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The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Creative and playful, Domme seeks a submissive man for a power exchange dynamic, S/m play, and eventual FLR/TPE. I am cheerful, a total toy nerd, compassionate, wicked, and lush-bodied. I love to cook, play, and learn.
  • Be a masculine cis male, 49-62 years old, SINGLE, willing, and able to serve in the Contra Costa County area 3-4 times a month. Be curious, single, with a masochist streak, and giving nature.
Seeking submission in return for My dominance, devotion in return for My delight in you… O/our relationship will develop over time, but these are the basics. Qualities I seek in a long-term dynamic are the ability to communicate, honesty, respect, etiquette/protocol, creativity, energy, motivation, and striving for excellence. This is the bigger picture of what I am looking for; the additional details will be determined through chemistry and negotiation if compatibility exists. Plan on meeting quickly. I attend local munches, so it should be easy if you live nearby. Excellent communication skills are extremely important and should be something you consider essential if responding to My query. You must be willing to go to munches and occasionally go to events (this includes vetting for the venue).
  • I am 100% romantically monogamous with the person I am in love and nest with when it happens. I don't expect the romantic/nesting partner to fill all My needs, but it sure would be the cherry on top if he did.
  • There is a difference between being in love with someone and loving someone.
  • I am kink poly - to meet My needs, I seek to have multiple play partners as I enjoy a multitude of kinks that not everyone likes. I hope a bond forms with those I play with regularly, but it is not expected.
  • Sexual encounters in any manner should not be assumed for any reason.
~~~~~ * ~~~~~ * ~~~~~ * ~~~~~ In response to My query, tell Me the following - Be detailed in your responses.
  • What does submission look like to you?
  • What is your experience as a submissive?
  • What services do you offer in a power exchange dynamic?
  • Where do you live?
  • What is your availability to serve?
  • Why are you interested in serving Me specifically?
Serious replies will be answered - I look forward to hearing from the man who will be the object of My desire. ~~~~~ * ~~~~~ * ~~~~~~ * ~~~~~ * ~~~~~ * ~~~~~ FYI - Additional information has come up, so here W/we go: Lashing out at Me or making demands will get you denied and blocked. Acts of omission are not acceptable. I must be able to speak to your partner if you say you are poly. This is absolutely required! If you already have a Dominant partner, I am unsuitable for you. I love High/Medium Protocol service and expect you to serve in High/Medium Protocol. I am not interested in online Domination of any sort. Do not call Me Mistress, Goddess, or any other honorific or endearment. I don't know you. I allow using Sydisa, Ms. Sydisa, Ms. S, or MS. Finally, I am a Lifestyle FemDomme. I am Dominant. I am a live human seeking someone special to enjoy this fantastic kinky world within a D/s, O/p, FLR/TPE relationship. I am not a switch or submissive.

First Letter to the Last Period

Did you take the time to read from the first letter to the last period (.)? Waffles/Pancakes with Maple Syrup with Scrambled Eggs, Mild or Medium Roast Black Coffee, iced tea with Blackberry Syrup, or A well-made Napletano Pizza Margarita are some of My favorite things. Mention one or several in your message and why you are doing so.

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5/16/2023 7:15:08 PM


I am curious. I asked this question of several submissive men who responded to my ad; do you have a kinky resume?  This is exactly like a normal resume but instead details your kinky experience. I was told no; they did not have one. 

Because my group is D/s oriented, we took on an Owner's Manual and Kinky Resume for our group.  Wow, the responses and excitement were awesome. As a group, we decided the work put into both of these items would help either side of the sash get to know their partners on a deeper level, and if triggers were set off, we each could handle them better.  This ramped up negotiations to a new level.  As one of the co-moderators for the event said, every car we own comes with an owner's manual, so why not one for us, like a car, we have moments when our "lights come on," or the shit hits the fan. 

This is something I want to see. Everyone claims experience, but what classes are they taking to be good at XYZ?  What events do they attend, and so on. 

What do you think? 

5/16/2023 6:54:16 PM

Requirements, not Expectations. 

 Respect My time

Match My efforts 

Keep your word

Always be honest

Stay consistent


  • Show up, be on time (words/actions)
  • I will not work harder than you
  • Your word is the honor you start with
  • Omission is the choice you willingly make
  • Consistency builds trust.


Start out being the best you can be and grow.

Think about each of these: how to improve a relationship or blow it up by choosing not to do these things. 

5/11/2023 7:16:03 PM

Dear men,

Before you say I'm "extra" and "too much," ask yourself ... "are you even enough"?

Compliments of the Single Woman.

The right man will love you right.

5/11/2023 7:11:38 PM

Favorite statements~

  • Whatever you wish, Madame
  • I'll do whatever she tells me to do

5/11/2023 7:07:14 PM


This is the intimate relationship I want~

The mandate of transparency means that we can be open about our flaws, work through them, and come together stronger. 

We are each other’s safe space, brave space, and necessary space. 

The commitment to the relationship in a long-term way makes us both more willing to dig in and make things work. We need to be motivated to figure out ways to make it work. 

“Trust Junkie” – Earning Trust by being trustworthy.  I can’t demand trust unless I give him every reason to trust me. At the same time, the same is true for him. Work together always for the betterment of the relationship. 

Understand that trust can be earned, and as fast, trust can be lost. You choose how or if you earn or lose trust.  Getting trust back takes a glass house, if at all. 

Regular check-ins, not a time out or a break from the relationship to talk about the relationship. Make regular time to talk with each other. Note I am not saying at the person but rather with the person. Make lists to help you remember what you want to talk about.  Spend time after the check-in together. Have a meal/snack, snuggle, cuddle, touch each other, and feel the person you are so close with. 

         This builds positive reinforcement – closeness.


R. Kaldara made a post and talked about similar things. I rewrote/twisted it to match my desires. Some of the wording is mine, and some is his. I give some of the credit to him. 

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