I had a friend inquire today as to why I enjoyed playing "meaner" more than "nicely". I rather enjoyed the conversation as it got me to thinking, and I decided to share some of my thoughts here.
As for why I enjoy play "meaner".... well it usually allows me to play rougher, which requires more control on my part. Both in keeping the person in place, and to keep myself on that line of pushing them, but not pushing them to far. To me it is kind of like an orgasm, it is fun to make it to that finish line, but it is even more fun to be on that edge with it right there, but being able to stay right on the edge, not going over.
As for why I enjoy beatings.... well you have the ebb and flow, the loss of control on the bottom's part, and the control of the top. You have the passion of the sadist for what is being done, at the same time you have the wonderful suffering of the mascochist, all balanced on the joy that both share for being able to fulfill their needs, but also their pleasure received in being able to fulfill the other's need. A good scene to me is like any good piece of music, writing, poem, or art.