- The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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TAlyn - photo 1
TAlyn - photo 2
TAlyn - photo 3
TAlyn - photo 5

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Sexy, Mature, BBW dominant seeking playthings/ partners. Must be atleast 21 years of age, with a willingness to learn, explore and have lots of consensual fun. NO dormats or do me queens/kings need apply. An interest, understanding and love of all things "Blakeian" a definite plus. Bonus points if you know what" Blakeian" is or who it refers to. Seeking a Nathanal of my very own or does he only exist in fiction?
Perhaps what I seek will never be found,honesty;sincerity, the abilty to share thoughts with or without written words. I seek an intelligent, witty, self assured submissive with a sense of humor, a sense of self and a sense of adventure.

The submissive I seek is local(atleast in the same state as I or a contiguous one).Clarification: Virginia, NC, MD or DC(not a state but fucking close to me). I will be a part of your life, not your entire life, no on likes a one dimensional individual, that would be too boring(and I don't do boring). Be as fascinating as you want me to be. Life is too short, time is too fleetingly. Honor is forever. I have tried being subtle which has never been my strong suit, my SO and I are in an open relationship . There are no secrets therefore if you must cheat on your spouse, cheat somewhere else with someone else. "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't." Erica Jong

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5/26/2012 10:24:20 AM

Black Rose XXV. So I've registered for BR at Attending with my sister Stormz. Amazed that the cost of parking is more than the cost of gas for the trip from Virginia Beach to DC.

Shall I choose a submissive(if only for the weekend)..decisions decision.


4/22/2012 12:28:05 PM



A promise, pledge or obligation, engagement or involvement. The state of being committed


Thank you

4/2/2012 5:31:58 PM

This past weekend I went to visit my deceased, ex-husbands for submissive.  She and I have remained friends through some rough family issues. She has had multiple strokes and is currently in a cautious state of health with multiple medical issues, confusion and  a serious case of echolalia. She believes that her dominant and I are still married (we divorced in 2004) we still live in Chesterfield Virginia( he is died two years ago next week and I live in Virginia Beach), that my daughter is  5(she will be 18 in the fall) and the year is somewhere between 1999 and 2001. She’s not there anymore—all of the experiences of the past ten years are gone.  When I visited her this weekend end, I walked in on a conversation she was having with Tommy (her deceased dominant). I asked her what she was planning she told me she was leaving soon and that Tommy had come to take her in his pick-up (redneck even after death). Her husband is making plans to take her home—I ‘m not sure she’s going make it back home. I’m more sure she wouldn’t like her current medical/neurological status. I’m thrilled that she only remembers better ,happier times. She wants to go out to WickedHaven –ROPES’ private dungeon in Colonial Hgts and to visit our kinky friends in Richmond. But I’m grieving the loss of my friend Maggie. She has become so much more debilitated since this last round of hospitalizations.  When Stormz and I visited her after CK 2012 she recognized us, welcomed us and had that devilish twinkle in her eye. Now there’s little I recognize. Worse she didn’t recognize me for more than a few minutes at a time.  I had to keep re-orienting   her to me. As I left she continued her conversations and plans to go with Tommy.  I refuse to orient her to time or place. She’s happier where she is.

2/8/2012 6:37:05 PM

If you are attending colonial Kink weekend in March please make sure you say hello. I'll definitely be around.



2/8/2012 6:31:34 PM

I've decided every female dominant wants her very own Nathanial but what we seem to keep atrtracting is Dick(Richard). The search continues.

1/5/2012 5:57:08 PM

ummmm No

11/2/2011 6:36:56 PM

So..this is Austin TX. Not bad{#}

8/23/2011 6:37:12 PM

I survived the 2011 earthquake in Va..go figure.



8/19/2011 9:49:48 AM

Flew in from CT last night and boy is my broom tired.

6/25/2011 1:57:21 PM

 If you don't understand the definition of local please let me clarify: The definition of local means the same continent, same country, hell usually the same state. It's such a simple request but one that seems to be broken the most by potential play partners. Anyone who says local usually means local; except for extreme circumstances. Don't assume you are the exception to the rule, you probably aren't.

6/5/2011 1:31:48 PM

Favorite toys.....hands(mine), a biting wit , a withering stare and you

6/2/2011 4:13:57 PM

I love experiencing new things. Next new thing..Connecticut! What will I wear?


5/17/2011 5:35:13 PM

I've been spending a bit of time speaking with potential submissives. It's always interesting to speak with folks on the phone. That initial call provides me with such insight and helps me to determine if they are someone I want to meet or not. Note: speaking in complete sentences is a plus, grunting is not.  Intelligence=plus, grunting is still a no. Understanding that a meeting sooner than later is a requirement for me, not being able to meet for more than seven days is a deterrent to furthering our relationship. OK it's a damn deal breaker. I don't don't the online thing-it's not me. If you want to stay in fantasy land do so, don't invite me I don't want to come. I prefer the world where I am queen, I rule, make the decisions and generally run the world the way it should be run-under my control<evil grin, but not as evil as my sister>.

4/17/2011 9:38:00 AM

We are well into the second quarter of the year. Life refreshes, the earth blooms anew. Beltane is only a couple of weeks away. I'm ready for warmer weather, longer days and less clothing. I still have time to do all of the wonderful things I want and need to do. My sister is moving back to this side of the Mississippi river and all is well in my universe. Still seeking a submissive yet still refusing to settle.  It's good to be me.



3/20/2011 7:06:15 AM

Question of the day

Can a bisexual dominant be happy with a st8 female submissive? good question.


3/6/2011 7:26:35 PM

Colonial Kink was a fantastic success. They have already slated next years' event for the first weekend in March. I can  hardly wait. There were fantastic seminars, great conversations and incredible awards dinner w/inspirational kinky key note speaker. Such a fantastic lifestyle weekend. So tired but happy; it's time for bed.

2/23/2011 2:53:51 PM

So if your going to Colonial Kink next weekend let me know. I'm always open to meeting new people. 


My sister says I'm a cougar..roar.


2/20/2011 11:20:27 AM

Just a thought...

Can a straight submissive or domme partner with a bi submissive or domme? Sure, as long as everyone understands the rules. MY dream submissive is gay. OK..  one of my dream submissives.

2/17/2011 6:24:39 PM

Just took a tour of you tube to view  Rihanna's new video "S&M". Actually loved it, I understand she was acting out some of her paparazzi issues. However some of her visual interpretations were amusing.(Perez Hilton as a little human puppy about type casting). Too bad she couldn't get Eminem to make a cameo , lol.  Things have changed in many regards over the past decade. I remember when Madonna released the video "Human Nature" with all of those" horrible S&M images". 


So I started searching for "S&M imagery " in videos. Found some fascinating stuff dating back to 1966 The Velvet  Underground and Venus in Furs.  Then there's Queens' " Body Language" with  awesome leather daddies and homoerotica.


some History of S&M in Videos


Want more?

Depeche Mode’s Master And Servant (


Hurts So Good by John Mellencamp (


Village People’s Sex over the phone (



 Every decade or so some female pop star "secretly" tells us they are in the lifestyle; we heard you Madonna, Janet Jackson(ms Jackson if your nasty), Rhiannon. 

Times change, human sexuality doesn't;  the difference is how we respond, react and embrace.



2/12/2011 4:19:48 PM

as I find thing I like or  even if I already know that I like em will add to this list


I like


Geeks & Gleeks






2/12/2011 4:17:20 PM

Tomorrow is the Crossroad munch..spending time with fellow kinksters in a warm and inviting, non stressful atmosphere. I like it! Hope to see you there.

Cross roads Munch will be held on Sunday, 2/13, beginning at 2 pm.

We will be gathering at Reginella's, in Loehman's Plaza, in Va Beach. (That's on Va Beach Blvd, right next to the Central Library, and between Independence and Rosemont) We usually stick around for several hours, so even if you can't be there at 2, come by when you can

I will be there sunday & hope you can make it !!!

2/9/2011 7:30:21 PM

Steven Tyler asking about hand cuffs on  AI. Thank you Goddess!

2/7/2011 7:09:01 PM

For your consideration...


I've been searching for a submissive however my search has been extremely confusing. Not to me mind you but to those "applying" for my consideration. Although listing your likes/dislikes can be an insightful tool, I am more than the sum of my BDSM playlist. Really? Really. I'm so much more than a one dimensional individual. Yes, a BDSM checklist is a nice place to start but there is so much more to explore, to share and to experience. If you are really only a sum of your BDSM playlist don't bother contacting me. It takes more than that to keep me interested. I want more. I've met a few individual locally, recently…without any real sparks. You don't have to be Einstein but please be animated. Show some spark, some preparation, show me just a bit of who you are. Make me want to know you more. Consider this meeting a two way interview --one in which we both know more about each other (even initially) than most interviews you will ever be on. Be prepared, be on time and know your audience.


2/4/2011 9:05:51 PM

Colonial Kink is only a month away. I am so excited. I always love going to lifestyle events. I love to watch the dynamics between dominants and submissives. I love the atmosphere as if we are all in on some big cosmic joke that the rest of the hotel guess(if there are any) don't quite get. I like flexing my Ds muscle, learning new things , sharing with and giving back to my community. It's fun and makes all of the Bs worth it(sometimes). Besides ;my room is  booked, my volunteer duties have been outlined. Now to go shopping for something fabuloso to wear..leather? llace, a corset? Not sure but it will involve boots(more than one pair most likely)--of that  I am sure. Hope to see you there.

1/8/2011 7:40:27 AM

When going to meet a potential partner, don't drink alcohol before the meeting. You look like a fool, smell like a drunk and  will most probably irrevocably annoy the individual you are meeting. There is no coming back from this one.

1/6/2011 11:56:45 AM

Two nights in a row; Happy New Year to me...


The Amatorius Munch happening on Thursday 6th January 2011.

Start time is 7 pm and we'll be hanging out until the last person Leaves.

Ruby Tuesday


1/4/2011 1:49:34 PM

TIED Munch tomorrow night(casual gathering of the community). Come out and join us.

BTW-everyone pays for their own meal

Uptown Buffet

1050 N Military Hwy, Norfolk, VA 23502  7pm , can arrive early to start nibbling.



1/1/2011 2:20:16 PM

A new year, time to plan my annual strategy of world domination..oh wait. Umm ignore that.


I have had some interesting meetings of late with potential submissives and more than a few scene dates.  Some were nice, some not. Some were just do me queens/kings/jesters. Most seemed honest;  however I caught several in outright lies(meetings and dates were quickly terminated). Some were as bland as tapioca, others were just fucking nuts. What they all had in common was that they were just not for me. So my search continues...all I want(other than world domination) is an honest, intelligent submissive with integrity and a strong sense of self- worth.  I'm not looking for perfection, I looking for potential.  Playmates are nice, ownership is better; one who has a desire and is eager to serve. someone who would enjoy Carmina Burana or Aerosmith or Aerosmith doing Carmina Burana is a definite plus. Sounds simple enough...wonder if I can get this done before Imbolc ?

12/4/2010 6:31:58 PM

10/30/2010 8:41:12 PM

"You can't change other people. You can only change yourself"
- H. H. Getter


Enjoying the "search" quite a bit right now. Oh, yes I still want andcontinue to search for an acceptable submissive to call my own, but sometimes it's just fun to have a little fun. Life has a funny way of giving you what you need, when you  need it; whether you know it or not.

8/12/2010 7:08:08 PM
Interviewing a potential submissive is like window shopping at a closed store. You see what look really good through the glass, you go back when the store open and looks better in the window.

6/16/2010 8:36:27 AM
This weekend I'm going to Richmond to attend a friends' wedding and perhaps have a little fun on the side. Richmond beware Talyn will be back in town. 

5/24/2010 3:15:11 AM
The weekend was absolutely amazing. My sisters and I all had a wonderful time with Jay Wiseman.  What fortunate mortals are we.

5/19/2010 4:42:40 AM
Less than 48 hours until the Dragon arrives. Fortunately she will arrive by airplane so her wings will be ready to swing a flogger or two this weekend. Let the Domme games begin!

5/14/2010 9:41:38 AM
Ive been away from my community for way to long. So TIED here I come(next week). Looking forward to seeing Jay Wiseman next weekend,got my book ready for him to sign. My sister is coming in from Texas, subbies better beware. The 4 Dommes of the Apocalypse are about to hit Central Virginia!

5/8/2010 2:36:25 PM
Beltane came and came and went. A great time was had by all. Now the most exciting news of the season. My sister the Dragon  will be visiting from Texas. We are going to the Jay Wiseman weekend put on by TIED  and we fully intend to paint the town Red, Black and blue.

4/24/2010 8:59:17 PM
My ex husband died unexpectedly two weeks ago. It's been a long two weeks.  Tommy was also in the lifestyle. Actually I took him to his first ROPE party way, way, way back in the day when we both lived in Chesterfield , VA. Funny how life evolves and seems to throw you a curve ball or two .Were we divorced-- happily, friends-- definitely, loved our daughter absolutely. He will be missed by many indefinitely.


4/24/2010 8:55:41 PM
Yep, been a while. Life is better than good, except for the continued search for that elusive submissive. I have yet to discover that special spark with someone . Someone with passion and honesty for one without the other is boring, boring. Lies, cheating, bullshit is so not me. Which explains why I am at home on on Saturday night, when there are several play parties in the area. Maybe next month.

2/3/2010 7:41:11 PM
Happy 2010 the year of me!
Hmmm well after being trapped in the house for four days with my teenagers--I now know that I am Not a masochist(just a long suffering mom). Anyhow search for a submissive is going very well. During the process I have met some wonderful folks; no one that I want to collar but definitely some kewl folks. Will keep it going until I find him or her(the joys of being bi).

11/13/2009 10:35:52 PM
Looks like I will be attending the munch this upcoming Sunday in Chesapeake. Should be interesting.

11/13/2009 10:35:43 PM
Looks like I will be attending the munch this upcoming Sunday in Chesapeake. Should be interesting.

9/18/2009 7:56:21 PM
Has it really been four months since I wrote in my journal? seems to be an inpediment to my other self. Still seeking a toy . My sister has a toy--I want one. Maybe I should move to Texas?Nope! I still believe that Virginia is for lovers--or else.

5/14/2009 7:58:00 PM
Beltane has come and gone. It makes me love my home even more-camping is not very dommelike s it involves the port-a-potty. lol.

4/26/2009 11:08:10 AM

4/26/2009 11:05:46 AM
Boots are the most amazing invention ever. I love em, love buying em, love wearing them even more. If I won the lottery I would buy--yep more boots. 


4/19/2009 3:54:57 PM
I have found one thing more dominant than me--the common cold, ugh!

4/5/2009 3:46:42 PM

It's been an interesting week I've met with 2 submissives. One was quite interesting and I am looking forward to exploring possibilities with him. The other was a prime example of everything I hate about the internet; trite, stupid and unable to express anything worth listening to, so after 10 minutes I left him where I found him...Ugh. I guess my sister was right to get to the prince(sses) you have to kiss a frog or two…Life what a wonderful journey.

Now for the big question who's more dominant me or my dissertation committee; I think it's time for me compromise but I shall never surrender. Because as my mentor says the best dissertation is a done dissertation. (hmm sounds like a t- shirt to me). 




3/15/2009 3:52:43 PM
So I am actively, as opposed to passively, seeking a submissive. the usual issues have alrady reared their ugly heads; location, location, location. I've made afew adjustments to ensure my peace of mind. I have redefined "local". It's still not Europe or Bali, but definitely more than my initial parameters.
Life..its all about compromise(some). 

3/15/2009 3:49:38 PM
There's a storm brewing.... my sister Mzticstormz is or will shortly be here in VA. Look out! it's gonna be a Texas tornado!

3/7/2009 2:54:02 PM

Went out today after the migraine from hell last night. While in the thrift store I helped a poor confused cross dresser pick out a really cute outfit, lol. He was really taken aback when I told him his first choice wasn't his color.(big blush on his part). I then proceeded to pick out a few things that would flatter him-color and style and sent him on his  merry way. Hopefully, a little style wiser.
That was my kinky good deed for the day.
Now where the hell is my reward.... 

3/6/2009 1:30:28 PM
Bored, today feeling spring fever! I just added an audio greeting to this darn profile. Is Collarme ibecoming quantity over quality?

2/16/2009 7:01:56 PM
Contrary to what that ground hog says, Spring is coming and the sooner the better. With Spring will come new opportunities, both in and outside of the lifestyle. I'm getting closer to you--I can just feel it.

1/31/2009 9:35:10 PM

Its 1230 am and I’m sitting here taking a break from my amazing life as a doctoral student. I have been checking my collarme mail from my wonderful sister in kink and from wannabes, whiners and those who have no concept of distance. Yes you are hot but you live on another continent.  As I won't be relocating, you live in California, might as well be another continent. Surely there must be one single, submissive individual (m/f) with the ability to make an intelligent, serious inquiry.

1/11/2009 4:35:27 PM
Happy 2009. I started the year with a bang and Va Beach will never quite be the same. When you have to send a letter of apology to your friends a day after your NY Eve party--well great parties, great story but I'll use more discretion and less 151 this year in my punch--the dominator. 

Let's see, gonna take a break for the next month or so--have to  do a doctoral thing. Then back to my search for a LOCAL submissive. hah!

12/18/2008 8:08:48 PM
Definitely on the down slide of 2008.  That d**n solstice tree is finally up and decorating the tree reinforces that everyone has an occasonal masochistic tendency. Now the tree looks great and the house is getting back to normal(ok not as crazy as before). I have decided to provide a little solstic gift ; the definition of lo·cal (kəl).
  1. relating to place
  2. of, characteristic of, or confined to a particular place or district
  3. not broad; restricted; narrow local outlook
  4. of or for a particular part or specific area of the body; not general
    local Synonyms
    sectional, insular, divisional, territorial, situal, district, provincial, neighborhood, town, civic,.

    Hope this helps all of those subs in New Zealand(and other areas) who seem  more than a bit confused.

12/14/2008 9:49:18 PM
Ah the joys of Solstice are upon us. A new year is about to begin -2009 and I have got to get back into the swing of things(floggers and single tails come to mind). Now , if only I could find someone who understands the definition of LOCAL.

5/28/2008 7:57:50 PM
Blakeian is not a musician, lol. Far from it and A. Blake is actually a woman.

4/13/2008 11:49:56 AM
Beltane rapidly approaches.

4/6/2008 9:49:05 AM
I had a reply to my first journal posting. Apparently a submissive(out of state) has informed me that my requirements of locality is just too much to expect; so I blocked him. That requirement is NOT up for debate, now more than ever. 

3/30/2008 3:46:13 PM
Bordom has reared its' ugly head. The submissives who are the most interesting are the most distant(in actuality). No one piques my interests. Are my standards to high or are my choices too low? Good question. For now I must consider the answer. 

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