This is a sample of how vivid and wicked imagination I have and how I love using it to torment and drive her nuts with desire while helping us spend some time mingling with vanilla friends.

I have had different variations of this scenario acted out but never kept the actual written instructions I gave so I have to reconstruct it now… for that case it is a slight dream and will use my favorite sports team. Now a real note needs to be made… I am not a typical male who watches all sports or any sports on a regular basis for that fact. I do enjoy the major games … world series… super bowl and such, but I do enjoy using sports contests in general to decide some sort of an out come… one never knew a submissive could become such a baseball fan until the fact that if her beloved Cardinals won or lost decided if she got have an orgasm that day or not… and baseball being what it… with 3 and 4 game played in so many days a losing streak tends to mean a little bit more J

Super Bowl Sunday….. the terms, consequences and actions to be carried out during our super bowl party at our home with “non lifestyle” friends attending.

Pet… you have chosen the Steelers and I of course have the Saints…. Prior to the beginning of said game no orgasms for 72 hours prior… unless I say otherwise…. For the game we will be at home with our group of friends for our super bowl party… you will have all needed items cleaned and ready in our bedroom which will be off limits to our guests. You will get to wear your Steelers jersey , white shorts and suitable under garments… as normal during any such function be close by to meet any needs I may have… you know how to conduct yourself at these gatherings….

The game….

At the beginning of the game… no special action taken…. If the saints score first and take the lead you will excuse yourself and go to our bathroom and apply ones application of toothpaste to your clit… stroking your clit for 7 minutes without cumming… and then rejoin us in the game room. If the Steelers score first… no action taken enjoy the game… and yes ribbing me is allowed… each time during the first quarter that the saints either take the lead or increase their lead you will excuse yourself to our room and apply toothpaste and stroke yourself for one minute for every point that your team is losing by, during this time you may NOT cum. Also when you are done stroking yourself you may wipe your fingers, lick them clean but you CAN NOT wash them.

If the Saints are winning at the end of the 1^st quarter you will excuse yourself to our room and prep and insert your medium butt plug and rejoin the party. You may wash your hands after inserting said plug. The plug will remain in place until either the Steelers take the lead or the end of 2^nd quarter. If the Steelers are leading after the first quarter you will excuse yourself to our room and insert benwa balls. The benwa balls will remain in place until the Saints take the lead or the end of the 2^nd quarter. If during the time the balls are in place (which means the Steelers are still leading) you can achieve an orgasm you may but only while in the game room. During the 2^nd quarter each time the saints take or increase the lead you will apply more toothpaste as before including stroking yourself.

At the end of the 1^st half… if the Saints a winning you will excuse yourself our bedroom and wit for me… when I arrive you will have to hurry and pleasure me orally of course swallowing when allowed to… the butt plug will be removed… your remote controlled vibrating toy will be put in place and we will re join the group… I of course will have the remote and torment you as I desire. If the Steelers are winning then I will make my way to our room and you will join me there and I will torment you orally bringing you to as many orgasms as possible before we are missed… and no I will not wash my face only wipe it clean…. You will remember that smell each time I give you a kiss.

More to come….

I long to whisper sweet words of torment into her ear, the ones that make her pulse race. To watch as that sexual tension and desire builds. To control her desire and her pleasure is a great pleasure to me. I long to be the thought that keeps running through her mind, the one that makes her smile and blush. I search for the woman who will complete me and give my dominance the meaning and purpose it needs to serve.  Yes, that is correct, what is a Dominant without a submissive worthy of His attention, His affection and all of His actions.

I desire to hold her in my arms and feel her heart race, to look into her eyes and see the desire to please. I seek one who is strong enough and able to stand on her own two feet yet knows that she is only complete when she is kneeling before her man. She must desire kneel before her man not feel, or think that submitting is her only way to be with a man. She must be wise, patient and careful to choose a man who has shown himself to be worthy of her submission. A man who knows the great responsibilities that ownership carries. A man who has an imagination which keeps her on her toes. I desire to be that man who comes to mind when she feels that need to be used well, for she knows that it gives me great pleasure to use her for my pleasure.

I long to hold her in my arms and feel her shudder through an earth shattering orgasm. One that has made her toes curl and one which she have had to ask for permission to have, yet knowing that simply asking does not automatically mean she will get to cum. I long to know her better than she know herself, to know what will calm her and what will drive her nuts with desire. I long to watch her endure discomfort and pain that will bring me pleasure. To know that she is enduring it for me and while it may hurt it will bring her great pleasure to see the joy in my face and to hear those simple words…”you have pleased me greatly.” I long to hold her hand as we stroll through a park, a mall, or the beach.. to most outsiders we will seem like the madly in love couple, yet to know us would show just how deep that love, affection, compassion and respect goes in both directions. For our relationship while based on a Master / submissive foundation it is not about simple pain, or denying actions or affection but about growth, communication and love.

I seek a woman to share all aspects of life, from a quiet dinner at home, a cook out at the beach, a get away to the mountains camping, to a weekend away at romantic city. We must be able to function in both worlds; the lifestyle side as well as the vanilla side. While she will be owned that does not mean she will not have her circle of friends or her activities she enjoys doing, but she will understand and accept that "He" will have final say so if he feels any other those activities are being a negative factor in her or their lives.

So I ask you… are you out there for I am looking for you… Are you she that I seek… are you the one?  Don't waste anymore time.  Reach out and let's begin this journey that we have both been longing for. 

A Sensual Sadistic Tormenter…

Yes that would describe me very well. I truly enjoy the soft sensual side at times while other times I like to inflict the sweet pain that reminds her that she is owned. I love that intimate secret between a dominant and his submissive, something that they both know yet nobody else does. The one that while out in public, makes her blush when she recalls her latest act of submission. Those are the kind of thoughts that I desire to produce with my actions and the tasks I give her. Let me give you some examples. We have all attended Company Christmas parties… a time when we all dress up and bring our significant others. Prior to said event I am sure you would have desired to purchase a new dress, fairly common for a lady to get a new outfit for an event as I mentioned, but while you selected a new dress I would select, purchase and give you the under garments. While I will take pleasure in seeing you in that pretty dress I will enjoy seeing you in the new under garments as well. Now as long as no female issues were present (yes your menstrual cycle) you could find yourself wearing that dress to that event with a garter and no panties on. The whole night you would feel the nakedness under your dress and it would serve as a reminderJ. Just before we left the house you could very well find yourself across my lap for a good sound spanking, one that turns your bottom red and will keep it sore the most of the night… once again another subtle remind of your place and of our special relationship. Now this spanking is not a punishment spanking or for any reason other than my desire to see you bottom turn red, watch you squirm on my lap and so your bottom is nice and warm and sore during the party. Add to that I may have not let you have an orgasm in the last three days, while getting you aroused and keeping you there. Once a gain a subtle reminder, when at the party I lean in and whisper in your ear that when we get home I plan to fuck your brains out, hopefully it will have the desired affect. Now during the party while we dance to slow song I will certainly whisper in your ear how pretty you look, and ask you if you think anyone can tell how horny you are, or that under the dress you are not wearing any panties, or what would your co-workers think if they new that before you left the house tonight you were draped across your man’s lap and spanked well. Perhaps your bottom is sore enough that when I caress it you catch your breath. Now keep in mind none of this is done to humiliate you, make you feel cheap, or such. It is done to enjoy that special relationship which we have. I firmly believe that a submissive is prettier that a regular woman, and that a horny woman is prettier yet, and that a woman who is in the middle of that earth shattering orgasm is absolutely gorgeous. I love turning my submissive on, slowly building that heat and desire for an orgasm, then keeping her at that boiling point until she feels ready to explode. Then perhaps when the offer of finding a private corner or a locked study will seem like a wonderful idea J.

What this lifestyle means to me….

            Well of course this lifestyle is very personal and will mean different things to each person who is involved in it.  So it is very important to really get to know what that person’s views and such are. I understand that there is no right or wrong answers, there are some basic common threads but it is a very unique, complex and individual way of being. So with out any more stalling here are my views, thoughts, feelings, and reason why I love to be who I am and what being a “Dominant” means to me.

            To me this lifestyle is all about feelings. This lifestyle allows me to be who I am naturally. It is not about making my woman suffer or not allowing her to do things just because I can. It is about making her feel things about herself, about me and about us. I want the random thoughts that run through her mind, the thoughts that make her smile, blush, tear up and even filled with joy beyond belief. This lifestyle to me is about caring, compassion, discipline, respect, and many more. To me a very big part of this is the simple fact that submission is not TAKEN, it must be offered to me by her. It is her choice to offer herself to me to be my submissive and to serve me. It is her desire to please me and to give me the control, over the different aspects of her life.

            Respect is critical and it works both ways. She must respect me for the place I hold in our relationship. Not a place which I have taken but a place she has given to me as the person to whom she has selected to serve. I must respect her as the person she is. Just because she is submissive and offered herself to me does not make her less of a person. Although I will dominate her I must always respect her as the very special woman which she is. Her respect for me is paramount as it the basis for how she will interact with me. While she is submissive to me she must know, see and feel that I am a person of high character, integrity,

Orgasms denial and control….

I was asked once why I would want to deny my submissive the ability to have an orgasm…

Well my first response was because what good does it do to have her ask permission to cum if she has never been told no and had to stop and go for a day or so without that orgasm. Always saying yes will tend to make the whole act of asking permission to cum just a mere formality. Now if you really want to see a reaction… say no and make her get dressed and move on to the next actions. Now I do not say no all the time but often I will make her wait… have her stop and then restart and ask again. Yes there is plenty of mental fucking going on and I would not have it any other way. The act of not allowing her to have an orgasm for a day or two would fall under orgasm control, in my humble opinion, my reason for doing this is because I want her to thinking about me as she feels that need and desire building within her. Let me just state for the record that I believe that a submissive women is prettier and sexier that a non submissive vanilla woman, and a woman who is horny and aroused is prettier yet and a woman who is longing and desiring for that sexual release is even more prettier and a woman who is final allowed to play with herself and is racing toward that orgasm that she so desperately desires, needs, is about to reach is the most beautiful creature on this planet. I am in awe and completely mesmerized by her actions add to that the fact that I played a major part in getting her to that point and it truly is the whole reason for me being the Dominant that I am. I get great joy and pleasure seeing, hearing, hearing about, imagining and even participating in her race toward that orgasm. Imagine not being allowed to have an orgasm for 2 days, and on the 3^rd day we spend the afternoon together, perhaps taking a road trip a casual dinner during all of this you feel my breathe and nibbles on your neck and ears while I whisper my plans for you later… of course you are turned on by my actions I should know you well enough to get your motor running as well as other things… but since you have not had an orgasm for a couple of days these feelings will be greatly amplified… now when we get home I whisper in your ear that you are so very special to me and that I wish to see you cum good and hard so I am going to lay down and you are going to straddle me, impaling yourself and riding my to that orgasm you have wanted now for 3 days… you tell me will you ride like a cowgirl at the world finals rodeo racing toward that orgasm which has been building all afternoon and the ones that you have been able to have. During which time I get to enjoy the sight, sound, and view of you being just a horny slut wanting that orgasm.

Of course if that reason is not good enough… here is the bottom line… if she is mine and have given herself to me, and has agreed to submit to my wishes and desire… well her orgasms belong to me and I will allow her to enjoy them if, when, where and how I DESIRE her to.

Feel free to share any thoughts, questions, or opinions.

Her Brains… opinions…

I am not looking for a doormat, this I have said before but let’s take a closer look at what that means.

Yes she needs to be able to stand on her own two feet; while she may be independent she must enjoy spending time with her man. She may very well know more than me on some subjects from which I will draw knowledge and yes become a better person and dominant. She would always have the ability to give her opinion and views as long as they are done at the proper time and way. We have all heard the phrase, “there is a time and place for everything,” this is very true in this aspect, there will be a time to discuss the options and best way to do something and she will have a large part in that process, but the end decision is “mine” now I am not the type of person who feels I know everything… so I will listen and evaluate the information I get and make my decision based on the information I have, and this decision is not always what I want or thought but what is best for us, her and me. Will she be allowed to mouth off at me in front of others no but that goes back to general behavior rules… At times she will have situations that she will handle, I do not need to micro manage… she needs to feel capable of taking care of things.

She is not weak, her giving up control is not weakness, it takes great strength to give control to another. I know I have explored it. Her strength, desire and need to give herself to me makes her submission so mush sweeter.

Thoughts on this subject?

Here are some thoughts and experiences concerning the vanilla side…

I pride myself in being a well rounded person, I often find myself in a variety of vanilla situations, even in these situations I enjoy my dominant role when I spend said time with a willing partner. I truly enjoy the subtle personal secret that only the two of us know; perhaps the fact that just prior to leaving the house she was laid across my lap and received a good sound spanking, and that is why she is doing more standing than sitting. A family gathering is a great place to keep her mind racing, who would imagine that while we are all gathering around the table for Thanksgiving dinner she may have her butt plug in place. Or while at the 4^th of July BBQ she has a remote controlled vibrator pressing against her clit which is driving her closer and closer to orgasm. That Christmas party to which she wore that new dress, yet was naked underneath… and the fact that “we” disappear for a bit… could it be the coat closet we are in. Soft whispers in her ear are a favorite of mine, a little comment about how red her bottom was before we left the house… or perhaps what things I have in store for her when we get home. Of course a soft whisper in her which simply says “hummm you are beautiful and could not imagine sharing my life with anyone else” followed by a soft kiss on her neck and a nibble. Of course I enjoy it greatly when she whispers in my ear… telling me how horny she may be or how she wishes to be taken later.

What are your thoughts on these things?

The Dominant Man

          In my humble opinion “The Dominant Man” is a man who has integrity, devotion, compassion, knowledge, conviction, accountability, understanding, patience, and sincerity. He must develop and grow in all these areas for they are what will make him the man he is. 

Integrity-                He must hold true to his convictions and views. He should strive to do his best in each situation. He does need to agree with others views for he will have is own, but he need to stay true to them.

Devotion-              He must be devoted and committed to his nature. He must not shy away from it but embrace it and learn from it. He must be devoted to his relationship with that special submissive. For he knows that a Dominant with no submissive is only half of a Dominant.

Compassion-         He must compassion for his submissive. He must understand that while she is there for his pleasure, she has needs, desires and feelings as well. If his true desire is to help her grow and make their relationship last her needs must be met. He understands that his act of taking her as his submissive does in fact mean that he will meet her needs.

Knowledge-           He must possess the basic knowledge needed to own another person, yet he must understand and accept that gaining knowledge and learn will be a continuous and never ending endeavor. He must strive to always learn more. He must not afraid or too proud to admit he does not know something and seek out those who do.

Conviction-           He must hold himself to high standards. He should never do things thinking about what other might think but by what the person he looks at in the mirror will think. He should know right from wrong and strive to do the right thing.

Accountability-      He must hold himself accountable for his actions or lack there of. He should accept the fact that others will hold him accountable, for one can not dominate others without them looking to see if he walks the talk.

Understanding-      He must be open minded and understand that his views may not be the same as others. While he must hold true to his views he must be willing to listen to and accept other peoples views, beliefs and practices. For he knows that only by being exposed to other ways of doing things can one learn and experience this lifestyle.

Patience-               He must have patience to train and show his submissive what he wants and desires. He realizes that a calm soothing voice does wonders to help her  learn his desires and wants.

Sincerity-               He must always be sincere and honest in all his actions. He knows that trust is a major part of this lifestyle and his relationships.

          To me being a dominant man is not about always getting what I want, but doing what is best. For me this lifestyle is all about feelings, emotions and actions. I enjoy evoking a wide range of feelings and thoughts. I desire to be the man she thinks of when she is having a bad day, the one who she knows can brighten her day, blow away the storm clouds which seem to be over head. When she thinks of that man who makes her horny with desire I want to be the man she thinks about. When she thinks of someone to “hang out with” just kicking it, I want to be that man. I want to be the man with whom she feels safe and secure. I desire her to feel secure to share all her inner most thoughts, desires and fantasies, for me the fact that she feels so comfortable and secure with me that she can share those thoughts is absolutely beautiful. I believe that a true dominant man must posses the knowledge, ability and experience to make his woman feel the complete spectrum of feelings. He should be able to make her feel safe and secure, complete raw desire and lust, accountability where she knows that she is accountable to him for her actions, unpredictability where she is not sure what is coming next and accepts that it is his will. 

          Being this Dominant allows me to be myself… to show my compassion and caring side without concern that those actions will be misunderstood as anything other than the true feeling for which they are intended.  Being the man I am allows me to build that desire within her and later reap that reward. Of course be with a submissive female allows me to enjoy this lifestyle knowing that she desires to please me, to do the things which I request because it is simply my desire. I like to see her arousal build and to know that she must ask and wait for my permission to have that orgasm she desires so much.  Being this dominant allows me to enjoy and explore all the aspects of this lifestyle.

          Me being a “Dominant Man” is not a practiced way of being but completely natural on a day to day basis. Yet I know and feel that I do not control everyone and everything around. Only those who have given me the right and power to dominate them can control, I also believe that this is an ongoing learning thing. I accept the fact that I am not perfect and will make mistakes, but I vow to learn from my mistakes.

Random thoughts….

She “My Woman” is here for my Pleasure…what a simple concept, yet what does it really mean. Well to me it means the following. When I desire to look at a pair of breasts as they strain against a tank top on a warm summer days, hers should be there. When I desire to drive her nuts with lust and anticipation for things to come, she is the one who’s ear I will whisper into. When I desire to watch a pretty pair of but cheeks turn from pale to pink to bright red, hers’ are mine to paint with my hands. When I desire to listen to her slow groan as I slowly take her, she will present herself to me for this pleasure. When I desire to see a woman squirm, thrash about and gasp from skillfully playing with her pussy, she is the one who will make herself available for my touch. When I want to watch a pair of nipples get hard from my caress, even to the point of becoming sore from cloth pins, she will remove her top giving my access to hers. When I desire a lusty wench who is eager to be mounted by her man, she will race to strip so that I may enter her in a single thrust. When I desire to watch her glow from a simple act of kindness, to her I will give a single rose on an ordinary day, for no other reason than to let her know she is my most cherished possession. When we have a formal event to attend, she will be the lady on my arm, dresses in that new dress which flatters her figure. She will enjoy being that lady on my arm while enjoying the memories of how just minutes before leaving the house she was laying across ,my lap being spanked just so her bottom would match the red garter set.  

I am her man…. These are some thoughts and views about what I feel it means to be her man, her Dominant. When she needs to be held close and made to feel protected and safe, let it be my arms she seeks. When she thinks about last night events and why she is sore, let those thoughts bring back a picture of me. When what she needs is to be placed across a sturdy lap for a good spanking, let her come to me with those pretty eyes down cast. When late at night she falls asleep on “his” chest, let that be my chest she is most comfortable with. When she feels that desire deep inside building what can only be satisfied with a rock hard cock, let her work me to that rock hard state and then be taken as she needs to be. When she needs her best friend to listen to a problem let me be the one she calls upon. When she hears of a new twist in bed let her first thoughts of who to try it with be me. When she hears from a friend how things have gone bad in her relationship let her think of how I make her smile yet know that I do so because I want to not because I have to. When she hears my voice she become arouse from memories of past soft whispers.

When we are at a function or commitment that is less than entertaining, she can lean on mean knowing that while we “must” be here, we are together and that makes it better.

When she needs to vent because something at work went wrong, let her come to me knowing I will truly listen, hold her, without me trying to fix it. When what she really would like to do is spend time just laying in my arms, she knows that I am there.