I had not intended to use this journal feature but i find that i have a need to vent and i figure here is as good a place as any.

I learnt something today.... the worst so called Doms/Masters are the ones who pretend to be there for you, who say I would never do anything to hurt you, i want to help you find what you are looking for.... its not true, its all a lie.  Its all a ploy to lure the unsuspecting and naive and stupid like myself into believing that they do care. 

I really should know better, I mean i have enough people telling me what to look for, what to watch out for that I am almost paranoid about opening up fully to someone so when i do only to have them change the rules of the game midway thru makes it that much more harder to open up the next time thus making it harder to get to know someone who might be Mr Right.

Its taken me a good 12-18 months to finally take this step and move from hiding behind my computer screen in to the real world...the way things are going im wondering if i shouldnt have stayed there.