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| First off the chat function does not play well with my preferred operating system, so I will not accept chat requests
I am lifestyle, which means I have a nice stable,vanilla career and a kinky interests. I have absolutely no interest in pro domme work.
Ideally I am looking for a relationship dynamic that resembles TPE or FLR. I do not think I can get what i need in another dynamic This is a big undertaking on both parts, requiring talk , planning and all that boring real life stuff. I am looking for a proactive person with a good head on their shoulders - as I like the dynamic of domestic / personal assistant rather than micromanaging another's every move. I am not interested in parenting, either children or a partner. I want someone who will add to and support my personal and professional life.
Life is very sweet . I have decided to spend this portion of my life traveling the country. I am fortunate to have found a job that will allow that. I would hope that the person I choose to travel with would have a location independent income source, or able to take direction and work on my projects.
I will not be looking seriously until the fall, as I am busy with life things until then.
I am perfectly happy to be alone and play with people at each city I visit . I am not in any hurry.
Personality things. I have a huge geek streak. I have a whole list of Scifi and odd little interests that keep me happy. There is usually some sort of project going on in my life. I have Celiac disease - which means a strict gluten free- modified paleo diet or I get rashy and ill. If this is an issue move on by. I am allergic to latex, so there will be NO latex around my person. I am well versed in safe sex, sans latex. I provide all dildoes , strap ons etc, as I need to keep myself safe.
BDSM things. I am a realistic top. I have a fluctuating list of interests that change with my moods. I use this as an avenue to be a bit hedonistic and selfish with my wants. I am not into heavy humiliation. I do not like to yell. I feel if I have a yell, there is a dynamic problem. I am more of an impish sadist who will say sweet things while I hurt you.If I am feeling sensual, I will tease and be sympathetic while I refuse to allow you to cum. I am a lover of service . If you can make a GOOD pot of tea, I may fall in love. I feel loved when my things are kept tidy. I am a hedonistic recipient of foot rubs and worship.
D/s things. I believe in a teaching period to set up systems, then I feel it is up to the bottom type person to maintain said systems. I believe it is the bottoms job to protect my things - including themselves. I need a person who has decent communication skills.
Sexuality things . I am queer, pan sexual evolving or however you want to label it. I have had long term relationships with males, females, intersexed ,and MTF transgendered people. I have not been attracted to FTM people historically, but butch girls are fine. I like male bodies to be hard. If I have the urge for soft skin, I prefer someone who has boobies.
I am not interested in being monogamous. I would like someone who supports this and will make breakfast- or at least serve coffee / tea.
Thought for the moment. The pursuit of something desired is an intoxicating thing. Watching the layers of self imposed barriers break down as you get closer to the object of your desire. The little indicators - down turned eyes, inopportune blushes, small unexpected stutters -
Current Limits: Fire, vomit, scat, natural latex, and the usual illegal things
Current Interests: I will review these if interested.
I am no longer updating my age, since it is irrelevant to me. I am over 40, or as is said- a woman of certain age. I have no inclination on making any children at this stage in my life, so the whole biological clock thing is irrelevant as well.
To me a friend is someone I know and have had intimate conversations with. If I have rejected your friend offer, it is because you do not meet my definition of a friend. I am old fashioned that way.
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DO MEN AND WOMEN smell differently? In at least one way, it seems that they do, and it may cause them to make different assessments about people as well. In a recent experiment, participants inhaled two different chemicals that appear to be human pheromones—androstadienone, notably produced by men, and estratetraenol, by women—while participants watched dot-outlines of a walking person. Smelling androstadienone caused heterosexual females and homosexual males to perceive gender-ambiguous outlines to be more masculine, whereas smelling estratetraenol caused heterosexual males to perceive gender-ambiguous outlines to be more feminine; the responses of bisexual/homosexual females fell in between heterosexual males and females.
Smell is one of the main components in sexual attraction. It has to do with histo immune compatibility .the biology of attraction is fascinating ;) |
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Well guess , what ? We are normal - just a bit adventurous ;)
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/curious/201404/what-is-sexually-normal-rethinking-pain-and-pleasure?tr=HomeEssentials |
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I love this blog post from Men Submit. I am adding this as an education post. I suggest you read the bog and buy their book.
Are you looking for a special dominant woman for a female led relationship? Do you ever struggle with what to say to women when you are messaging them for the first time? Or do you send messages out but never hear anything back? There are a lot of submissive men out there and fewer dominant women. So how do you successfully reach out to a dominant woman?
What NOT to write to a dominant woman?
Dominant women get messages every day. Most of them are terrible. Here is an example of messages that women have reported receiving in the last few weeks.
(From a man in India to a woman in the U.S.):
Hello Mistress
How are you?
I am slave who wish to own by a superior female and believer on female Supremacy…………
Mistress may I beg and request you to allow me to serve you and own by you?
How may I please and keep you smiling Mistress?
Mistress, I would feel myself Lucky if you do accept me….
Slave
joseph
hi there i am new to the lifestyle and would love to meet someone who will show me the ropes and teach me the right way to do things i have alot of fantasies i would love fulfilled. Would u like to talk sometime??
I just wanna stick my tongue as deep as itll go and suck out as much of your asshole into my mouth as I can
my dream will come true if You could please give me one chance . I am very much in ass worhsip Mistress
it ia total ruch while a WOman is sittig on my face sepecially when the woman allwows mr air
Can i be your sex slave or pet? I have panties, do some ass play and have a 5 inch penis you can make fun of if you think its small… i am open to new things also. I am very new to this lifestyle and i am looking for experience and guidance and to learn how to treat a mistress. message me if ur interested and we can chat more. please
I don’t think that every submissive man sends out these messages, and I do think that our members are better than these men. I show you these examples because I want you to understand a few things. First of all, dominant women are inundated with messages, and if they don’t respond to a message you send to them, it may be that they simply have given up on reading through all of the messages that they have received. The second thing that I want to point out is that in all of the messages above, the men made the same mistake. The message was all about them and meeting their kink. There is absolutely nothing in there that would interest a woman as an introductory message.
So what should you write to a dominant woman?
Before you write a message to a woman, make sure that you read her profile. Is she local enough to you that you could meet with her if you reached that point? Has she written any posts or blogs on the site? If so, read those. Once you’ve read everything, decide why she interested you. Simply being horny doesn’t count. The fact that she likes one kink you like does not count either. There should be something in there that interests you in her as a person, some reason why you would like to talk to her more or get to know her.
Now write her a short message that doesn’t have anything to do with kink. Let her know that you read her profile or a post and that you enjoyed what she had to say about something, or that you have a certain hobby or something in common. Let her know that you have a steady job, your own place to live, and so on. Tell her that you have hobbies outside of D/s (such as music, movies, sports, whatever) and enjoy discussing them with people.
Do not ask for her to do anything to you or tell her what kinks you like or want. Take some time to run it through a spell checker to make sure you are making a good impression.
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A lovely talk on human sexuality . I found it thought provoking, enjoy ;)
http://www.ted.com/talks/christopher_ryan_are_we_designed_to_be_sexual_omnivores#t-252853 |
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http://msrika.
I love this and would love to say thank yout MS Rika for posting this.
The following is a list by which submissives may judge (or be judged) as to how useful they are to their Mistress. I developed it based on my own subs activities (most of which they thought up themselves and requested I let them do) and then enhanced during conversations with an online submissive (not mine mind you). I hope it provides many good ideas on how a slave/sub can be useful in a service-oriented relationship; making the domme's life more pleasant and stress free. The items on the list are not intended to be part of fantasy play, but rather real tasks performed regularly by the slave/sub without the need to be reminded or 'ordered', and with as little supervision as possible. A slave with a high UQ makes Mistress' life easier, not more difficult, by his presence.
The scoring is easy. There are fifty items on the list. Two points are scored for every task done regularly (without the need of reminders), one is scored if the task is not desired by the Domme or simply does not apply, and zero points are scored otherwise.
I recommend that the sub take a self-exam, scoring himself and assigning a Utility Quotient. Afterwards, he should request that his partner administer the scoring. A comparison of how well the sub believes he rates vs. his score given by his partner will prove quite enlightening and should lead to some interesting conversation!
If you've been reading my articles, you know that true submission requires you to learn the needs of your partner. Therefore, this list is nothing more than a starting point. I welcome new ideas to the list and am anxious to hear what your partners are adding / removing.
Score well!
- Rika
The Sub Utility Quotient
Score: 2 points for tasks done regularly, 1 point for task not desired or not applicable, and 0 points for tasks not done regularly.
Housework:
1. Cook all meals and clean up afterwards.
2. Prepare a weekly menu and review it with your partner
3. Do the shopping for the food, track food usage, and keep the
kitchen stocked.
4. Clean the bathrooms (with brushes and cleanser, not your tongue)
5. Make the beds (including the pillows).
6. Do the laundry, iron, fold and put away.
7. Dust and vacuum and yes, do the windows too :)
8. Put out potpourris, candles, or oils with her favorite scents so that the house is always fragrant.
9. Feed, bathe, and groom the pets.
10. Take the children to school (or bring them to the bus stop).
11. Do home repairs within your capabilities.
12. Take the garbage pails to the curb on garbage nights.
13. Clean the pails after the garbage has been collected.
14. Package the recycling, wrap the newspapers and bring them to the curb on recycling days.
15. Prepare the monthly bills and payments for review and prepare all checks for the domme's signature.
Yardwork** :
16. Mow, edge, and trim the yard regularly.
17. Take care of the garden beds and trim the trees.
18. Make certain the lawn and flower beds are watered regularly.
19. Care for the pool and spa.
20. Keep the patio, drive, and garage swept and clean,
including cobwebs.
21. Remove the leaves from the gutters.
**(these items may be marked as 2 points each if the work is done by a lawn service AND the sub manages the relationship (i.e., payment, negotiations, appointment management, etc)
Nightly Activities:
22. Bring late night snacks while his partner watches TV.
23. Give up the remote! LOL!
24. Go on the Internet and research the Dish schedule (or TV Guide) and print out items which are of interest to the domme.
25. Get on the Internet and read the papers and her magazines to create the equivalent of an executive clipping service... articles of interest with key points highlighted.
26. Take down her bed (including the pillows).
27. Sit on the toilet seat before she needs to go in (in the winter it gets kind of cold).
28. Take her cell phone from her bag and put it on the charger (and then put it back in her bag, turned on, in the morning).
29. Draw the blinds and shades (and open them in the morning).
30. Put toothpaste on her toothbrush.
31. Fill her glass with water.
32. Bring her slippers.
33. Brush her hair.
34. Lay out the clothes she selects and press as appropriate.
35. Light scented candles, and put them out after she is asleep.
36. MASSAGE her back until she falls asleep (every night) :) :) :)
In the Car:
37. Keep a pager or cell phone so you can be called to pick her up at a moments notice.
38. Ask her if she'd prefer to drive!
39. If not, drive her wherever she needs to go and wait for her to
come out.
40. Arrive at the front of the building within 10 seconds of her first step outside the door, 5 if the weather is not good. Keep an umbrella handy and escort her to the car if it's raining.
41. Keep her favorite magazines and CDs in the car.
42. Never, ever criticize her driving or suggest a "quicker way" (unless she requests it).
43. Wash the car regularly inside and out.
44. Preheat and de-ice the car on cold mornings.
Around the House:
45. Pee sitting down so that the toilet seat is never up and you don't
leave "droplets".
46. Prepare her bath (and the kid's baths, if appropriate) and run the water until it's warm for her showers.
47. Paint her toenails.
48. Pick up her shoes from the front hallway and carry them to her closet, inspect them and polish them as need be (with real polish, not saliva).
49. Keep her favorite magazines, books and CD's ready in her favorite sitting areas.
50. Answer the phone and make phone calls for her (such as ordering items she's marked in a catalogue).
How'd you do?
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This is so,fun ;)
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x128qc1_robin-thicke-blurred-lines-sexy-boys-parody-by-mod-carousel_music |
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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/02/22/consensual-sadomasochism-altered-consciousness_n_4832170.html?utm_hp_ref=science
An interesting little article in a mainstream area ;) |
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A bit of Jazz :do you know who sings this ?
Peel me a grape, crush me some ice
Skin me a peach, save the fuzz for my pillow
Talk to me nice, talk to me nice
You've got to wine and dine me
Don't try to fool me bejewel me
Either amuse me or lose me
I'm getting hungry, peel me a grape
Pop me a cork, french me a fry
Crack me a nut, bring a bowl full of bon-bons
Chill me some wine, keep standing by
Just entertain me, champagne me
Show me you love me, kid glove me
Best way to cheer me, cashmere me
I'm getting hungry, peel me grape
Here's how to be an agreeable chap
Love me and leave me in luxury's lap
Hop when I holler, skip when I snap
When I say, 'do it,' jump to it
Send out for scotch, call me a cab
Cut me a rose, make my tea with the petals
Just hang around, pick up the tab
Never out think me, just mink me
Polar bear rug me, don't bug me
New thunderbird me, you heard me
I'm getting hungry, peel me a grape
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Clip from article read today :
A number of orchids mimic female insects to
entice visits from males looking for love. The goal of these
counterfeits is to dust the flying Romeos with pollen, which contain
plant sperm. When these males rendezvous with other flowers, they then
act as unwitting couriers of this pollen, helping the plants breed. Scientists
had thought such deception was harmless, but researchers now find males
of a species called orchid-dupe-wasps go all the way with Australian
tongue orchids, wasting their precious bodily fluids in the process. This
research began when evolutionary biologist Anne Gaskett at Macquarie
University in Sydney, Australia, saw these liaisons between wasps and
orchids. These were described to her as "pseudo-copulating," "but when
I saw these wasps mating with these tongue orchids, it didn't look
'pseudo' at all," she said.
I just love science.
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My prefered browser does not play well with the chat client used on this site.
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I have edited my profile because I found it's tone to be
defensive. I think it would be more suitable to describe the type of person I
am NOT interested in rather than being defensive.
There is a certain type of submissive/ person I am not interested in. I am not
interested in anyone who is not willing to get to know me as a person. I am not
interested in anyone who wants to see me
as a means to get their kink on- say as a whip with boob extensions.
I am not interested in any people who want to live out fantasies that have lived for far
to long in their head. I am not interested I meeting people who cannot
differentiate fantasy and reality. I am not interested in people who think I am
not a “true” or “real” dominant because I am not interested in scripting out
their personal fantasy by rote.
I am interested in talking to people interested in meeting
new people. I have met many interesting people since moving to Boston
and am interested in expanding my friends circle to include more kink friendly
people. I am very interested in meeting people who find it interesting
to discuss BDSM philosophy and how this whole dynamic works for them.
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11/14/06
Just a quick time saver. If you have written to me and have not gotten a response within a week it is probably due to one of the following reasons:
1) You are significantly over the stated age range I am interested in.
2) You sent me a one or two sentence email, or it is a cut and paste of your profile. I feel I am worth some effort.
3) Edit: no longer applies
4) You did not include the code word per instructions.
If none of above apply, then I am working overtime and do not have time. I will respond when I am available
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From a forum post that pretty much sums me up.
Hmmm my philosophy in BDSM......
I am simply am impish little sadist. This is a nice way to play with sensations and emotions. It gets the neurochemicals all excited. On a relationship level, I need to be the one who has the final say. I don't get off on micromanagement, so I choose pple who don't need that in the dynamic. I am comfortable in nontraditional relationships, so I avoid pple who need a white picket fence. I live with a geeky, cuddly, bratty little masochist, who I slap with a ruler if the toilet seat is left up.
I have a mission statement for my career , my educational plans, and parenting. I just have so many reality checks due to the career that I cannot take this aspect of my life too seriously. I like it, I have someone who likes it too, the rest is irrelevant. If I loose my Domme card over this I suppose I will just have to smack without a license.
Sylph |
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7/04/05Thought for the moment. The pursuit of something desired is an intoxicating thing. Watching the layers of self imposed barriers break down as you get closer to the object of your desire. The little indicators - down turned eyes, inopportune blushes, small unexpected stutters - taste of honey in my mouth.
My schedule seems to be occupied.
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| Age: 22 |
| PHILADELPHIA,
Pennsylvania |
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