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*If you wish to communicate with me, COMMUNICATE with me - and this does mean sending me a mindfully composed message.*
This profile is most certainly a test.
How you approach will illustrate whether or not you have read it and if you can take clear and deliberate direction.
Should you fail to approach as CLEARLY directed, what you are displaying to me is either an unwillingness or inability to take direction from the very start.
If your profile or your approach illustrates that you are not what I clearly state here that I seek, I will not reply.
You only get one chance at a first impression. Use it wisely. There are no shortcuts.
*I do not entertain approaches from dominants or switches. Confused people are confusing. I know myself without question as a dominant. The man I want knows himself as a submissive wishing to be owned as a slave without question. Clarity matters. *
I created this profile aside from another I have posted as I do not wish for my "public" face to attract delusional men seeking nothing more than their own fantasy fulfillment.
To be clear, I am seeking a long-term Ds relationship that will ideally lead to marriage with an amazing man who will be my boy for life, but you must know now that I am a semi-professional dominatrix who is fairly well-known and you must accept this.
If you are so deeply closeted that anything in your life may be compromised via your connection with me there is no point in approaching.
A lifetime living this life has shown me how near-imposible it can be to make the connection we both seek. I am not beyond relocation should the circumstances permit and neither are you.
I will also clearly state here that the man who will be my boy is a MAN. I am not into cross-dressers or adult babies.
It is also a loving, romantic and very erotic union I need. Humiliation games are not my thing.
Cuckolding is a very hard limit for me as well. We are both monogamous with the rare exception - I am somewhat bisexual and will occasionally play with women for my own fulfillment rather than fulfilling some male three-some fantasy.
I seek the man who will be my boy, my best friend, my lover, my slave, my beloved pet, my student and my teacher. The yang to my yin. My other half.
I want my next relationship to be my last and take this process very seriously.
If you do not, we are not a match.
I am a very busy woman. Occasional sessions with select clientele, professional employment, the juggling of numerous projects, focus on my health and showing my family and friends that I appreciate them can be time-consuming. I will, of course, absolutely make time for courtship should I see tangible signs of real potential - and I have a tough screening process.
You will agree that this process is important and are not into short-cuts either.
You wish to earn your way into my life and into my heart as will I work at earning my way into yours.
The things that are important to me are easily demonstrated in the qualities I seek in my partner that follow in the lengthy text down below.
I will add that there is a frivolous side to me and that I like it. : )
I want to be Cher when I grow up.
I love fashion as well as costume. I design many of my own fetish outfits and much of my wardrobe looks like it belongs in a theatre.
It is safe to say that I seldom enter a room unnoticed, but it's not always because of what I'm wearing.
Romance is something that inspires me and that I need. I love to hold hands, cuddle, make-out and express love with all the other signs of affection. If you're looking to fulfill some sort of "Bitch Domme" fantasy I am not the woman for you.
I am not religious nor could I ever be with someone who is.
I do believe in a Higher Power, but I do not call it "God" (a masculine noun and this is not at all lost on me). *FYI, I do not call it "Goddess" either as I believe that this energy transcends gender.
The man I can really connect with is spiritual and believes this too.
If you are not local to me, you must have the affluence to arrange for monthly visits at the very least during courtship and I will not engage in constant emailing without having met you in person first. Be practical when considering the expenses in relocation as well and do not contact me unless you know you can make this happen.
We're both busy and not delusional about instant relationships.
While I am marriage-minded and so are you, we're not looking for overnight elopement.
A weekly date, should time and distance permit, as part of a proper courtship matters to both of us should we mutually feel there is potential.
You are single, monogamous and wish to share your life as well as the spoils of your successes with the woman who inspires your devotion.
The qualities I seek in a submissive I could call my own:
interesting, ethical, happy, intelligent, loving, affectionate, selectively submissive, ambitious, sexy, generous, independent, spiritual, disciplined, fun, goal-oriented, focused, serious, educated, extremely well-mannered, financially secure, passionate, courageous, strong in all ways, creative, politically-minded, stable, intuitive, secure, confident, kind and good.
You are not a "bedroom sub" or a mere fetishist, but aspire to the perfect partner to an adoring, protective and appreciative Mistress.
While you certainly have your fetishes and limits, they are secondary to mine as you seek to be a true slave finding your bliss in dedicated service to the woman you will give yourself to.
You are an Alpha-type and not at all a "wimp". You don't ever just give away your submission, but have been searching high and low for a woman who deserves you and what you bring.
You answer to no one and have nothing to lose should it be discovered that you are involved with me. You are secure in your sexuality as a submissive male. You are probably a self-made man and I suspect inpired by art if not creative.
Physically...
I prefer younger men - roughly 30-40 years of age.*If you're in terrific shape I will go as far as 45.*
Tall - preferably at least 6'.
Fit - you take your health very seriously and are athletic.
A younger, handsome beefcake.
Someone who takes pride in his appearance without being totally vain. Stylish is good too. Please have a fashion sensibility.
I want arm candy.
: )
You are a romantic and fully attentive lover, putting your Mistress' desires before your own.
You don't have or want children and are willing to get a vasectomy if you haven't already had one.
Outside of our careers, families and social groups you and I will focus entirely on one another, without distraction.
Ideally, I want an eternal honeymoon.
You love animals - especially cats and dogs - and may have pets of your own.
You strongly believe in using your affluence for contribution to society. The concept of working on a philanthropic project with your life partner is something that deeply moves you.
You feel equally at ease stylishly dressed for a night of dancing, in a t-shirt, jeans and hiking boots for a serious walk in the country, a formal suit for a gala event, in a latex catsuit at a fetish event or totally naked for a cuddle in front of a movie.
You love what you have earned, but are not a snob.
You have a solid work ethic, but know how to let your hair down - within reason, of course. No addicts, please.
It is my intention to find these qualities in someone I can respect, admire, love and really share space with.
The submissive I can feel this way about is open-minded in all ways (not only in regards to kink), yet has strong beliefs and values.
You are healthy and well-balanced (I know this lifestyle attracts a lot of damaged goods in both the Domme and submissive roles) and have a solid support network.
You have a healthy social life and love your family.
You understand that a Mistress/slave relationship surpasses play or "kink" - it is a way of life. You have probably been disappointed along your own search by pretenders who did not "get it".
You are so ready for more.
HERE I AM.
Understand that I am not without a sense of humour or compassion. I insist on a careful and detailed negotiation process.
I don't expect instant results and either do you.
What I am writing about here is a long-term, real and loving relationship with a D/s twist.
You know this takes time to develop.
I am a demanding, exacting woman and insist on total control once trust has been cultivated. I know this can only happen once a real connection is made and we've earned each other's trust.
The submissive who will interest me is humble, but not humiliated. He has a strong sense of self and accomplishment as he is a person who accomplishes much. An achiever.
You crave a connection with a Woman of Power who will not only possess you, but will respect, admire, value, protect and adore you as any possession worth owning is worthy of all this and more.
You are a happy, independent and busy person seeking to fully surrender to a loving, dominant woman for life.
You not only understand the value of the courtship process, you see the beauty and the poetry in it and look forward to it. It isn't a chore, but rather a joy.
I have not included my photo as it tends to attract useless approaches from men who just won't read. I will say I am a beautiful, tanned, curvaceous brunette and jaws tend to drop when people learn my age. I suppose this means I look younger. The lifestyle keeps me young. : )
If you have the courage and vision to make your (and my) fantasies a reality, send me a proper letter of introduction:
1) a clear picture of you (nothing vulgar please)
2) express what it was about my profile that moved you to making contact
3) share with me your level of experience
4) Tell me about your career.
5) share with me the achievement you are proudest of
6) tell me what it is you have to offer
7) tell me what it is you feel you need to learn from me
8) tell me what it is you feel you may teach me
9) be certain you sign it with respect and therefore with your name and not your handle.
I repeat, someone I could accept must be cool, interesting and together enough for me to want to spend my life with. This has to start with a solid friendship for there to be a chance at so much more.
I administer control with joy, appreciation and aion.
Once you've made it this far.
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Had a wonderful visit with the woman I had mentioned before and was she ever prepared.
She actually brought with her a complete pedicure kit and gave me one of the most amazing foot treatments I have ever had. A foot massage with scented oils while drinking red wine. A perfect Friday night.
Today, an early morning to take one of my cats to the vet to investigate some disturbing symptoms. I thought for sure it was cancer and that I'd be looking at a terrible prognosis.
Glad I went when I did.
I'ts not cancer.
It is a rather grave, but treatable malady requiring surgery.
My little girl is going to make it.
: ) |
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Music can have such a tremendous effect on one's mood.
I'm curently working on another session playlist and am really excited to play this mix as part of my next scene. |
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A great example of the type of mail women get here all the time - if you read my profile you will see how tremendously useless this is to me and women like me...
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hi mistress.............. i want to be ur slave...... i want to live near ur feet................. i wana serve u till my last breath....... plz give me one chance to show u my devotion........ will obey ur every order......and i have web cam......regards XYZ"
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*name removed to protect the idiot spammer.*
I swear, women receive spam here every day and the senders really believe we don't know it for what it is.
FYI, I report it every time.
: ) |
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I want to be Cher when I grow up - at least my own kind of Cher.
That woman is the ultimate FemDomme.
64 years old and look at her.
In terrific shape, disciplined - how can someone be that skilled and successful without hard work? - and not afraid to speak her mind.
I feel it's important for people to have mentors. I've never really had one from a-near, but if someone can be a mentor from a distance I suppose she must be mine in having set such a tremendous example.
I truly admire her.
I find it interesting the amount of writing I've seen and talking I've heard about the amount of work a solid slave or even submissive must engage in, but there's little writing or talk about the work a domme must engage in to be an example of excellence.
Calling oneself "MistressXYZ", demeaning others and finding those weak enough to take it might make one a domme, however engaging in a disciplined lifestyle enabling personal empowerment and achievement as well as being a positive role model to others could make a woman a Goddess. |
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I find it fascinating that even without my pictures I'm getting messages that have little or nothing to do with what I'm here for.
Interesting. |
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So many people seem to be under the critical delusion that no two dommes can occupy the same space. Nothing could be further from the truth.
The fact of the matter is that dominant women really do enjoy the company of other dominant women.
Dominant women have other dominant women among our closest friends...and we share information.
Yes, fellas, we do talk about you.
We tell each other about the men who failed to follow through, the men who dropped the ball, the men who stopped emailing for no apparent reason, the men who didn't show up for a date without so much as a cancellation call, the men who weren't compatible and became abusive when we said "no thank you", the men who were rude on a date AND the men with whom it couldn't work out, but would be great for someone else.
Today I was approached from someone who stood up a close friend of mine.
It is always acceptable to have a change of heart early on in communications, but it is never acceptable to stand someone up.
When I expressed to him that I knew who he was and what he did to my friend he denied it.
When I held fast to what I knew to be true - she actually showed me his profile here - he then tried to say he would "never" do the same to me.
I said to him that if I could even believe this, the fact was that he was capable of treating someone - especially one of my best friends - this way.
He remained insistent.
Another man blocked.
Gentlemen, be aware of this. This should not be your reasoning for thinking to cancel a date or sending a polite note expressing a lack of compatibility, but will hopefully make you think twice before treating anyone - woman or not - with disrespect.
The respect we extend to another is a measure of the respect we hold for ourselves. |
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I love men. I really do.
For most of my life, the majority of my friends have been men.
Having had so many men in my life, I can say that what seems to be the most common complaint they have about women is that we do not clearly state what we want. That we can be passive-aggressive and expect them to guess what we want.
The thing about dominant women is that we know what we want, we are not shy about communicating it and yet men still seem unaware. They don't listen or read.
I know a number of women on this site. Most of my female friends are dominant women and many are Female Supremacists like myself.
We clearly state what we want in our profiles and even go to great lengths to express in our profiles EXACTLY how we wish to be approached.
It can be quite frustrating that, even in this arena, men claiming to be "service oriented" and submissive will ignore such direction and approach without having followed the directions we have taken the time to write into our profiles.
I have been on this site now for less than 24 hours to find my mailbox flooded with approaches from men who are too young, too old, too short, not local and too broke to travel and certainly relocate and too laissez faire to follow my approach directions.
To offer up some examples...
An approach from a 5'9", under-employed, 47 year old, over-weight man when I clearly state I want fit, tall, successful and 30-40 (up to 45 if he is in terrific shape).
The 20 year old in the US who would not take "no" for an answer - I had to block him. Assuming I was a pederast, unless this kid has a massive trust fund he is not able to relocate to me. Again, he would not take "no" for an answer. My god!
The multitudes of waste-of-everyone's-time messages from men trying hard enough to essentially communicate "Heya, nice profile. How ya doin'?" when I clearly state I will not respond to someone who does not meet my criteria or approach as clearly directed.
Typically men with little or nothing about themselves in their profiles other than "No fakes. Please don't waste my time".
I have been on this site under my other profile for about 5 years now. The most common complaint from many of the men here - having read some journals and engaged in some messaging - is that the women are either phonies or unapporachable.
Gentlemen, we women are entitled to our standards as are you.
So many of you want the leather or latex goddess with the perfect figure to cater to your every fetish on your terms. Ironic that when dominant women publish to sites like this one who and what we want you don't seem to care one bit.
Don't get me wrong. I am not at all jaded, which is why I have created this profile with the very real goal of connecting for life with one very special man. I know it will be challenging, but anything worth having is worth waiting for and working toward.
It's just that I'd rather my mailbox remain empty until someone with the potential to be my partner approaches as I have clearly directed.
You only get one chance at a first impression.
It does not make any sense to blow it.
Read the profiles, THINK before responding and then read your reply before sending.
Mindfullness matters.
It is for this very reason that I am working on a manual for men like you to learn how to approach. No matter what a woman has taken the time to already tell you in her profile you just can't seem to get it.
That being said, thank goodness for the few rare gems I have seen here. While there may be some compatibility and/or relocation issues between us, they show tremendous promise at being able to serve another woman.
It is men like you who give me hope.
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Haven't been here long and I've already had to block someone who would not take "no" for an answer.
Yep, "submissive". |
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I created this profile only 2 hours ago and I've already been approached by men who do not at all fit the bill. Fellas, read the profiles.
The thing about dominant women is that we do know what we want and we're not afraid to communicate it. When you ignore the criteria clearly posted in a lady's profile, the first thing you're communicating is that you're incapable of or unwilling to take direction.
So much for your wish to serve, huh?
It's not rocket science. |
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