One of the advantages of being older is that you learn what is realistic for a lifestyle and what isn't - what exists only in the realm of fantasy. The various profiles you read of '...wanting to be locked in a dungeon 24/7...' just aren't realistic.But… when you make someone whom (or what) they have always dreamed of being, it’s an emotional experience for both of you, almost intoxicating. So how can you make this work? In my arena of the lifestyle - transforming someone into a rubber or rubber doll 24/7 isn't realistic. You can however try and set up your lifestyle so that the experience feels like 24/7. The following works for a latex lifestyle: I would come home from work and go into a spare room and change into rubber. My slave would already be waiting for me in another room, hooded. The first time I saw her after work she would be hooded. The first time she saw me after I got home, I too would also be hooded.The next day, before I left for work, I would change into work clothes without her seeing me. That way, we went several days without seeing each others faces, only hooded. For two people who found being around other humans awkward, this truly was a moment of emotional freedom. I have tried this and it worked (wonderfully!), up to a point. But that topic - when things didn’t work out perfectly - is the subject for another post.

A long term 24/7 master-slave relationship is not to be taken lightly. Some people have a '16/7' relationship: they both go to work then adopt their MS roles when they get home from work. This gets round some of the difficulties of the true 24/7 relationship, namely: 1. The Master better be financially solvent! (if he isn't responsible enough to have a balanced budget, then imho he isn't responsible enough to be a master). Conversely, the slave needs to be prepared to put her career on hold. 2. Even if the slave is service oriented, the 8 hours a day while her Master is at work can drag. Once the euphoria of the first few months wears off, this is a real challenge and can threaten the whole relationship dynamic. This is especially a problem if the slave has relocated to a country where she cannot get a work visa. A smart master will anticipate this and use the 'honeymoon period' at the start of the relationship to get a solid routine in place. Or to accept that the true 24/7 just isn't working and changes need to be made. Everyone is different. Telling a slave that this is her allocated 'vanilla time' to go to a cafe etc. and that you want her to do this works well for some MS dynamics. Another is a vanilla travel budget - she has permission to explore for three days whilst you are at work - but of course she has to earn that time off... Every relationship is different: there are some slaves who would shiver in horror at spending a night away from their master, for others it gives a necessary reflection on how much their master means to them. Given the intensity of MS relationships, this discussion on setting expectations is every bit as important as that on limits. It needs to be equally well respected by the master. Thank you for reading.

Formatting on Collarspace... Sigh. Apologies to anyone who has received an email from me with no line breaks in it. This seems to be a current 'feature' of the site which removes them from my emails, sigh. If anyone has a workaround, please let me know. LT

A BDSM relationship is the exact opposite of casual sex, sadly there are a lot of (male) idiots out there who just don't get that. There is truly a need for a deep connection. It is about giving yourself to the other and fulfilling each other's desires, dreams and needs. Orgasm, when it happened would be the climax of 5 hours' build-up, not 5 minutes. I've learnt from experience that certain types of slaves require different types of masters (and vice versa). Someone who lives for pain needs a master/owner who likes using a whip, someone who wants to be transformed or objectified needs an owner who craves bondage and masks. There is sometimes overlap, but you need to find a master who meets your prime needs – and that way, you will meet his. The reason I am writing this is that I am not someone who likes giving pain. I love to tie people up, tease them, take hours to prepare them for orgasm – controlling them so that they (eventually!) scream with pleasure is a huge turn on for me. I love the act of transformation, putting a mask on them so that they are transformed from their 'day job' and everyday self into my slave is an immense feeling and a huge release for both of us. For a slave who craves nothing except to be her master's object, when she is transformed, nothing else matters: a horrible boss, a stressful day at work, paying the mortgage, it all goes away as we are totally immersed as one. This I can deliver (and deliver it well). But what I cannot do is deliberately hurt someone, it messes with my emotions too much. If that is what you crave or if you need to be shouted at, then I am not the master for you.

The art of dressing a sub in latex is my all-time turn on, seeing the 'finished product' evolve step by step. The mask, the final transformation, is the creme de la creme. Putting the mask on, tightening it and zipping it is immensely emotional. And then when she turns round and she is transformed into MY rubber object, that is the most amazing feeling in the whole world. The sex is almost an afterthought (although it's nice), it is transforming someone that drives me. If you crave loving objectification and transformation (but not humiliation) drop me a mail and we'll see if we get on. LT