I love creative people, you guys turn me on

Its been a long and painful road for me, finally pasted the 4 yr anniversary of the start of hell for me, but finally I do feel there is hope!  Thanksgiving night, I blew up and really had a violent melt down!  I know it was coming after a series of things triggered built up anger thats been in my system for years and years!   I think after all is said and done, when all the dust settles, the intial meltdown that night might be the one thing that will save me!  It really got me thinking and gave me time to reflect and just try and figure out how to fix everything.  Even though it wasnt an instant cure, since I've been doing better, still suffering from post tramic stress via sandy related, but otherwise im gunna get better and back to my old self!  Im fighthing as hard as hell to do it! 

I feel like the ultimate screw up in life!

This hurricane really changed my thinking, that really was an amazing storm  

Hurricane sandy is expected to bear down on us as early as tonight thru wedsenday, this is a violent powerrful strom and I live on the shore and will go thru the ne quadrent of this thing, hence if u send me a message, please be patient if i dont get back to u right away!  Thanks