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TeacherNStudent

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sextoy4u2enjoy

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I've been here for a few years now, and despite having an interest in BDSM for many years, I'm not as experienced as I'd like to be. I've only had two slaves, although I learned something of my strengths and weaknesses from each.

I am polyamorous by choice, but it's not a requirement, twice a widower, and I can leave a palm print on your ass one moment and gently massage it away the next.

I enjoy your unattenuated screams and tears, and I enjoy muffling them with a gag.

I want to learn more about some of the things I've missed, such as electroplay and suspension.

I used to seek both shorter term liasons, and one or more long term situations. However, I now have a slave who wishes ours to be monogamous relationship, and I am honoring that request. Thus, I am now here primarily for conversation.


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1/6/2010 3:44:19 AM
Ms. S will always be a fond memory, and I wish that it had turned out differently.

Since September or October, I have been involved with Ms. T, who seems to enjoy both her training as a slave, and the fact that we are both learning together.  She does not find my relative lack of experience to be off-putting nor a handicap.

I will probably be getting her tattooed and pierced soon, at least, if finances permit.

Alas, like Ms. S, she is a monogamist, which is disappointing, but we get along so well in and out of bed that I am inclined to forgive her this limitation.

Spent the Yule holidays with her family and grandchildren, who are delightful, and managed to hide their heads in the sand whenever the idea that Mama might be having sex.  Some Things Simply Are NOT Done, it would appear.  And that's the vanilla concept they're having problems with.  If they knew the full score . . . well, it would at least be entertaining while the fireworks lasted.

9/7/2009 1:24:23 AM
Ms. S. would make a wonderful companion and slave, if she didn't have so many jobs that she doesn't have room in her life for herself, let alone someone else.

I am very disappointed, not in her, but in our situation, as it seemed I had found someone at last.

I hope that we're able to stay in touch, both as friends, and in case her job situation improves enough that there's room for both of us in her life.

7/18/2009 11:29:39 PM
I shall inform Ms. S. that she is no longer under consideration, as she no longer responds to my communications.

Barring an unusually good explanation and a change in behavior, this, alas, is the end of our relationship.

6/28/2009 7:45:25 PM
Haven't heard from Ms. S. in a week.  Possibly those two evenings were all she wanted.

6/15/2009 11:03:12 PM
So far, things seem to be going well.

I keep pushing too hard, which is difficult to avoid, but other than that tendency, things are progressing.

5/24/2009 9:58:28 PM
I am meeting someone from here on Tuesday, in the traditional venue: some place public.

In all the time I've been on here, this is the first time things have gotten far enough for a first face to face meeting.

Here's hoping that the face to face chemistry is as powerful as the online chemistry has been.

5/22/2009 5:01:58 PM
One of the cruelest things you can do to a devoted sub is ignore her.  Her world tends to center on you, your attention, your touch.  It is why you took her in the first place, was that desire to have someone place you above all else.

So, it shouldn't be much of a surprise that one of the cruelest things a sub can do to her Dom is to ignore him.  Promises made but never kept, phone calls not returned, and everything in her world seems to have a higher priority.  Of course, that means she's not much of a submissive, or at best, needs a lot more training, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.

If you've invested your time in a girl, at the very least, you expect it to be reciprocated.  Which makes the inexperienced sub more problematic than many, as they can be prone to changing their minds.  "Okay, I tried my fantasy, didn't like it, and now I'm off."  Assuming you get that much communication; some girls seem to think that the best way to break up is to simply break off all contact.

If you're old enough, you remember this thing called "manners", which everyone was expected to have, and "politeness", which everyone was expected to practice.  They appear to have been replaced by expediency, or perhaps cowardice.  And the world is a bit worse for the loss.

5/21/2009 9:19:55 PM
It is unfortunate that even in the BDSM community, polyamory is not popular.  Much more popular than in the vanilla community, but still fairly rare.

And a good companion is hard enough to find and keep without placing additional and unnecessary obstacles in the way.

I am going to remove the polyamory "requirement" from my profile and my relationships.  If I click with someone and they propose it, I shall reconsider, but I have no intention of further reducing the likelihood of finding a mate.

The time to talk about getting a second woman is after you've got a first, not before.

5/21/2009 11:06:28 AM
Well, I have an appointment to meet one of the ladies next week. Public location, of course; neither of us are fools.

It's ironic that I'm meeting the one that does not like polyamory, and not the one who likes the idea of a sister slave.  But the latter girl has been evasive and unreliable.  It is very likely that she will be dropped from consideration.

I still have not made up my mind as to whether I wish to continue including polyamory as a requirement in my life.  Going monogamous while keeping it an option if the girl changes her mind is almost like not deciding at all.  It feels like a cheat.

Like most aspects of life, there is much to think about and very few answers.

5/17/2009 2:22:37 AM
Two people have separately gotten me to re-thinking my position on polyamory.

Yes, it was wonderful having an open marriage, and I wouldn't trade two of my lovers from that period for all the slaves on CollarMe, as they were good friends long before we were lovers, and stayed friends long after we were lovers no longer.

But there are two symmetrical questions for me, now.  Do I actually still need two or more women to be happy?  Can I still make two or more women happy? 

From the sexual standpoint, of course not.  Keeping one woman sexually fulfilled is difficult enough.  But can I meet their emotional needs?  I flatter myself that I used to be able to do so, but assuming it was ever true, is it still true?  I don't know.  Being widowered twice may have made me shrink into myself, leaving me less to give to others.

There's also the question of whether I still need more than one woman to meet my own emotional needs.  A good question, and one not easily answered, at least, not without being glib.  Life changes all of us; is this one of the things that has changed in me.

Complicating the process, albeit pleasantly, is the hint that one of the two women I had under consideration might change her mind about me if I were not polyamorous.  Some would simply lie and tell her what she wants to hear and hope to hold her afterward when she learns differently.  But both of the women I'm interested in are looking for someone permanent.  And so am I.

And lies are a great way to turn a long-term relationship into a short-term relationship in nothing flat.

5/14/2009 9:52:27 PM
I have had a long, pleasant conversation with one of the two ladies being considered.  Alas, polyamory remained a sticking point, which is a shame.  She is a lovely, exciting woman, and I hope she finds the one she needs.

I hope to remain her friend, as she is "Good People".

5/3/2009 5:26:05 PM
I now have two women who are under consideration.  Alas, one is opposed to polyamory, so if both prove amenable to training by me, I may find myself having to make a choice between the two.

Given that I've been here for several years and this is the first time things have gotten even this far, I suppose I should savor the irony as well as the opportunities presented.

10/24/2006 4:44:15 PM
Status unchanged.

5/15/2006 8:46:31 AM
I confess to being a bit disappointed:  I've been here for several months now, and while I've gotten a couple of nibbles, no one stayed interested.

And of all the women I've pursued myself, well, that hasn't been very successful, either.  At least some of them showed the respect (and earned MY respect) by writing back and saying they weren't interested.  Rather more have let my letter go into limbo, which I consider very rude.

Well, I've been a most attentive Student here, so while I may never learn more about my own shortcomings, I am learning more about this board's etiquette and behaviors . . .

Bye for now.

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LilPrincessPain
 
 Age: 29
 staten island, New York