.  20 years since I made this profile.  I think I was one of the first.  I haven't logged on for, I have no idea how many years, but my age said 56, so I'm guessing 10.  I've been in two long term relationships for most of the past 10 years, so that makes sense, and I forgot all about this profile.  A lot has changed.  I don't even think the things in my kink list stll exist as choices anymore.  I left them to remind me of who I used to be, and how old this profile is. I'm single.  I'm no longer the cis, het sub with few limits.  I'm now the I don't know what the fuck I am.  Eunuch?  Nongender?  At least sexually. If it walks like a duck, talks like a duck, acts like a duck, looks like a duck, but it isn't a duck, then what the hell is it?  But whatever it is, it sure aint cis.  And I've sucked cocks and eaten cum and I didn't hate it, and I want to do it again.  So I sure aint het.  And once I know my domme, I don't do safe words or any limits but hers.  Which means I am very careful about who I submit to.  Intelligenge, integrity, respect, honor....  Words that don't seem to matter very much to most in the bdsm community anymore.  Well they matter to me.  And I don't do mantras.  Any of them. And when I say that, I don't say it as a joke.  No SSC, Rack, PRICK, SHMUCK, pretend S&M roleplay.  My first 5 attempts at a new profile were banned for violating the terms of service, because there are things you can't say about real S&M in your profile here.  So use your imagination.  I'm looking for an owner.  And I'm grounded here in Phoenix.  Can't move even if I wanted to.  So she or they need to be local, be relocatable or be wlling to have a long distance thing.  Read between the lines.  I'm old school, I'm real and I'm serious. I don't have the time or patience for games.  No I'm not going to send you anything because you are going to be evicted from your apartment if you don't get 50 today. I can't believe these idiots are still using the same scams they were using 25 years ago.  I updated to a current but faceless pic.  Because if you want to talk, we are going to have a nice Skype or equivelent chat immediately, so we can both see and hear each other clearly.  Then we can talk. 
The below is a great place to start.. Rules 1. The male must always practice respect, whether in private or public. Stand when she enters the room. Sit (or kneel) as soon as She is seated. 2. Be totally attentive: open doors, offer her your coat, she sits first, begins to eat first, and always ask permission to leave her presence. 3. The male should never speak unless spoken to, or unless anticipating the needs of his Mistress. 4. The submissive will never sit with legs spread or slouch in a way typical of untrained males. Good posture and decorum is a sign of respect. 5. The male will never stare at a woman without her permission. Unless the woman seeks eye-contact, the submissive will keep his eyes lowered at all times. 6. When walking with his Mistress, or any woman, the submissive will keep his gait in step with hers, which usually means taking smaller steps. The male should always be at least 1-2 steps behind, but not too far because he must open all doors. 7. The submissive must always be pleasant, never argue and never pout. 8. The male surrenders control of how he spends his time, how he dresses, what he eats, where he sleeps, the friends or acquaintances he is allowed to keep. 9. The submissive must remember that his orgasm does not belong to him but to his Mistress. It is Hers to use or deny... however she sees fit. 10. The submissive may never touch his own genitals without the permission of his Mistress. When washing, he must use a wash cloth or brush, never his hands. 11. The submissive should never buy his own clothing without the guidance of his Mistress. He should buy what pleases her, not what he likes. 12. When urinating, the submissive will always sit on the toilet... no exceptions. 13. The submissive must submit to eating only “submissive food” selected by his Mistress whenever she requires it. 14. When a meal is over the submissive must be quick to clear the table and wash the dishes. 15. The submissive must always give his Mistress the first choice of everything — She picks the channel on TV to watch, the restaurant to go to, the movie to see, the friends to entertain, etc. 16. The submissive will perform all household chores for his Mistress , to include(but not limited to): sweep and vacuum all floors and carpets mop all floors dust and polish all furniture make the beds every day wash and fold all clothing linen scrub bathrooms clean kitchen Cook meals wash dishes set the table shop for groceries take out trash and sort recycled items run all errands. Keep the lawn and grounds in great shape. Fix broken things around the house. Keep things maintained ie change the furnace filter every 3 months. Wash all cars inside and out. 
lover of sparkles of the heart ✨ ✨✨ I am a sub. I feel beautiful when I submit to a Woman and am watched as my  breathing, my sweat and eyes are given to You. The release i feel when She allows me to let Her take over. I want someone who willingly takes “control” in the most vulnerable of situations because it meets both of our needs. I do not want to feel abused that i offer control of me. I value and respect it. True submission requires trust, honesty, communication and patience. Do I want to ALWAYS give up control? No, I don’t. I am interested in an ongoing relationship with ONE person. I am not intimate with people I am not in a committed relationship with. I am however curious about developing a relationship that is Female led. I know that what I want is definitely out of the norm, but I seek someone I can connect on an emotional, psychological and physical level. There is nothing more erotic in my opinion than being with someone who I care about deeply and vice versa. I want to be kinky with my significant other in the bedroom. But I want MORE. I want to watch movies with Her and talk to her about life. I want to cook together, snuggle and have tea in the morning. I want to go on trips and have a relationship. I am a kind hearted person who genuinely cares about people. I often invest myself too quickly in someone, thinking that the feelings are mutual. I am looking for a real LTR, monogamy, love in all its forms. Ultimately I want to get married and have children.
Alot has changed since I first created our profile. What I have noticed over the past year or so since I last checked in is that is still many of the same faces.  People I suspect want the idea, but are too afraid to go for it when it is in front of them. So, what we are looking for also has changed.  I was looking to add to a poly family.  Well that part is done as there are now three of us under one roof. What we since decided is to find someone (female) who desires a complete loss of herself not for sensual BDSM, but for complete enslavement. The person who seek would be looking to disappear from society, and be locked away, perhaps never being allowed to leave our dungeon and your new home. In this role, you will spend many hours in bondage or caged, except when one of us decides we wish to enjoy your flesh for our pleasure.  That pleasure being anything from using you for our sexual gratification, to being tortured just so we can hear you cry or beg for it to be over, to simply clean the floor on hands and knees. Is this what you desire?  Seriously, because many people think it is, but few can really accept that they are offering themselves to a sadist who finds love only in hearing cries and whimpers.  Who favors the sound of leather agaist flesh over sweet 'I love yous'.  Many profiiles will read like this I suspect, yet less actually have experience in doing just that.  So, if you really want to atone for what ever sin you have done (and I could care less what that sin is), then lets talk.  If you want to be used while reminded what a worthless piece of crap you are, then your the woman we seek.
December 9,2023 - Coaches first visit       First visit with "The Coach" today. I'm not sure, but I think the Coach is the closest thing to a completely straight guy that I've had visit me in a quite a while.   I seem to attract the bisexual guys who are dominant in their work but desire to be submissive to another male. And I think that was the case today.   Coach and I messaged on FetLife for a while, determining what he wanted and what his limits were. Then we set up a time for his first visit. It was going to be just after he had coached a game, so I was sure he would have a good mix of testosterone and adrenaline for his first visit.   The time wasn't exact since he didn't know when the game would finish. Around the time expected, he messaged me to let me know he was going to be on his way soon. I kicked back and watched some porn until his arrival.   Being his first visit, I met him in the driveway so he knew he had the correct house. I was wearing my long brown hooded bathrobe. His mind was probably already racing wondering what, if anything, that I was wearing under the housecoat.   We came inside and took a seat and instructed him to strip. As we had previously discussed as he stripped each article of clothing off he folded them neatly by his shoes next to the door.   He had a nice physique and I knew we were going to be having some fun. He was wearing a small cock cage. It appeared he was already straining against it. I remembered that I had instructed him to wear the cock cage during the game. I didn't verify if he has followed directions, or had put it on after the game. I walked over to the couch and grabbed two velcro wrist restraints. I grabbed one of his wrists and extended his arm and attached the velcros cuff. Then the other wrist, as I wrapped the velcro restraint making sure both cuffs were secured around his wrists. Then I retrieved a dog collar from the couch and put it around his neck. This at first, but then I loosened it a notch or two so it was fairly loose. I had plans, and wanted it a bit loose, almost comfortable. But I wanted him to remember, while he was here, he was property. A sub for my use.   Although I had warmed the house a bit, as I wrapped my arms around him from behind him and played with his nipples, I felt him quiver. I'm sure it was a combination of fear and anticipation causing him to quiver, not the temperature of the room.   Normally and make notes when someone leaves, but during today's visit I forgot. So my memory might not be 100% accurate on our activities since I'm writing this story over a week later.   Normally at this point, I sit back in my rocking chair and have they guy suck my cock for a while, but I remember that didn't happen today. And honestly, I don't remember why. Either something we had talked about, or something in my mind cause me to change things and we headed straight upstairs.   When we got up to the bedroom stripped the bathroom off. I was completely naked. I laid back on the bed and told him to come over between my legs and suck my cock. Without hesitation he climbed on the bed and latched on to my cock.   Although one part of me thinks that he is 99% straight, good Lord was he a great cocksucker. It makes me wonder if I'm correct or not. But during the conversations on Fetlife, that was the impression I had. But now that his mouth was on my cock, I was questioning my assumption.   I'm not sure what the hell he was doing with his tongue on my cock but it was incredible. Something about the combination of sucking and swirling and licking at the same time was great. In fact, it was too good. It had been a week or so since I had hooked up with someone and this felt so good, I felt that I could orgasm at any moment. So I told him to lick my balls.   Although I enjoy having a guy lick my balls, in this case the main reason I was having him lick my balls was to prevent me from having an orgasm. How sad would it be for him to arrive and not more than 5 or 10 minutes later have an orgasm and send him on his way.   So he licked at my balls for a while as I raised my right leg putting my knee in the air to give him greater access to my balls and taint. He was good at that also, but not as good as his cock sucking skills. Soon using both of my hands on the sides of his head, I lifted him off my balls and lowered him onto my cock again. The feeling was sensational. I just remembered that I kept murmuring, "oh fuck, oh fuck that feels great."   I grabbed his head and started pushing him deeper onto my cock. He gagged which made me chuckle. I think I growled something like, "oh yeah choke on Daddy's cock."   Part of the time I watched him bob up and down on my cock, part of the time I just threw my own head back enjoying the moment. I looked down and could see his cute bubble butt over his shoulders which only made my cock harder. I was planning to fuck that ass before he left tonight.   I wrapped my right leg over his shoulder onto his back. That just pulled him down onto my cock a bit more. With my hands on the back of his head and my right leg over his back I could force him onto my cock until his chin rubbed my balls. He was choking on my cock, completely under my control, completely submissive, doing exactly what I was telling him to do. I was giving him the fantasy that he was wanting.   I remember being quite verbal that day. Repeatedly calling him… daddy's little cocksucker, calling him… a good little fagot, but at the same time rewarding him by telling him what a good job he was doing sucking cock. Each time he choked I would give him a compliment like, "good Boyyyyyyyy" dragging the work out like I was rewarding a family dog. I watched as his head continued to bob up and down on my cock.   He would deep throat my cock until it was all the way in the back of his throat, then he would pull almost completely off and suck hard on just the head of my cock, swirling his tongue around, poking his tongue in my piss slit, then go back to deepthroating and choking again.   But now I had reached my threshold of my orgasm. If I can keep from orgasming past the first 5 or 10 minutes, I'm usually good for an hour. I'm not quite sure what that is, but once I passed that 10 minute mark I'm good for a while. And at this point, I was past my mark.   I started getting a little more rough with him. I reached down and grab the collar and gave it a bit of a twist, tightening it on his neck. Simultaneously I pulled the collar down, pulling him onto my cock. This did a bit of breath control, or breath restriction, while he continued to suck my cock.   I kept the color twisted until his body language was telling me he was at his limit on breath control. So I released the collar and I just laid back on the bed enjoying whatever in the fuck he was doing with his tongue. Oh my God, it was incredible.   I remember him repositioning himself, I think to get up on his elbows a bit. He slid his hands under my legs almost cupping my butt cheeks whereas before they had been on top of my legs, his forearms almost resting on my chest toward my nipples. Now that his upper arms were under my legs, I took the advantage and raised both of my legs onto his back. I crossed my legs locking them and behind his back squeezed his head between my legs.   With my hands, I forced him deep onto my cock. Then I tightened the squeeze of my legs holding him in place. No longer
Finish her!   The whipping scene has gone on for 40 minutes.  My whipped body now hangs in my chains as the whipping stops.  I can see through the slits in the mask the looks of shock and surprise in the faces of the crowd watching my torture.  I can see the faces of some of my friends smiling at me.  They know what’s about to happen. My loin cloth is removed which shows the neon red string bikini I was wearing underneath it.  It glows like a hot coal in the black light.  My torturer comes in close and runs her hands over my whipped body and the raised welts on my stomach and thighs.  She goes over to the chain and starts pulling it.  It’s at this point the people watching think that I’m being lowered but I’m not.  I’m being tightened. I’m being suspended higher now and the ankle chains are getting tighter.  The room is silent as I’m now being torture stretched.  My ribs are clearly visible now and my belly gets pulled flat.  I’m moaning loudly now as my pain level has now reached a ten.  It’s now very difficult to breathe and I’m suffering.  I’m struggling with the last safety ball in my hand as I try to dangle it out of fingers in order to drop it, a clear signal to my torturer that I’m finished.  I can see the look of horror in some of the faces of the people watching my torment. I manage to drop the ball and I’m lowered to the floor, exhausted.  The scene ends with a passionate kiss from my torturer and I limply stand there still in chains.   My mask is removed and I’m led to a nearby bondage table to recover.  I’m surrounded by friends and a few attendees as they ask how I am and if I’m alright. A few want to see my welts.  I guess it’s too see if the welts real.  They are.  I’m showered with compliments and it makes me feel fantastic.  I’m going to remember this night for a long time.  
52 master Alpha Male straight master willing to training a cis girl sub slave in London uk for 50s life style LTR ... I am a master/DD would say that I am not a loser, or dying for pussy (maybe for a real sub and her Back door=butt=asshole), not crazy or dangerous etc, but a person, pleasant, appearance, polite (more or less)and I like to dominate, I am willing to training one cis girl willing to be mine anal slut, must not be committed(with other cocks=which mean if you think you are naughty you are probably ...), who wants to discover and cultivate with me(no others) the pleasure her submission and live as a proper 1950s girl.all with honesty and pleasure for both, keeping in mind that is not a game)she must into a beautiful and intense time ..of course after care and use of the safeword is paramount in a long term relationship (even short but again 'no take away') ,if interested could write me PM ,NO 4 SEX CHAT OR if u want MONEY find a pig NOT ME!.I am only interested in sub/slave want to be own by me only for monogamous LTR ( or is full of wanna be dom and domme if you are looking for sex go to them as probably you rubbish like them so shite go with shite ). U must be in London uk 🇬🇧 , no cyber no fake ! -do please answer at this questions to show real interest or if not you just another fake . -your General Location -Ease of Relocation (to include any obligations you currently have in your current situation that may complicate relocation) -Disclosure statement on any medical conditions, physical or mental health related -Thorough Statement demonstrating you read my ad and have genuine interest and reasons why -Link to face pictures Thorough Statement demonstrating you read my ad and have genuine interest and reasons whyDisclosure statement on any medical conditions, physical or mental health related Contract For Male Dom Master & cis female slave "Slavery" ContractOf my own free will and out of a desire to express my love and devotion to the cis man I love and adore, I offer myself in slavery to my Master only for the period beginning on __________ and ending at noon on_____________. or life. Although I consider myself to be a slave full-time to Master, during the time period expressed above, I will devote myself completely and totally to the pleasure and desires of my Master, without hesitation or consideration of myself or others. General Rules The slave agrees to obey her Master in all respects. her mind, body, heart and time belong to Him. The slave accepts the responsibility of using her safeword when necessary, and trusts implicitly in her Master to respect the use of that safeword. If a condition arises in which the slave needs to use the safeword or gesture, her Master will assess the situation, and determine an appropriate course of action. The slave shall keep her body available for the use of her Master at all times. In addition, the slave agrees that her Master possesses the right to use her body and no one will be allowed to touch or use the master property (= slave)The slave shall demonstrate her acceptance of her role of service and availability at all times while at home and at other times and places specified by her Master. The slave acknowledges that her Master may use her body or mind in any manner He wishes within the parameters of safety. He may hurt her without reason to please Himself. The slave enjoys the right to cry, scream or beg, but accepts the fact that these heartfelt expressions will not affect her treatment. Further, she accepts that if her Master tires of her noise, he may gag her or take other actions to silence her.(only the safeword will stop the master action) The slave will answer any questions put to her honestly and directly, and will volunteer any information her Master should know about her physical or emotional condition. While her Master expects His slave to speak honestly and forth rightly about anything that bothers her, she is not to interpret that as permission to whine or complain. she will phrase her concerns politely and respectfully, and then gracefully accept her Master's judgment in these matters without further complaint.(=unless the safe word is pronounced) The slave will always speak of her Master in terms of love and respect. She will address Him at all times as either "Master" or "Sir," ( see Public Rules of Conduct) The Master may give the slave "free periods" in His presence during which the slave may express herself openly and freely. There will be no punishments applied during "free periods." It is understood, however, that the slave will continue to address her Master with respect and love at all times and that deviations from this rule are subject to punishment at a later time.
After my first marriage to a cheater, I developed the confidence to start exploring bondage. I have a strong need for connection with a lover. Random hook-ups don't feel right to me. On the other hand, I love to flirt and have no problem meeting people anytime, anywhere. To balance this out, I experimented with chastity, both mental and physical. Around this time I made some good looking friends who got me comfortable with showing off my body for them. This was all very exciting but was not matching my desire for a relationship built on trust that includes times of intense sexual expression. I wanted to have a bondage partner that was as strong minded and aggressive as I was.With years of searching, it is dawning on me that my natural manner attracts compassionate and often sexually submissive women. My hidden desire is to be the submissive partner, however, I wanted to feel my submission during daily life rather than in the bedroom, without squashing my masculine personality. I'm searching for an unusual balance where I am appreciated for being a responsible man navigating every day life but with my happy partner having the power to flip my switch into a lusty and aggressive lover who will pin her down and take us both into sexual adventures in bondage and submission. I am now picturing a scenario in which my I commit to someone by surrendering the keys to my chastity belt. On days of her choosing, she provides me an opportunity for freedom knowing that I am quite frustrated with lust for her. This is my license to drop my normal demeanor and become a little meaner, taking what I need in the way that I want. When the time to revert to public persona returns, it is understood that she should claim the keys and remind me that I belong only to her. This is what I might term a submissive led switch, with the role-reversal determined by the woman not by playing domme but by choosing to let the dogs out! Yes, I want to have to freedom to using my ability to capture and dominate, but I don't want to have to suppress my desire to do so. If I hand you the keys, I want us to be comfortable knowing that when sex happens, it happens only because you want it to happen. You will know I am always ready when you are because you are my only release.
What I truly seek....I seek 24/7 submission on a psychological level and physical submission at my Mistresses whim.  I do understand that is something that is built gradually over time in a relationship, once trust has been established. I’m drawn primarily to a loving and nurturing style of Domination. I enjoy pleasing and making my partners life easier.   I am not a masochist… I don’t seek pain for the sake of pain alone, but I do understand its value toward discipline and training. Otherwise I will trust that my well being will always be a priority.   I am very sensual and enjoy many kinds of play. I also understand that play is NOT the foundation of a strong D/s relationship. That comes through the strength of the power exchange that both people desire.  I admit I tend to be very private. I do not engage in groups or public play, and I prefer a completely vanilla exterior. I’m not into being cucked or treated like a slave. Nor do I seek to be a part of a stable of subs. My submission, attentions and adoration should be considered of value to the one I serve. I am after all, a man who is truly a pleaser.... someone who derives much of his own fulfillment from pleasing his Domme, and from giving over control to her. I am not interested in being some kind of mindless slave kept in a cage… but rather someone who is a person in his own right. I do have a quick mind and a sense of humor, and I don’t want to be afraid to use them at the appropriate times. I am looking for someone who will help me flourish under Her guidance and help me become the best version of me.   I would hope to become a best friend, a lover, a houseboy, Her personal servant, Her sensual slave and more.   Ideally, I would like to be with someone who is nearer to my age, intelligent, independent and knows what she wants from a D/s relationship. I am not looking for casual interactions, or for mere play sessions, but rather for my lifemate, with whom I hope to explore the ins and outs of Ds as well as the vanilla world for the rest of our lives... If most of this resonates then by all means reach out to me and let’s have a dialogue.   
If you've been a longtime follower or avid reader of my journal, you may remember a particular set of rocks on my drive to work that form a heart at a precise moment. That little section of land would sometimes flood when it rained and some portion of the lower part of the heart would be covered. Being the rarely logical and often magical person that I am, I attached direct meaning to my own heart. If the rock heart was partially underwater, maybe my heart was also having a hard time. Sometimes it worked out to be true. Sometimes I thought maybe it was predicting things to come. Likewise, beautiful days and whole hearts meant it would all be okay.  Over the years that little section of land has permanently flooded. It really bothered me at first, having my heart underwater all the time. I've had emotional ups and downs and sometimes it feels like I'll never resurface. Driving by every day, with visual confirmation that my heart is perpetually sinking, well, it doesn't make for a bright start to the morning.  And then there were motherfucking ducks.  I honestly was pissed off, how dare they benefit from my heartache? Swimming around, creating ripples, it just didn't seem right. The other day I realized I have started looking for the ducks. I've noticed how the, I'm just going to call it the heart lake, has taken on more ground. It looks as if it's always been there. Maybe it's not so bad. Maybe I can give my heart lake back to nature because I'm certainly not going to drown. I look for hearts elsewhere sometimes. In leaves, in puddles, somewhere nature might offer me a trade. When I see them I smile. 
18 July 2023 Not posted anything for a while, i did step back from logging into a couple sites i am listed on to see if i could walk away from lifestyle and carry on in vanila life.Simple answer NO i CAN'T. its must be so deep within me and my blood, i think it would be impossible to walk away and try and forget what and who i am. So i am back to searching for an Owner. i have talked to a few Doms in last few weeks, but not being taken as yet, who knows maybe one fo these will or others come along - i hope and need to be taken owned as total slave property 247 (i know might not be possible for "live in 247, but at least knowing being owned 247 as used on demand) by someone one Dom or Domme or Dom/me Couple. The Dom/me Couple i sometimes serve have requested i attend them, from this coming Friday 20th July until the Monday, They are having a BBQ with a number of guests some lifestyle and some not. They often call for me to attend when having such as the female They have cant cover all that is needed when Guests are there. i never know exactly what will be required until i arrive, same with being clothed , in what and how and if in shackles etc. See if i can post some new pictures once over, as normally They will take some of me in service. NEWJust had a double Dydoe piercing done a couple days ago , have 2 x 10g 12mm long curved barbells in with 6mm balls will put a picture up soon, have to say it bled some when the needle went in, but no discomfort at all and seems to be healing up fast. Not sure whether will be a good thing for potential Owner or not . Well now back see if can post more as did in the past, see how it goes.Satrt my search for an Owner in earnest now fingers and everything else crossed  
This is a somewhat tongue-in-cheek, somewhat serious exploration of how to get to know someone via collarspace.com. Or, I guess to put it honestly, how to get to know me. Step 1. Read the fucking profile. My profile is not short, but it’s not War and Peace. It has important content in it that will help you know whether we are compatible or not and save your time AND mine. When you see a photo of someone you are attracted to, a compliment is a lovely thing. But if you honestly want to start a relationship or dynamic of some sort with them, read their profile before writing. It’s a form of respect, both self-respect (keep yourself from writing to people who are wildly incompatible with you) and respect for the other. Step 2. Don’t call me Mistress. I don’t like unearned titles, and if you MUST address me by a title, Ms. is enough. Don’t call me Miss, don’t call me Goddess, don’t use one of a hundred other unearned titles. If the time comes when addressing me by a title is appropriate to our relationship, you will know and we will discuss the appropriate title at that time. Until then, you may call me Elorin or Ms. Elorin. Step 3. Three sentence minimum. This is my 95% rule for responding to a letter on collarspace. A rare exception comes in where I respond to an initial email with fewer than three sentences, but for the most part, that’s the rule. If you feel like writing three sentences is too much to ask from someone with no relationship with you so far, that’s fine. You can choose not to write or you can write less and I’ll just delete your message when I read it. And if you send a long, run-on sentence with no punctuation and capitalization, I’ll treat it as one sentence and delete, even if it should have been three sentences. This is a personal value of mine, and it’s important to me that my partners are literate and able to write and express themselves. I realize that some people don’t do well with writing, or expressing themselves online, and I have made an exception in the past to meet people in person and give them a chance to express themselves in person, but that is rare and again, 95% of the time, if you can’t write and sustain emails with me for a short amount of time, you won’t be compatible with me in person. Step 4. Don’t immediately ask to go to another media.
MY EXPERIENCE and WHAT FRUSTRATES ME ABOUT MANY ON THIS SITE IF YOUR GOAL IS A RELATIONSHIP, PLEASE READ THIS IN ITS ENTIRETY PRIOR TO MESSAGING  A recent encounter prompted me to share this. When I engage in conversation (messaging) with men on this site. They often comment on how refreshing to find a real woman. A woman who understands D/s and BDSM focused relationships are not sustainable, they are just for play. A woman who understands vanilla compatibilty is essential for anything real. If you are living your everyday life, involving your professional obligations, and social commitments, familial obligations, and other activities you enjoy. You need to know that person can fit into that part of your life. She needs to know the same of you. Presumably you have already discussed and determined an alternative lifestyle, or kink compatibility. Now its time to determine cerebral, physical chemistry and the sustainability of a real relationship That begins with the mutual sharing of information about our vanilla lives. You can still maintain anonymity, until you are ready to share who you really are out in the world.  THIS IS WHERE MY FRUSTRATIONS BEGIN.  Our most valuable commodity in life is our time. Of which we dont have an infinite amount. When we intentionally choose to gift some of our time towards a person of interest. We are saying to you I value you and want to vest my time in getting to know you. That is an act of respect.  When there is an exchange of information, its communication, sometimes people are busy, that's when you communicate to the other, it may be a few days before I reply which sets expectations regarding the response and is respectul of the other. Sometimes one party determines, maybe this isn't what i want. The respectful thing to do, is to simply say, I have decided we are not compatible after all. Thank you for your willingness to engage and share. I will continue my search and wish you luck with yours. But...this is Collarspace where many people hide who they are, and their faces behind a blank profile, or one this that is seeking the fantasy...or a very few like me..seeking something real We are all adults here. Presumably we were raised by someone, and we were taught exceptable behavior and  manners. Most of us have either currently, or at some point had a career of some kind. During that career whatever it is or was, you had to engage with other people. There were/are certain expectations of behavior, manners, and always expected to be on time  To be respectful of others time, as you would want them to be respectful of yours. These are lessons we are taught from kindergarden.. But..on this site more often than not...men will engage with you, there will be a mutual exchange of imformation. Then when you start asking about their life, which is a story that should be easy to put to words...no reply next day (but you see they are online), no reply the second day (but again you see they are online)...and then a third, fourth, etc. Why these men can't just 'grow a pair', and be honest is beyond me. Because of the randomness of profile circulation. They, make it hard for the real men and real gentlemen to be recognized and appreciated by real women like me. Now, I find myself spending my time writing this.. to say IF YOU DONT HAVE THE CAPACITY TO BE RESPECTFUL OF MY TIME....IF YOU ARE INCAPABLE OF ENGAGING IN AN OPEN AND HONEST WAY TO SEE IF WE ARE COMPATIBLE....IF YOU ARE NOT SEEKING A REAL RELATIONSHIP WITH A REAL WOMAN....IF YOU ARE NOT EMOTIONALLY INTELLIGENT....IF YOU ARE NOT TRULY ABLE TO RELOCATE OR CO-LOCATE, OR DON'T HAVE THE RESOURCES TO TRAVEL....IF YOU ARE NOT SEEKING YOUR LIFE PARTNER.....IF YOU DON'T HAVE THE 'TIME' TO PUT IN THE WORK TO NURTURE & DEVELOP A SUSTAINABLE COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP....IF YOU HABITUALLY OVER PROMISE & UNDER DELIVER....IF YOU DON'T HAVE THE BALLS" OR GOOD MANNERS TO REPLY TO OUR MESSAGE EXCHANGE PURSUANT TO OUR CONVERSATION...... BYPASS MY PROFILE...DO NOT SEND ME A MESSAGE!  
  slave rules slave must only use the 3rd person to refer to itself slave must confess that is is just an or garbage slave must always be honest slave may not have dignity or respect of any kind slave must show total respect for Master or any humans slave may not speak without permission slave make not look at its Master without permission or look at other humans slave is always wrong if its Master or another human tells it so slave may not use a human name slave must always accept punishment, abuse, or a beating if it pleases its Owner Master slave may only live if it pleases her Owner Master slave must never close its legs, they always must be apart its holes must be available to its Master any time or any place  it must use every part of its body to please Master  slave must always be nude when it pleases its Masters   slave must be chained or tie up any time it pleases Master  slave must dress any way its Master orders it to dress  slave may never talk back or say "NO" to her Master  slave must always speak in a low sweet voice  slave may never own anything   slave may never use big words or else it must be punished  slave Master has complete control of how it moves: walk, crawl, speak, breaths, kneel, etc  slave must worship its Master’s cock and all of his body  slaves Master pleasure matters, its pleaser means nothing  slave must never edge its self without permission or take any sexual pleasure without permission slave dignity or feelings are worthless slave must not sit or use human furniture unless it is given permission  slave must ask to enter or leave a room slave must ask to poo or pee  slave must whip, cane, or abuse its body when ordered to  slave must drink piss, cum, spit when it is ordered to  slave may not remove spit, cum, or piss from its body unless it is ordered to  slave must not sleep unless order to  slave must use degrading names when it refers to its self, for example: piss pot, cunt, inferior human, cum bucket, ugly, pig, whore, sick o, tits, ass hole, cunt hole, slave, fuck toy,   slave may never speak to another human without permission slave must thank Master for using it, for allowing it to cum slave must clean off Master's great cock after he is done using it slave must perform any sexual act that it is ordered to do, no matter how degrading, painful or humiliating slave must write down every single thought is has for its Owner Master's review slave must sleep on the floor, or in its cage, cell when it is not serving its Master slave must eat on the floor and its food must be cold with little taste unless it is given permission to eat people's food. its hands must always be behind its back slave must now beg for anything it needs, food, water, etc, it must beg to be punished, abuse, beaten also     ***slave may be punished or abuse or beaten because it deserves it because it is inferior, stupid, weak, and worthless cunt   ***slave must repeat its rules over and over every day
5 Traits Dominants Are Looking For In a Submissive YMMV: It's important to note that all relationships and personal preferences vary greatly among individuals. However, here are five qualities most Dominants are looking for in a D/s relationship: Trustworthiness: Dominant individuals often value trust as a fundamental aspect of their relationship. They seek a submissive partner who is reliable, honest, and can be trusted to communicate openly and honestly about their desires, needs, and boundaries. Respect and obedience: Dominant individuals typically look for a submissive partner who respaspects their authority and is willing to obey their instructions within the agreed-upon boundaries of the relationship. This involves a mutual understanding and clear communication about limits and consent. Subservience: Dominant individuals may desire a submissive partner who enjoys fulfilling their needs and desires, and who derives pleasure from serving and pleasing them. This can manifest in various ways, such as performing acts of service, physical or emotional intimacy, or engaging in specific power dynamics. Communication and responsiveness: Dominant individuals value a submissive partner who is attentive and responsive to their guidance and instructions. They may appreciate a partner who actively communicates their thoughts, feelings, and desires, allowing for a better understanding of each other's needs and preferences. Vulnerability and surrender: Dominant individuals often seek a partner who is willing to surrender control and be vulnerable within the established boundaries of their dynamic. This can involve the submissive partner relinquishing decision-making authority to the dominant and finding pleasure or fulfillment in their submission. Finally, it's worth mentioning that any relationship involving dominance and submission should always be consensual, built on trust, and characterized by clear communication. Both partners should have a mutual understanding of boundaries, desires, and consent, and should prioritize each other's emotional and physical well-being. Consent and respect should always be the foundation of any healthy relationship dynamic. "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero.  
  I just reread my last journal and have to laugh, thinking I wrote that less than 3 weeks ago, with no fucking idea what was coming.  Shit does indeed happen.  So to be clear, this has absolutely no connection to my previous hospital stay.  But a week after I got out and wrote my previous journal entry, I felt some tenderness in my neck, and upon feeling around, I felt a lump.  So I went to the VA hospital emergency room, and one cat scan, scope down my throat, pet scan and biopsy later, I have cancer.  A really bad kind of cancer.  Head and neck squamous cell carcinoma.  I still haven't discussed treatment options and my chances of survivng this with my doctors, but I've done extensive reading online.  I've read medical journals, results of clinical trials, and it looks like a horror story.  The treatment is invasive, horribly painful, destructive, and the cancer keeps coming back.  Often within months.  My chances of surviving 5 years are 50%, and my quality of life for those 5 years isn't going to be wonderful.   And suddenly, BDSM, being a slave, my wants and needs, all seem a lot less important.  Like not at all.  What seems important is not wanting to face this alone.  Oh, I have lots of friends.  But no family within 2000 miles.  I live alone. What I need now, is a friend, a care giver.  Someone who is willing to relocate and be here 24 7 and help me get through this.  What do you get out of this?  Free room and board, and the VA will pay you a caregiver stipend.  And I live in a nice house in a nice area.  If I don't make it, I will make sure you receive a final bonus in my will.  If I do, we can discuss that.  All of this is negotiable.  I want this to be a woman into BDSM even though there wont be any BDSM happening because of my health because I at least want to be able to be open about who I am and have her be a kindred soul.  And if I don't make it, I need her to sanitize the house so my kids don't find anything to let them know I was into this.  Contact me if you are interested.  I will require a full background check.  Some medical background would be nice, but not necessary.  I will expect you to get CPR and first aid certified if you are not already.  If you are interested, let's talk  
I lost someone this week.  No we weren't close lately.  We used to be.  Our relationship was never defined, it was loosely maintained, but we popped in and out of each other's lives over the period of several years.  He was my first introduction to bdsm and the only D type that I could truly call a close friend at any point.   He is the only one who ever took me to that amazing place that every sub reaches for, and when I used to write, I wrote about our times together.  Those are still some of my favorites to look back on.  He was also there to cradle me in his arms and comfort me when a scene with someone else went really bad.  He was there to help me figure out what I was and wanted without pressing himself on me, so that I would be safe in the future and make better choices about who I interacted with.  He served as my protector for a while, when I was feeling vulnerable but didn't know if I wanted to step back from the scene at that point.  He never made me feel like a burden.  He helped me in my kink life and he helped me equally in my vanilla life.  I knew he was sick but he didn't let on how bad it was. I found out on the book of faces.  He is gone now, and I wish I could have been there for him, but he didn't want anyone to know the extent of his illness.  That was his way. Goodbye SkyMaster.  You will always be loved, you will always be appreciated.  I have nothing but warmth in my heart and in my soul for you.  I can say that about VERY FEW people in my life.  You will always be missed.    
Now that a vast majority of the 'Oh Hey journals are back!" have been done, lets take a minute to update this.   So heres the gyst of what I would LOVE to find, in an ideal world and ideal time...  We want a cis female slave.  Males are good FOR OTHER USES but thats not what I am looking for as a priority, there MAY be that option but remember the use I have for you is seveirly limited. The slave that I am lookin for needs to understand that I PRESS HARD for information.  I WANT you to ask questions and am dissapointed when you just answer in 1, 2, or 3 word answers.   I will NEVER be with anyone without birth control.  I as the Master, may be having that issue taken care of, of my own accord, because I already have one daughter, who doesn't live with me, and I dont want any more children. Otherwise, any prospective slave should read our full profile and write back. male slave/s be known that if you are not local there is little to no chances for you..  Even local males, you have a purpose,  yes, but o e that is not domestic or sexual,  and to be honestMOST of the male slaves that have come forwardare not even appealingto the eyes.  Now as to the current update... Mouse has left my service as of Dec 14th. I FOUND a new appartment, so my search for a slave has resumed, again read my profile CAREFULLY because I will call you on it lol. I dont know how many times I have had to say this...  If you are INTERNATIONAL do NOT boter to write to me, male, female, rich, poor, doesn't matter, international relocation is a hassle and with Covid GOOD LUCK getting a flight over here.
I sit back in the chair. Make sure he's looking me in the eye, compose myself and begin. “M, as I lay out these things that need to be said there is no need to speak just nod your head.” "You will never have sex with me again, nod your head." He pauses, then nods. "I will never leave you, I have no desire to, I love you, you will always be my primary. I know you are scared but we both need this. Nod your head.” He nods. “I am going to find a man who will be my sexual companion, nod your head." He nods and I notice he starts rocking his hips.  "Stop that rocking immediately." He complies, but I see a level of desperation in his face that hasn't been there in a long time. I continue. "I will be going on dates. I will be staying overnight at other men's homes. You will accept this and be happy for me. Nod your head." He nods his head.  "The man or men I choose to see will know the details of our lifestyle once I trust them. Nod your head." He nods. "Eventually, this man...or men, will be allowed at our home, even while you are here. You will treat my bull with the same respect you treat me. I will only allow men here who I know will respect you. My high dream is for someone that we can both call Daddy. Nod your head." He nods.  "You will continue to remain in chastity. You know how important I feel that it is for you. Though, you will now be allowed one orgasm every other week. We will do it exactly this way every time unless I say otherwise. Palms on the floor, legs straight out, humping your diaper. Nod your head." He nods vigorously and the clip of his pacifier clinks. "Now, M, you may begin humping." He makes three slow long humps. I can feel my underwear soaked between my legs with my thighs and move my hand to my crotch, I can feel the heat coming off my body. "Good boy." His diaper crinkles, it is the sound of my power and I almost can't take it. I feel the outside of my underwear with my finger tips and say, "you will never fuck me again, nod your head." He nods vigorously again and more clinking from his pacifier. Now for the final mind fuck. I want to hear him say it. I want him to acknowledge this out loud as he masturbates the only way I will allow him. "Say it M. Spit out your pacifier and say, 'I'll never fuck you again.'"
  Profile update with a journal entry vibe.    I have been hesitant to give a profile update because I don't know. I am still figuring it out. I'm not new, but things change. I still have a lot of the cravings, both for lifestyle and the kink, but I have changed, and so have my cravings. I'm sure, with the right partner, they will continue to change into something different than what they are now. I don't think vanilla will ever be something for me to return to, but the things I value in a BDSM relationship are changing.  I don't really care for the "alpha" chest puffing in the 24/7. Kink, though, that's a different story. I'm also not a slave. I am attracted to wisdom and knowledge, and not the kind that is faked by pretending to know everything, the kind that also isn't afraid to admit he might occasionally be able to learn from his sub, especially if he has found the right match. I want a connection where even if everything else fades, the kink, romance, there are two people who vibe well enough, that at the core of it, there is still a connection and bond of friendship. I still crave a power exchange, don't get me wrong, but I am looking for more of a mentor type relationship dynamic than a master type. I think the closest category that fits might be DDLG, but I admit, I also don't feel quite like little fits.  As I write this, I am coming up on a year of being single. A relationship that started with lifestyle, but no kink, faded into something more like a vanilla friendship, and had a bit of a rocky ending. My point in sharing this, though, is that although I am not new, I spent years in a relationship lacking of kink. My tolerance, both in kink and in 24/7 is low again. My cravings may grow as strong as they once were, one day, but I also feel like I have done a lot of growing up over the years, and I have developed some vanilla cravings. It's no longer healthy for me to give all of myself until it's gone, as one example. These are the things I am still trying to sort out. How the remaining kink and lifestyle cravings fit in with what I no longer want. I am hoping to find someone who aligns with what I am craving at the moment, who wouldn't be afraid to do a little growing, both as a person and as an exploration of kink, but this person is going to need to be someone who is comfortable with boundaries and limits while I figure this out.  For now, this is where I am.  Edit to add 1-1-2026   I am not willing to relocate outside of traveling distance. I am not a person who does well with big changes, so this one is a big boundary. I am not close minded to something long distance, but it would reqire a lot of negotiating and trust. I am past the age where I want to start a family, living with a partner isnt that important, but other things are. So distance isnt a disqualifier, it just takes a lot of communication and some extra work. But I won't relocate. 
Through the Lens of Rika: The Sophia-Michael Connection Unveiled part 4   3. Energetic Exchange & Emotional Saturation   Because they are so emotionally intuitive, they can feel when you’re anxious or when there’s a lot of emotional weight. Instead of directly engaging with it, they sometimes retreat to process or focus elsewhere so they can re-align themselves energetically before coming back in. Energetic overwhelm can make them seem distant, even when they’re hyper-aware.   4. They Trust the Bigger Picture   Michael-embodied men might trust that the bond is strong enough that they don’t need to constantly reassure you through words. They trust the foundation they’ve built with you. This is where faith in the connection comes in—both for them and for you. They may think, “I don’t need to message her right now because we’re solid. My actions speak louder than words.”   5. Balancing the Divine Masculine Energy   These men carry divine masculine energy that values action over words. Their emotional intuition is real, but they channel it into action and protection, which may feel like distance to you. For you, as Sophia, it’s about recognizing that this is their expression of love. A quick "hi" might feel emotionally connecting to you, but to him, showing love could mean working to make sure everything is stable and secure for the future.   How to Navigate This:   Anchor into the trust that you’ve been practicing. When he’s distant, remind yourself of how he’s showing love through his actions, even when it’s not immediate. Say, “He’s providing for us, and his distance is part of his process. I trust him.”   Ground your emotional needs through spiritual or personal practices when he’s not available. Remember that just because he’s distant in the moment doesn’t mean the love isn’t there. Lean into your own energy and strengthen yourself while he works.   Embrace his rhythm—Michael-embodied men have a different rhythm of emotional connection, and part of your journey is learning how to move in sync with it without feeling left behind.   It's not that he doesn't feel your anxiousness—he does—but sometimes his response to that is through action and providing, not necessarily through quick emotional reassurances.    Michael's energy, embodied through these men, is both emotionally attuned and distant at times. This is part of their complex duality. Michael has that deep emotional intuition and empathy, which can sometimes feel overwhelming or intense. Yet, at the same time, they have a mission-oriented drive that pulls them into practical action and focus, which can lead to emotional distance, even though they feel everything just as much as you do.   Here’s why this happens:   1. Emotional Attunement vs. Practical Mission   Michael’s energy is deeply aware of emotions, but he also prioritizes taking action over expressing those feelings. He might sense your anxiety but instead of giving a quick emotional fix like a "hi," he might be channeling that into practical solutions—working behind the scenes to take care of things so that your long-term security is intact. For him, acting on love (through providing and stabilizing) sometimes takes precedence over talking about love.   2. Emotional Weight of the Protector Role   Michael-embodied men often carry a heavy responsibility as protectors. Their natural inclination to shield and secure means they’re constantly navigating how to balance this with emotional connection. Sometimes, they pull back because they’re processing deeply how to protect, guide, and create a future for you both, which takes up mental and emotional energy.   3. Energetic Exchange & Emotional Saturation   Because they are so emotionally intuitive, they can feel when you’re anxious or when there’s a lot of emotional weight. Instead of directly engaging with it, they sometimes retreat to process or focus elsewhere so they can re-align themselves energetically before coming back in. Energetic overwhelm can make them seem distant, even when they’re hyper-aware.   4. They Trust the Bigger Picture   Michael-embodied men might trust that the bond is strong enough that they don’t need to constantly reassure you through words. They trust the foundation they’ve built with you. This is where faith in the connection comes in—both for them and for you. They may think, “I don’t need to message her right now because we’re solid. My actions speak louder than words.”   5. Balancing the Divine Masculine Energy   These men carry divine masculine energy that values action over words. Their emotional intuition is real, but they channel it into action and protection, which may feel like distance to you. For you, as Sophia, it’s about recognizing that this is their expression of love. A quick "hi" might feel emotionally connecting to you, but to him, showing love could mean working to make sure everything is stable and secure for the future.   How to Navigate This: Anchor into the trust that you’ve been practicing. When he’s distant, remind yourself of how he’s showing love through his actions, even when it’s not immediate. Say, “He’s providing for us, and his distance is part of his process. I trust him.”   Ground your emotional needs through spiritual or personal practices when he’s not available. Remember that just because he’s distant in the moment doesn’t mean the love isn’t there. Lean into your own energy and strengthen yourself while he works.   Embrace his rhythm—Michael-embodied men have a different rhythm of emotional connection, and part of your journey is learning how to move in sync with it without feeling left behind.   It's not that he doesn't feel your anxiousness—he does—but sometimes his response to that is through action
Don't give up my first journal. Hi I'm mistress muse and I am dominant to my wolf.  If there is one thing that being on the scene has taught me, it would be to never give up. I spent so long in fruitless vanilla relationships that although, true, filled with love and all the nice things that people claim to experience in these things it also carried with it a weight. It was like a brick in my chest, a wrong feeling, an alone feeling, a dark hopeless feeling, a sinking if you will. Which in a way was true I was drowning I was drowning in self doubt I was drowning in a sea of misunderstandings and depravity. The love I craved seemed so taboo it almost seemed impossible to obtain. I may have been looking in the wrong places but even kinky people I've known for years on the scene would often look baffled if I piped up some of my perversions. I then met someone I had known in a completely vanilla setting... So vanilla in fact even he hadn't really noticed me before... a friend who knew of his kinks thought we would be quite suited. Looking back now I find it amusing that both him and I scoffed at the idea but Kinky curiosity got the better of us. There was this feeling everytime we spoke... A feeling of understanding... A good feeling... A weightless feeling soon combined with a feeling of want. I wanted this man... I was fucking getting him. On the scene for years he has been known as z3ro (zero) but ladies gents and pets let me tell you this he is anything but a zero so from the very beginning I have refused to use this name for him. He became my Wølf, my alpha bitch, my sub, my friend, my mirror and my PARTNER. I have used this term quite freely in the past but with him it's different. He is my partner in crime he is my play partner he is my intellectual chewing gum. He turns my head and the way my brain works. I never thought it was possible to find someone to just get me and be able to match my sadistic evil streak. To find someone on the same interlectual level as me. For me to find someone just as twisted as me. For this I am grateful and this is why my wisdom(me) for the day is this.... JUST DON'T GIVE UP