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I am new to this site as of 7/29/13. However have been in lifestyle for 10 years. Mostly online, however, 3 of the years were scening real time. I am a considerate Dom who respects submissives. I understand how a sub/Dom relation is a partnership with each side respecting what the Oother desires. Don't take that to mean I am not firm or "weak" I assure you I am not. I just know what it takes to get most submissives to honor My desires. Ask Me questions and I will happily answer the best I. Can This article helps describe Me. First, please understand the context. I am not talking about ownership by legal title, human chattel, indentured servitude nor any other form of illegal human ownership otherwise known as slavery. Instead, I mean to discuss models of human relationships whereby the parties involved agree to an ownership dynamic within their private intimate relationship. Also, while I speak in terms of a male owner and female property because that is my own dynamic, this does not imply that the subject of ownership must coincide with my chosen gender roles, it'll work with whomever's on top. Model #1 - Ownership As Taking Consider an owner who has a girl as his property. The girl comes to him upset and in tears one day about some matter he regards as trite. He chooses to ignore her and takes her over to her best friend's house. She believes he's taking her there to have her friend console her. But, upon arriving, he ties her up to a chair and commences to seduce her best friend whom he eventually fucks in front of her. When he's done fucking his girl's friend, he cuddles with her and gives her friend the emotional support that his girl was in need of. Finally, when he's done, he unties his girl, takes her home, and proceeds to ignore her, telling her to go to bed and quit being a downer. Model #2 - Ownership As Giving Consider an owner who has a girl as his property. The girl comes to him upset and in tears one day about some matter he regards as trite. He asks her kindly and calmly about the issue and discovers that she has serious confusion and misgivings about their relationship. She tells him that she's growing afraid of how much she loves him and depends on him and that she feels she is losing her independence. He calmly reassures her that he does not want her to become dependent, but to be interdependent with him. She doesn't understand the difference so he explains it and gives her some material to read on the subject matter. A while later she returns and says that it sounds good in theory but she needs some time to figure out what she wants. He tells her that he would not want her to be his unless it is a "Hell, Yes!" for her and suggests she take the time to figure out if she is, indeed, in the right place. She hints that going to her best friend's might help. He drives her over there and requests that she call him when she's ready to return but that if it takes longer than three days he will take it as a signal that she wishes not to return and that she must not return until she is enthusiastic to return. She agrees, kisses him at her friend's door, and walks in telling her best friend about the wonderful man she's with. Model Comparison To some, Model #1 is sexually hot; and, I will admit that in a particular set of circumstances where there was a consensual arrangement between the three parties involved as to what was going to happen, this sort of adventure might be fun to play out .. but only in a dramatization of the real thing and only amongst people mature enough to deal with the emotional issues that may arise from such actions. But, Model #1 is not talking about that sort of arrangement. It is about the kind of owner that is emotionally cruel "just because he can". He likely holds some power (financial, emotional, sexual) over her and he takes delight in abusing that power to emotionally terrorize his property. In other words, the owner in Model #1 believes that he has the right to force his property to be at his beck and call whenever he pleases and to do any manner of physically and emotionally cruel acts upon her, without her consent, because she consented to everything his brain could think up for all time and eternity when she consented to be his property at the start. To some, Model #2 looks so boring it is about equivalent of a vanilla relationship, and I admit that without a little spice going on, it could grow rather dull if all the property has to offer to her owner is a bunch of doubt and angst. But Model #2 is talking about a thriving relationship that is synergistic and productive for both parties. The relationship has hit a road bump causing the owned girl to have some second thoughts. Take note of his responses to her concerns. In dealing with her emotionality, he does the following: Listens to her carefully Acknowledges her concern as real and valid Teaches her some new concepts (dependence vs interdependence) to help deal with her concern Recognizes her need for time apart to make an assessment Reinforces that he wants her to be enthusiastic about their relationship Drives her to her friend's house with no strings attached Gives her a very simple means by which she can opt out of their relationship Draws a boundary on how long she has to make her decision In other words, he wants the best for her and exerts his wisdom, resources, time and energy in order to influence her to live in her highest and best state. He is thoughtful, but firm. So there are two kinds of ownership: Model #1 is for those owners that want to take from their property and Model #2 is for those owners that want to give to their property. Personally, I think Model #1 is abusive, dangerous, cruel and cold while Model #2 is supportive, safe, kind and warm. I ascribe to Model #2 and abhor Model #1. I suppose I am tolerant enough to let those owners who swim to Model #1's tune have their own end of the pool. It's a big pool and they can stay in their cold end. I will be swimming over here in the warm end. To each their own (end of the pool). Ownership is a privilege, not a power To me, ownership is a sacred responsibility, a privilege, and not some right I have to claim power over someone else. I believe this is the key distinction in the mindset of both owners and property in the two models described above. To be in charge of another human being is about the most significant responsibility anyone can have in this life. Consider the regard that most societies on this planet have for parents. The bond between parent and child is sacred. There is a significant (awe inspiring?) responsibility to bring the next generation into the world to help make this planet better. This high regard for parenting is intertwined into every culture. I view ownership as the same thing, except it is between unrelated adults, not parent and child. For example, suppose I own a really nice car that I have saved up a long time to afford. With that ownership comes many things: I have the responsibility to service it and keep it running well. I have the pleasure of driving it whenever I want. I must fix it when it is broken. I appreciate all the miles of service it provides to me. I must ensure it has fuel to run. I remember all the wonderful trips I've taken with the car. I must ensure that I've paid for it fully lest the repo man comes around. I will value it highly amongst the things that I own. I could enhance it to make it uniquely mine. I am proud of it and like to show it off. I want to use this example to express how I think about ownership of a human being, in particular a female. Of course, a human female is not an inanimate object such as a car. She is a living, breathing, sentient being of immense value .. vastly more valuable than the trifle of paper currency I paid for that Tesla. We could say that she is invaluable because a monetary value cannot and should not be placed on human life. Of all the things I could own, she would always be the most valuable. Now, I could not purchase her for money. Real slavery has been done away with for well over a century. And, morally, because I value human life so highly, I could not imagine trading any sum of money for any human life. The idea is repugnant to me. Yet, I desire to own her, to possess her, and to take ultimate responsibility for her. Not because she can't take care of herself. Indeed, it is because she is highly competent, mature and able that I do wish to possess her. I don't know why I'm like that. I would never buy her, but I do love owning her. And, strangely enough, she desires my ownership, too. The fact that she does, makes me desire to own her even more. What kind of ownership makes a girl desire to be owned? The kind that comes with the analogous things I listed above for owning a car: I have to service her (smirk). I have the responsibility to care for her and ensure that her body, mind, heart and spirit stay in good running order. I have the pleasure of being with her most any time I wish and directing her activities. If she gets down, discouraged or broken, I have a responsibility to lift her up, encourage her and fix her. I have a vast appreciation for all the service she provides, especially the way she uses her intelligence to bring subtle and unique joys into my life. I must ensure that she has enough food to fuel her body. I constantly remember all the wonderful times we've shared and all the places we've travelled, each memory adding value to my life. I must ensure that I maintain a stable financial world so that I have the resources to keep her safe, housed, and away from predators and users. I will always value her as the most significant thing in my life, the possession of highest value I could ever own. I will teach her about me, what I like, maybe put a few markings on her body to make her uniquely mine. I am proud of her, her growth, her accomplishments, and to be associated with her as her owner. Conclusion To own someone is the highest calling a person can have. It is an IMMENSE responsibility and it is based on what one can GIVE, not what one can TAKE. An owner's focus will be on what sexual delights he can give to his property, not what sexual service he can take from her. He will find more joy in helping her achieve her dreams than making her achieve his because his dream IS to own her and all the responsibility that goes with it. Being an owner requires a resoluteness of character, a strong moral compass, passion, energy and a charitable spirit. In my model of ownership, an owner must always want the highest and best for his property. I believe that if an owner always takes that position, his property will always want to be owned by him. Sure, there's no guarantees, but that principle seems to be the foundation of the best results in O/p relationships that I have seen . And that is just one man's opinion on ownership. Just to clarify since the description has been missed already This piece was NOT written by me it is one I stumbled upon that was written by someone named SirRender -- quiz results Dominant 82% Sadist 64% Experimental 57% Exhibitionist / Voyeur 54% Bondage 36% Switch 32% Vanilla 21% Degradation 18% Submissive 7% Masochist 0%