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In vanilla life I'm a chef and writer: furiously interested in subcultures, philosophy, psychedlia, alternative living, festivals, gender politics, chip shops, nerdy things, books, trees, and kinky sex.
Specific to BDSM, I'm into the psychological. Love the idea of ownership, teasing, obedience, etc. Not too much of a pain fan, either giving or recieving.
I'd say I was switch, leaning heavily from one side to the other as I explore more.
One thing that doesn't change is that I need to have an actual relationship with anyone I'm with. I'm polyamorous, but a firm believer that you can have mulitple partners witout being a dick about it. And that, for me at least, means taking the time to get to know people and genuinely caring.
Since joining here last year I've met someone very special. Though she lives miles away from me, we are embarrassingly happy exploring kink, each other and ourselves. I love her deeply, and that isn't about to change. That said, our love is built firmly on the premise that if you love someone, you should allow them to freely to explore all that life has to offer, including other meaningful relationships.
We are also open to the possibility of meeting new people as a couple, if it feels right. But it's not something we're willing to force.
I hate taking things *too* seriously: 24/7 D/S relationships, monogamy, and needy dependence are things I've tried in the past and had no luck with. I'm much happier to just make friends, talk about anything and everything, and see where it goes :)
So if you're fun and adventurous, get in touch. I'm always up for meeting new people.
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