I thought I found the one. Turned out not to be. In a way it hurts more than when my Master died because he didn't choose to leave. This one chose to. And I can't understand. I had come to a point where the hurt wasn't so bad. I was used to being alone and after some time, it becomes your new normal. I didn't need anyone and didn't care. Then you do care because he was perfect and made me  happy. Then it ends. Now I have to reach the point of numbness and not caring anymore and thats hard. But it's a lesson learned. 

I think time did tell and it didn't take long. Worse part is I don't know if it because I couldn't believe or if it was really just not true . In any case it sucks. It felt magical for a time. 

My Master passed away in 2021. It's been a long hard road since then. But things have been a little brighter recently because of a certain someone. Is it too good to be true? Maybe but time will tell. 

As I adjust to my new life i have found a peace I have never known. I am still finding my way in this journey. I'm so happy to be living with my master full time. He is amazing. But today was a difficult day for me. I know I have so much to learn and my master is training me well. All I want is to please him but I continue to fail often. Not intentionally but my lack of attention to details has been my downfall thus far. I feel like I disappoint him and that is more painful than the punishment. I think maybe ill never be as good a slave as he deserves.

"He has changed my life" is so inadequate to express what he has done. He is my master, the very center of my world. Until recently, I couldn't have told you anything about the master and slave dynamic. I may have even argued such people even really existed. Also at the same time my life was chaotic and i struggled through most days. Anxiety and indecision made most days miserable.
Then I found him or he found me. Which ever the case may be, I have found peace. He rules my world and with just a word he can still my body and mind. With a simple touch he can set my body on fire. No more are my days filled with worry or indecision, because he keeps it simple. He says and I do, very simple. And in this I find more comfort and peace than I had ever imagined could be possible.